Chapter Text
“Y’know when most people do nice things for their friends, they're a nice person,” Tommy muttered as he dodged a punch. “ But no, when I do it I'm a vigilante and ‘a menace’.”
The next punch grazed his face and Tommy took the chance to hit the hero in the side with the pipe in his hand. The hero took the hit with a grunt and a step back, giving Tommy the chance to turn and book it in the opposite direction.
Now you might be wondering why Tommy is currently running across the rooftops away from the #6 hero, Siren. That is a great question because Tommy has no fucking clue either. It all started with Tubbo.
Because Tommy is a great friend, when Tubbo asked him to cover patrol for him because something something Quackity, Tommy agreed. Tommy now regrets that decision as he can hear Siren catching up to him again.
“Stop!” Siren shouted, power lacing his words. The command tries to latch on to Tommy’s limbs, but Tommy is too cool to follow things like established power rules, so the command slips from him like water. He sped up as the enraged yell from the hero reached his ears.
He managed to get across a few more rooftops and had just managed to land on another before a weight hit him from behind. They both hit the ground and the fighting starts up again. Siren has his hands around Tommy’s torso and starts to go for the cuffs in his belt when Tommy manages to break his hold and hit him in the side. Tommy then flips over and tackles Siren. They wrestle on the ground for a while before Siren manages to pin in again. Tommy can feel a black eye forming and Siren has a bloody nose. They sit there for a second, catching their breath.
“Why did my power not work?” Siren demands and Tommy can feel the power on his tongue, but again he is too much of a big man for shit like that so.
“Aw it's okay we all have off days, man,” Tommy replied, mock sympathy in his tone. The grip Siren has on him tightens and Tommy winces.
“What did you do you, child?” Siren nearly screamed, which Tommy thought was a little unnecessary because their faces are only about a foot apart.
“I didn’t do shit man, and to be honest that sounds like a personal problem,” Tommy stated, before shifting his legs and kneeing Siren in the gut. This dissolved into them wrestling on top of a roof again. At some point, Siren managed to get a grip on Tommy’s hood and in return Tommy headbutted him, making him let go of the thing hiding Tommy’s hybrid status. After Tommy pulled Siren’s hair the fight developed kinda into a slap fight. The result was the two of them laying next to each other as they try to catch their breath.
“Are you going to arrest me now?” Tommy asks, sitting up to fix his mask and hood
“Give me a fucking second,” Siren bites, still laying on the floor. Tommy notices the blood from his nose is starting to slide down the side of his face and winces. He kinda hopes he didn’t break it.
“Oh wow, is the great hero Siren tired after a fight with a vigilante,” Tommy asks, tone mocking.
“Oh Shut up, Red,” Siren snaps back, finally managing to sit up.
“Red?” Tommy asks, giving the hero a questioning look.
“It’s your vigilante name dumbass,” Siren replied, wiping the blood off his face with the side of his trench coat.
“I reckon that is the most unoriginal vigilante name one could think of, ever,” Tommy states. “And also that is not my vigilante name, use something else.”
“Like you could come up with anything better,” Siren replies.
“Well I'll have you know I have, I think that my name should be Mayhem,” Tommy states proudly. It took him a bit to think of it and he got permission to use her title, which was only fair because she was using his.
“Oh, that is pretty good,” Siren admitted, then paused as a thought had hit him. “Though Mischief might come after you for trying to steal her brand.”
“It would be an interesting fight.” Tommy shrugged. “Though you have to admit mine is better than yours.” The squawk of indignation that left the hero was hilarious.
“I’ll have you know that my hero's name is great and way better than yours,” The hero snapped back.
“No way big man, yours gives away your power so you have no element of surprise, while mine on the other hand is vague and gives away nothing.” Tommy states proudly, chest puffed.
“I’m going to arrest you now,” Siren said, grabbing at Tommy’s arm. It was Tommy’s turn to squawk in indignation, as he scooted away quickly.
“That’s not fair!” Tommy shouted as he struggled to get his feet under him and keep out of range of the hero.
“Oh shut up,” Siren shouted back as he began to chase Tommy around the rooftop. They managed to get across from each, bracing to tackle the other. When something happened that caused Tommy to stiffen and Siren to look at him with confusion.
His phone rang. The bubbly tune of The Able Sisters played from the phone in his pocket. The ringtone had been a joke, his favorite tune for his favorite person.
“Is your ringtone the Able Sisters?” Siren asked as if such a concept was too much for his pea brain.
“Yeah and want about it,” Tommy asked as the tune faded out, the call going to voicemail.
“I– just why though,” Siren asked, hands raised as if he could grasp the answer with his hands.
“I think you are a wron–,” Tommy began before he was cut off by an unfamiliar song (something about smoking weed?) filling the air. The noise was coming from the hero, and for some reason, the hero seemed to blush as the song went on.
As the song faded away, the two of them stood there staring at each other. Tommy is not sure how long he stood there, could have been seconds or hours. They just stood there staring, Tommy’s stiff posture and a red blush covering the hero's face.
The only thing that broke them out of that weird trace was when both of their phones rang at the same time, the unpleasant mixture shocking them.
“So I kinda have to go take this call, so…bye.” Tommy watched in a strange fascination as the hero who had chased him halfway across the city turned and ran in the other direction.
“Oh, he is definitely a wrong’un.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
Tommy collapsed onto the couch, letting his body relax as began to heal the injuries from tonight. He kinda wants to go to bed so he can wake fully healed in the morning, but he has to do something first.
After the third call, he sent his mom a text that he would call her as soon as he was home and his phone was silent for the rest of the trip back home.
“Hey mum,” Tommy said on the phone, slightly wincing as he brushed a still unhealed bruise.
“How was your patrol, Tommy,” her voice was full of amusement, and Tommy just know that the crows had already told her all about his patrol.
“Patrol was fine, mum.” Tommy sighed, relaxing more into the couch and releasing his glamor. Talking to his mom always made Tommy feel relaxed. “How was your day, mom?”
“My day was great, that brings me to what I wanted to talk to you about. Do you remember Phil?” Tommy can hear the glee in his mother’s voice when she says Phil’s name.
“Yes, I remember Phil,” Tommy replies as he absently picks at the pants of his Mayhem uniform. Though Tommy has never actually met Phil, his mother has spoken about him enough to have a decent grasp on the guy.
“So today he took me on this super cute date at the place where we met, and he proposed!” his mother announced. “So we are engaged now.”
“Congrats mum, when's the wedding?” Tommy asks, a soft smile on his face. He was happy mum had found someone, she was always so lonely before Phil.
“We aren't sure, but that's what I wanted to talk about. I think that you should meet Phil and his sons before the wedding,” the smile on Tommy’s mouth fell at his mother’s words. He knew that this was coming someday, but he had hoped he could push it off a little longer. “Now I know how you feel about meeting Phil, but just this once.”
Tommy sighed, “When am I going to meet them.”
“Oh thank you, dear, Phil is hosting a small dinner party for all of you to get to know each other better, it is in about 2 days.” his mom practically cheered, and a small smile broke onto Tommy’s face. At least his mom was happy with the arrangements.
“Hey, I have to go change. I'll call you tomorrow after work.” Tommy said after looking at the clock, and realizing it was nearly 2 am
“Ok, sleep well sweetheart, love you.”
“Love you too, mum.”
By the time Tubbo and Ranboo got back from whatever they were doing, Tommy had showered and changed. The two walk in looking no worse for wear, so Tommy offers them some of the dinners he made and they pile onto the couch.
“How did whatever you did tonight go,” Tommy asks, as Tubbo tucks into his side.
“Tubbo and Quackity threatened some dudes, I just chatted with Charlie for a bit,” Ranboo replied, running clawed fingers through Tommy’s hair.
“How was patrol, Boss Man,” Tubbo asks, voice slightly muffled from where his face was shoved in Tommy’s side.
“Honestly, it was shit, I wrestled Siren on a rooftop for like 30 minutes and then mum called me,” Tommy replied, leaning into Ranboo’s hand.
“Did you win?” Tubbo asked, pulling his head up.
“Course, King. That wrong’un ran off, so I reckon that makes me the winner,” Tommy states prideful.
“What did Mumza call about,” Ranboo asked.
“Basically, Mumza’s engaged now and that means I have to meet Phil and his sons” Tommy sighs. “And there's likely no way I can get out of it.”
“Why have you not met them before,” Ranboo asks.
“Because Ranboob, I don't want to,” Tommy replies, defensive.
“It's because Tommy has Daddy issues,” Tubbo interjects, grabbing the hand about to swat him on the head.
“I DO NOT HAVE DADDY ISSUES!” Tommy shouted, jumping up from the couch. “I simply have no need for father figures in my life and he is trying to become a father figure in my life!”
“Yeah that sounds like daddy issues Tommy,” Ranboo said, and Tommy screeched.
“Oh, poor little baby can’t handle a man trying to become a father figure despite being like the god of Family,” Tubbo mocks.
“How dare you? First off I am not a baby, second I am the god of Chaos and Loyalty, not Family, so get it right!” Tommy snapped back, arms crossed.
“Just get back on the couch boss man,” Tubbo sighed. Tommy deflated before sitting back down.
“Hey at the very least, you might like them,” Ranboo offered, and the only response he got was a long groan.