19 Bookmarks by tyranicToaster
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Sanji nods furiously. “Exactly. The morons aren’t in love, they’re just stupid enough to be on a wave length no one else can reach.”
“What?” Chopper’s eyes shine. “Sanji, you don’t think they belong together? They act like soulmates!”
“Chopper,” Sanji pats his head. “They can’t be soulmates. Not when the marimo has the emotional range of a sea slug.”
The bickering continues. Nami takes a sip of her drink, lips curling in amusement. They really are naive. And Nami can’t help but take advantage of the naive: especially when there’s beli to be made.
“I think we should make this interesting,” Nami announces. “Since you guys can’t agree, let’s have a friendly bet. Everyone puts in and whoever’s right gets the pot.” All of them glance around at each other before back at Nami. She smiles at them. “If you’re going to fight about it, at least make it interesting.”(or, Luffy and Zoro have been married for years. But, with all that beli on the line, Nami isn't about to tell the rest of their nakama that)
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Every hospital, clinic, and doctor’s office in the North Blue wants Trafalgar Law to die because of the white spots creeping further and further over his body.
Donquixote “Corazon” Rocinante sets fire to them all. Except one.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,045
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 55
- Kudos:
- 291
- Bookmarks:
- 81
- Hits:
- 1,794
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
26 Jan 2026
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Summary
Sometimes, the most horrifying thing of all is what might have been.
Somewhere, Jon could swear he heard a crowd laughing.
Or: in which Jonathan Sims is forced to swap places with his alternate self – a tall, chivalrous hero extraordinaire, who knows neither fear nor nuance – and is sent to the aggressively straight alternate universe the Magnus Archives was never meant to be.
“Whatever place this is,” Jon announced, “I just want to be sure it knows I hate it.”
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It starts one day when Tim is walking down an institute hallway and passes Elias Bouchard, who is about four inches shorter than usual. Tim’s reaction is rather delayed; at first, he only has a general sense of unease, a feeling that something’s not quite right—but he can’t put his finger on it. Then he looks back and makes eye contact with Bouchard, and realizes with a jolt (first of surprise, then of delight) that he’s looking down.
It starts properly the next week, when Jon comes in wearing boots that are far different from his normal work shoes.
“Are those heeled boots?” gapes Tim.
“Shut up, Tim,” Jon grumbles. “I figure if Elias gets to just make himself taller, I deserve at least an extra half inch.”Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
15 Jun 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
so silly and genuinely fun. love the dynamics at play as well
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Summary
Law stares at the other captain blankly. “You just have weed?”
“We grow it.” Robin says, smiling amusedly at Law and his obvious bafflement.
“Shrooms too!” Luffy adds.
What a strange fucking group of people. Law thinks.
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Summary
Different DHMIS stories that explore all the fun possibilities of Yellow Guy having batteries.
Centered around the main three, but Yellow-centric.
They aren’t continuous/don’t take place in the exact same universe, but then again, this is DHMIS so. Make of it what you will.
- Words:
- 13,764
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 96
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Enemies to Lovers: JonMartin Speedrun Edition by BaySprout
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
14 Aug 2022
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Summary
“This isn’t a fucking dream, Tim!” Her friend only laughs.
“Of course it is, Sasha. Because if this isn’t a dream, then Jon and Martin really stopped mid argument to make out with each other and hug like reunited lovers, and now our boss really is holding our other boss in place with magic word powers while sweet, loveable, clumsy, tea-making Martin brutally tears out his eyes with a fucking corkscrew.” He pauses. “Oh, and then began repeatedly stabbing him in the heart with a pocket knife.”
Sasha looks back over, and sure enough, Martin has discarded the gory corkscrew and tackled Elias to the ground, now plunging the knife into Elias’s chest.
“Oh, my god,” she breathes, and maybe Tim is right, because this really can’t be happening right now.
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Jonathan Sims listens to a tape and makes a choice.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 57,949
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 489
- Kudos:
- 1,596
- Bookmarks:
- 468
- Hits:
- 17,955
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
05 Aug 2021
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- Words:
- 15,868
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 122
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
19 Apr 2021
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from love and anxiety in real time by acetheticallyy (judesstfrancis)
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
20 Mar 2021
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Summary
Life sucks, and then you die. And then, if you’re Jon, you come back. And then it sucks again.
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
08 Apr 2021
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Short fic in which Tim and Sasha play a cute little prank on Martin. :)
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
10 Mar 2021
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How do you get Jonathan Sims to go on a date with you? Easy. Step one: Trick him by giving him a fake statement filled with puzzles that lead him to the date location of your choice. Step two: Profit?
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
12 Feb 2021
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Summary
n. an important moment of insight, typically one that leads to a dramatic transformation of attitude or belief
Or, in which Tim becomes an avatar for the end of all things.
- Words:
- 108,304
- Works:
- 12
- Bookmarks:
- 434
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
16 Jul 2020
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Summary
'Sexy eye cult celibate?' Martin began to type and then hurriedly backspaced. Best to be specific.
'Can eye priests have sex,' he revised, and clicked enter.
In which Martin accidentally joins a cult, but quickly realizes he's in need of salvation. Hijinks ensue.
Series
- Part 1 of the gospel according to us
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 51,601
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 894
- Kudos:
- 2,047
- Bookmarks:
- 509
- Hits:
- 25,286
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
14 Jul 2020
Bookmarker's Notes
god this is literally one of the best fics ive seen in a while. definitely worth the read
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creatures that i briefly move along (teacher!jon au) by dotsayers
Fandom The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
11 Jan 2025
- Words:
- 24,036
- Works:
- 13
- Bookmarks:
- 714
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
10 Jul 2020
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Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
21 May 2020
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Summary
He fell into a deep bow, smiling the whole while. “I’m the ringmaster, of course.”
“Is that skin— Is it yours?” Old wood groaned as the Archivist shifted his weight. “Originally.”
“It is!” the ringmaster said as he swooped back upright. “Nikola decided I wore it well, so she let me keep it. Why do you ask?”
The Archivist gave him another once-over. “You just… you look familiar. Like someone I know.”
On relearning, reconnecting, and redefining.
Series
- Part 1 of Come What May
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 157,201
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 2,189
- Kudos:
- 2,406
- Bookmarks:
- 598
- Hits:
- 65,271
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
07 Apr 2020
Bookmarker's Notes
on GOD this is driving me CRAZY its like im really there...
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Shlooghorgh's #1 employee meets his new coworker.
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
28 Oct 2019
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Zim is entrusted with a smeet as part of the Invader Apprenticeship Program. Naturally, the Tallest have given him the privilege of being the program's first mentor.
Bookmarked by tyranicToaster
28 Oct 2019