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This was it. Vaggie was finally going to do it.
She had spent months mulling over this idea. She had quietly brought it up with Husk one night, just before Angel had gotten back from the studio and a few hours after Charlie had gone to bed. He had looked at her as if she had absolutely lost her mind, but Niffty had been quick to pop up, declaring it to be the ultimate gesture of romance… seconded only by presenting someone with a bouquet of dead Mama Roaches, at least.
Niffty’s approval had been mildly concerning, but some small part of her had been reassured by it - of course, upon realizing that, she was only further concerned. She had tried to ask Alastor, once, and he had quickly locked elbows with her, turned on a dime, and declared to whoever was listening that they would be back by the end of the day and for someone to keep Charlie from panicking about it. The rest of the day had been spent situated at Rosie’s dining table while she gushed and cooed about how romantic it was. Alastor, too, seemed off-puttingly invested in the idea, filling in the gaps for Rosie where Vaggie had fumbled over her words. She had expected neutrality if not outright disgust from the Radio Demon. But interest? Much less, encouragement? Over the years as the hotel had settled she and Alastor had grown less hostile to each other - even friendly, some days. They would spend the mornings together in quiet silence, both enjoying their coffee and reading the newspaper. Occasionally they would chat and the routine was nice, but they were hardly best friends. And yet, he had been, by far, the most encouraging party in this entire endeavor. If Vaggie didn’t know better, she’d claim that he was getting something out of this.
Actually, no, scratch that. He definitely was getting something out of this. Undoubtedly, as soon as the news came out, he’d dangle the idea that he had helped in orchestrating it over Lucifer’s head like a feral cat taunting a domesticated one with a fresh kill - smug and completely unrepentant. It would, without a doubt, drive Lucifer up the wall. Vaggie almost felt a little bad that she might be amused by the entire ordeal. After all, despite constant and gentle corrections from Charlie, he still managed to call her the wrong name most of the time. So sue her if she wanted to hold onto this tiny bit of petty revenge against her maybe-one-day-potential-father-in-law.
But it all led up to this moment.
Vaggie sat on her shared bed, Charlie humming away in the bathroom as she wound down for the night. Her hands were clasped tightly, thumbs twiddling as she fought off the temptation to squirm in anticipation. “Babe?” Vaggie called out, hoping that she might be able to hurry Charlie along just a little bit.
Charlie poked her head out, eyes shining with joy, “Yeah?”
“Can I… ask you something?”
Charlie clearly caught onto the hesitance in her voice. Her posture changed as she stepped into the room, her entire attention focused on the Fallen Angel in front of her. “Of course you can. What’s up, Vaggie?”
“Have you…” she trailed off, letting out a small sigh. Her shoulders tensed and she squeezed her eye shut, forcing the words out in one rapid stream, “wouldyouwanttodoasoulexhangewithme?”
A Soul Exchange.
Possibly the most intimate thing a couple could do. The ultimate act of devotion. The ultimate sign of their affection for one another. To sell your soul to the other, and them to return the gesture in kind. It was just as much an act of loyalty as it was one of protection. Deals could be made without much fear of being swindled of their soul. Reassurances of the other’s well-being were all but a chain tap away.
Vaggie had thought about it and she wanted nothing more than to give Charlie her everything.
It was quiet in response.
It was pressing and heavy Vaggie’s heart thudded in her chest. Her eye preemptively burned with as-of-yet unshed tears and she hesitantly pried it open, peering over to her darling demoness. Charlie stood as stiff as a plank of wood, eyes wide, mouth parted slightly in shock.
“Charlie?” Vaggie quietly prompted. Her eye burned as traitorous tears began to slip out. She had support from the others and plenty of encouragement, for the most part, and yet, panic still clawed at her. This was a bad idea. A terrible idea. Why would Charlie want to take her up on it? They would be binding themselves to each other forever. Lucifer and Lilith had never even done a Soul Exchange, so why would Charlie want to do one with her?
Charlie shook herself out of her stupor, rushing over. She knelt on the ground in front of Vaggie, clasping her hands around the Fallen Angel’s. “Oh Vaggie,” She cooed softly, squeezing her hands gently, “Why are you upset?”
She wanted to scrub at her cheeks and hide the evidence of her sudden onset shame for asking such a stupid question, but Charlie held her hands in place. “It… It was a dumb question. I’m sorry. We- We can ignore it. G-go to bed…” her shoulders began to tremble and she hunched in on herself, trying to hide her face from Charlie as much as she could manage.
Charlie let go of her hands to cup her face, her thumb gently brushing away the tears that spilled over. “It wasn’t a dumb question, Vaggie. You just caught me off guard.” Rising up just enough to meet her face, the princess peppered it with soft kisses. “That’s a big ask, and… I’d like some time to think about it, okay?”
Gradually the tears began to slow, and Vaggie took a deep, shaking breath. She nodded, pressing her forehead against Charlie’s, “Yeah. Okay.”
“I love you,” Charlie whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.
Vaggie returned it, the press tender and sweet. She pulled away, lifting her hands to rest them over Charlie’s, “I love you, too.”
Vaggie should have seen it coming. Charlie asked for a week to think about it. A week where she would be traveling to one of the other cities in the Pride Ring to set up a new Hazbin Hotel. Lucifer had gone with her for this one, and… it hurt. It was enough that Vaggie couldn’t help but sit in a bit of a pity party, flicking a grape around her plate, a half-empty beer sitting among the several other bottles she had gone through.
Husk grunted just loud enough to finally pull her attention away from the oh-so-interesting affairs of a grape rolling along ceramic. “What?” Her tone was flat as she picked up her beer, slowly sipping it.
“You just gonna sit in your little fucking pity parade for another night?”
“What of it?” Vaggie challenged.
Husk rolled his eyes, setting the glass he was cleaning aside. “Look kid, just ‘cause she asked for some time to think about what’ch’er askin’ her doesn’t mean she’s gonna say no. You know the Princess. She’s gotta think of every contingency and way that shit could go wrong. Pretty sure the Boss has fuckin’ drilled that into her at this point, well beyond what it used to be. If anything, I bet you she’s gonna come back here, happy as can fuckin’ be, riding a rainbow, and tell you yes.”
“You don’t know that,” Vaggie whispered, her gaze returning to the grape on her plate.
“I do,” Husk reasserted. “I’ve had enough time watchin’ the two of you to figure out how this whole fuckin’ dynamic works. Without the Princess, you get all sad and start seein’ the worst in shit. There was a time when she couldn’t see a downside without you around.” Husk reached over, taking the nearly-finished beer from her hands. “Maybe it’s time you work on yourself a little, kid. Balance yourself out some more so when you do forge that Soul Exchange with her, you can function just fine on your own, too.”
“I… don’t know, Husk,” Vaggie let out a small sigh, “I didn’t survive by being optimistic.”
“Charlie did.”
Their situations hadn’t been the same by any means. Nobody could have hurt or killed Charlie but… that didn’t mean they couldn’t have found ways to take advantage of her optimism. To twist it until it suited their needs just fine and they had beat her down just enough that they could do as they pleased without retribution.
Letting out a small sigh, Vaggie nodded. “Okay. I… guess I see where you’re coming from.”
“Damn right, you do.”
And so, over the next few days, while waiting for Charlie to come back home, Vaggie tried to force herself into a more positive mindset. She offered quite compliments to the staff and the guests and offered positive outcomes where her natural inclination was to see where everything could go wrong. She offered more smiles, instead of scowls, but it all felt so… fake. The longer she went trying to be positive around the residents and the staff, the more it felt like she was trying to stretch herself to fit a mold that she just simply didn’t fit in.
Charlie came home and Vaggie… still didn’t know what to do. She continued to try and offer smiles and nice words, but as soon as she was alone, Vaggie’s mind swirled with anxiety that ate away at her. She rolled over the reactions to what she said, worried that the residents and staff had taken it the wrong way. Charlie hadn’t spoken with her yet. She had given a tired wave, a kiss on the cheek, and mumbled that she was exhausted and was going to catch up on some sleep. Which left Vaggie alone in the staff parlor, worrying the hem of her skirt between her fingers as she chewed on the inside of her lip.
She had tried to be positive.
She had.
It didn’t work.
The press of considering all the negative outcomes and interpretations of almost every situation still ate at her, leaving Vaggie feeling like she was stranded in the middle of an ocean that was far too calm when it should have been overtaken by a raging storm.
A gentle knock on the door only just pulled her out of her thoughts, “Vaggie?” Charlie gently called, exhaustion heavy in her voice, “You okay?”
Her head jerked up as she turned to face Charlie, “I thought you went to bed? You look exhausted,” She stood up and quickly ushered her girlfriend over to the couch.
“Couldn’t sleep,” she yawned, pulling Vaggie into her lap. She nuzzled her face into the Fallen Angel’s shoulder with a small hum, a small smile visibly pulling at her lips at the indignant squeak Vaggie let out at the suddenness of the action. “Eventually left our room. Alastor was waiting around the corner to scare the shit out of me,” she snorted, her breath warm and gently tickling Vaggie’s neck, “and then he oh-so-politely informed me you were unhappily stewing in your anxiety in the staff room.”
“I just-” Vaggie began.
“It’s fine,” Charlie spoke softly, cutting her off. “I get it, Vaggie. You’re worried that my lack of a quick answer means it’s going to be a no. And you’re probably also worried about your sudden positive attitude towards everyone being taken wrong.”
Vaggie sputtered, squirming in Charlie’s lap until she had managed to turn around to face the woman. “Who told you about that?”
“Our favorite hotelier,” Charlie giggled softly, “I don’t think Al would ever admit to it, but I think he’s a little concerned by your sudden shift in attitude. Any reason for it?”
“I… had a conversation with Husk and… he talked about how I needed to be more… balanced, I guess? That… you did a good job of seeing the pros and cons, nowadays and I just… saw the cons, still.”
Charlie tilted her head, a small frown dusting her lips. She shook her head, letting out a small sigh, “and this is why our bartender is not one of our therapists. Husk can be a good friend, Vaggie, but he doesn’t always give out the best advice. Do you feel like you don’t see the positive side of things most of the time?”
“Recently or in general?”
“Both.”
Vaggie chewed on the inside of her lip, “Recently it’s been a lot of negative. In general… I thought I was pretty good at seeing both sides.” Even if her immediate reaction was to consider all of the worst outcomes first.
Charlie nodded, the gesture slowed down a bit courtesy of her own tiredness. “I bet I can take a guess at why you’re more inclined to see the negative side of things.” She gently pinched Vaggie’s side, “almost like you’re really anxious about asking a really big question that determines the next step in our relationship.”
Vaggie answered with silence, her gaze averting. She wrapped her arms around Charlie, fingers gripping her shirt tightly, “I just don’t want to lose you.”
“And you won’t,” Charlie whispered, “I had a lot of time to think about your suggestion, Vaggie. I… I don’t even know if either of us have a soul to barter with. But… I’m willing to find out.”
Vaggie pulled away, her eye going wide, “Seriously?!”
Charlie laughed and nodded, the sound light and breezy, “Yeah, seriously. But… let’s take a nap first, okay? I’m exhausted.”
Vaggie couldn’t bite back the smile that tugged at her lips as she pulled Charlie into a tighter hug. Charlie held her back just as tightly, easing the two of them downwards until they were spread out across the entire couch in the staff lounge.
“I love you so much, Charlie,” Vaggie whispered. “I want to be everything I can be and more, for you.”
“I want to be everything and more for you too,” Charlie whispered back, her breath ghosting over the top of Vaggie’s head. “You mean everything to me, and I can’t think of anyone I’d trust more with my soul, should it exist.”
“I wouldn’t want anyone else to have mine, either,” Vaggie lifted her head just enough to press a soft, chaste kiss to Charlie’s lips. The Princess returned it with a slow, syrupy motion before her head fell back against the arm of the couch. “But first, I think a nap is in order.”