Archive of Our Own ^beta

The first few weeks following their initial ‘getting-together’ stage are...awkward.

Casey and April do a terrible job of becoming a fully functioning couple. They act the same; violent poking barrages in the Shellraiser over trivial topics, childish (thought amusing) insults for each other, and of course, never-ending arguments that technically never get resolved, only reborn. The only thing that does change in their dynamic is that they can go from screaming at each other to angrily making-out and it’s actually kind of expected.

The downside is that they both have a mutual best friend, and that mutual best friend is all kinds of uncomfortable with it.

When he’s honest with himself--and he looks at them, and he can tell that they’re happy--Raph doesn’t mind at all. He can look away when the kissing becomes a little too deep. He can back out of the room if Casey’s hand is wandering up April’s shirt like it has a mind of its own. At the very least, he can snort and tease them and make ridiculous catcalls if they just so happen to get a bit raunchy during night patrol.

But if he’s really honest with himself, he knows that not enough. There’s something that lingers when he turns his head away, and there’s a lump in his throat that he has to work around to utter even a weak wolf-whistle. He sees them together and his heart pounds harder than it has any right to; his hands sweat and he feels so awkwardly displaced that he can hardly collect his thoughts.

So, for the most part, having best friends that that are also dating generally sucks.

“Dude,” Casey grins, and his arm is slung carelessly around April’s shoulders, “you, me, Apes and the worst B-movies we can find. Sound good?”

Raph wants to say no. Movie nights with April and Casey is actually code for we just wanted the living room to ourselves so we could make-out and it’s a good thing Raph doesn’t really mind. It’s uncomfortable and really, really irritating--not to mention confusing (do his brothers feel a little dizzy when they accidentally get a glimpse of a hardcore make-out session?) and Raph seriously wants to say no.

But the stupid little part of his brain that will do anything in the world for these two block-headed, lovable humans is downright pleased, and he gives a small shrug.

“Sounds good.”

Goddammit, he thinks as he returns April’s smile.

-

The first movie they watch is called Octo-saur and the only good thing about is the cheesily awesome music score. Raph finds himself laughing at the god-awful acting along with April and Casey, despite having decided not to have any fun that night. The bowl of popcorn disappears steadily and by the time the credits are rolling, Raph’s sides hurt from laughing and yet he’s the one voted to get a refill. (April and Casey have a good laugh over watching him struggle to find the right finger, until he ultimately gives up and spits an angry “Fuck you,” at both of them.)

Donnie’s microwave is a beautiful piece of crap, and Raph is genuinely surprised that it hasn’t blown up yet. He pops the popcorn, fills the bowl, and returns to the living room.

“So I was thinking that we could watch Sharkquake next--”

It’s a miracle that he doesn’t drop the bowl. But his heart does one of those stupid, stammering flutters and he gives a strangled gasp--because this is the fifth time this week he’s walked in on those two getting at it, and damn if that doesn’t get old really fast.

April cracks open on eye--presumably after hearing Raph gurgle like a baby, oh god-- and pushes Casey off the couch with little remorse. He curses loudly and Raph stares blankly at April’s beckoning hand.

Because that’s normal.Here, Raph, let me shove my boyfriend to the ground so you can sit next to me instead.Yeah, totally normal.

Somehow, Raph remembers how to move his feet and he shuffles next to April. He stiffly shoves the popcorn bowl into her hands, and looks even less pleased about sitting down, where he keeps his distance from her.

Casey frowns (his bandana is messed up and so his is hair and he looks stupid, really stupid, but also messily attractive) and shares a look with April. Then they both turn their heads to look at Raph.

“Are you okay?” April says, reaching a hand out to gently brush against his arm.

There’s no comfortable way to explain that watching you two kiss gets me hot and bothered so Raph grunts and shies away from her. He tries to ignore the soft flush on her cheeks and the swell of her lips and how wicked awesome it would be if he swooped in and kissed her.

“Buuuull,” Casey sings and he clambers onto his knees. “What’s wrong bro?”

“Nothing. Let’s just watch the movie.”

This time, April is the one that calls him out, and she does that thing where she looks him in the eye and he knows she can see his every emotion. Fucking empaths.

Her expression hardens. “Not until you tell us what’s wrong.”
That look is one he’s seen Mr. O’Neil make on long nights. It’s a cross between frustration and straight up anger. If the immovable object ever had a face--well, the O’Neil’s already had it mastered.

“I--” Raph starts, looking at her, then him, then nothing. “I’m fine,” he mumbles lamely, “just drop it already.”

“Oh I see how it is.” Raph looks up in surprise to see Casey’s face a stony shell. “Your best buds get together and suddenly you can’t tell them anything. That’s rich, Raph.”

“What?” Raph says, because seriously, what? “Case, you know that’s not true--”

“You never hid stuff from us before! All three of us were open books and that changed as soon as April and I became a...a thing.” He glares and looks honestly betrayed, “I thought you said you were cool with us!”

“I am!” This conversation is going south very quickly.

“Then tell us what’s wrong!”

“There’s nothing wrong!”

“Raph--”

He explodes, both hands thrown into the air and absolutely snarls at them. “I can’t!” he cries out and keeps going despite their stunned silence, “Jesus, I want to, I wish I could but I just can’t!”

It tooks a few seconds for his heavy breathing to even out. April has yet to give, and though her voice is soft, she sternly squeezes his arm. “Don’t be dumb, Raph, you can tell us anything. Open books, remember?”

Raph feels his hands clench into fists so tightly the skin around his knuckles pale. His heart is doing that stupid hammering thing again and if they want to know so bad well then fine, he’ll tell them.

Or show them. Whatever.

With a muffled cry of rage, Raph grabs the neck of Casey’s dull sweatshirt and smashes their faces together in what has to be the worst kiss in the history of time. But dammit he will power through it; he swallows down the awkward, the embarrassment, and kisses Casey like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do.

After he let’s go, it takes a moment to realize what he just did. Then he flushes deeply and keeps his face turned away from both of them and wishes he could kick himself.

“Um,” Casey starts.

“Save it, Jones. Let’s just act like this never happened and watch the damn movie.”

He doesn’t want to do anything--except maybe lay down and wither away--but if they would at least give him that…

“Raph.”

Something in April’s tone shakes him. It dawns on him that he just kissed her boyfriend right in front of her, and if that isn’t a dick move he doesn’t know what is.

(On the other hand, he doesn’t know if saying I really want to kiss you too would actually help the situation.)

He’s halfway through an apology when April’s lips are on his and he’s forced into silence. The initial shock doesn’t fully wear off, but Raph can at least convince his body to move, to lean forward, into it. He let’s Apri lead--because, seriously, he sucks at this--and tries to imagine it won’t end.

His heart his pounding. His hands are sweaty. And the feel of her lips lessens both things but arises a completely new kind of need in him.

When she pulls away, he’s positively dizzy and sucks in air like a fish out of water. Both eyes are open wide and gaping at her--and after a tense moment of silence April and Casey burst into loud, guffawing laughter.

Raph pushes aside his embarrassment to be properly confused about the whole thing.

“I told you he wanted in,” April smirks at Casey, her boyfriend blushes around the tips of his ears and shrugs.

“How was I supposed to guess that? Not all of us are empaths, Apes.”

Raph has something really clever to say, he’s sure of it. He opens his mouth, and all that comes out is a pitiful squeak of a word-- “What?”

Okay, fine, forget clever. He just wants some answers.

“I don’t know if you’re aware of this, Raph, but most people don’t lick their lips every time their best friends kiss,” April teases, nudging him affectionately. "You weren't exactly subtle."

Ohgodohgod he does that? He never even realized! Embarrassment comes back like a punch in the face and he can only gape at her while his cheeks burn.

“I don’t--” he stammers, “I mean--I never--”

“You do. All the time.” Casey gives him a lopsided grin. “It was kind of distracting.”

Even though they’re underground, Raph wishes lightning would strike him into oblivion. Or maybe, if he’s lucky, he’ll crumple into dust on the spot.

He pulls his knees up and rests his forehead on them, groaning loudly. (It makes the other two laugh and that doesn’t help things at all.) “I’m sorry. This is awkward as hell and I’m really sorry, guys, I just...I dunno, I couldn’t not want to--”

April interrupts kindly. “We get it, Raph. But next time you feel like kissing Casey, give me some warning, alright? My first instinct is to kill you.”

And that works a small snort out of him. “Will do, Apes.”

“Some warning would be nice for me too. You kind of suck at kissing, dude, I have to, like, psyche myself up for it.”

It’s easy to ram the nearest pillow into Casey’s face, to shove him feign anger. To slip back into being themselves with no white elephant in the room, looming over them.

It’s also nice to be included in the tangle of arms and legs when at last they fall asleep. April isn’t shy--she kisses both her boys goodnight, lays her head down in Raph’s lap and her feet in Casey’s, and drifts off. They look at each other, shrug, and find a comfortable position (Raph head under Casey’s chin, Casey’s arm around Raph’s shoulders) and shut their eyes.

So basically--it’s probably the best movie night they’ve ever had.