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Your name is Dave Strider, and you are so fucked. You are beyond fucked, if you’re being honest about it. You are get-out-of-dodge fucked, as in, change your name, move to the Pacific Northwest, and hope no one finds you there fucked. You are also, notably, absolutely hammered.
Before you went through the tedious process of digging your own grave, you were at a party. You may have ended up sticking your nose somewhere that smelled like a lot of trouble and a little like vomit, but before that, you were having a lot of fun.
There were a non-zero amount of hot guys at that party. Some of them were actually looking at you for once in your miserable, celibate life. Some of them were even smiling at you, and feeding you shots, and you took them even if you kind of looked like an idiot the first couple of times.
Maybe that’s why you find yourself stumbling between the streetlamps on the quiet roads to Karkat’s house. You’d never seen him smile, but the two of you kind of had a thing going on.
At this point, you feel like a dead man walking, and you figure a guy deserves a last meal.
Or a first meal, you guess? Both?
Fuck it, both. Two in one, that should feel like a win.
It does not feel like a win when you almost trip and eat shit on the grass in front of Karkat’s house. Almost is the key word there though, and that moment of catching yourself— plus the night air pulling its weight in sobering you up— gives you the confidence to proceed as planned.
You put your weight into the glass of Karkat’s closed bedroom window, and you hear something snap as it slides open from the outside.
KARKAT: DAVE?
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?
KARKAT: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHERE I LIVE?
Once the mesh screen is also out of the way, you hoist yourself up and climb on in.
DAVE: sorry
DAVE: think i mighta broke somethin
DAVE: did i wake you up?
KARKAT: I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT GETTING READY FOR BED, BUT I AM NOW IN THE FORTUNATE POSITION OF THAT BEING THE LEAST OF MY WORRIES AT THIS PRESENT MOMENT.
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY RESPITEBLOCK IN THE FIRST PLACE?
DAVE: shhhut up
DAVE: is what im doin here
DAVE: take off your pants
KARKAT: EXCUSE ME?
DAVE: i
DAVE: am having
DAVE: the night of all time
DAVE: come on
DAVE: dont question it
DAVE: lose those tighty-whities
KARKAT: DOES THIS HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THOSE NEW FRIENDS OF YOURS?
KARKAT: I TRIED TO FUCKING TELL YOU-
He stops speaking when you move to close the distance between the two of you. Impatiently, you crowd him against the wall.
KARKAT: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
DAVE: karkat
DAVE: how much more explicit do i have to be??
DAVE: i just had a wombo combo of the best and worst night of my life
DAVE: like
DAVE: my life is going to be irreversibly different come tomorrow morning
DAVE: rewinding the tape wont undo the albums worth of bullshit i got up to in the last sixty to ninety minutes
DAVE: and the manager on duty at the music store just watched me fuck around listening to the whole thing and now she wants to make me pay for it
DAVE: but obviously im a broke ass sonofabitch if im listening to whole albums in the music store
DAVE: anyway
DAVE: that kinda night
DAVE: and my very first thought outside of fucking panic or dread or whatever was to come find you
DAVE: karkat
DAVE: karkles
DAVE: what i mean is
DAVE: i am really into you
DAVE: and i intend to get freaky with you about it
DAVE: right now
DAVE: that cool?
KARKAT: ...YOU KNOW WHAT? YEAH. OKAY.
His throat bobs nervously, and you lean down to kiss it. You feel him breathing against you, his chest rising and falling as you hover over him. It makes you extremely conscious of your own breath. You do your darndest to keep that shit under control, but it's a moot point. Your breath fans over his throat in awkward heaving bursts as your focus drifts back and forth between kissing his neck, and making sure you don't suffocate yourself against it.
Your heart hammers in your chest so hard, you're sure he can feel it too. He doesn't seem to mind though, a quiet chirr reverberating in his own chest as you continue to trail kisses towards his jaw.
DAVE: jegus
DAVE: youre beautiful
DAVE: you know that?
KARKAT: WHAT?
KARKAT: SHUT UP-
DAVE: no you shut up i mean it
DAVE: i think youre beautiful karkat
DAVE: not just right now like all the time
DAVE: when youre screaming in the faces of fuckers who deserve it
DAVE: all
DAVE: the
DAVE: time
DAVE: you say you act like an asshole all the time
DAVE: but first of all thats just not true youre only an asshole most of the time
KARKAT: OH WOW, WHAT A MEANINGFUL AND ROMANTIC SENTIMENT. I AM BEING SWEPT OFF MY FEET.
DAVE: just wait im getting somewhere with this
DAVE: trust the process
This feels like a good time for you to find the bottom seam of his shirt, your fingers slipping beneath the hem. Your hands drop from caging him against the wall, to fiddling with the loose cotton covering his torso. When you tug at it and your knuckles brush against his skin, he shivers but doesn’t protest. You go ahead and let your fingertips trail along his stomach, until there’s enough confidence in your palms to press them to his hips and feel the warmth there.
His shirt pools over your wrists, but you aren’t ready to take it off just yet. You have to finish telling him about how beautiful he is first.
DAVE: anyway so yeah youre an asshole
KARKAT: THIS IS THE PROCESS I’M SUPPOSED TO BE TRUSTING, DAVE?
DAVE: yes
DAVE: cus i know you care
DAVE: you care so much about everything all the damn time
DAVE: no shit it makes you angry
DAVE: theres so much bullshit and you just fucking deal with it
DAVE: you scream at it until it fucks off
DAVE: something about that is beautiful to me
DAVE: and when you arent angry??
DAVE: when shit is quiet
DAVE: between us i mean
DAVE: not only is that beautiful it feels special somehow
DAVE: something just for me you know?
DAVE: i wanna care about you back and i wanna show you parts of me that are special and just for you too
DAVE: thats what i want this to be
You squeeze his hips gently and feel soft skin mould around the shape of your hands. He doesn’t say another word. Instead, he rises onto his tiptoes to finally press his lips against yours. A dizzy darkness swirls your senses as your eyes flutter closed, and you get to just relax and kiss him back. You really thought you fumbled that for a second, but you must have gotten your point across somehow. Before you know it, he’s putting his hands on your shoulders and urging you to follow him as he drops back down onto his heels.
There’s barely a moment to adjust to that new angle, before he’s lowering his hands to grab his shirt from where it rests against your arms. He pulls it over his head, breaking your kiss. It feels like a tragedy, until he drops his shirt beside him, and you get to see every inch of skin that was hiding underneath. Pale grey meets candy red in six striking marks, three on either side of his torso.
DAVE: oh shit
You let go of your greedy hold on his hips to trace a featherlight touch over the bright red stripes across his ribs, finding that the skin there is soft and lightly raised into bumps.
It’s a little surreal. You know that baby trolls are born with six little insectile legs, and that when they grow up into the bipedal creature in front of you, that they’re left with bright coloured scars across their otherwise smooth, featureless torso.
Technically, the shit mammals have going on is objectively weirder. A belly button and nipples adorning your own torso, while his grub scars are not really unlike the stretch marks that line your back from when you sprouted up like a beanpole.
Knowing about grub scars hypothetically is very different from feeling them up for the first time though.
KARKAT: YOU’RE ACTING LIKE YOU’VE NEVER SEEN GRUB SCARS BEFORE.
He huffs, but you can tell his complaints are half-baked.
DAVE: i guess cause i kinda havent??
DAVE: not really
DAVE: not like this at least
Karkat turns his chin away from you, avoiding the threat of your gaze.
KARKAT: GREAT.
KARKAT: EVEN HUMANS THINK MY CANDY FUCKED RED FUCKING GRUB SCARS ARE WEIRD. FANTASTIC.
DAVE: what??
DAVE: no
DAVE: dude shut up i meant ive never seen grub scars on someone who is hot and right in front of me
DAVE: being able to like touch them and stuff
DAVE: what do they feel like?
DAVE: numb or sensitive or whatever
KARKAT: OH.
KARKAT: BOTH, I GUESS?
KARKAT: HAVEN'T WE FUCKING ALREADY BEEN OVER THIS? WE ESTABLISHED THAT THEY'RE BASICALLY THE SAME AS HUMAN TORSO BUTTONS.
DAVE: right yeah we did
DAVE: weird
KARKAT: OKAY FUCK YOU IT'S YOUR TURN NOW.
He wrestles your hands off his waist to urge you out of your jacket, and you've barely finished dropping it before he's tugging up the bottom of your shirt to relieve you of that as well. The neckline catches on your shades, and the two of you are a mess of fabric and hands for the brief moment it takes for you to help him out.
You wonder if this is sort of what it's like to struggle to get a bra off for the first time; the poor fool in front of you not nearly as familiar with the mechanics of it, and feeling vulnerable as hell once it's removed alongside your shirt.
You realize you spent way too much of your prepubescent time worrying about not looking like an idiot the first time you had to remove a bra, only for your first time actually getting naked with someone to be with Karkat— not to mention years later.
KARKAT: OH SHIT.
Now it's his turn, his gaze lingering in your cherry-red eyes before it trails down across your chest and settles at your torso.
DAVE: if you touch my belly button ill scream
DAVE: that shit is so weird im warning you now
KARKAT: OH, BUT MY GRUB SCARS WERE FAIR GAME?
DAVE: yes
KARKAT: WHAT IF I HAD STARTED SCREECHING LIKE A BLEATBEAST WHEN YOU TOUCHED THOSE? NEED I REMIND YOU THAT WE'RE BOTH NOOK DEEP IN THE UNFAMILIAR WATERS OF UNCHARTED TERRITORY?
DAVE: nah im fully aware and ready as hell to be nook deep in something else
DAVE: you know like maps and shit
DAVE: does this metaphor imply that i should take the proper precautions and do a litmus test on whatever comes out of you to make sure its safe for consumption or contact or
DAVE: whatever it is were about to get up to
KARKAT: WE AREN'T GOING TO GET UP TO ANYTHING, IF YOU KEEP REFERRING TO MY GEN-MAT AS “WHATEVER COMES OUT OF YOU.”
DAVE: do you guys seriously call it genmat what the fuck does that even mean??
DAVE: genetic material??
DAVE: is that what it means did i nail it??
KARKAT: YES, DAVE, YOU FUCKING NAILED IT.
DAVE: score one strider
DAVE: youre at zero by the way catch up man
KARKAT: I WOULD LIKE TO GO ON RECORD TO SAY THAT I THINK THAT CUM IS A STUPID NONSENSE WORD FOR IT. DOES THAT GET ME A POINT?
DAVE: no sorry
DAVE: not because i think youre wrong just because i think thats low hanging fruit and points should feel like youve earned them
DAVE: also asking for a point feels like its against the rules
DAVE: man fuck the rules actually
DAVE: i feel like were losing the plot here
DAVE: do you wanna keep talking shop about mapping our alien bodies or do you wanna just do it and go back to making out?
Karkat grins in response, and you're absolutely taken by the sight of it. You’re used to seeing his pointed teeth and long fangs when his mouth is pulled into a snarl, but something about catching a glimpse of them in his stupid little smirk; it has your stupid little heart doing this stupid little fluttering thing. That rumbling chirr starts up in his chest again, and he puts a hand on your waist, feeling the heat from your skin.
That’s all the warning you get before he urges you against the wall, effectively switching your positions. One hand stays on your waist while the other reaches above your shoulder to hold himself steady against the surface behind you. He leans into the motion and presses his lips against your chest.
Fuck, that feels nice.
You lean your head back against the wall behind you, and go back to trying to remember to breathe, Strider, breathe.
Wet kisses and careful grazes of sharp teeth have you feeling like you're swimming in your own brain. His warm breath tears little gasps from between your own lips whenever he comes up for air.
DAVE: you can bite me if you want to
DAVE: like leave bruises and stuff
DAVE: hickeys?
DAVE: dumb word for it but yeah you can do that if you want to
The words claw themselves out of your throat. Your flat affect falters under the pressure of staying cool while he kisses your skin, porcelain threatening your flesh with each touch of his lips. It sends shivers down your spine, and you ache for him to do it harder. He chirrs louder, deeper, and you feel him bare his fangs against you fully. His pointed incisors are confidently pointed at your neck, and blissfully sharp. But then he stops.
KARKAT: WAIT, WAIT, FUCK. ARE YOU SURE?
DAVE: yeah dude im very very sure
You suddenly feel like you are going to go more insane for every millisecond that you have to experience between now and whenever you get to feel those sharp teeth against your throat again.
KARKAT: BUT?
KARKAT: OH.
KARKAT: I SEE.
KARKAT: YOU'RE GOOD DAVE, I'LL GIVE YOU THAT ONE. I DID THINK IT WAS STRANGELY CONVENIENT THAT YOU WERE BEING SO SEEMINGLY FUCKING SINCERE FOR ONCE IN YOUR MISERABLE LIFE.
KARKAT: SO MUCH FOR THAT IDEA.
KARKAT: YOU REALLY DO LIKE IT WHEN I'M PISSED RIGHT THE FUCK OFF, DON'T YOU?
KARKAT: HIDING A TRUTH IN YOUR RUSE FOR ME LIKE A LITTLE FUCKING TREASURE HUNT? OR WERE YOU JUST GIVING ME SCRAPS LIKE YOU DON’T THINK I CAN HANDLE BEING STRAIGHT UP LIED TO? EITHER WAY, HOW VERY FUCKING CLEVER.
KARKAT: FINE. IF THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT, STRIDER, I WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO FUCKING OBLIGE.
DAVE: what the fuck
DAVE: stop
DAVE: dude im sorry
DAVE: you dont have to bite me or whatever i didnt know you had a whole thing
DAVE: we can keep it normal i didnt mean to make you question shit
DAVE: why are you questioning shit
Karkat blinks.
KARKAT: BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT YOU DO WHEN SOMEONE PITCH FLIRTS WITH YOU, DAVE.
DAVE: wait what
KARKAT: I’LL BE THE FIRST TO ADMIT THAT I HAVE NO CLUE HOW THE HUMAN EMOTION OF HATE WORKS. BUT IF THAT’S WHAT WE’RE DOING HERE, IT WOULD BE COMMON FUCKING COURTESY TO AT LEAST MAKE THAT SHIT CLEAR.
KARKAT: IT’S KIND OF WEIRD THAT YOU VACILLATED SO ABRUPTLY, BUT IF YOU WANT TO WEIRD HUMAN HATE ME I CAN NONWEIRD TROLL HATE YOU.
DAVE: hate me??
DAVE: hate you??
DAVE: vacillated??
DAVE: oh god oh fuck no not this alien hate fucking romance shit again
DAVE: karkat no i dont hate you what the fuck thats stupid
DAVE: i like you
DAVE: i just also happen to like the idea of you chewing up my neck a little bit
KARKAT: ...OH.
KARKAT: BUT THAT WOULD HURT YOU?
DAVE: well yeah maybe a little bit but thats fine just dont bite hard
DAVE: like dont draw blood and put me at an infection risk or any shit
KARKAT: THIS IS GOING TO MAKE MY THINK PAN EXPLODE. YOU DON'T HATE ME, AND YOU WANT ME TO HURT YOU JUST A LITTLE BIT?
KARKAT: IS THIS SHIT NORMAL FOR HUMANS?
DAVE: yeah dude getting your first bruise from someone elses mouth is like a rite of passage
DAVE: aside from that i dunno if its considered normal
DAVE: theres like whole human subcultures about liking being hurt during human sex its a whole thing
DAVE: but again like you really dont have to it if thats weird for trolls or whatever i know your whole shit is fucked up and needlessly complicated
KARKAT: HOW CULTURALLY SENSITIVE OF YOU, DAVE.
KARKAT: JUST FOR THE RECORD, AND FOR YOUR PERSONAL INFORMATION, THAT WOULD BE CONSIDERED MIXING QUADRANTS, WHICH IS CONSIDERED EXTREMELY TABOO.
KARKAT: VACILLATING; CHANGING FROM ONE QUADRANT TO ANOTHER? FROM FLUSHED TO PITCH ESPECIALLY? THAT'S PRETTY NORMALIZED, EVEN IF THE CHANGES ARE PRETTY RAPID.
KARKAT: BUT MIXING THEM? THAT KIND OF THING AT THE SAME TIME?
KARKAT: I MEAN, WOUNDING SOMEONE IS A DISTINCTIVELY PITCH ACTIVITY. DOING THAT WITH SOMEONE YOU HAVE MUTUAL FLUSHED FEELINGS FOR?
KARKAT: UM.
KARKAT: I MEAN.
KARKAT: WOW.
KARKAT: THAT'S.
Karkat blinks again.
KARKAT: THAT’S REALLY FUCKING HOT ACTUALLY.
DAVE: well dont fucking wound me
DAVE: but yeah okay im glad you think so
DAVE: well figure it out as we go i guess can you please just go back to macking on my neck that was really really nice
KARKAT: JEGUS YOU’RE IMPATIENT.
KARKAT: FORGIVE ME FOR ENSURING BARE FUCKING MINIMUM NEGOTIATIONS WERE HAD. I’M GOING TO START TAKING AWAY POINTS IF YOU KEEP COMPLAINING EVERY TIME I ATTEMPT TO BRIDGE A CULTURAL GAP FOR THE SAKE OF OUR GENERAL FUCKING WELLBEING.
DAVE: no not my points
DAVE: anything but my points
KARKAT: ANYTHING?
Praise whatever trolls have instead of God, his mouth is on your neck again. You feel his pointed smile against your skin, and the only thing that keeps you from whimpering in anticipation is the fact that whimpering is probably the least cool noise a guy can make.
You’re graced with exactly four open-mouthed, toothy kisses that trail from your collarbone to the top of your shoulder.
Then Karkat bites down, and his hand is back on your hip and kneading.
Dave: oh fuck
KARKAT: YOU REALLY DO LIKE THAT? JEGUS.
You both breathe heavily as he kisses and bites and sucks and nibbles, leaving a mess of marks across your shoulders. By the time he’s trailing kisses up your neck, you even let out a couple of those whimpers you had been holding back.
Fuck, you’re hard. You’re not sure if you hope he doesn’t notice yet, or if you’re praying that he does and takes pity on you.
That’s a troll thing, right? You remember Karkat saying something about pity blowjobs at some point, but to be so truly honest you probably weren’t really listening.
With one last kiss to your jaw, and another on your cheek, his lips make their way to pressing against yours again. He loops his hands around your shoulders in a way that feels like he’s asking you not to pull away, and you loop yours around his waist in a promise that you won’t.
How the fuck does kissing with tongue work?
You don’t have more than a second to contemplate it before Karkat’s teeth are poking and nibbling against your bottom lip, and you open your mouth on instinct as an equally instinctual moan rises from your throat. He seizes the opportunity, and just the tip of his tongue darts into your mouth to brush against yours experimentally.
Oh.
Okay, you can play ball, or hockey, or whatever sport it is you’re meant to be playing with another person’s tongue.
It starts off slow, but it doesn’t take very long for your makeouts to get absolutely sloppy. Confidence builds— and so does the tension in your already-tight jeans— as your lips press together only to punctuate the sliding of tongues. His fingers lace into your hair at the nape of your neck.
DAVE: pull
KARKAT: H
KARKAT: HUH?
DAVE: pull my hair?
His lips are on yours again, intensely, in a fervor. You feel careful claws brush against your scalp, and then his fist closes tightly in your hair.
Fuck, that’s way better than when you do it yourself, a million times better. You moan into his mouth again.
He urges you closer to him, pressing you against the wall. The tent in your pants is pressed into his stomach, and his hips press into your thigh.
You feel something down there writhe.
You know trolls have some supremely alien shit going on, but Jesus, feeling something squirm against your thigh is not something you knew how to prepare for.
DAVE: ill show you mine if you show me yours??
Karkat huffs— a sound that you’re choosing to believe is a laugh. His hands drop from your shoulders, but he traps you in another kiss. You’re thankful for the contact, as he leans the rest of his body away from you, and you lose the friction of his hips flush with yours.
The sound of hands on fabric draws your attention as his fingers curl around the tie at the waistband of his pajama pants, and he starts to pull it apart slowly. You want to keep swimming in closed eyes and dancing lips, but more than that, you want to look down at what he’s revealing. You can’t do anything but stare.
It feels like an eternity before the tie is done away with, and you see the waistband of black boxers. Below that, you can see swaying movement behind a wet circle. You can see it even in the dark room on dark fabric; he’s soaked through.
DAVE: need help with the rest?
You grin as he starts to hesitate under your watchful eye. He doesn’t get a chance to answer, as this time you lean in to press your lips to his, then against his jaw, his neck, his shoulder.
You have to crouch to kiss his collar bone, and that’s an easy transition to kissing down his chest as you kneel in front of him. Vibrations hit your lips as you do, and that chirring sound starts to feel more and more like he’s purring.
DAVE: youre like a lil pussy cat
DAVE: purring for me and shit
KARKAT: SHUT UP. MY VOCALIZATIONS OF CONTENTMENT ARE INSECTILE, NOT FELINE. THEY ARE NOTHING LIKE A MEOWBEAST’S PURRING. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
DAVE: aye aye captain
There are better things to do with your mouth right now anyway. You press an open-mouthed kiss just under where his belly button would be, if he had one. Above you, he rests his hands against the wall for stability. You take your time there, kissing and feeling up his hips and his grub scars again, and willfully ignoring the thing wiggling in his pants.
Eventually, your willfulness submits to your excitement to keep this ball rolling. You hook your thumbs into his pants to pull them down, and let him step out of them.
The whole front side of his boxers is a mess. He’s blushing down to his chest about it, as he kicks away his penultimate article of clothing.
You dip your fingers under the waistband of his boxers, and pull them down too.
Bright red, and huge.
The thing underneath, that had been squirming this whole time, reaches towards you in a rippling gesture.
Its tip is a fine point, the thickness of your pinky finger. Behind that is easily ten inches that just get wider. It’s segmented by four equidistant concave ridges, each section getting thicker and thicker until the final segment tapers off again at the root. The underside is textured and ribbed with swooping lines reminiscent of gills. If you wanted it in silicone, you’d need to go to a shady looking website and drop a benjamin on it. Probably more than one, actually.
It glistens in the dim light, and you swear to fuck that up close the heady smell has an undernote of cherries. Not an artificial cherry, there’s no chemical sweetness— it’s subtle and tart and bright with a more rich sweetness.
You just sit on your knees and stare at it for a minute, watching it wiggle like a snake that’s sizing you up. When you snap out of it, you rub your thumbs in circles over the curve of Karkat’s hipbones to psych yourself up to try to handle this thing in the least stupid way possible.
Thankfully, Karkat takes one of your hands and guides it to the base. Despite the differences in size and aforementioned sensory experiences, it’s familiar.
DAVE: like this?
You check, sliding your hand slowly up towards the thin tip.
KARKAT: YEAH.
KARKAT: JUST LIKE THAT, FUCK.
DAVE: and this?
Now you’re just teasing him, honestly. You grin as you slide your hand back down.
KARKAT: YOU ARE THE SINGULAR WORST.
KARKAT: IF YOU INSIST ON ASKING FOR FEEDBACK, MORE LIKE THIS.
His tone is harsh, but his touch isn’t. He holds your wrist and guides you to twist as you stroke him. You fall into the rhythm of it, your hand sliding across the bottom on the downstroke and twisting your attention to the top as you work towards the tip. It fights your grasp, wiggling and twisting in on itself to chase your hand.
Once you get the hang of it, he lets go of your wrist and goes back to leaning against the wall.
KARKAT: FUCK. YES. GOOD. THAT’S REALLY FUCKING GOOD.
His voice is all passion and husk. You grin up at him and lean in, holding your hand near the tip to hold the appendage still enough to get it into your mouth. He watches with parted lips, his heavy breaths turning into a quiet moan. You take the pointed tip between your lips and suck gently, mostly just to keep it from writhing back out.
It doesn’t taste quite as sweet as it smells, but the slick settles onto your tongue pleasantly as you continue to take in the olfactory hint of cherry with every nervous breath.
Your lips open wider to take him deeper, chasing your hand down its length. You slide past the first ridge easily, and you feel the tip start to prod around. It strokes the roof of your mouth, and presses into your tongue, and it’s maybe the weirdest thing you’ve ever felt.
You kinda like it.
Feeling ambitious, you sink down further. Your lips settle around the second ridge, and then over it. His bulge wiggles, and the way it jabs the back of your throat makes you gag. You come off him with a sputter and a pop.
Fuck, that’s embarassing. You only took half of it.
KARKAT: JEGUS DAVE, ARE YOU OKAY?
You don’t dignify the question with an answer, other than wrapping your lips around him and trying again.
KARKAT: OH FUCK.
His hips buck as you take it back into your mouth, and you feel his tip squirming into the depths again. It pushes against the back of your throat before you’re ready, making you choke again with another embarrassing sputter.
KARKAT: FUCK THAT ONE WAS MY FAULT, I’M SORRY.
KARKAT: YOUR MOUTH IS JUST...
KARKAT: FUCK.
DAVE: good enough that youre trying to choke me to death with your bulge?
DAVE: its cool im good
DAVE: im just still getting used to it moving around like that
KARKAT: DOES YOURS NOT MOVE?
DAVE: no dude absolutely not
KARKAT: ...
KARKAT: LET ME SEE?
You’re a little disappointed to abandon Project: Alien Blowjob after such a pathetic attempt, but not disappointed enough to refuse a request like that. You stand up again carefully, still very much pinned between Karkat and the wall. Nerves start to swell in your chest. Once you’re back up at your full height, you hesitate.
Karkat takes over, dropping to his knees in front of you and starting to unbutton your pants.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Your hands shake at your sides. You pray he doesn’t notice.
He doesn’t seem to notice, or at least he isn’t making a big deal out of it. Slowly at first, the tension in your jeans eases away as he pulls down the zipper tooth by tooth. He then yanks at the fabric of both your jeans and your boxers to take them down your legs. You step out of it as gracefully as you can, putting a hand on his shoulder to keep you steady. You feel the way his chest is still vibrating beneath your touch.
KARKAT: JEGUS FUCKING CHRIST STRIDER WHAT IS THAT THING?
DAVE: be nice dude youre gonna give a guy a complex
KARKAT: RIGHT, RIGHT, SORRY, FUCK.
KARKAT: BUT I MEAN SERIOUSLY, WHAT…?
He’s familiar enough to default to the motion of wrapping his hand around your shaft, and it pulses against his fingers as a quiet groan escapes your lips with the first euphoric touch.
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK?
He pulls his hand away, and you resist the urge to press your hips forward to chase it in disappointment.
KARKAT: YOU SAID YOURS DIDN’T MOVE?
DAVE: because it fucking doesnt?
DAVE: you think a lil twitch counts when its up against the thing your hentai fantasy schlong does?
KARKAT: ABSOLUTELY YES, IF IT IS UNDER THE PRECURSOR OF BEING TOLD THAT IT DOESN’T MOVE?
KARKAT: DO IT AGAIN.
DAVE: what??
KARKAT: MAKE IT MOVE LIKE THAT AGAIN, I WANT TO SEE.
DAVE: okay sure i guess
You do as you’re told, and make it twitch with a little bounce.
KARKAT: IT'S SO RIGID?
KARKAT: DO YOU…
KARKAT: DO YOU WANT ME TO PUT IT IN MY MOUTH?
DAVE: oh god
DAVE: like
DAVE: yes
DAVE: but please for the love of all that is plush be so fucking careful with your teeth
KARKAT: I THOUGHT YOU LIKED IT WHEN I HURT YOU JUST A LITTLE BIT?
DAVE: this is what is referred to as a no-no zone
DAVE: absolutely no cbt in the bedroom
DAVE: thats a thing that means both a kind of human therapy and a human fetish for feeling the ouchies on your cock and balls
DAVE: its funny i promise but also im dead serious about your teeth
DAVE: the little razors in your mouth plus my penis equals
DAVE: like
DAVE: ankle in a fucking honey thief trap
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
DAVE: i dunno i was trying to guess what stupid shit youd call a bear DAVE: im talking about a bear trap
KARKAT: I DIDN'T LAND ON EARTH FUCKING YESTERDAY. I KNOW WHAT A BEAR TRAP IS BY NOW, YOU ABSOLUTE IDIOT.
KARKAT: FOR CLARITY, YOU DO, IN FACT, WANT ME TO PUT YOUR COCK AND BALLS IN MY URSINEBEAST INCAPACITATOR OF A MOUTH?
DAVE: ursine beast motherfucker i wasnt even close but i could have gotten that one
KARKAT: MOTHERFUCKER. GOING ONCE?
DAVE: WAIT yes
DAVE: oh fuck yes
DAVE: sorry
DAVE: no more talking i get it ill stop yapping
KARKAT: ... NO, NO, IT’S NOT THAT. SORRY, IT’S OKAY, I PROMISE.
KARKAT: I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW AND WHY YOU KEEP INSISTING ON INTERRUPTING THE CURATION OF A MOOD WITH THE MOST ASININE BULLFUCKERY, WHEN ALL OF THIS WAS YOUR IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE?
KARKAT: I MEAN TEN MINUTES AGO YOU WERE ESSENTIALLY BEGGING TO BE ALL FUCKING OVER ME, AND NOW YOU WANT TO, WHAT, SIT HERE WITH OUR BULGES OUT AND TALK ABOUT BEARS?
KARKAT: IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU?
KARKAT: I MEAN... FUCK.
KARKAT: IS SOMETHING WRONG?
DAVE: ...
DAVE: cant a guy be nervous about another guy putting his dick in his mouth for the first time
KARKAT: YOU CAN BE NERVOUS ALL THE FUCK YOU WANT, BUT HAVE YOU CONSIDERED JUST TELLING ME THAT? USING YOUR HUMAN GOD FORSAKEN WORDS TO TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS, INSTEAD OF GOING ON A TANGENT ABOUT BEAR TRAPS?
DAVE: guess i could do that hypothetically speaking
DAVE: yeah
DAVE: yeah ill do that im cool now
DAVE: do it before i change my mind
KARKAT: ONLY YOU COULD MAKE THAT STATEMENT AN UPGRADE IN TERMS OF SEDUCTION.
He complains, but he wraps his hand around you again where you’ve started to go soft with nerves.
KARKAT: IT’S LESS RIGID NOW… IS THERE A REASON FOR THAT?
DAVE: oh jegus
DAVE: no its fine just me being nervous i guess
DAVE: keep doing that and im sure the little guy will perk right back up
God, you feel stupid.
Nevertheless, he nods, looking up at you through his eyelashes. You let out a shaky breath as you watch him start to work you in his hand.
DAVE: s
DAVE: squeeze a little tighter
KARKAT: SQUEEZE?
DAVE: fuck ow dude no not that hard
DAVE: i said a little
DAVE: like
You take his hand in yours, and close your eyes.
You focus on the feeling, your hand over his to provide just the right pressure. The tightness of his fist and the pace you set is obviously just like your own, but something about the fact that it’s his hand sliding up and down your length sends your mind for a loop. It would be awkward, if it wasn’t really fucking hot actually, feeling like you’re using his hand to jack yourself off.
Your eyes are still closed. You distantly hear him shuffle a bit in front of you as you get a little carried away with his hand, still held tightly in your own.
You aren’t expecting that shuffling to have been him moving closer to you. He’s suddenly close enough that you feel the warmth and wetness of his tongue under the ridge of your tip, sensitive and euphoric as a back stroke pulls back your foreskin.
DAVE: oh fuck
You open your eyes to see his other hand moving up and down his own bright-red, leaking bulge, while his dark-grey tongue swirls and laps at yours.
DAVE: oh
DAVE: oh fuck
Karkat looks up at you with purpose in his eyes, and carefully opens his mouth.
DAVE: ngh fuck
The warm, wet feeling overcomes your other senses as he carefully takes you past his lips. His tongue and lips shield you from his teeth, and he sits still and lets you use his hand to jack yourself off into his mouth.
DAVE: su- ah-
DAVE: suck a little bit
Karkat nudges your hand away from guiding him, and he keeps up the pressure, but slows down the pace a little.
Your hands find his feather-soft hair, and tense up with restraint. You want to grab at his locks and move his head up and down, back and forth, anywhere to chase this feeling. Unfortunately, the ursinebeast incapacitator behind his soft lips keeps your restraint ironclad, and shaking, letting nothing but your fingertips press against his scalp.
The wet sounds below you harmonize, as Karkat fists his own bulge and sucks gently at the tip of yours.
Your tip touches the hard palate of Karkat’s mouth, and your hips buck. Karkat takes it in stride, letting you rut further, deeper, tip against his soft palate now. He sucks, and fists everything not in his mouth in time with his other hand. It’s painfully slow, his hand covering all ten inches of himself in the time it takes him to thrust up and down on maybe the bottom three of your own.
Your ironclad restraint is grazed by a haphazard fang. It’s not nearly as bad as you thought it would be. You’re aware that they’re sharp, but without any pressure or bite behind them, they’re just another sensation in the heat of Karkat’s mouth. You still try to avoid them, but you aren’t scared of feeling the ouchies anymore. You start to thrust, letting your palms cradle his head.
You can tell he’s still being mindful of his chompers as well, which you appreciate. He sucks, and bobs, and laps. His hand picks up the pace over everything he can't fit into his mouth, but then it disappears entirely.
The tip of his nose touches the skin at your pelvis, and you are so deep in his mouth now— in his throat, as deep as you can go— and he’s bobbing back up, and back down again.
He gets points for this. Project: Alien Blowjob is a success beyond your wildest imagination, even if you had to end up on the other end of things to make it happen.
Do trolls not have a gag reflex?
Oh fuck you’re about to-
DAVE: oh fuck karkat im gonna
He comes off you with a pop, a strand of saliva keeping his lips connected to where you need them most. His hand returns, firm and fast and making absolutely debaucherous sounds with what he left behind from his mouth.
KARKAT: WHERE DO YOU WANT TO-?
KARKAT: OH JEGUS.
You didn’t stand a chance of holding on long enough to answer that question, let alone let him finish it. Your hips buckle and you feel yourself pulse. Hot liquid white shoots onto his cheek. Another pulse makes a mess down the grey skin of his chest, and another, and then you’re dribbling down his hand.
DAVE: fffuck
Karkat watches you in awe, and slows his hand to a stop, then he pulls away. He does his best to wipe the cum off of his cheek and chest, and stares down at the mess left behind on his hands.
KARKAT: YOU SHOT ME?
DAVE: in my defense i tried to warn you
KARKAT: NO, NO, IT’S FINE, I’M JUST SURPRISED? MINE DOESN’T REALLY DO THAT? I ASSUMED THE LITTLE HOLE ON THE END WAS YOUR FLAP, BUT… IT ALL CAME OUT SO FAST? IT WENT SO FAR? YOU FUCKING SHOT ME?
DAVE: do you want me to say sorry or?
DAVE: cus i mean if youre out for vengeance i think we could work something out
DAVE: maybe even get comfortable about it
DAVE: unless you were planning to stuff and mount me on the wall
DAVE: oh fuck
Your post nut wave of light exhaustion is laced with awe as you watch Karkat lick his hand, tasting you off of his own skin with curiosity.
KARKAT: BLEH!
KARKAT: WHY IS IT SALTY?
DAVE: man again with the being nice and the giving a guy a complex
DAVE: thats just what it tastes like
DAVE: its made of fucking eukaryotic cells and like acids and shit
DAVE: you expected that to taste good?
KARKAT: I’M SORRY, DID YOU SAY FUCKING ACID? YOU SHOT ME WITH ACID? YOU EJACULATE ACID?
DAVE: dont be dramatic its not really that kind of acid
KARKAT: OH, AS LONG AS IT’S NOT REALLY THAT KIND OF ACID.
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN NOT REALLY?
DAVE: well shit dude i dont know if you know this but all acids are acids thats just the word for the thing that it is
DAVE: but its like lactic acid or something
DAVE: like you find that shit in yogurt its fine
KARKAT: HUMAN YOGURT IS REPULSIVE, SO THIS MAKES A LOT OF SENSE ACTUALLY.
DAVE: ok mean
DAVE: what does your cum taste like then
DAVE: if youre gonna sit here acting like his royal tastiness
KARKAT: WANT TO FIND OUT?
Fuck yes you do. Karkat stands, and your lips crash into each other. You barely even mind it when you find the taste of yourself on his tongue. You had been a little worried. Apple juice is usually the closest thing you get to eating a vegetable, and that probably wasn't doing you any favors, but he was just being a big baby; you taste fine.
In a hurricane of messy kisses and fondling hands, he guides you across his room. The two of you land in a pile of pillows and blankets.
You know that a pile is supposed to be used for much less salacious activities, but Karkat is the one who guided you there— and you still don’t entirely understand the platonic intimacy of being in a pile anyway— so you barely even think to question it.
KARKAT: I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD LET YOU KNOW BEFORE THIS GOES ANY FURTHER...
KARKAT: I’M NOT REALLY A FAN OF ANYTHING GOING INSIDE MY NOOK.
DAVE: your what
KARKAT: MY NOOK? DO YOU FUCKING NOT KNOW WHAT A NOOK IS?
DAVE: no i know how troll shit works
DAVE: or at least i thought i did
DAVE: what do you mean you have a nook i literally just had your bulge in my mouth?
KARKAT: FUCKING???
KARKAT: YOU HAD MY BULGE IN YOUR MOUTH AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE MY NOOK?
DAVE: woah?
You’re hovering over Karkat in the pile, and you shift yourself downwards to get a look at him again. His legs are parted enough that— sure as shit— you see translucent red beads dripping down over the lips and folds of a nook under his wiggling bulge. You try to keep your gaze as respectful as possible, and process the thing he just said to you.
DAVE: i guess i did not
DAVE: so uh
DAVE: thats a nono zone?
KARKAT: JEGUS FUCKING...
KARKAT: SURE, I GUESS A TERM THAT YOU COULD USE TO DESCRIBE MY GENERAL PREFERENCES AND COMFORT VIS A VIS MY NOOK, WOULD BE TO REFER TO IT AS- AND I QUOTE- A NO-NO ZONE.
DAVE: heard
DAVE: thats okay thanks for telling me
DAVE: if anything uh
DAVE: i always imagined myself bottoming in this scenario anyway
KARKAT: YOU IMAGINED YOURSELF IN THIS SCENARIO?
DAVE: oh absolutely yes
KARKAT: GLAD TO KNOW IT WASN’T JUST ME, THEN.
KARKAT: BUT UH...
KARKAT: WHAT IS BOTTOMING?
DAVE: oh dude
DAVE: uh so you know
DAVE: fuck where do i even start
DAVE: basically there has to be a word for who gets fucked and who does the fucking when the sex youre having is kind of fucking gay
KARKAT: OH, THE INSERTIARY LEGATEE AND THE PENETRATIVE ALMONER.
DAVE: fucking sure i guess
KARKAT: HOW...WOULD THAT WORK EXACTLY?|
DAVE: dude have you like never watched human porn
KARKAT: FUCKING NO?
KARKAT: YOU SAY THAT LIKE IT ISN’T BLATANTLY OBVIOUS THAT YOU ARE THE FURTHEST POSSIBLE THING FROM AN EXPERT ON TROLL PORNOGRAPHY.
DAVE: sorry too busy watching human porn i guess
DAVE: i actually have seen some troll stuff before
DAVE: i also actually dont want to talk about how stupid it was that i didnt realize you have a nook
DAVE: im choosing to believe that i somehow psychically knew that you fancy yourself more of a penetrative almoner
DAVE: and so i blocked that shit out intentionally for your comfort
KARKAT: DO HUMANS ALSO SAY PENETRATIVE ALMONER? I EXPECTED IT TO BE SOME STUPID SHIT LIKE “TOP”
DAVE: god damn it thats a point for you
KARKAT: FUCKING SERIOUSLY? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? YOU’RE ABOUT TO BE THE INSERTIARY LEGATEE, AND YOU’RE LITERALLY ON TOP OF ME RIGHT NOW? THAT IS SO INCOMPREHENSIBLY NONSENSICALLY FUCKING STUPID?
DAVE: im about to be the insertiary legatee huh?
KARKAT: I MEAN YES, IF YOU WANT TO, AS SOON AS YOU TELL ME HOW THAT FUCKING WORKS IF YOU DON’T HAVE A NOOK?
DAVE: come on
DAVE: is the hole math really that hard to work out?
KARKAT: ...?
KARKAT: THERE IS NO WAY THAT’S PHYSICALLY COMFORTABLE, LET ALONE ENJOYABLE?
DAVE: actually that is the exact spot where god hid mans pleasure button
DAVE: you kinda have to work for it though so actually its probably a good thing you havent seen any human porn
DAVE: that shit makes it look way too easy even for other other humans
DAVE: and your dick is huge and weird
KARKAT: WEIRD?
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO BEING NICE AND NOT GIVING EACH OTHER COMPLEXES?
DAVE: you started it
KARKAT: THAT’S...FAIR. SO, HOW DO I GET THIS STARTED THEN?
DAVE: well usually it starts with lube, i dont suppose you have any of that?
KARKAT: NO, BUT IF IT’S FOR WHAT I THINK IT IS, I THINK TROLLS SOMETIMES USE SOPOR?
DAVE: ew no
KARKAT: ONE AGAIN, YOUR CULTURAL SENSITIVITY IS UNPARALLELED. IF WE’RE BEING COMPLETELY HONEST THOUGH, I KIND OF AGREE WITH YOU. I UM... I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA.
Karkat lowers a hand down his torso, and you watch with rapt attention as he drags his fingers along the folds of his nook and works his palm up his shaft. When he’s done, his hand is covered in translucent cherry red, almost pink over his grey skin.
DAVE: fuck
DAVE: yeah okay
KARKAT: WHAT NOW?
DAVE: can you like
DAVE: trim your claws at all?
KARKAT: YOU COULDN’T HAVE ASKED ME THAT BEFORE I GOT MY GEN-MAT ALL OVER MY HAND?
You and Karkat do a whole song and dance. You lay down in the pile, while he manages his claw situation. Soon, you’re back where you started, but in reversed positions.
You tuck your knees to your chest, and something about it makes you feel vulnerable. It’s a weirdly sexy kind of vulnerability, though. It affirms that if there’s anyone that you want to be vulnerable like this with, it’s Karkat.
He starts to work you open with his first finger, and you know to relax instinctually. He’s attentive to your winces and hisses while he figures out a comfortable pace. You do this enough on your own; it doesn’t take long before he’s working his whole first finger in and out of you. Your hisses turn to quiet moans as his finger starts to slide easily, finger-fucking you with his own genetic material.
DAVE: you can probably add a second finger now
DAVE: youre gonna have to slow down again though
KARKAT: ALRIGHT, DO YOU ALSO WANT ME TO…?
He gestures at where your dick is laying rock hard against your stomach.
DAVE: are you trying to make me cum again before we get to the good part?
KARKAT: COULD I? CAN YOU? IS YOUR REFRACTORY PERIOD THAT SHORT?
DAVE: jesus dont sound so surprised
KARKAT: OH, YOUR FRAGILE HUMAN COMPLEXES, MY MOST HUMBLE APOLOGIES.
His usual sarcasm hits very differently with the tips of his first and second fingers pressing into you. You laugh, and you realize that you’re thankfully feeling sober enough to really enjoy this, but drunk enough to let a moan escape your lips before you reply.
DAVE: hey man you cant bring up your complexes and then go dunking on me for mine
KARKAT: I THINK I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT, IN OUR CURRENT POSITION.
His other hand wraps around your shaft, and he holds it tightly at the base without moving.
DAVE: oh fuck
KARKAT: YOU LIKE THAT?
DAVE: pretty much yeah
He gives you an annoyed look, and lets go.
KARKAT: WELL, IF YOU ONLY ‘PRETTY MUCH’ LIKE IT, THEN WHAT’S THE POINT?
DAVE: dude no fuck you
DAVE: you want me to say i like it?
KARKAT: I DO.
DAVE: okay okay i like it
DAVE: do it again
DAVE: please
DAVE: happy?
KARKAT: VERY.
Karkat returns his hand to the base of your shaft, but his other hand leaves you for a devastating moment. He gathers more of his genetic material from the gills on the underside of his own shaft before both of his hands are on you again, applying pressure from both ends.
You feel the difference the extra fluid makes when he slips two fingers into you past the first knuckle.
DAVE: ungh fuck
DAVE: do this
You let go of one of your legs for a moment to gesture a scissor motion.
KARKAT: LIKE THIS?
DAVE: oh fuck yes
DAVE: the thing youre trying to do here is stretch me out so that i can fit that monster inside me without it hurting
DAVE: thatll help and it feels nice
KARKAT: ANY OTHER TIPS?
DAVE: uh
DAVE: yeah once youve got your fingers in there
DAVE: a motion like this will help you press that pleasure button i mentioned
You curl your fingers in a come-hither motion.
KARKAT: IS IT ACTUALLY CALLED A PLEASURE BUTTON?
DAVE: no its called a prostate but dont call it that when were up in each others business like this
DAVE: its like clinical and weird i dunno
DAVE: pleasure button is also weird to be fair
DAVE: i dunno talking about it isnt the thing that its for, its for making you cum
KARKAT: SO YOU DO WANT ME TO MAKE YOU CUM AGAIN?
DAVE: i mean that would be pretty cool i think
DAVE: but i would also like to survive actually getting to fuck you
DAVE: so like be gentle i guess but the thing youre doing with your hand on my dick is helping
KARKAT: IT IS? HOW? I HONESTLY JUST STARTED DOING IT CUS THAT’S HOW YOU GET A BULGE TO STAY PUT WHEN YOU’RE TRYING TO… WELL, YOU KNOW, NOOK STUFF.
DAVE: well thats where cum comes from
DAVE: kinda
DAVE: man can we have the mechanics talk after?
DAVE: i want you inside me already
KARKAT: MY, MY, STRIDER, HOW YOU CHANGE WHEN SUDDENLY YOU’RE THE ONE WHO WANTS SOMETHING.
DAVE: shut up
KARKAT: CRISPRANGE HEATING DEVICE, MEET WHISTLING HEATING DEVICE.
DAVE: what the fuck does that even mean?
KARKAT: DO YOU REALLY WANT ME TO ANSWER THAT, OR DO YOU WANT ME TO FINISH STRETCHING YOUR HOLE SO THAT I CAN PUT MY BULGE INSIDE OF YOU?
DAVE: uh the second one
KARKAT: SAY IT.
DAVE: what dude i just did dont make me do it again
KARKAT: THAT WASN’T AN ADMISSION OF WANT, IT WAS AN IMPATIENT COMPLAINT AT BEST. TELL ME YOU WANT IT, DAVE.
DAVE: fine
DAVE: i want you to stretch me out and put your bulge in me
DAVE: jesus shit thats embarrassing
KARKAT: IS IT?
DAVE: no? i guess?
DAVE: just you making me say it like that
KARKAT: DO YOU WANT ME TO STOP?
DAVE: …
DAVE: no its kinda hot honestly
KARKAT: IT IS?
DAVE: yeah it is
KARKAT: IS THAT LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN THING, FOR VULNERABILITY TO BE AROUSING?
DAVE: man kinda i guess, dont make me unpack my issues through the lens of a humiliation kink i told you no cbt in the bedroom
KARKAT: HUMILIATION? IS THAT WHAT I’M DOING WHEN I TELL YOU TO SAY STUFF? IT MAKES YOU FEEL HUMILIATED?
DAVE: with your fingers all up inside of me yeah
DAVE: shits embarrassing and thats basically the same thing
KARKAT: GOG... YOU ARE PERFECT.
DAVE: what
KARKAT: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HOT THAT IS DAVE? HOW HOT THIS IS? TALKING ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS IN A PILE, WITH MY FINGERS INSIDE OF YOU, AND THAT THE ACT OF GETTING YOU TO TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS IS SOMETHING THAT MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE I’M HUMILIATING YOU? AND THAT’S AROUSING TO YOU IN A WAY THAT YOU ENJOY?
KARKAT: THAT’S ALL THREE QUADRANTS THAT ARE POSSIBLE TO HIT IN THIS SCENARIO, FROM A COUPLE DIFFERENT ANGLES.
KARKAT: HOW LONG DOES HOLE STRETCHING TAKE? GOG, NOW I’M FEELING IMPATIENT.
DAVE: oh shit do you have like
DAVE: a quadrant kink?
KARKAT: FUCK YOU, SO WHAT IF I DO??? ARE YOU GOING TO FUCKING HUMAN JUDGE ME NOW, DAVE?
You think.
You smile.
DAVE: if i did would that turn you on in three quadrants at once?
KARKAT: FUCK YOU, DAVE.
DAVE: any way you want me vantas
He’s up to the second knuckle of his fingers now, and he thrusts and scissors them inside of you. Your eyes close blissfully, and you let your mouth fall open into a couple of quiet moans. There’s another retreat to gather more genetic material, and a little bit more work, before he’s pressing a third finger up against your hole. He goes a little too fast again, clearly getting a little too excited, and it makes you wince.
He adjusts, retreating to just the tips of his fingers and sliding them around your entrance before trying again. Three fingers is about the most you’ve ever taken width-wise on your own, so it feels like bliss when they slide in and give you that feeling of being stretched and full. You can only imagine what his bulge is going to feel like, and oh god you’re imagining it.
His fingers curl against your prostate, or your pleasure button, or whatever the fuck you can call it that doesn’t sound bizarre in some way. No matter what you call it, you feel a wave of euphoria, made even better by the fact that it’s Karkat’s fingers making you feel like that. You want him to start moving the hand that’s still holding the base of your shaft, but that feels like a dangerous game. You can be patient.
Or…
DAVE: okay i think im good now
DAVE: if you wanna
DAVE: you know
KARKAT: JEGUS FUCK YES, YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA.
He pulls his fingers out of you slowly, and you feel yourself hold their shape for a moment even after they’re gone. You watch his expression as he sees it too, and he looks back up at you in awe.
KARKAT: IS THAT… WILL IT DO THAT WITH MY BULGE TOO?
DAVE: probably
KARKAT: I TAKE BACK ANY INITIAL SPECULATION I HAD. PRAISE HUMAN GOD FOR PUTTING YOUR PLEASURE BUTTON THERE.
DAVE: we can praise god while you’re inside me
DAVE: come here already
KARKAT: FUCK, YES.
You shift to get extra comfortable in the pile and adjust your hold on your legs, while Karkat’s hands steady his bulge’s squirming and he lines his hips up with yours.
It feels kind of weird immediately. The prehensile tip easily slides past your entrance, presumably heat seeking. It moves in all directions in a way that fingers and silicone notably don’t, pushing against your walls and making it easier for Karkat to slide himself slowly into you until you feel the first ridge.
DAVE: oh fuck
DAVE: fuck you feel so good already what the fuck
KARKAT: FUCK, YOU TOO.
DAVE: you too?
DAVE: really?
DAVE: all that fuss about making me use my big boy words and that’s the best youve got?
KARKAT: SHUT THE FUCK UP.
DAVE: ...
DAVE: make me vantas
You see a flash of something in his eyes, and he lets out a shaky exhale as he pushes further into you past the first ridge of his bulge straight down to the second one. It pulls a loud moan out of you, and certainly shuts you up.
You’ve felt something similar to this before with a set of beads you have, but this is better in every conceivable way.
The expression Karkat has on his face is something you wish you could keep on the inside of your eyes to just stare at whenever you wanted to. His hair is messier than usual, which is an impressive feat on its own. His eyes are already glassy with desire, and his parted lips beg to be pressed against yours. Or, at least you’re desperate enough to see it that way.
DAVE: kiss me
Karkat complies without a word, leaning himself over you, and finding a place to hold himself up against the pile with one hand. The other settles on your thigh just below your own hand. He squeezes it gently, and starts to push his bulge into you again past the second ridge as his lips press against yours.
There’s that feeling again, full. It feels so fucking good. He feels so fucking good. You get lost in kissing him, and can hardly manage the thought that this is only half of the full length of what he’s trying to put inside of you.
He must feel that you’re close to the limit of what you can take right now, because he starts to pull out again just as slowly. You moan against his tongue when you feel the ridges against your entrance, and he returns the noise with a shaky moan of his own.
Fuck, that’s hot. You want to hear it again.
When he slides back into you, you thrust your hips to meet his. He sings out that perfect noise, just like you hoped.
His bulge slithers inside you when he settles down to the third ridge, and you break from your kiss to tilt your head back in a breathy moan as the tip prods at just the right spot.
KARKAT: RIGHT THERE?
DAVE: fuck yes right there fuck
Karkat closes his eyes, a focused expression taking over his face as he thrusts into you, and his bulge curls to hit that sweet spot again.
DAVE: unh fuck
DAVE: if theres any hope of you getting all the way inside me before i fuckin bust were gonna have to switch things up a little
You guide him to switch spots with you, his back now laid against the plush pile while your knees bracket his hips. A moan escapes his parted lips as you take his squirming bulge into your hand, and guide it back to your entrance. You slide down onto it easily, both of you still dripping with his genetic material.
You’re familiar with this maneuver, bucking your hips and rising onto your knees to work yourself downwards— though usually it’s onto something suctioned to the floor of your shower or pinned beneath you on your bed.
Every way that this is different is pure bliss. Everything from staring down into lust-filled red eyes that probably match your own; feeling the way he squirms inside of you to match your every movement; your hands planted firmly on the velvet skin of his abdomen.
Every thrust downwards punches a heavy breath out of your chest. His hands grip your hips, holding you steady and letting you set the pace. You feel his claws bite your skin, deeper and more piercing on the hand that he didn’t trim. It pulls a whimper out of you as you roll your hips and feel his hold tighten, sharp points digging into the meat of your ass.
KARKAT: FUCK, STRIDER, YOU’RE GOOD AT THIS.
DAVE: you too
You mock him, and it doesn’t go unnoticed. Karkat makes a noise not unlike a growl. The sound makes a heat pool in your guts where you’re already feeling stirred, but you answer him with a smug laugh. It pisses him off further, which is exactly what you were going for.
You see the way his jaw tightens as he clenches his teeth, and you feel the sting of his piercing claws as he takes more purchase in your hips and starts to buck up into you. Your head swims thinking about the marks that’ll leave.
DAVE: oh FUCK
You moan loudly as you settle around the fourth and final ridge, more than three quarters of his length inside you now— by your calculations. Karkat breathes heavily as you pause your thrusts, now just rolling your hips right where you are a couple of times to adjust.
KARKAT: TOO MUCH?
DAVE: no way theres still a couple inches to go isnt there?
Karkat looks down at where your bodies are joined together, and you watch him visibly swoon.
KARKAT: I MEAN YES BUT DON’T-
DAVE: shut up i want to
DAVE: i want all of you inside me so fucking bad
Karkat moans in reply.
KARKAT: WELL THEN TAKE IT, STRIDER.
You grin, and get your hips moving again. You take his wrists in your hands and guide them off your hips, putting one on your chest and leading the other to grip the base of your shaft again. He follows along, applying a gentle pressure to your shaft and gliding a thumb over your nipple.
His hips buck to meet your every thrust, and soon enough your hips are flush with his. Once he’s fully inside of you, every ridge and writhing bump, you start to feel overwhelmed. The pace you set is punishing, your hips slapping down against his.
You take his wrist in your hand again, guiding it from where it had been pinching against your nipple to bring it up to your cheek.
He cups it tenderly at first, sliding his thumb over the round apple of your cheek, before he gives you exactly what you were asking for— even if you didn’t exactly ask with so many words.
He pulls his hand away from your cheek, and you feel yourself tense up with anticipation. You clench around him, and he moans before he brings his hand back to your cheek with a gentle pap.
DAVE: harder
You plea, you beg, and he complies. It leaves a gentle sting on your cheek as heat rises to meet the impact. You moan, absolutely blissed out by the feeling.
DAVE: oh fuck yes
You bring your hips down at just the wrong angle when his bulge slithers in just the wrong direction.
KARKAT: OW! FUCK.
DAVE: shit sorry
DAVE: you ok?
KARKAT: YEAH, YEAH I'M FINE. FUCK.
KARKAT: DON'T STOP- KEEP GOING.
He moves his hands back to your hips, and you work up your rhythm again. Your legs are starting to hurt, but everything else feels too good to stop.
Fuck, everything feels really, really good. There's a chill up your spine, the muscles in your legs tense, warmth starts to climb up your torso, you feel a familiar tension in your groin.
DAVE: oh fuck im gonna-
KARKAT: FUCK, ME TOO.
His hips knock upwards against yours. You feel something flare inside you, stretching you ever so slightly wider as genetic material spills into you and shoots out of you in messy tandem.
Karkat moans loudly and you echo his cry with a whimper as you watch beads of pearly white shoot across his chest. You look down to find a mess of translucent red, spilling out of you enough that you can feel a drip trail down one of your thighs.
You let out a shaky exhale and start to shift yourself to get off of him.
KARKAT: WAIT.
KARKAT: MY BULGE FLAPS ARE STILL OPEN, PLEASE DON'T GET OFF YET.
DAVE: wh-?
Another pulse of fluid shoots inside you and spills out down your thighs.
DAVE: oh fuck
You're spent, bordering on overstimulation, but you're determined to take everything he can give you.
KARKAT: JUST ONE MORE.
KARKAT: FUCK, YOUR NOOK IS SO TIGHT.
KARKAT: JEGUS THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN A BUCKET, I'VE NEVER BEEN SO ANGRY AT THE EXISTENCE OF BUCKETS.
DAVE: my nook huh?
KARKAT: YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
Thankfully, you do. A third pulse of fluid empties inside you, and Karkat chirrs loudly. Your thighs and your hands quiver as you lean yourself down to rest against his chest, basking in it for just a moment longer before you really start to feel overwhelmed by how he’s still squirming inside you.
KARKAT: OKAY, OKAY YOU’RE GOOD NOW.
DAVE: thank god
You slide off of him, moaning as every ridge catches with a wave of overstimulating pleasure. His gen-mat leaks out of you, making a mess of your thighs, and you feel your own cum on your chest from where you laid down against him.
DAVE: one more in the shower?
KARKAT: WE JUST FINISHED AND YOU WANT TO GO AGAIN ALREADY? SERIOUSLY, A REFRACTORY PERIOD LIKE THAT SHOULD BE FUCKING ILLEGAL.
DAVE: i was kind of joking but i seriously do need a shower
KARKAT: YEAH, A SHOWER SOUNDS NICE.
DAVE: you sound nice
KARKAT: SHUT THE FUCK UP.