Chapter Text
It's been about a week or so since Vox attempted to take over heaven and hell. In that week, Lucifer was left with a lot of thinking to do.
It was quite ironic, really; he had spent the last 7 years trying to avoid that very thing. Had he succeeded in that span of time? Well, no. If anything, it got worse as time went on. Avoiding responsibility was easy: just a call to make or an order to decree, and that was that. The past, however, was not as easily avoidable. It was one of the things nobody could escape here. The air reeked of error, the rain screamed in agony, a fog of sins and regrets clouding up the place like a gas chamber.
Lucifer was pretty sure his own regrets were a large factor adding to that feeling. Watching thousands upon thousands of monsters crowd up the streets of the cesspit he had (unwillingly) created. When Lucifer gave Eve the apple that day, it was meant to give humans the wonderful gift of free will. He had expected them to be like Lilith, full of hopes and dreams. Taking that ability to choose and forge ahead to bring about amazing changes for both themselves and others. Instead, these people took the gift that cost him and Lilith everything and spat on it. They use their free will to commit unspeakable horrors against themselves and others. All the while, Lucifer was forced to watch them do so, without even so much as the ability to smite the worst of the worst. Something that, thanks to Vox, has now been exposed to the wider public.
There was something else the TV-man had said that Lucifer still thought about. The accusation that the King of Hell thought that the people should be satisfied with an endless existence of suffering. His first instinct as the cameras and lights pointed at him was to deny and try to clarify his stance. Lucifer didn’t think they should be punished mindlessly, but…he also couldn’t deny that he didn’t think the exterminations did serve some use. He didn’t actively hate his people, exactly; it was more a sense of apathy towards them. He just thought some of them were absolute monsters that deserved to meet the blade. Besides, wasn’t it more merciful that way? A quick death instead of eternal damnation with no hopes of anything better?
At least, that’s what he had thought. That last point seemed to have been proven wrong by his very own daughter. Lucifer had helped out the hotel, not because he believed it would work, but because it would make her happy. He would support her dreams, no matter what they were or what he personally thought. She had friends who seemed to care about her (mostly) and was happier than he had seen her in years. Who was he to deny his little lady that joy? It turned out that her “pipe dream” had more merit to it than at first glance. Her friend Sir Pen….snake guy, managed to do the impossible and get himself redeemed into Heaven. From what the King heard, the guy had attempted to save his friends by putting his life on the line for them. Once the hotel had been rebuilt, it really gave Lucifer something to chew on.
A serpent was the first to fall, and the first to rise–the irony was fitting. Just how many more sinners like Snake Guy were out there? Those whom he had written off as trash, but just maybe had the chance to be something better. To choose something better. Had he robbed them of the freedom he had once given it all up for? How many of them could have turned a new leaf if they had just been granted some guidance? Was it not the job of a ruler to provide them with that? All these were questions that had been swirling in his head before, but now droned on endlessly in his mind after the latest fiasco.
With the hotel now booming with business for the right reasons this time, it seemed like his little lady had earned the respect of the people. With the help of her friends and that seraphim (Lucifer had never seen her before), Charlie seemed to now be in the position her mother was once in. A leader who cared for the people above all else, even her own life at times. The exact opposite of what Lucifer currently was. After that incident during Vox’s rally, he wasn’t sure Charlie fully forgave him for that. He had asked her girlfriend (Vagatha?) if his daughter was still mad at him, but he never got a clear-cut answer. Frankly, he didn’t want to ask. He felt like he didn’t quite deserve one anyway.
Charlie let him stick around, however, so that was something at least. Although he was far more nervous with the media attention than he used to be. Months ago, he didn’t care how they looked at him. For as much as Lucifer had neglected his duties, he was still respected as king. Even more so after he beat up Adam. It painted him as their savior for a little while. By contrast, he now always fully dressed up before going outside his room, and always kept up a smile no matter what. So this must be what Red Guy feels like…
Speaking of the bellhop, he seemed to be in a far better mood recently. Whispers about him breaking free from some deal. Lucifer didn’t care enough to listen to the full details; old habits die hard. However, it did provide him with an idea.
Charlie was in the perfect position to lead the people. The people, however, are not all as good as she wishes they were. It wouldn’t take much for some wayward sinner to take advantage of his daughter’s kind heart. She needed someone there to…clear the path of any obstacles, so to speak. Someone able and willing to take care of any problems that may arise quickly and efficiently. With enough cunning to make the correct call in any given situation. Regrettably, someone seemed to fit the bill just perfectly.
Lucifer sighed as he looked across his balcony, towards the land below. It looked like reparations were still being made. He helped out a bit here and there, but after the toll that box took on him, he didn’t have the strength to fully fix the Pentagram. It was probably another reason why Charlie’s hotel appealed to so many sinners. It was likely that a significant portion of them lost their housing in the madness caused by both the fighting and the machine. Granted, large-scale fights and destruction were par for the course in Hell. Just because they were used to it didn’t mean it wasn’t still a cause of pain for them. Another cause to add to the list.
The snake on his hat started to hiss slightly. It had sensed something nearby. The fallen angel doesn’t even bother looking back to acknowledge the observer. It didn’t take a genius to figure out who it was at this point. Perfect timing, as the details of Lucifer’s plan started to form into something coherent instead of self-pity.
It had been so boring just watching that corny, motherducking king wallow in his own emotions for the last week. Alastor had come the expect the pathetic little man to be just as much of a wreck as he usually was. “Lu” was still a wreck; let’s not give him too much credit now. It was just in a different way than what the Radio Demon was used to. Although Duck-boy had always had a habit of sticking his foot in his mouth, there was still an air of confidence (as long as his daughter wasn’t concerned) about him. Now he still stuck his foot in his mouth, but lacked that subtle confidence he once had. It looks like the king’s ego was now about as large as he was. It gave Alastor a great sense of schadenfreude to watch a man of power falter like this. A vulnerable mind was an open mind to be used as he pleased!
During his time alive, Alastor had learned that if you wanted to get ahead in life, you needed to get someone a rung higher than you on the ladder in your pocket. The princess was in a great position at the moment. She considered him a friend and was currently feeling a bit indebted to him after what she saw as Alastor taking care of Vox and bringing in Rosie to help with the weapon. Was that remotely close to the truth? Who cared as long as it seemed that way to her. Add to that the respect she had garnered from her stunt there at the end, and Charlie was a good card to keep close to his chest.
Yet, for as nice as it was to have the AD in your pocket, if the director himself is also ripe for the taking, what fool wouldn’t take his shot? So Alastor stuck around to keep an eye on the fallen angel. With the right strings pulled, this shouldn’t be too hard. The lonely man was in desperate need of something. All Alastor needed to do was find what that something was and play him like a fiddle from there. Rosie would have never let him pull a con like this, but thanks to Vincent’s ego and obsession with him, he was off her leash. He was also able to swindle his way into getting his staff fixed as well. Oh, how so, very satisfying it was to turn that woman’s words against her! A bluff so well crafted that she genuinely bought it. As if Alastor would let the little Morningstar slip past him so easily. He was self-serving, not wasteful.
“You can stop lurking. I know you’re there,” said Lucifer out of the blue.
So it seems his presence had been felt. Odd, the little man usually started trading not-so-subtle insults the second he laid eyes on the Radio Demon. How interesting. The tension spoke of a man who was just tired and had just recently come to some sort of conclusion. It bordered on unsettling for such an unserious creature to act so solemn. All Alastor saw was a moment here to seize.
“Sire. You cannot blame my curiosity for your current state. It is not often you’re in such a coherent and composed state.”
Alastor had thrown in a bit of that Southern drawl onto his words. Sadly (not really), it also came with a passive-aggressive comment to follow. Old vices tended to stick, and it would have been too obvious without it.
“Alastor, you can drop the honorifics. I’m not a complete idiot, I know they don’t suit you. There is no respect coming from you.”
Well, he wasn’t wrong; Alastor had never referred to him as such. As for the lack of respect, that was accurate as well. Who would respect a bumbling, incompetent clown of an aristocrat? Lucifer’s attitude did make the Radio Demon question if he was as airheaded as he portrayed himself as.
“Observant. Fine. My point still stands. You must have something in mind if you aren’t throwing your frivolous insul-”
The blonde interrupts him with six words that had his attention in an instant.
“I want to propose a deal.”
“My apologies then, sire,” the deer just threw that in there to spite him. “To what do I owe the pleasure? One would think that after the recent incident, you’d want nothing to do with sinners. Especially with one like myself. What changed?”
Lucifer ignores the veiled jabs and continues, “Charlie is almost ready to lead the people of hell. She has given people hope they haven’t felt since her mother. I intend to clear the path for her to take power without major issues.”
Alastor had a feeling he knew where this was going, but he was still a bit shocked nonetheless. He played dumb; no point in scaring off this golden opportunity with unnecessary arrogance.
“Hm…that is certainly something to think on. Now, what does this have to do with me?” In layman's terms, what did Alastor get out of this arrangement? Nothing in this place came without strings attached.
“I lend you my power; the power of a sinner is nothing compared to the power of an angel.” Lucifer couldn’t help but take a dig at Alastor even now. Figures. The deer despised being reminded of this fact, but kept his mouth shut for now. He had learned in life to just fawn and smile when a man of higher social standing offered you something.
The king states his terms, “In exchange, you’ll become my personal executioner.”
The deal just got sweeter the more he talked. Being on another leash was unappealing, but he could negotiate his way into a bit more freedom. He had learned from that first deal with Rosie. Never again.
“Curious. I was under the assumption that Your Majesty held only apathy towards sinners. Has that humiliating incident really changed your outlook so thoroughly?” The glee in his tone must have been clear to Lucifer. Alastor knew he was treading on thin ice with his little comments; the thrill was worth it.
“I do only hold apathy towards you sinners. This arrangement is only for Charlie’s sake.” The annoyance in his tone indicated that Alastor may be starting to test his luck.
He was sure enough how this deal would work out that the next words that Lucifer said genuinely gave him pause.
“Once that is done, your ultimate goal…is to kill me.”