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Kakashi hated this.
Bleeding and his vision blurry as his team tried to take him back to Konoha. He was used to this, been badly beaten before his ANBU days, had his arm broken or worse, stabbed. However, his injury right now was something Sakura can’t heal on the spot, and he was losing blood badly.
“Hang on Kakashi-sensei,” He heard Naruto from the side, even though Kakashi had his eyes closed, he can hear the tears from the young shinobi.
Yeah, he had watched his team grow and he had saved them far too many times but now, just experiencing Naruto, Sakura, and Sai all worried about him, man was he getting old.
Kakashi groaned again, holding onto the stab wound on his abdomen as he felt the bandage started to stain with blood. This was no good.
Oh yeah, back to the topic where he has been hurt worst. For Kakashi, he wanted to say to his team that they don’t need to worry because he was Kakashi—it doesn’t matter if he died, at least he died for his students.
However, right now, Kakashi wished he won’t die.
Kakashi had made a promise to never leave for a mission without being in good terms with Iruka. He always leaves with a kiss and a promise to return, but when he left for this mission, Iruka was mad at him. They fought about how he doesn’t need any help with a certain problem, and of course, Iruka always wanted to help and Kakashi doesn’t want to bother him, and arguments flew and now they were arguing on how Iruka doesn’t feel his love for him.
Of course, Kakashi was hurt. He assumed, of all people, Iruka won’t doubt how important he was to him.
They always fought, always disagreed to some terms but Iruka still managed to be by his side. It was hard at first, Iruka confessed his feelings and Kakashi was jumbled up because he doesn’t know if he can bring love to the sensei that probably don’t deserve him. But the sensei was insistent, took care of him as a lover would.
He felt love. He felt that he was somehow important again.
But Kakashi was stubborn, he pushed him away, said he doesn’t need anyone, pushed himself in the dark because everyone who loved him will eventually disappear and he knew Iruka would so too, but the sensei was persistent.
He actually reprimanded him how he thought wrong, basically threatened him with a good time until Iruka kissed him and Kakashi accepted, slowly, but he knew Iruka was very important to him even though he showed it less.
Kakashi hoped Iruka felt his love through his actions because his wounds were hurting and his head was slowly losing its grip to life. He knew Iruka would be devastated if he did die on the spot without making up with him and Kakashi doesn’t want that.
He wanted Iruka to be happy.
Before he doesn’t really have any reason to live but now—Kakashi can feel tears pooling his closed eyes and they jumped from one tree to another with Naruto and Sai holding onto him.
Kakashi hasn’t even said I love you to Iruka yet.
Regrets always come at the end, Kakashi thought as he tightened his hold onto Naruto.
“I’m sorry…”
“Huh? Kakashi-sensei!...”
-
It hurts all over but Kakashi found himself awake, the hospital light surprisingly didn’t almost blind him because it was dimly lit. The window was open, the light from the moon illuminated towards him gently, soft winds passed through, and his arms were cemented.
Kakashi groaned softly, he wanted to sit down but the sting on his abdomen, shoulders, and thighs stopped him. Oh yeah, he remembered that he was stabbed.
So, he managed to be alive.
Iruka.
As if on cue, the door to his room opened and came to Iruka wearing a comfortable long-sleeved shirt and pants, his headband not on his forehead, and he has some paper bags in his hands.
His hair was in a messy bun but Iruka managed to make Kakashi’s breath stop for a while.
Iruka didn’t seem to notice that he was awake because he casually walked towards the nightstand beside him with a sigh escaping his lips.
He looked so beautiful, Kakashi wondered what Iruka saw in him.
“’Ruka…”
“Shit- Kakashi!” Iruka dropped the bag not so gently, his graceful actions from earlier was a complete opposite of the flustered Iruka.
“You’ re—you’re finally awake!” There were tears pooling his eyes and Iruka wanted to hug him, but he stopped himself because he knew he would crush Kakashi. Instead, he held Kakashi’s hand as a tear escaped his eyes.
Kakashi’s breath hitched.
No one cried for him.
But you, oh god.
“You’re finally awake…” Iruka repeated, so much love was laced on his voice. He wanted to hug Iruka right now, kiss him senseless and fu—
“I’ve missed you. You were asleep for a month,” Iruka hiccupped, still holding onto Kakashi hand as he knelt down next to the bed, snuggling the silver-haired man’s hand closer to his cheeks. “I thought you—when Naruto arrived he was crying, and Sakura was-”
“Iruka…”
Even though he was a mess, a coward, and a heartless bastard, Iruka was still there. Next to him.
“Kakashi, I was so worried. I’m sorry! Please let’s not fight anymore before missions. Kakashi, damn it. I—I don’t know what I would do,” Iruka sobbed and Kakashi’s heart broke.
From all the stupid things he had done, Iruka was still there. Next to him.
“Kakashi…” Iruka paused, tear-stained cheeks and puffy eyes, “Thank you for waking up,” But he was still smiling.
Iruka gave him a chance when he himself can’t even give himself a chance. It wasn’t easy, but Iruka was still there. Next to him.
“I love you,”
Iruka’s hiccup was cut short as Kakashi looked at him sincerely.
“I love you,” Kakashi repeated. Like how Iruka repeatedly took care of him.
“I love you,” Repeated it like how Iruka repeatedly endured him.
“I love you,”
Silence. Both men stared at each other, feelings jumbled and hearts beating so fast. Kakashi was the first one to move, the hand that snuggled Iruka’s cheek broke free and wiped the tears away ever so gently.
Iruka was still next to him.
“Iruka, I love you,”
Iruka suddenly stood up and leaned over, hands on the side of Kakashi’s head as he dropped a kiss onto his forehead with tears still streaming down.
Kakashi released a sigh of relief.
“I love you, too…” Iruka replied with so much honesty that Kakashi can’t help but to get teary too.
“Please get better soon, Kakashi.”
“Yes, sensei…”
Oh, I always let you down (I always let you down)
You're shattered on the ground (shattered on the ground)
But still I find you there
Next to me
-
A few months later, Kakashi got a call from the Hokage that he was needed somewhere to investigate. He missed a lot of missions, and Kakashi was ready to take them again. However, for now, he was given light assignments.
He packed his things, ready to go somewhere again with his team. After he put on his bag, he exited the room only to be greeted by Iruka.
“You ready?” The long-haired man asked with a soft smile on his face.
“Yes,” He walked up to him and pressed a kiss on his forehead. “I love you,” Kakashi said before kissing his lips fully.
Iruka’s cheeks were blushing as they parted, and honestly, he was worried about Kakashi going on a mission again but he knew the other wanted to serve Konoha, and he knew it will only be bad if he stopped Kakashi in doing what he liked.
“I love you, too. I will wait for your return,” Iruka smiled, fixing Kakashi’s mask and headband. Iruka’s smile was blinding and Kakashi cleared his throat, said goodbye then closed the door behind.
He stood still. Mind replaying the smile of Iruka, the kindness of Iruka. Just Iruka.
The past few months of Kakashi’s recovery was hard, he can’t eat alone, he can’t wash his face alone but Iruka was there. He took care of him, accompanied him in the hospital, even doing paper works there just to accompany him.
Kakashi suddenly opened the door again and Iruka squeaked as he looked back at the shinobi.
“Forgot something?” Iruka asked.
Kakashi nodded, walked briskly towards him before capturing Iruka’s lips again.
So thank you for taking a chance on me
I know it isn't easy
But I hope to be worth it
So thank you for taking a chance on me
I know it isn't easy
But I hope to be worth it