1 - 20 of 34 Bookmarks by Normal_Cactus
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In which Billy Hargrove is a rabid man-eating tiger, Eddie Munson has a very confusing night to add to an increasingly confusing life, and Chrissie Cunningham's taste in music apparently includes at least one song from the British Invasion of the 60s.
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
06 Feb 2026
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“Do you remember why you crashed your car?” Steve asks. He pins his gaze on the stretch of black tree limbs against the suede blue of the night sky.
“I hit a deer,” Billy says shortly.
“The thing is,” Steve says, he brings his gaze to Billy, “I don’t think you did.”
Billy scoffs. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Steve shrugs. “Whatever you hit, it wasn’t a deer.”
“Oh really?” Billy asks snidely. “Then what was it?”
“The Monster Squad calls it the Mindflayer.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 87,849
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 109
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- 1,780
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
08 Jan 2026
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In which Somewhere Else is nearly ten years in the past, Martin curses whoever designed Oxford University, and he has to rely on his boyfriend's not-yet-ex-girlfriend if he wants to find Jon.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
04 Aug 2025
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The new guy coming into Martin's work keeps on pestering him, but it's fine because he's cute. With every shitty thing going on in Martin's life, a small flirt never hurt anyone, even if Jon is totally out of his league with his ripped jeans and painted nails.
OR
Martin, the new clerk at the corner store, refuses to sell Jon his cigarettes because he isn't old enough, and it would be "illegal".
Thankfully, Jon is stubborn enough not to admit defeat. He just has to keep on trying.This isn't about the cigarettes anymore, is it?
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
07 Jul 2025
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“It’s a preexisting condition,” Jon explains, sipping more bitter tea. “I sort of got—hm. You know Spiderman?”
Tim raises an eyebrow.
“Heard of him, yeah.”
Jon nods, studying his tea.
“It’s sort of like that,” he says. “A spider killed and ate me when I was a child, and now I can’t stay dead.”
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Resurrection isn't all it's cracked up to be.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,587
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 7
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- 490
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- 4,785
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
11 Feb 2025
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i'd bleed myself dry for you (over and over again) by OverlyObsessed223
Fandoms: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
20 Sep 2022
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Four's breath is caught in his throat as he slips out of his bed, cautiously taking a few steps forward, reaching out to touch this battered and broken image of himself with a trembling hand, but it's met with nothing, save for icy cold air.
It’s like this boy is… his own ghost.
or, Klaus lives a life of death after death. It haunts him.
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
10 Feb 2025
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"My, My head hurts," he replied dumbly, "And I had a… A really terrible nightmare."
And god, did the last few years feel like a nightmare. A horrible, never-ending nightmare that twisted into shapes Jon never thought possible and took more from him than he knew he had to take.
"Must have been some nightmare," Tim hummed.
"It was," Jon laughed humorlessly.----------------
After the conclusion of the Watcher's Crown, Jon finds himself waking up in a much younger version of his own body, one that's still working with Tim and Sasha in research. Jon refuses to let this opportunity pass him by, refuses to let this world fall to the same fate as his. He'll do it better this time. He'll save everyone, no matter the cost.
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Updates SaturdaysSeries
- Part 1 of Right By Them - A Fix-It of sorts
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 267,154
- Chapters:
- 55/55
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- 8
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- 4,246
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- 4,261
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
03 Feb 2025
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She’s fifteen when it happens. Jinx has no one to blame but herself and her own curiosity, but in her defense, Sevika got drunk and just wouldn’t shut up about all the fun she got up to in Babette’s brothel. And in the Undercity, kids don’t stay kids for long. Jinx has grown up around this nonsense for years. So she bites the proverbial bullet and decides to see what all the fuss is about.
“It was one time!” Jinx complains in sheer disbelief. “It wasn’t even that good!”
Series
- Part 1 of Ankle-Biter
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 66,695
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 985
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- 7,946
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- 1,873
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
16 Dec 2024
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In which Jayce catches a cold, and Viktor can't catch a break.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
12 Dec 2024
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The closest Alastor's ever gotten to romance comes in the form of—in order of increasing hilariousness—a couple of botched youthful attempts at kissing, cheap mass-produced smut comics, and the wildly entertaining tales of other people's sordid affairs.
He's never wanted sex. He's never wanted love. He's never seen a problem with this.
It's taken about a century, but he's pleasantly surprised to discover that the rest of the world is finally starting to catch up with his perspective.
More than anything else, he’s pleased that these new modern attitudes have given him extra opportunities for bad puns.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,730
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 271
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- 3,808
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Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
09 Nov 2024
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It’s strange, the way things work out. Nebula has no idea why she’s the one with blue skin, when green has always been the colour of futile envy.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
15 Oct 2024
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Martin is restless.
That is hardly new. It’d been a few days since the world changed -since Jon changed-; the passage of time is mostly meaningless in this brand new hellscape, but that does not mean it is not still felt in one way or the other.
Martin has been patient. After all but barging through the door with Jon’s name on his lips, finding him gasping for air on the floor as everything changed -as Jon changed-, Martin had been a downright saint. Holding him while everything got rearranged, tiny piece by tiny piece, smoothing down Jon’s sweat damp hair, murmuring mostly meaningless reassurances.
Martin has been understanding. Jon’s mostly quiet, these days, still trying to fit all that he is in a single container of flesh and bones. Rerouting his thoughts to work with a human brain. Testing the edges of his consciousness.
It is a lot of work, Becoming.
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A door is opened. A lot more than what was bargained for comes in through.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
14 Sep 2024
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freedom
/ˈfriːdəm/the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action
**
The dreams haven’t changed, except in the way they did.He did not watch them as he used to, not anymore. He still does, as he has no say on the matter, but he can watch them from above, now. Circling them all like a bird of prey. Observe the replays of terror he’d seen dozens upon dozens of times over from a different point of view.
It was much easier to watch them from up there, to witness their struggle unimpeded; to be far, far removed from them, observe their confusion as they are once more stuck in reliving their trauma, and yet they cannot see their many-eyed tormentor anymore.
If only they’d looked up.
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Jon is given a gift.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
14 Sep 2024
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"Do you think I'm disgusting?"
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
01 Sep 2024
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Over and over, Pearl finds herself renegotiating her relationship with freedom. And renegotiating her relationship with Rose Quartz.
But at the end of the day, aren’t they the same thing?
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
16 Aug 2024
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Centuries ago there was Aphrodite, now called Martin Blackwood, the god of love. Martin spends his days creating bonds between people on Earth, too busy with the work he loves to find love for himself. When he is made aware that the sea god Peter Lukas wishes to take him as a consort, Martin has thirty days to find a husband or he will be forced into a relationship with Peter. He finds his husband- but is it really worth it in the end?
An Aphrodite and Hephaestus retelling
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
26 Jul 2024
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if it isn’t the mirror on the wall by goldstrvck (n_owsy)
Fandoms: The School for Good and Evil - Soman Chainani
15 Jun 2021
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Then, pray tell, what is it that exactly answers the question: who is the fairest of them all?
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
21 Jul 2024
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Saint Anthony Crowley, Patron of Lost Children by Thestarvedghost
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
28 Aug 2023
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“You didn’t have to eat that apple, and you don’t have to let me heal him.” Crawly tells her. “But I think both will benefit you, in the long run, eh?”
Eve’s eyes scanned his face, open in its indecision, before hardening, taking her baby and carefully handing him over to Crawly. “Whatever you can do,” she whispers. “ Please .”
Crawly lays a gentle hand on Cain’s forehead, healing him of all current ailments. Eve cries in joy when Cain’s eyes open, clear of pain.
“Don’t thank me,” Crawly tells her, begs her, handing Cain back to her before leaving.
He comes back a week later, to see how the baby is doing. Eve greets him more warmly than the last, and when he holds the baby this time, something in him breaks.
Although this would not be what they call it, Crawly would be the Earth’s first Godparent.
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AKA Crowley through the years, and the children he saved, and lost.
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
06 Jul 2024
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Archivist by day, Archivist by night by starspangledbread
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
18 Aug 2022
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Jonathan Sims does not believe in the supernatural, thank you very much. But when he wakes up one morning with what he thinks are possibly the world's worst superpowers, he realizes that both his reputation as a skeptic and new identity as a vigilante are in danger from his overly curious boss and nosy coworkers...
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
02 Jul 2024
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Summary
Pink wanted so much. Pearl gave and gave and gave until there was nothing left.
Series
- Part 1 of litany for survival
Bookmarked by Normal_Cactus
22 Jun 2024