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Zoro really isn’t sure how his day went from defeating just another bounty to nearly getting his head taken off by a snarling fish, and at this point he’s too tired to bother asking.
But here he is, crouched in a corner of the main hold of this crummy little ship, swords sheathed and hands held palm-out as he tries to calm down the merman thoroughly secured to the far wall. Seriously, the idiots Zoro’s just gotten done with killing really outdid themselves: the mer’s arms are twisted up behind his back, tied at the wrists and elbows, and held in place by a thick net wrapped around his entire torso that’s chafed all the spots with bare skin instead of scales. A thick collar and short chain keep him stuck against the wall, and just to make matters worse, he’s gagged and blindfolded, probably meant to terrify as much as disorient.
They should have worried more about the tail.
The long shimmering gold-and-blue limb lashes back and forth, multiple coils of rope tied around it long since pulled free of their tethers to the wall. That is what nearly knocked Zoro’s head off when he first stepped through the door, drawn by the sound of muffled thumping. And now- well, it’s not like he can use his swords on someone who’s so badly tied up, even if the mer clearly is capable of lashing out.
(He really should argue for hazard pay with this job.)
The mer hisses, what little of his face is visible twisted up in a furious expression. “Would you just calm down,” Zoro snaps back, at the end of his limited patience. “For the last time, I am not one of the idiots who put you down here, I’m trying to help you get out!”
Miracle of miracles, that thrashing tail slows down just the smallest bit.
“I’m a bounty hunter,” he keeps going, not moving a muscle other than his jaw and tongue and whatever else is required to talk. “I’m getting paid to deliver the heads of three thieves, all human. You want me to just leave you down here for someone else to find, or not, fine, but I’d rather cut you loose before I go.”
The tail slows some more. Its owner tries to mutter something through his gag, a slightly different pinch to his face.
“Yeah yeah, I’m not stupid enough to try anything when I’m close enough for you to hit.” Apparently that’s a good enough response to whatever the mer said, because he lets his tail fall still, letting Zoro get a better look at just how dry and cracked the scales are. “Fuck, they didn’t give you any water at all, did they?”
An annoyed grumble. Cautious, Zoro inches closer, towards the mer’s head, figuring he’ll start with the collar and go from there. Already tense muscles stiffen up even further when he kneels down and sets a hand against the guy’s shoulder, but no frenzied motions start up again, which can only be a good sign.
“I didn’t see a key for the chain,” Zoro says, “But I can cut the collar easy enough, if you don’t mind my sword getting that close to your neck.”
The mer sucks in a sharp breath; it comes back out in a slow, shaky exhale, before he nods. With his hand braced against bare skin, Zoro can feel just how bad the guy is trembling.
So. Out Wado Ichimonji comes, to carefully slice through stiff leather. Then Zoro does the same with the netting, and the ties around the mer’s arms, before worrying about coming back up to the gag and blindfold. It proves to be a good choice of order, seeing as the mer shakes out his arms and eagerly tears the cloth wraps off his face himself, spitting out a vehement “Fuck,” along with wadded up cloth and a bit of blood.
“Better?” Zoro asks, which turns out to be the only word he gets before the mer turns to look at him, and the sight of a blazing blue eye is like a punch to the gut.
“Oh, just peachy,” the guy growls. “Please tell me at least one of those bastards is still alive for me to sink my claws into.”
“...uh. No. Sorry.”
Hissing out between clenched teeth, the mer moves on to slashing at the ropes around his tail instead. “Not like they’d live long anyway, I suppose. Fuck, I need to rehydrate. What’s today’s date?” Zoro rattles off the number automatically, and winces at the alarmed expression it triggers. “Dammit- the old geezer is going to be so pissed, I’ve got to get back-”
“Take five minutes to eat something,” Zoro can’t help but huff. For whatever reason, that makes the mer go stock still, staring at him. “I mean- I dunno how far you’re gonna have to swim to get home, or how long you’ve been here, but it’d be stupid not to get something in your stomach first.”
“It would,” the mer agrees, continuing to stare at Zoro in a way he’s not about to try and figure out. “I- I don’t suppose, when you were killing the idiots who thought they could sell me, that you happened to see a seashell pendant anywhere else on this ship?”
Turns out the seashell in question is sitting in a nice box one of the guys dropped when Zoro first jumped aboard, thankfully undamaged, to Sanji’s relief. As soon as he pulls it on over his head, though, the guy gives Zoro one hell of a jumpscare, abruptly shimmering and transforming.
Nice clothes and two legs aside, though, the guy still wobbles badly when he stands up, so Zoro puts himself under Sanji’s shoulder for him to lean on as they head for the ship’s galley. He gets a brief pat for the trouble; apparently all the thanks he’s going to get, seeing as the magic seashell turns Sanji human, but at the cost of his ability to talk.
...a cost that does, admittedly, turn out to be a huge bargain, considering just how well the guy cooks. Seriously, if Zoro compared his skill with swords to talent with putting a good meal together, he and Sanji are absolutely on the same level. Simple rice and fish, but hands down the best rice and fish he's ever eaten, and Zoro makes a point of saying so.
Sanji’s ears flush pink even as he turns away, and it feels like just as much of a victory as taking out the three idiots earlier.
After they’ve both eaten, the cook stays put to clean up, while Zoro heads outside to retrieve and bag the heads of his bounties, along with a handful of the fancy trinkets they’ve stolen that earned them Wanted posters in the first place. Normally he wouldn’t bother with the items, but this listing specifically stated ‘more berri per returned artifact’, and he’s been short on cash lately, so.
Just as he’s finishing up, Zoro hears a splash from the other side of the boat’s cabin. A moment later there’s a flicker of blue and gold in the water, right before Sanji pops up beside the gangplank. “Ugh, that feels good. Are you all set, then?”
“Yeah, I’ll take these guys up the road to the local port and get my reward. Thanks for the food - you gonna be okay getting home?”
“I might take it easy at first,” the mer admits, “But I’ll be fine. Hardest part will be calming my old man down when I find him, I’m sure.” He hesitates for a moment, glancing out to sea and back. “Ever heard of the Baratie?”
“Uh-uh.”
“It’s a restaurant, on a ship,” Sanji says, and that does kinda makes sense, doesn’t it? “We sail a circuit around this part of the East, if you ever want a good meal again. I might even talk my shitty geezer into letting it be free of charge, if I let him know about you cutting me loose.”
“Sounds good,” Zoro tells him, grinning. “I’ll see you around then, Curls.”
It takes a baffled moment, but then one of Sanji’s hands flies up to his oddly-curled eyebrow, the one not hidden by damp bangs. “Oh, fuck off, I take it back, don’t show your stupid mossball hair at my restaurant-”
“Too late, you already invited me!” A big splash of water hits Zoro right in the face for that, and over the sound of his sputtering, he hears Sanji laugh. “Hey!”
“Take care, Moss!” And with that, the mer turns and dives, sunlight glinting off his unfurled fins the last thing Zoro sees before they vanish under the water.
“....yeah. You too.”
Except, for three years, it seems like every time Zoro’s in the area and actively looking for the merman’s restaurant, he only tracks down where it’s been. Closest he comes to actually finding the place, it’s supposedly anchored off an island where he’s pursuing a new bounty - but by the time Zoro takes the guy down and finds his own way through the local forest after the path disappears, the Baratie has already set off for other waters.
It’s annoying, but not something to get huffy about, so Zoro keeps to his tasks and his goal, constantly improving his swordsmanship, taking down bigger and bigger bounties.
Until Shells Town.
Until Luffy.
And that’s when a lot of shit changes.
So apparently, Sanji never said the secret to finding his restaurant would be to not look for it, a fact that has Zoro rolling his eyes as they moor the Merry and head on inside. Usopp is looking around with bright-eyed wonder, even as he’s dragged arm-in-arm towards the entrance by Luffy, already announcing he smells something good. Nami moves a bit slower, looking more carefully, so Zoro ambles along beside her, casting his own gaze over the place. Nothing particularly interesting or dangerous stands out by the time they’re inside being seated. When the server who led them to the table starts to step away does Zoro think to ask- “Hey, you still have a guy named Sanji working here?”
“Sanji?” The man’s eyes narrow, peering at Zoro, looking him up and down and lingering on his swords. “I- don’t believe I recognize the name.”
Zoro narrows his eyes right back. That’s a lie if ever he’s heard one. “I know he was here at least three years ago, and his old man runs the place or something.”
“I can ask,” the guy says stiffly, before walking away at a fast pace. Zoro grunts, and when he settles back in his seat again, the others are looking at him strangely.
Another grunt gets Nami to ask, “You know someone here?”
“Kinda. Just met the guy once, when I-” Cut him loose in a ship’s hold where he was being held prisoner “-helped him get out of a mess. Cooked a great meal to thank me. Said I could get a free one if I ever came by his restaurant.”
“Free food!” Well, that’s got Luffy grinning from ear to ear.
“Let me guess,” Nami drawls, slouching back in her own seat, “You could never find this place to take him up on that, could you?”
“It’s a ship, woman, that’s always moving. I didn’t exactly have a compass that could point me straight here.”
“Riiiight.”
Before she or either of the others can say anything else, they all hear a commotion in the kitchen - and then the doors swing open for a tall blond geezer who is definitely not the merman Zoro helped out. The hackles go up on the back of his neck as the guy stomps towards them, moving smoothly on a peg leg, tall hat not so much as wobbling with the movement.
All four of them stare with varying amounts of wariness as the guy comes to a halt right in front of their booth, arms folded and glowering, braided mustache practically bristling. “Got a policy around here that anyone asking after my employees has to deal with me first.” Those sharp eyes sweep the whole table. “So what’s this about a bounty hunter asking after someone who used to work here?”
“Used to?” Zoro frowns. “Did he not make it back okay?”
That gives the old man pause, and he looks Zoro up and down with even more intensity than the guy who seated them. It takes a second, but something seems to connect in his head, and the tension in his raised shoulders drains away. “Ah, hell. You’re the mossball.”
Both Nami and Usopp’s eyes jump upwards when Zoro groans, although it just makes Luffy snicker. “Call a guy ‘Curly’ one time-”
The old man snorts, cutting off the complaint with a wave of his hand. “After so long, I’m surprised you ever stopped in for your free meal, brat. These your friends?”
“My crew.”
A hint of approval flickers. “They’ll get half off, then. What all do you want?”
“Everything!” Luffy hollers, and just like that the hint is gone. Still- the old man slips a pen and notepad out of his apron pocket to jot down the rest of their orders, and gives Luffy a dubious glare before adding ‘one of everything’ underneath. Then he disappears back off to the swinging doors, and within moments they can hear him hollering over the clamor of pots and pans and whatever else happens in a restaurant kitchen.
At this point Zoro figures Sanji won’t put in an appearance until later, if he does at all, so it’s a pleasant surprise when blond hair he does recognize emerges just a minute later.
“Ah,” Usopp says. “Curly.”
“Sanji,” Zoro corrects. “Or you’ll get water thrown in your face.”
The cook has gotten taller than Zoro over the past three years, and walks with way more confidence than he’d had after getting newly released from captivity. The tray of drinks perched on one of his hands doesn’t so much as hint at tipping one way or another as Sanji smoothly strides across the room, dodging tables and waiters and customers, until he comes to a stop at their booth, other hand tucked in a pocket and that lone curly eyebrow raised in obvious judgement.
Zoro grumbles, “Don’t give me that look. Your restaurant moves every time I’ve tried to find it.”
That earns a blink, and then a snort, before a bottle of beer is thunked down between Zoro’s hands on the table. Luffy receives his milk with a little more care, and Usopp his two beers, and then Namie’s glass of plain water with a little paper umbrella is delivered with way too much exaggerated flourishing. Zoro can’t help but snigger when she remains unimpressed - and then yelp when Sanji kicks his shin. “Oi, don’t start that again.” Sanji folds his arms and smirks. “Yeah yeah, better than taking my head off, but still.”
“Uh...” Usopp’s head swivels back and forth, looking between them. “Have you two really only met once?”
“Yeah.”
“...uh-huh.”
Zoro frowns at the sniper. “What’s that supposed to mean.”
“It means,” Nami hums, smirking, “That you sure seem to understand exactly what he’s saying even without any words involved.”
“Trust me, he’s better without words,” which earns another kick landing hard enough to make Zoro swear worse than usual. “Would you knock that off-”
“-can’t believe you’re being so- ow! Hey!”
Instantly, Sanji’s head swivels around, to a smaller table where some jackass in a marine uniform is gripping his date’s arm, hissing in her ear as she squirms. And just like that the cook is off, reaching their seats in the blink of an eye. The same leg he kicked Zoro with swings up, high, and then collides with the marine’s head, hard. Jackass is flung clear out of his chair, across the room and nearly to the front door.
“Oh!” The girl seems stunned, although she loses a little of her alarm when Sanji turns and bows, smoothly plucking his own notepad out of a pocket to scribble something for her. “Oh- thank you, that- that would be lovely.”
Straightening up, Sanji gives a short whistle that brings a waiter bustling over. He also shares the note with that guy, adding an extra line underneath. The waiter nods. “And dessert, on the house, of course. This way please, miss, we have several private booths on the second floor balcony...”
The girl is escorted out, while Sanji snaps twice and points at her groaning date. Two other waiters quickly pick the marine up and drag him out the doors - where to, Zoro doesn’t know, and can’t say he cares. He keeps watching Sanji, who neatens the disturbed table, scoops up a big plate with some kind of breaded appetizer, barely-touched, and ambles back over.
“Hey, thanks!” Luffy cheers, when said appetizer is duly placed on their table. He inhales half of the little breaded things immediately, then, with his mouth full, “Y’re really strong!” Sanji huffs out a silent laugh, one corner of his mouth turning up in a grin. Luffy swallows. “You should join my pirate crew!”
The grin disappears.
Idiot cook retreats to the kitchen to hide after that. Well- okay, he does actually have a job cooking, Zoro’s not dumb enough to forget that, but Sanji never so much as shows a hint of his stupid curlybrow at the door when food’s sent out to their table through the whole meal. And there’s a lot sent out, thanks to Luffy eagerly scarfing down the majority of dishes set on their table.
“Last time I’ll underestimate an appetite,” grumbles the old geezer, ‘Chef Zeff’ one of the waiters called him, when he stomps out along with the dessert tray. “Just as well I didn’t say you could all eat for free.”
Luffy finishes slurping his ice cream and then laughs. “That’s okay! This was so great I’ll give you a really, really big tip when I come back to pay it.”
The man zeroes in on Zoro’s captain, squinting so hard his eyes are in danger of closing entirely. “What do you mean, when you come back to pay?”
“We’re putting this on my treasure tab! Once I find the One Piece, I’ll come back and settle up!” Luffy beams as if this is perfectly acceptable, even while Usopp stares at him like he’s insane, and Nami raises her eyes to the ceiling.
Zoro, though. Zoro watches Zeff, and spots it the moment a calculating gleam appears in the old chef’s eyes. “Better idea. You are going to come work off your ‘tab’ as my new chore boy for a few days.” That said, he snags the back of Luffy’s shirt, and promptly hauls him off towards the kitchen without another word.
“Um!” Usopp flaps a hand, eyes wide. “Should we, uh- do something?”
“...nah,” Zoro says. “We saw a bar out back, right?”
“We did,” Nami agrees, sighing. Then her gaze cuts to Zoro, and goes from despairing to suspicious. “Think he’s going to try and convince that friend of yours to join up while he’s in there?”
“Yep.” And Zoro would bet all three of his swords Chef Zeff thinks the exact same thing.