1 - 20 of 40 Works by horselizard
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How Hugo came to be under Goudron's care.
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"For the most part I understand the necessity of internet horny posting for a lot of people but some of the things you guys say on here makes it sound like being the victim of a slapstick routine would be the ultimate sexual fantasy" - tumblr user coughloop
Happy Saturday the 14th, everyone!
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Bound to Lose by horselizard
Fandoms: Taskmaster (New Zealand TV) RPF, New Zealand Comedy RPF, Taskmaster NZ
28 Aug 2021
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The Taskmaster's Assistant has to be able to take a little light humiliation. Just... not that well.
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Double Whammy by horselizard
Fandoms: British Comedy RPF, Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster (Podcast)
25 May 2019
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Ed and Victoria get competitive. Genie James gets caught in the crossfire.
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Pour Some Sugar On Me by horselizard
Fandoms: British Comedy RPF, Just Puddings (Webseries)
12 May 2019
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I found an excuse for James Acaster to get covered in food, and ran with it for 5k+ words.
Pretty pleased with myself, actually.
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A musical tribute to Taskmaster's very own Chaos Emerald.
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James isn't a big fan of fancy dress. He doesn't like having to put so much thought into his appearance. But he can scrub up pretty well, when he has the right motivation.
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James should really pick on someone his own size. Things might not go so badly for him if he did.
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Strapped by horselizard for Sashataakheru
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Comedy RPF
28 Dec 2018
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They're not filming a show any more, but the roles seem to remain the same as they ever were. Alex gets James to do stupid things, James does them, and Greg... judges.
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Spent by horselizard for Sashataakheru
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Comedy RPF
17 Dec 2018
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Sometimes, the things Greg does to James are for his own good. Alex isn't sure how he feels about this.
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Years of gastronomic deprivation can make a hologram do strange things. Even when Lister is watching.
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For Series VIII, Cassandra's actually a pretty good episode, isn't it? You know, apart from that one plot thread that's not only kind of rapey towards the show's only female character, but also pretttty inconsistent with previous characterisation, when it comes to certain people's attitudes towards sex...
Here comes fix-it-fic to save the day. }:-)
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SPOILERS (ish) FOR RED DWARF XI EPISODE 4 "OFFICER RIMMER"!
So I thought I'd try something a little bit ridiculous... the episode has NOT yet aired, I did NOT go to any recordings or previews, I have NO insider knowledge, I am ONLY basing this off synopses and promo photos and whatnot.
This is what happened when all those titbits of information jiggled together in my mind. I very much doubt this is anything close to how the episode will play out, but a ficcer can dream ;)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 850
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 19
- Hits:
- 315
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"Words had weight to Rimmer. Lister had known that for a long time, from the way he hurled them like weapons, hoping they'd stick. It had come as no surprise, that first time he'd held him down in bed and hissed “smeghead” into his ear, to see his mouth fall open, to see the flush spread across his cheeks, to see his simulated breath quicken with want."
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A reworking of a scene from "Parallel Universe". At first glance, nothing is any different from what we're shown in the episode. Lister knows otherwise.
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The intention of this fic is to ruin the Series VII opening monologue for everybody. XD
I blame the RD Tumblr fandom for this (particularly Kahvi), but then, I may possibly have been the bit of said fandom whose fault that whole thing was in the first place.
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There comes a time in every Red Dwarf slash writer's career when they must write a Terrorform fic. ;) Porn without plot... almost.
The first line is taken from one of Ilthit's fantastic drabbles (see notes for link).
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A small and silly Bodyswap fic. Small and silly being, as it happens, more or less how Rimmer feels by the end of it.
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"Missing scenes" from Entangled. Started as a one-scene ficlet... ended up rather bigger.
Lister and Rimmer's relationship arrangement is complicated, and they don't always manage to do right by each other. But somehow, one way or another, they muddle through.
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Rewrite of "Confidence & Paranoia". Never has a throwaway comment in a chat about meta inspired such lengthy reams of cruel, cruel porn.
A mutated holo-virus brings two aspects of Rimmer's subconscious to hologrammatic life. The results are about as unpleasant as you'd expect.