all_discombobulated



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    The Voyageurs ask Shane to join FanMail in order to foster a better connection with fans. Internet sleuths start to notice some interesting details in the background of Shane’s videos, and then the internet does...what the internet does.

    Or Shane and Ilya are granted an opportunity to come out on their own terms. Sort of. And in they do it in a very Ilya way. (Surprisingly, it is Shane’s idea)

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    18 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya Rozanov has a "tiny car accident" (his words). Shane Hollander has a full-scale, system-shutdown panic attack about it. Meanwhile, a horrified Hayden is praying for someone to throw him in a lake and tell him that this is all just a big joke, or maybe for a meteor strike; he is really not picky. J.J., on the other hand, is trying to bleach the image of his sweet captain making out with Ilya fucking Rozanov from his brain.

    It's a very normal day for the Montreal Canadiens.

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    18 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Rozanov glanced at Shane's phone screen, reading the top notification. Then his mouth curved. “Duolingo, huh? So fucking boring, Hollander.”

    Shane’s face went hot. “Yeah,” he said. “Learning French.”

    Rozanov’s eyes snapped to his. The smirk deepened. “Bad liar, Hollander. You are fluent.”

     

    or - Ilya finds out that Shane has been learning Russian behind his back.

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    18 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane wears Ilya's jersey.

    Ilya's brain short-circuits.

    Series
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    17 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Lily: Well. There is very interesting studies I have read recently.

    Karolina: We’re listening!

    Lily: Research shows that abstinence can significantly improve athletic performance. Testosterone levels, energy conservation, mental focus. All better with sexual abstinence.

    Jackie: Wait, seriously?

    Lily: Oh yes, very serious research. Professional athletes should abstain completely during playoff runs. Some studies suggest 6-8 weeks for optimal results.

    Satu: SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS?!

    When “Lily” gets added to the Montreal Voyageurs WAGs group chat, she comes armed with peer-reviewed research, vibrators for everyone, and one revolutionary idea: a playoff sex ban for optimal athletic performance. The WAGs are convinced it’s evidence-backed science, the team is suffering, and Ilya is having the time of his life watching his handiwork unfold.

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    17 Feb 2026