floating_cats
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Summary
Tenten thinks she has declared her love for her best friend's cousin in the worst possible way: handing Hinata a (signed) doodle of their wedding.
She enlists Lee to get it back.
If only things could be easy...
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As Neji walked to the shops and then back home, he might have seemed calm to the untrained eye, but anyone who knew him would’ve wondered why he was visibly shaking with rage. His mind spun wildly, wondering when? and how! and why?! As far as he was aware, Tenten and Kiba had never even had a proper conversation, and now they were kissing in the moonlight?! Then he remembered: the fucking play.
Or: Neji doesn't understand his Feelings, pines (needlessly) for Tenten, and tries to direct a musical.
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Itachi is forced to do a philosophy project with Deidara and Hidan. It goes about as well as expected.
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The man chuckled. ‘There's an ancient solution for these sorts of things. Fairytale stuff!’ Tenten sighed in relief. ‘True Love’s Kiss,’ he continued. ‘Or rather, Artificial Love’s Kiss.’
A growing sense of horror was spreading through Tenten’s body. ‘You mean…’ She did not want to know what Neji would do to her if he knew that she had somehow put into motion a chain of events that led to him kissing Sasuke Uchiha.
Or: Tenten buys a love potion online (for research!). Everything goes wrong.
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the twin arts of seduction and poetry: a guide, by sasuke uchiha by floating_cats
Fandoms: Naruto
13 Jun 2020
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Summary
Sasuke Uchiha - supervillain, cat-lover and wannabe poet - attempts to woo the Woman of his Dreams.
'i would prefer normal death threats, thank you' from Sasuke's POV.
Series
- Part 2 of SasuHina superhero/bad poetry AU
Recent series
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- Words:
- 6,948
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 8
Recent bookmarks
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Elle's always noticed women. Elle, Enid, and Vivian, lovers and friends in law school, learning how to be who they are.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,795
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 209
- Kudos:
- 3,400
- Bookmarks:
- 848
- Hits:
- 26,920
Bookmarked by floating_cats
29 Nov 2022
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“Alright, kings,” Naruto says, at a house meeting nominally called for “finances.” “So I slept with...a dude.”
“Was it Sasuke,” Neji asks. He sounds bored.
“What! I mean, uh, no?”
Series
- Part 2 of have your cake
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,707
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 196
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- 7,840
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- 1,029
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- 62,012
Bookmarked by floating_cats
16 Jan 2022
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“What’s it like to give a blowjob?” Naruto asks.
“Pretty easy,” Sasuke says. He doesn’t want Naruto to talk about blowjobs. He shifts a little on the bed. His face feels warm.
“That’s it? Easy?”
“What, you want details?”
Series
- Part 1 of have your cake
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,595
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 138
- Kudos:
- 7,697
- Bookmarks:
- 1,331
- Hits:
- 80,938
Bookmarked by floating_cats
16 Jan 2022
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Summary
As an ANBU Captain, Tenzou made all the right choices, so why does he still feel like a failure?
Bookmarked by floating_cats
04 Jun 2021
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Summary
The thing is, Illya's daemon doesn't behave like a daemon. She behaves like, well, a cat.
Bookmarked by floating_cats
06 Jan 2021