xanthypia



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    The Swiss National League doesn’t care about the legendary Hollander-Rozanov rivalry. When the MLH can’t negotiate with the Hockey Players’ Union in time to prevent a hockey lockout at the start of the 2015 season, the Zürich Lions jump at the chance to sign both Shane and Ilya to short-term contracts. For four months in Switzerland, they share a team, a line, a house, and a bed. 

    Then the lockout ends in January, and it’s time to go back. Back to different countries, cities, lives. Beds.

    Reentry is harder than expected.

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    18 Feb 2026

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    "Troy," Roz said, "We are on deserted island."

    "We're probably just in the Keys."

    "In the Keys on deserted island, yes! Fuck!" Rozanov said. Barrett was startled by the outburst; Rozanov's shoulders dropped. He was still flipping his phone around in his hands. "Sorry. Fuck."

    "Wow. Did you just apologize for something?"

    Rozanov kicked a rock.

    "It could be a lot worse," Barrett said. "I mean, imagine if you'd been stuck out here with Boston, you guys would've already killed each other. Lord of the Flies style."

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    13 Feb 2026

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    Who.

    Who taught Shane about this.

    Ilya is going to kill someone, and then himself. Not Shane. Never Shane. But he is going to have to kill someone with his bare hands.

    Or: Shane invents advanced blowjob positions with his own beautiful freaky mind, thereby unintentionally turning Ilya into a danger to himself and others.

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    11 Feb 2026

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    In 2021, Shane Hollander reveals his relationship with former rival Ilya Rozanov to the shock of chronically online people worldwide, who’ve spent the last decade convincing the world he’s secretly in love with his teammate Hayden Pike

    feng (she/her) @flowerfeng · Apr 3, 2021
    gotta feel bad for shane hollander. like imagine everyone wishing you were in a secret gay relationship. and you gotta spend your career swearing you’re not in a secret gay relationship. but you ARE in a secret gay relationship. just w the wrong guy

    booboo the fool @cinnacin · Apr 4, 2021
    shane hollander w a hand on the bible: no im not in a decade-long secret relationship w fellow hockey player hayden pike
    roger cromwell: ok say it again without the hayden pike part 
    shane hollander: sweats nervously 

    (Or, imagine if #Shayden was the #LarryStylinson of the HR/GC universe)

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    05 Feb 2026

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    Hockey is a rough sport. Everyone knows that. You go down, you get back up. That’s the game. When Ilya Rozanov goes down on the ice, the Boston Bears are already moving to defend their captain. No one expects Shane Hollander, captain of the Montreal Voyageurs, to be the one who throws the first punch.

    Or: the Boston Bears figure out Ilya and Shane’s relationship first—and decide that instead of letting their captain move to fucking Ottawa, they’ll just kidnap his boyfriend instead. Shane Hollander would make a better Bear anyway.

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    05 Feb 2026