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detailed notes on how to be spontaneous by missparker
Fandoms: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
27 Jul 2025
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When Penelope loses her job, Colin invites her to go with him to his next destination. Penelope isn't good at spontaneity, but she can't say no to Colin and finds herself swept up on the trip of a lifetime.
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“I guess if there were no shorts attached, you cheerleaders would just go around flashing everybody every time you jumped in the air, or flipped around, or did a… uh, walkover. Who knows what that kind of overt sexuality would trigger in the God-fearing teens of Middle America? I mean, anything could happen.”
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eddie follows chrissy to the empty gymnasium after school. he probably shouldn't have.
Series
- Part 7 of porny oneshots
Bookmarked by stultifies
25 Nov 2024
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Tiger Stripes by lixabiz for Stillpink, murderbymushrooms
Fandoms: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
09 Aug 2024
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He didn’t like to admit it, but the truth was he’d always had a thing for her boobs. It started a couple of years before the Yellow Bra Incident, back when Penelope had just turned thirteen and started growing them. Which, of course, coincided with Colin, at the time fifteen-going-on-sixteen, becoming obsessed with breasts. Not hers in particular, just breasts in general, but… well, Penelope was a little plump. Which meant her budding breasts were a little plump as well. She had developed earlier and faster than his sister, who remained a beanpole for many years yet.
He was very good at compartmentalising, it turned out.
Pen was his little sister’s bestie, yes; but Pen’s breasts were an entirely different thing altogether.
(aka the AU where Penelope becomes an instagram lingerie model and Colin loses his mind.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,166
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 736
- Kudos:
- 4,896
- Bookmarks:
- 1,100
- Hits:
- 130,270
Bookmarked by stultifies
22 Aug 2024
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among the wildflowers by talkfast
Fandoms: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
23 May 2024
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Summary
“Oh.” Eloise sat back and raised a hand to her mouth, considering. “That is a neat solution. If you two were married, then our troubles would no longer plague us.”
“Pardon?” Penelope said, heartbeat thudding in her ears.
“Excuse me?” Colin said at the very same moment.
Despite knowing that this is an awful idea, Penelope agrees to a marriage of convenience. She settles into an idyllic house in the countryside to await letters from her husband travelling abroad.
Time will tell whether the marriage proves truly convenient—or something more than any of them could have anticipated.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,542
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 207
- Kudos:
- 3,361
- Bookmarks:
- 843
- Hits:
- 51,499
Bookmarked by stultifies
17 Jul 2024
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something more tender, still than friendship by Cinnamonbookworm
Fandoms: Bridgerton (TV)
31 May 2024
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Eloise no longer wants to change the world. She just wants the world to leave her alone.
Or: Comp-het is a bitch, but so is Cressida Cowper.
Bookmarked by stultifies
19 Jun 2024
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Before her last year at Oxford, Eloise Bridgerton is hiding away in Bath for the Summer. Cressida Cowper is doing the exact same. It would be best if they avoided each other.
Funnily enough, they don't.
Bookmarked by stultifies
16 Jun 2024
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Summary
Penelope still hasn't told Eloise about her thing with Colin. Eloise still hasn't told Penelope about her thing with Cressida. And Bridgertons are infamously bad at keeping secrets.
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“You need not be an expert in great auks to win him over," Eloise assures her, righting Colin's coat across her shoulders, hilariously oversized. “You just need to distract.”
Eloise attempts to teach Cressida about flightless birds before her next meeting with Lord Debling. Cressida distracts.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,229
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 63
- Kudos:
- 1,146
- Bookmarks:
- 129
- Hits:
- 7,174
Bookmarked by stultifies
20 May 2024
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“Go back where you came from, go back to the wilderness! Return to the dirt where you crawled from. Go hang from your trees, drown in your damned lake, burn, starve, rot all by yourself. Leave us alone!”
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Five years after they were rescued from the wilderness, Laura Lee lived by herself, pretending she wasn't desperately waiting for a sign, a new purpose, and a call from the love of her life, who vanished from the world on the day they returned home. Then, one fateful night, she received a call from Mari, requesting a very particular kind of help. Not only the evil power they thought they left behind in the woods was back, and only Laura Lee had the experience to banish it.
Lottie Matthews was also back.
Bookmarked by stultifies
06 Feb 2024
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Summary
On the morning after he gets back from Vegas, Tony takes the orange juice from the fridge. When he turns around to reach for a glass, Christopher is sitting on the counter.
“I still love you, T,” he says without moving his mouth, his legs swinging. “I’ve always loved you. What you did to me doesn’t change that.” His eyes are mournful and his face is pale as frost.
“Jesus H. Christ,” Tony manages before his vision goes hazy, then pitch black, and he hits the floor.
~
Or: an AU of the day after Tony gets back from Vegas in S6, wherein Christopher haunts him.
Bookmarked by stultifies
08 Jan 2024
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Hermione finds herself planted against the wall with Malfoy kissing a trail of fire down her skin.
“We could have that,” he croaks.
Hermione shakes her head vehemently. “They love each other. We despise each other.”
He pulls back and Hermione flinches at the expression he’s wearing. He looks like someone who has seen something terrible — eyes unfocused and face taking on a sort of stricken expression.
“We don’t need to love each other,” he says in a strangled whisper that holds the weight of words unspoken. And then in a sort of desperate plea, “We don’t even need to like each other.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,317
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 15
- Comments:
- 246
- Kudos:
- 3,964
- Bookmarks:
- 1,067
- Hits:
- 90,165
Bookmarked by stultifies
19 Dec 2023
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Raised Expectations by logogram
Fandoms: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
15 Oct 2023
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When Genevieve tells Penelope how she can please a man with her mouth, Penelope decides to try her newfound knowledge out on Colin.
Bookmarked by stultifies
11 Dec 2023
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this little girl breaks furniture, this little girl breaks laws by Bandydear
Fandoms: Yellowjackets (TV)
03 Sep 2023
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Summary
“You know that song, that’s like ‘you’ve got a fast car, I want a ticket to anywhere, maybe we can make a deal?” Jackie says quietly when Nat returns to the porch.
“You mean the song called: Fast Car?” Nat follows her gaze to the truck. The last piece of her old man, and the only one really worth keeping.
She returns to look at Jackie, noticing the gym bag stuffed with clothes and cash.
“You’re not serious,” Nat scoffs with a laugh.
“Look, I don’t know about you, but I’m not ready to throw in the towel and die in fucking Wiskayok, New Jersey.”--
Follows roughly 10 years of one Natalie Scatorccio and one Jacqueline Taylor cohabitating in a Chelsea apartment while they learn how to be adults.
Series
- Part 1 of two little girlsverse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 155,211
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 740
- Kudos:
- 3,587
- Bookmarks:
- 1,179
- Hits:
- 144,532
Bookmarked by stultifies
05 Dec 2023
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Jackie snatches up the magazine and stares at it with bulging eyes. Nope, she thinks. This doesn’t mean anything. It’s only a date. Months and numbers stop mattering when you’re surrounded by indeterminate miles of pure, utter nothingness, so this month and number don’t matter to her one bit. Not anymore. She’s expired. She’s gone.
(Or: Jackie relives the day of the crash again. Then again. And again. She's going to fix this. She just has to be convinced that it's worth fixing first.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 64,612
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 366
- Kudos:
- 2,095
- Bookmarks:
- 472
- Hits:
- 38,428
Bookmarked by stultifies
01 Dec 2023
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1986 really was Eddie Munson's year. He graduated. Moved to Chicago. Corroded Coffin started to gain a following. He made new friends and got a cool new job.
Everything was great.
Now if he could just survive until 1987, things would be perfect.
(or the Russian Doll AU that nobody asked for)
Bookmarked by stultifies
07 Oct 2023
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Summary
Somebody stole the Hawkins High Spirit Stick, and nobody thinks Chrissy Cunningham can get it back.
Except Eddie!
Series
- Part 1 of Spirit Stick
Bookmarked by stultifies
06 Oct 2023
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On the Virtues of Inexhaustible Burning by PacificRimbaud
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
23 Dec 2022
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Summary
In which Draco Malfoy wrestles geology and Hermione receives several gifts.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,000
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 9
- Comments:
- 240
- Kudos:
- 4,138
- Bookmarks:
- 921
- Hits:
- 58,939
Bookmarked by stultifies
05 Sep 2023
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“I came home yesterday,” said Jason. As the aggrieved and the storyteller in one he was more due the preacher’s eye and so stepped forward. “And found her—saw her in our bedroom. On our bed, where we lie together—”
“Mister Carver,” said the preacher, “I’m gonna stop you there.”
Bookmarked by stultifies
18 Aug 2023
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Summary
Colin Bridgerton was very pleased with his achievements of the previous day. He had foiled a scam which could have brought ruin to Penelope's family and he had made it up to Will Mondrich. Now with the season winding down he is ready to head off on new adventures.
But why does his valet keep asking him to wear the same coat? And why can't his family remember the ball from the previous evening? Is he going mad or are they?
Perhaps Colin didn't get everything right after all. Will he figure out his mistakes? Or is he doomed to repeat the same day over and over again forever?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 69,745
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 639
- Kudos:
- 2,398
- Bookmarks:
- 580
- Hits:
- 53,148
Bookmarked by stultifies
05 Aug 2023
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In retrospect, maybe asking Nick to go with her to The Crafters’ Castle the day after he almost nailed her on the dining room table wasn’t Jess’s brightest idea ever.
Or: What happened in the 24 hours after the fishtank broke.
(Canon-divergent. Set after 2x19, “Quick-Hardening Caulk.”)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 34,501
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Comments:
- 304
- Kudos:
- 1,169
- Bookmarks:
- 208
- Hits:
- 36,605
Bookmarked by stultifies
29 Jun 2023