Chapter Text
Correspondence - Zhongli, Diluc, Kaeya
Kaeya
marvelous job on the domain runs today guys
Tartaglia
fuck off we all died
Kaeya
zhongli lived
Tartaglia
he did 600 dmg per hit it took us 6 mins to clear that 1
Diluc
blame kaeya & zhongli
Zhongli
I only built my shield strong enough for me personally, you guys just have to dodge.
Tartaglia
WHAT R WE PEASANTS
Kaeya
our co op team has 0 healers
should have expected this u fucker
Diluc
why did we team up with these people jean and lisa were fine
Zhongli
I recall that it was Kaeya who proposed the idea.
Tartaglia
kaeya u bitch
Kaeya
shut up
Correspondence - Kaeya, Ganyu, Venti
Ganyu
up for runs?
Keqing
i just blew all my matts with ningguang
Venti
im drunk and tired
Kaeya
why are you online
Venti
idk gaming addiction
ganyu if u need help i can just do some runs probably wont claim tho
poor as shit
Keqing
i think zhongli mona and venti are the only f2p ones lmao
Ganyu
Can’t relate
Kaeya
in my defense. i spent 15$ only
Venti
shut up u spent like 70$ for that weapon banner last week
Kaeya
SHHHHH
Correspondence - Zhongli, Mona, Xiao
Zhongli
Please pool funds
Venti
what happened my dude
Mona
the 2 gingers told him to upgrade his shit
now he has like 6 mora
Xiao
our combined group savings is 16k mora
Venti
not even that because i spent all of it upgrading my artis
XIao
my god
ask ur rich friends to join our guild
Venti
forcing them right now
Guild Correspondence
Diluc has joined the guild conversation
Tartaglia has joined the guild conversation
Ningguang
welcome to the charity chat
Beidou
literally pooling all the rich people right now
Kaedehara Kazuha has joined the guild conversation
Kaedehara Kazuha
please give me money
i blew all of it in 3 minutes
Beidou
my dude your back
Keqing
*you’re
Venti has left the guild conversation
Beidou
go fuck yourself
define “all of it”
Kaedehara Kazuha
18m
Mona
get out of my guild
Kaedehara Kazuha
get good lmao
anyways i need a loan
Mona
the only loan you’ll get is my middle finger
Kaedehara Kazuha
well fuck u too
i need around 50m more to max out my shit please help
Ningguang
i cant cover that
Tartaglia
you are the richest player globally
fuck off you literally have 900b in posession
Ningguang
i cant cover that
Tartaglia
YOU HAVE MORE THAN WHAT IVE EARNED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE
Diluc
i didnt know you were jealous of monetary gains
Mona
stop flaunting your wealth
Tartaglia
fuck off
Tartaglia has left the guild conversation
Correspondence - Amber, Jean, Lisa
Amber
the amount of rage i feel is unreal
Kaeya
what happened
Lisa
hunt for good pyro artifact no luck so far
Jean
We’ve done around 30 runs and amber has gotten one good artifact
Kaeya
rough
Amber
we’re clearing slow af as well
lisa’s the only one doing dmg we need a hydro
this close to getting jeans sister in here but thats 2 healers
Kaeya
get mona
Jean
she says shes busy
Kaeya
trust me shes not just say you’ll pay her
Lisa
what if im not paying her
Kaeya
guess ur fucked
Amber
this is why our guild funds constantly deteriorate
Jean
it feels like ningguang’s the only person holding it together
Lisa
oh please imagine using guild funds
Kaeya
im co-leader u fucker
yesterday you took 7k
Lisa
how much to stfu
Kaeya
a lot actually
Amber
help domain pls otherwise ill lose my shit
ive gotten nothing but def this is maddening
Jean
alright alright
Correspondence - Xingqiu, Chongyun, Xiangling
Chongyun
did someone go on my acc
Xingqiu
i didnt
Hu Tao
HACKER????
Xiangling
what happened
Chongyun
someone spent all of my talent books
Xingqiu
i did that last week and you just noticed
Hu Tao
he never checks talent lol
chongyun does like 1 dmg :P
Chongyun
I DO NOT
Xiangling
your talents were at lv 1 for the longest time before xingqiu went in your account and leveled them for you
Xingqiu
oh the dark, dark times
Hu Tao
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
we're reaching rank 50 and he still has lv 4 talents
Chongyun
i dont have the funds
Xiangling
ask the guild
Xingqiu
you think they'd just give some random teenagers money
Hu Tao
i give zhongli money
he's getting hard cash from a teenager
how sad
Xingqiu
yeah well you employed him
you should be paying him
Hu Tao
minor details.....
Current World Population: 4/4
Xiao
zhongli carry
Tartaglia
all of us died within 6 seconds
Hu Tao
heyhey at least we beat him
Zhongli
It appears it is wise to bring a shield into that domain afterall
Xiao
my healing gadget ran out instantly
Hu Tao
I TOLD YOU TO RESTOCK
Tartaglia
the shield deflect one shotted us lol
hu tao and xiao were on life support theyre probably dying either way
Xiao
4k hp is not life support
Zhongli
You were running around and jumping.
If there was a screen totaling our damage, you would probably score 3rd
Xiao
hu tao and childe had the vaporize comp going
its not fair
Hu Tao
get good
Tartaglia
what u get for maining anemo
Xiao
IT MATCHED MY AESTHETIC
Hu Tao
aesthetic of EDGINESS
Xiao
SHUT UP
Current World Population: 3/4
Kaedehara Kazuha has entered the world
NIngguang
who joined
Kaedehara Kazuha
hey
Beidou
heyyyyy
Keqing
oh hello
Kaedehara Kazuha
whats going on
i meant to steal beidous flowers but here i am conversating
NIngguang
we're just hanging out
rank 55 things ykyk
Keqing
we were having a intense roleplay before we got the "is trying to join the world" request
then we freaked out and stopped
Beidou
KEQING IM THIS CLOSE TO KICKING YOU
Kaedehara Kazuha
dont let me cockblock you please continue
what was it about
Ningguang
anyways is anyone up for geo boss i need some matts
Keqing
yeah sure
Beidou
ok tp
Kaedehara Kazuha
DONT IGNORE ME
Correspondence - Ganyu
Ganyu
down for co op?
Keqing
damn im in beidous world rn
Ganyu
oh rip
its alright my wl's not even high enough to join her lol
Keqing
yeah
its full as well
Ganyu
hmm
how bout tmr?
Keqing
bet
Correspondence - Kaeya
Kaeya
hey
Tartaglia
what
Kaeya
what r u doing
Tartaglia
event
i need the fucking money
Kaeya
dont tell me you're tryna pass ningguang
you have like 5% of her wealth
Tartaglia
more like 1% because i just spent a shit ton upgrading
please help me i cant beat this level
Kaeya
ok bet u loser
Tartaglia
suck my cock
Guild Correspondence
Venti has entered the guild conversation
Venti
whats up my little dildoheads
Hu Tao
DILDOHEADS
Xiao
ur not funny
Venti
awww dont be mad my little dildohead
Chongyun has entered the guild conversation
Lisa has left the guild conversation
Chongyun
wtf
Venti
behold: the dildoheads
Hu Tao
omg
whos guild leader
change the fucking name rn
Xiao
we'd get banned
Hu Tao
but it would be funny
Xiao
it would not
Mona has entered the guild conversation
Mona
guild leader is me and i refuse to do it
Venti
come on pussy
Mona
no
i refuse to be referred to as the dildoheads
Xiao
if any one of you changes the name im leaving
Mona
dont worry i believe in dictatorship
i didnt give full perms to the co leaders they deserve nothing from me
Chongyun
i cant tell if thats a good thing or bad thing
Xiao
good thing
i refuse to be known as apart of the dildoheads
Kaedehara Kazuha has entered the guild conversation
Kaedehara Kazuha
you guys are not funny
Kaedehara Kazuha has left the guild conversation
Hu Tao
yeah well you're a loser
Venti
non believer so beta
Current World Population: 4/4
Kaeya
im alive
holy shit im alive
Diluc
that one time we didn't get frozen 800 times
Tartaglia
i hated that
Zhongli
Good job, everyone!
I reached maximum score now, so thank you!
Tartaglia
how tf
Diluc
probably did a run with xiao or hu tao
Kaeya
i hated that
childe threw
Tartaglia
i have +0 on my defense stat on my artifacts
not my fault i die every 6 seconds blame my luck
Diluc
if that isnt the pettiest flex idk what is
Tartaglia
your mom LOLOLOL
Kaeya
zhongli
kick him
now do it now
Diluc
i support this idea
Tartaglia
the one time you two agree on something its exiling me
i see how it is
Zhongli
Let's attempt the dungeon again
Diluc
yes another magnificent idea
Kaeya
if it isnt for the cash i wouldnt be putting myself through this
Tartaglia
get good
Kaeya
YOU DIED THE MOST
Tartaglia
I ALSO DID MOST DMG
Diluc
most dmg was me u loser
Tartaglia
every time i co op with you guys i get no rights
Zhongli
Do something about it
Tartaglia
yeah alright
Current World Population: 1/4
Beidou has entered the world
Beidou
hey
Ningguang
wyn
Beidou
oh great mother of all riches
please let me mine your rocks
amen
Ningguang
LMAO
go ahead
while you're at it save some cor lapis for me i need that shit
Beidou
anything for u mother of all riches
wealth = power
Ningguang
i agree
which is why i have so much of both
Beidou
so true
ill get started
Ningguang
go on go on
Correspondence - Jean, Lisa, Kaeya
Kaeya
so about the artifact farming
Amber
two
ive had two(2) decent ones so far
im running out of mora
sometimes i think its a good one but the 4th one ends up being hp or def and they all go there instead
im losing my mind
Lisa
yeah
half of mine are just def lmao i have no hope
Jean
i dont really...pay attention?
Lisa
its ok you already heal more than enough
Kaeya
imagine having def
low standards
Amber
listen here funny man
your standards cant be high when all you're getting is shit
Kaeya
how much res have yall spent so far
Lisa
like 600
last time i spent 1k in one day and only got 3 good ones
Jean
3?? i got like one
i did get 5 of similar stats but they all went to def/hp
Amber
this is why barbara heals so much
and noelle never fucking dies
and hu tao one shots everything
rng is in their favor
im losing my god damn mind i might auction some of these off to hu tao
Lisa
how unfortunate
Kaeya
this is sad to watch
Jean
rng is never in anyone's favor and i think we've all learned that today
Amber
too late
i already learned that lesson 2 months prior
Lisa
pussy
ive known that since birth
Kaeya
ive known since i was a fetus
Lisa
ive known since my mother was a fetus
Kaeya
ive known since my grandmother was a fetus
Amber
SHUT UP I AM HAVING A CRISIS
Jean
can someone wire me 500k mora really quick...
Lisa
oh great now jean's broke as well
Kaeya
everyone is fucking broke
Amber
i have like 100k mora now
i started today with 1m
Lisa
how unfortunate
Kaeya
today we learned an important lesson: monetary gains are essential