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    Stuck in an alt-world where he and Shane never hooked up as teenagers, Ilya is determined to get Shane back. To do that, Ilya has to figure out a way to get Shane to see him as anyone other than the Russian asshole who has spent a decade pissing him off. It can't be that hard to make your husband fall in love with you... right?

    Basically: Shane Hollander makes a wish with good intentions. Ilya Rozanov wakes up confused, single, closeted, and miserable in Boston.

    +Bonus Chapter where AltWorld!Ilya wakes up confused, married, out, and carefree in Ottawa

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    22 Feb 2026

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  2. Public Bookmark *

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    They’re in Boston on Ilya’s couch when it happens. They’ve lapsed into a comfortable silence, a muted game on in the background, Ilya’s head in Shane’s lap and Shane’s fingers in his hair. Ten minutes ago, they were tugging and twisting and curling; four minutes ago, they grew slow and tepid. When they go entirely still, Ilya turns in his lap to look up at him, ready to chirp him for falling asleep, but his breath catches in his throat at what he finds instead. Shane is not asleep, but he is not awake either.

    While visiting his boyfriend, Shane has a verbal shutdown in front of a woefully-unprepared Ilya for the first time.

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    22 Feb 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Shakespearean

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Listen, Hayden is aware of how hard it is to see past his baby face and his lack of stubble and his generally jovial demeanor. But he has four kids, okay? He’s not an idiot.

    or

    5 times Hayden suspected Shane was gay + 1 time Hayden knew for sure he was. With Ilya Rozanov, no less.

    Language:
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    22 Feb 2026

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    Cliff had to approach this correctly, or Ilya was liable to sock him in the jaw and clam up entirely. Subtlety was his friend here.

    And all of that flew immediately out of his head the moment that Ilya opened his front door, looking sweaty and shirtless and mildly pissed off, which was pretty much his standard look.

    “Are you moving to Canada for some fuckboy?” was how the question came out of his mouth instead.
    ---
    AKA the time that Cliff Marleau figured almost all of it out

    Series
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    21 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    There is a strong scent of antiseptic in the air, the kind that always haunts hospitals and morgues. Ilya thinks it is fitting. He thinks, perhaps, that some vital organ of his is failing irreparably, and he is only waiting for a doctor to call out his time of death.

    “You have lost your memories.” It’s not a question. Ilya’s burning hand drops from Shane’s cheek.

    “Yeah,” Shane says easily. “Wait, shit, did no one tell you?”

    “Is it temporary.” Ilya’s voice is hoarse, pleading. “This memory loss, is it… tell me that it is temporary.” Please, please, God. I know I promised to give anything up, but-

    Shane looks at Ilya with wide eyes. “They don’t know,” he says gently. He seems to be catching onto Ilya’s distress despite the drugs in his system.

    Ilya feels cold all over. Yes, any moment now, they will cover him with a white sheet and take him away.

    Shane's concussion in S01E05 leaves him missing his memories from the last decade. Ilya is now the only person in the world who knows the truth about him and Shane, and is forced to question whether to burden Shane with their complicated relationship or to walk away.

    Fic will be updated every 3-4 days.

    Language:
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    21 Feb 2026

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