Chapter Text
Mydei had always loathed bothersome things.
As a Chrysos Heir and sole leader of the Kremnoan Detachment, he was someone who carried a ginormous amount of responsibilities on his back. That meant he absolutely despised wasting valuable time being ineffective.
It was easy for him to recall moments when the Council of Elders denied vital plans to protect Okhema just to spite the Chrysos Heirs. Or when his fellow Kremnoans would refuse to cooperate with Okheman soldiers due to petty disagreements.
It was those types of situations that irked Mydei beyond reasonable measure. When people purposefully impeded progress because of their own opinions and agendas, how could he not lose his temper at their stupidity? Too many times had Mydei seen how emotions could make people act irrationally.
Despite all that, Mydei never saw Phainon as a bother.
Yes, he'd serve as a distraction most times in the form of a chatterbox and he'd often rush into anything without a second thought (both on the battlefield and off), leaving Mydei to clean up the messes he'd make.
But ultimately, the Deliverer was a comrade who also valued good work ethic. He was never one to avoid his duties or let his emotions completely cloud his judgment. Because Phainon dedicated his life to the flame chase journey, he never failed to give even the most miniscule of jobs his full effort.
This was just one of the many traits Mydei admired about his lover. However, this characteristic that he deeply respected also had its fair share of drawbacks when it came to Phainon.
Since the Deliverer dedicated himself to every task, it was a given he'd sometimes push himself too far.
If he wasn't already busy enough with his own individual Chrysos Heir duties, he'd often volunteer for any mission Aglaea presented. If another heir needed help with something, it was of course Phainon who'd take time to help in any way he could. And if he had even an hour of free time, he'd spend it honing his combat abilities on the training grounds.
With all of that, it'd be impossible for Phainon not to burn out eventually. Mydei would often chastise the man for overexerting himself, telling him even the best of warriors needed time for rest.
But Phainon -in normal Phainon fashion- would simply brush it off with a carefree laugh."Is that concern I hear in your voice, Mydei? Worry not my dear prince, I'm not overdoing it. And even if I was, you'd take care of me, wouldn't you?"
Mydei wanted to smack that blithe idiot back then for not caring enough for his own well-being. Phainon very rarely confided whenever he was feeling worn thin or stressed out and only ever to Mydei. Practically no one else knew just how those bright blue eyes which always shined the sun would dim like a night sky whenever Phainon reached his limit.
It was really only in Mydei's embrace that Phainon would allow himself to unwind and relax. However, if the Crowned Prince wasn't around...
It was about midday when Mydei got back to Okhema with his envoy of Kremnoan soldiers. They'd been gone for about a week to fight the black tide in the outerlands that surrounded the Holy City.
It was a tradition in the Kremnoan culture to go on this hunting exhibition of sorts every summer solstice to bring good luck for the future battles in the year. It also served as a good excuse to keep each other's combat prowess in check while spending quality time together on the battlefield. Needless to say, Mydei always enjoyed these particular few days he got to spend with his people.
Mydei bid farewell to his fellow warriors before he began to head towards the Hero's Bath to inform Aglaea of their return.
He'd originally intended to turn in for the day after that as the week of traveling took a hefty toll on his body, but as the platform to the bath's ascended to the top he had an immediate shift in plans.
Instead of seeing the Goldweaver, he spotted the man who would always captivate any room with his presence. Phagousa’s streams of holy water flowed and trickled around them, sparkling under the radiant light of the dawn device, and in the center of that stood Phainon who's snow white hair and fair complexion appeared to glow in the artificial sunlight.
He donned his usual patterned coat and blue cape, seemingly spaced out as he stared off into the distance. Even as Mydei took heavy steps forward against the marble flooring, the Deliverer didn't appear to take notice of the Kremnoan’s presence at all.
Mydei paused a few feet away from Phainon and quietly took the opportunity to observe his dazed expression.
For all the flack Mydei gave him, Phainon's natural allure was undeniable (when he wasn't being cocky or talking nonstop of course). Everything from his sculpted body to his devastatingly defined features was tantalizing. This was even more obvious now as his face remained relaxed in his reverie, thin lips smoothed into a neutral position as his silver eyelashes fluttered dangerously close to one another.
Mydei couldn't help it when his own mouth curved into a slight smile at the endearing sight of his partner.
Though you would refute it, you look absolutely adorable right now Deliverer.
He fought back the temptation to reach out and brush his fingers against Phainon's cheek and instead opted to cut through the tranquil silence.
"What a surprise." He greeted. "I didn't expect to see you so soon, Deliverer."
At the sound of Mydei's voice, Phainon's head snapped in his direction. He looked almost shocked to see Mydei standing there, brows raised in disbelief. However, his keen eyes seemed to be a bit hazy now, like he was still half asleep.
The Deliverer stared incredulously for a few seconds, like he was seeing a ghost, before he sputtered "Mydei? You're back already?"
"Already?" Mydei repeated a bit skeptical. "It's been 6 days. I told you I'd be back by now."
"Oh... I didn't even notice it'd already been that long. Sorry."
He was being genuine with his words. Mydei needed only to study Phainon's sheepish demeanor for a moment to see there were several other things running through his mind.
Yet, in spite of knowing that fact, Mydei wasn't going to miss an opportunity to tease him. Besides, their banter usually helped ground Phainon back to the present.
Mydei placed his hand on his chest as a mock show of hurt. "Did you not miss me all this time we were apart? I was certain you'd be pining for me right about now, begging to know where I was."
Phainon, being clearly familiar with this song and dance, simply rolled his eyes and faintly smirked. "As if I couldn't go that long without seeing you. You do know I don't spend my whole day just thinking about you, right?"
A scoff. "That's rich coming from the man who wouldn't stop pestering me for attention every damn day. You'd follow me around the marketplace like a lost puppy until I relented to your whining. And besides, didn't you yourself confess there isn't a moment where I'm not on your mind-"
"Alright! Alright..." A light flush had now spread across Phainon's pale face as he loudly cut Mydei off, embarrassed by that memory from not long ago. He cleared his throat into his fist before averting his gaze to the side. "Maybe I did miss you a bit. Happy now?"
"Hm. I'm sure 'a bit' is an understatement, but I'll let it slide." Before Phainon could protest, Mydei quickly switched subjects. "Was everything alright while I was gone? You didn't have to do any missions on your own?"
A nervous glint passed through Phainon's expression before he tried to cover it with a shrug. "Nothing out of the ordinary I think. Just Caenis and the Council being difficult as usual."
The prince cocked a disbelieving eyebrow, not dumb enough to fall for such a vague explanation. "Is that so? Was that really all or am I going to have to ask Aglaea for the whole truth?"
"Hey! There's no need for that I'm not lying I swear! The elders just decided to stir up some trouble between the scholars at the Grove and Aglaea. Of course Professor Anaxa wasn't going to get involved so I went for a few days to settle the waters. So it's not like there were any combative missions anyway..."
Mydei gave a satisfied hum as he shook his head. "Sounds like a pain. What did those hyenas do this time?"
"Trust me, you really don't want to waste your time hearing about their absurdities." He muttered while rubbing his face. Usually Phainon fared better with the tedious Okheman politics than Mydei's tolerance could ever permit. Yet it appeared the former man's abundance of patience could also run out eventually. "It's been mostly dealt with now. I'm actually here to tell Aglaea the problem has been resolved before I head back to the Grove on the Professor's request. Something about me needing another lesson in 'proper etiquette'."
"Heh. Although I've never met that blasphemer in person, the more you tell me about him, the more he seems to be a rather sensible man." The Kremnoan goaded with a snort.
Phainon pouted. "That's rude Mydei. And I for one am way better at etiquette than a supposed crown royal of Castrum Kremnos."
"Think you can prove it?"
"I don't need to. I'm not the one who walks around half-naked all the time. And I certainly don't sit improperly like you. With your legs spread so scandalously…” Those azure eyes which now held an undertone of hunger raked over Mydei's figure languidly from bottom to top, taking in the image of the man before him. “Not that I'm complaining about either of those things-"
The only thing that stopped Phainon from continuing his egregious talk and completely embarrassing the both of them was the swift slap of Mydei's ungloved hand over Phainon's mouth.
"I'd rather not listen to your depraved thoughts at this hour of the day.” He removed his hand before Phainon could do something horrific such as licking his palm (he'd fallen for that trick too many times before). “Although I must admit, it's a shame you have to depart again so soon."
"Oh?" Phainon's eyes lit up as he gave a devilish grin. "Don't tell me you wanted to hear my words that badly tonight?"
It took everything within Mydei to restrain himself from swatting Phainon upside the head. "You seriously need to get your head out the gutter." He managed to scold instead. "What I meant to say was it's a shame we're missing out on some sparring. I need to check that your skills did not dull while I was away."
"Ah I get it.” Without warning Phainon moved forward, crowding into Mydei's space. With one suggestive eyebrow raised he purred almost directly into the Mydei’s ear. “You wanted to spend some quality time together 'cuz you missed me too. Don't fret too much Mydei, I'll be back by tomorrow to give you all the attention you desire."
Phainon's taunting was abruptly cut off by Mydei's fist heading straight towards his smug face. However, Phainon easily caught the blow with one hand a few inches before it met its target (just as Mydei predicted sadly). He burst out laughing while Mydei grumbled in annoyance. "...HKS."
Despite the Kremnoan's threatening voice and killer stare, Phainon showed no signs of fear. As his laughter died down, he slowly brought Mydei's fist to his chest and cradled it there with both hands like a precious gift. In that moment, Mydei thought those normally cool fingertips held an unusual amount of warmth to them. It almost startled him, not being able to recognize his lover's touch. But as Phainon lifted his eyes and looked at Mydei with that same earnest gaze, his heart calmed. The Prince felt his own ichor eyes soften at the familiar sight.
Mydei thought he must've been imagining things.
With the mood now shifted, everything felt much more intimate and heightened. Like they were temporarily freed from all their responsibilities and anxieties. No longer did they hold their titles as Crown Prince, Deliverer, or even Chrysos Heir.
For now (and in every time they previously stood together with completely open hearts to one another), they were simply Mydei and Phainon. Two men with nothing else left in this world but each other.
The next time Phainon spoke, it was much more gentle. "Perhaps it really is better to postpone our quality time. You look absolutely tired, beloved."
"I can't possibly look worse than you do right now." After watching him for some time, Mydei could clearly see Phainon's built-up fatigue from the past week. His typically sharp movements now seemed sluggish and drawn out. That, and his tousled hair and hollowed-eyed face was all the evidence Mydei needed to know the Deliverer deserved a break.
Mydei closed the small gap of space between them while still keeping their hands connected and unceremoniously plopped his head onto Phainon's left shoulder. He nuzzled his nose further into Phainon’s neck, relishing in the comforting scent of subtle vanilla. A content sigh left Mydei's lips before he whispered, "...Must you really go? I'm sure Anaxa wouldn't mind if you said you couldn't make it. We both need to rest."
A nervous chuckle resonated into the air as Phainon abruptly took a step back from their pseudo embrace. Once again, it was another oddity that Phainon would instantly move away from Mydei's touch as if he was alarmed by it.
Mydei could only direct a questioning look at Phainon who turned away and scratched his nape anxiously "I'll be okay Mydei it's only one more day. You're the one who needs to rest more after all you've been through the past few days. I already have to wait for Aglaea, so you should go ahead to your chambers. I can let her know you've returned."
It was obvious that Phainon knew he was biting off more than he could chew. Getting Mydei to leave was most likely his way of avoiding admission to that fact, especially since he knew Mydei would undoubtedly keep pushing the subject.
The Kremnoan furrowed his eyebrows in a deep scowl as he crossed his arms. "Must you always be such a hard-ass? How many times do I need to repeat myself before you get it through your thick skull?" He growled through gritted teeth.
"And how many times must I tell you I'm fine" Phainon retorted tightly. His relaxed face now tensed defensively. "I wouldn't be a worthy 'Deliverer' if I couldn't handle this much."
At times like these, Mydei wasn't certain about the reason for Phainon's annoying and borderline stupid persistence. Was it that difficult to take a break sometimes? Either way, they both knew this would continue going on forever considering their similar unyielding natures and neither seemed interested in an argument they both heard before.
So, in an uncommon occurrence, Mydei easily conceded knowing that despite Phainon's obstinance now, he'd succumb to his exhaustion eventually and go to Mydei as he always did. He still couldn't help but feel irritated that it had to come to that every time.
With the previous mood now completely soured, Mydei's shoulders sagged in defeat. However, his piercing glare at the man in front of him did not cease. "This is pointless bickering. I refuse to waste any more time with this when you always refuse to listen."
Perhaps it was Mydei's own mixture of tiredness and anger that made him so impatient then. That made him utter words harsher than he normally would with his partner (even if he was upset with him).
But to see Phainon's normally lighthearted demeanor dampen with such sadness almost made Mydei forget all the emotions running through his head. The Deliverer's mouth gaped open for a few seconds, seemingly lost on what to say before he lowered his head and quivered "Mydei-"
"Enough" Mydei snapped dismissively. "If you're so hellbent on this, don't bother with a worthless apology. It's not like I would want a real one either way."
Phainon could only nod reluctantly in response while his lips pursed, clearly wanting to say more.
Mydei let out a weary sigh, feeling much more exhausted than before he walked into the room. Not wanting to be in this suffocating atmosphere any longer, he turned on his heel in a swift motion to leave. "Let me know once you've returned tomorrow. Then we can speak about this properly.”
The Prince glanced over his shoulder, waiting for Phainon's response only to see him staring at Mydei's back wide-eyed. With one outstretched hand he reached for Mydei's wrist before stiffening as if he'd made a mistake. He quickly retracted his arm. "Alright..."
With one last ‘hmph’ of acknowledgement, Mydei finally stepped away towards the elevator while not sparing a second glance or a real farewell.
Internally, Mydei felt this was the right course of action for both of them. He needed time on his own to cool off before he uttered something he'd really regret, and Phainon was better off seriously thinking about what Mydei said. This is how they always handled disagreements anyway. Eventually they'd both settle down, apologize, and that would be the end of it.
Mydei didn't even think much else of it at the time.
What went over his head was the small but glaring abnormalities from that exchange, and not much later would he regret overlooking them in the first place.
-
His sleep was restless that night. While Mydei was fortunately not someone plagued by nightmares, the ongoing pressure of one day making the correct decision for his people and becoming a demigod seemed to grow into a major source of anxiety for him. Instead of incomprehensible visions haunting his mind, it was his own thoughts that ran rampant whenever he'd lie down and close his eyes. Usually, his own exhaustion or the presence of his partner served to remedy this, but it appeared the former wasn't working today, and the latter was simply unavailable.
So in between a fit of tossing and turning while being half asleep, Mydei was suddenly jerked to complete consciousness by a polite knock at his door.
His messy blonde hair rustled against his forehead and neck as he sat up exasperated. Although Okhema was always showered in daylight, his own room was filled with darkness from the drawn curtains at the balcony as a way to simulate the missing night. As his eyes squinted at the door, he presumed it must have been long past the curtain-fall hour at that point.
Mydei rarely had visitors show up to his home during the day, let alone at this time of night.
Of course, Phainon tended to appear whenever he pleased (Mydei didn't mind his unexpected visits but would never admit to that outloud). It was even more expected after they'd argued like last afternoon. The Deliverer was always eager to fix things rather quickly each time that happened.
However, Phainon was not even in Okhema at that time, which made this whole occurrence even more bizarre. Something important must've been going on.
Mydei let out a dull breath of air before shoved away his satin covers and rolled out of bed with only a loose pair of black pants fitted around his waist. He made his way across the room in haste, first grabbing a crimson robe from his closet before haphazardly slipping it onto his naked torso as he strode toward the entrance.
Opening the door brought in a cool summertime breeze from the corridor outside, and along with that came a familiar bone-chilling presence that Mydei knew far too well from his constant trips to the River of Souls.
"Castorice?" The so-called maiden of war stood in front of him quietly like a spectral figure as he looked down at her. Although she wore her usual frayed attire and bowed her head in a respectful greeting, she seemed to be in a much more somber mood as she stared straight at Mydei with a frown. Castorice normally avoided other's gazes, but now her magenta eyes met his with desperation.
"Lord Mydei. I apologize for bothering you, but I need to tell you something urgent." She stated with her soft voice.
"What is it?" It was rare for Castorice to ever speak so directly to anyone, especially Mydei. Despite that, they both held a large amount of unspoken respect for one another, and Mydei would not hesitate to hear her out on anything.
"Well..." Her boost of confidence began to deflate as she lowered her eyes uneasily. "Truthfully, I was told not to mention this to you, but I didn't feel it was right to leave you in the dark considering..." She trailed off with a timid shake of her head as if she was clearing her head. "Please just don't tell anyone I told you. Especially not Lord Phainon."
At the mention of his lover's name, Mydei's curiosity was officially piqued. His initial assumption was that Phainon did something foolish again and asked Castorice to cover for him. "You have my word. I won't tell him."
Castorice's tense body relaxed with a relieved sigh. Her gaze returned to him once again as she spoke. "You saw Lord Phainon earlier today, correct? Did he seem off to you?"
The Kremnoan's brows furrowed in confusion. "Not particularly. He just looked worn out like he always does when he jumps into a mess." That's why I told him to stop doing that was left unsaid.
Castorice's face twisted into a grimace not filled necessarily with despair but more so an emotion closer to guilt. Mydei recognized this face well, for he too wore it when he had to deliver the news of one of his comrades passing to their loved ones.
The realization hit him like a stab to the gut. His pulse quickened with fear as he grew to understand Castorice was most likely here to tell him something he never wanted to hear. Mydei's suddenly hoarse voice demanded an answer to a question he dreaded to ask. "...Where is Phainon?"
"He's fine, Lord Mydei." Probably seeing the terror Mydei's face, Castorice's answer was both instantaneous and assertive, which quelled some of Mydei's rising panic-
"Lord Phainon has... fallen extremely ill"
-Just before it returned this time with a touch of disbelief. In all the time Mydei knew him, Phainon had never been sick before. "What?“ He reeled.
"Lady Aglaea met with him earlier today before he was set to depart to the Grove. But during that meeting, he collapsed without warning. Thankfully, Lady Hyacine was also there since she had planned to travel back with him. She assessed his condition and made sure his life wasn't in any immediate danger."
"Does she know what's wrong with him?" Mydei asked gravely.
"She believes it was an illness brought on by overwork and stress. He should be fine as long as he rests. However, his symptoms are more severe than warranted according to Lady Hyacine. It's as if this was not just caused by Lord Phainon's work from recently but rather a built-up bout of exhaustion that finally spilled over. It's unfortunate that none of us noticed something was wrong beforehand..." She murmured the last sentence remorsefully as her clasped hands tightened around each other.
Sadly, it was only then that Phainon's weird behavior from earlier made sense to Mydei. Phainon wasn't just trying to get Mydei to leave him alone because of the rest thing but rather because he didn't want the Prince to catch on to his illness.
The unfocused appearance Phainon had when Mydei walked in the room along with the dazed words he spoke during the beginning of their conversation. He was much warmer to the touch and pulled back when Mydei made contact with him.
It all pointed to the fact that Phainon knew his condition all along and decided to not only put up a show for everyone else but even Mydei as well.
The shock from that revelation only flared for a brief second before it was eclipsed by an overwhelming feeling of infuriation.
"...That idiot." He seethed, jaw clenched so hard it almost stung. "That prideful, bull-headed, son of a bitch!" Castorice -the poor girl- physically flinched as Mydei roared. Although his anger wasn't directed at her, Mydei must've looked terrifying due to her own startled expression.
"Lord Mydei please-"
But Mydei had already rashly careened past her, prepared to strangle a certain white-haired man despite not knowing where he was yet. Mydei was barely able to register past the red in his vision that Castorice was struggling to trail behind him as her short heels hastily clicked against the tile ground.
"Where is he Castorice?" It didn't matter to Mydei whether she told him or not. He'd find out where Phainon was eventually, and then that man would have some hell to pay for being so inherently reckless.
Just then Castorice finally managed to outpace Mydei and cut in front of him with her arms raised like a human wall. The Prince stopped begrudgingly before he shot her an intimidating glare that screamed 'move'.
But it didn't work as it usually did with weaker men, as the short girl stood her ground unfazed. She uncharacteristically leveled her own glare of warning at Mydei and exclaimed, "I didn't tell you this so you could yell at him Lord Mydei. I understand why you're upset, but now is not the time to lecture him."
Mydei regarded her bitterly, "You have no idea about the countless times I warned that moron he was doing too much. And now he went on to pull a stunt like this? How do you expect me to stay quiet when he's been quite literally toying with his own life?"
"Because getting angry with Lord Phainon won't serve to help him at all right now." She shut her eyelids tightly like she was fending off her own thoughts. "All of us are frustrated with him as well, but making sure he gets better is our top priority. And I think the thing that'll help him the most is you, Lord Mydei. He needs you to be there for him."
Castorice had forced Mydei to pause and really think about what he was doing, and deep down, he knew she was right. His anger was counterproductive to what Phainon, someone who sounded seriously ill, needed. Going on a rampage against him would just make things worse.
Mydei knew it, and yet... his own conflicting thoughts skewered his judgment so severely since beneath all that anger was a lump of twisted hurt. Were they not partners? Did Phainon really not trust him enough to tell him he was feeling that considerably unwell? And even if he couldn't trust him specifically, why would he refuse to tell anyone at all?
Gradually, as both Chrysos Heirs stood still in that sunny hallway, Mydei's frustration began to dampen with the realization that Phainon's reasoning had to have been more complex. To go to such lengths to keep it hidden... Phainon must've thought it was something he had to do, and that thought scared Mydei even more.
As the anger subsided (for now), a wave of sickening worry finally tremored within Mydei's chest as he got back to realizing the gravity of the situation. Now, he felt like an idiot for letting his feelings get so out of control when he had something so important to do.
"...You're right Castorice. I'm sorry for my behavior."
Castorice exhaled shakily and lowered her arms. "You have nothing to apologize for. I know how much you care for him, so your reaction isn't unwarranted."
Neither Phainon nor Mydei ever flaunted the details of their relationship to anyone. It wasn't as if it was something they wanted to keep secret (Mydei was sure it would've been a poorly kept secret anyways considering how they acted around each other). It was simply... an extremely personal thing for both of them.
If the world was full of death and approaching its inevitable end, then what they had built together was like a veiled oasis. A small paradise they could bask in, yet to be touched by the scorching heat outside. Only they needed to know about this place, no one else.
That being said, he was sure the Chysos Heirs, being as perceptive as they were, knew exactly what was going on between the two of them. Thankfully, none of them had remarked on it directly, most likely out of respect for their privacy. But it was hard to ignore Aglaea's knowing gaze whenever she caught the pair hanging out together at the Hero's Baths or Tribbie's giggles when they jabbed teases at one another during meetings.
Surprisingly enough, it was Castorice who had tried to discreetly show the most support for them, albeit in charmingly unsubtle ways. It was her who would shyly suggest new places to eat or hang out in Okhema since they were 'pleasant spots to talk'. Once, she'd even made them matching beaded bracelets (Phainon adored those bracelets the most since they reminded him of the kind he'd make in his homeland).
She had always wished the best for them, so Mydei didn't even feel the slightest bit unnerved to know what she was hinting at so blatantly. If anything his gratitude only grew further for all she did.
"Thank you for telling me," He said sincerely. He'd have to find a way to repay her one of these days.
Castorices mouth gaped open as her eyes grew wide. A light shade of red dusted her face and she quicked turned her head to cover her embarrassment. "It's r-really no trouble Lord Mydei" was all she could manage to stammer out.
Mydei would've lightly laughed if the situation wasn't so dire, but his head was already thinking about Phainon and how bad he really was.
He asked her again, this time more serious and not clouded by anger but rather complete devotion.
"Where's Phainon?”