ck762
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Coulson, for his part, stares up at Bucky with such a betrayed look of frozen horror that Natasha actually goes the extra step and presses another button, capturing the moment and airdropping the photograph to her phone for posterity. When he speaks, his voice comes out as a hoarse whisper. “Why…?” He swallows and starts again, trying for some semblance of normality. “...Why would you tweet something like that?!”
“If you must know, sir,” and somehow he manages to make ‘sir’ come out with the same inflection most people reserve for ‘motherfucking son of a bitch’, “it’s because I have a difficult time doing my job when my job involves monitoring the man with the best fucking ass in the United States of America.” He slowly lowers himself back into his seat until he’s at eye level, making extreme eye contact with Coulson until Coulson turns away to make mortified eye contact in Natasha’s general direction through the one-way glass. Natasha would take another picture, if she weren’t too busy catching Steve’s red-faced sputtering. “Sometimes, I vent to my Twitter followers. Sometimes, it’s about hot men with washboard abs. Can I go now, or do you need a graphic description of how I pleasure myself at night?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,127
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 1
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Bookmarked by ck762
17 Feb 2026
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Oh my god, this is so frickin hilarious! I cackled the whole way through
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Harry James Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Defeater of Voldemort, Chief Auror, Master of Death, finds that he is five years old.
The past, naturally, rapidly goes quite off the rails.
Series
- Part 1 of Messing With Time & related
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 71,903
- Chapters:
- 23/?
- Collections:
- 14
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- 1,261
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- 5,639
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Bookmarked by ck762
13 May 2024
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Recommended by the author that wrote ‘The Ghost of Privet Drive’
Other bookmakers have said it’s funny and even though it’s a WIP and unfinished, it’s still worth reading for the laughs
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Draco found the nest down in the Manor’s cellars, while he was clearing them out.
Series
- Part 7 of Harry Potter works
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,355
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 8
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- 1,194
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- 42,807
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Bookmarked by ck762
17 Feb 2026
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Because another bookmarker listed it as funny
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The War is Far From Over Now by Dont_call_me_Carrie
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
23 Aug 2020
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The world keeps pushing him, demanding, because what he did wasn't enough. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, but that wasn't enough, wasn't ever enough.
Tony Stark was tired. But he had a planet to protect, even if everyone laughed at him whenever the prospect of alien invasions was brought up. He could count on one hand how many people he could trust, which was disheartening but then, what else was new?
Or,
In which Tony does not, in fact, intend to take over the world.
...unfortunately, everyone else missed that particular memo.
[gradual divergence from canon, starting at the end of Iron Man 3. In which it's Tony's self-awareness, rather than his support system, that becomes a cryptid sometime during Phase II.]
Series
- Part 1 of Iron Man Lives Again [Or, Why Team Captain America Didn't Think This Through]
- Part 1 of Time To Carry The Colors Again
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 152,044
- Chapters:
- 45/45
- Collections:
- 24
- Comments:
- 7,786
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- 28,131
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- 11,045
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- 1,282,188
Bookmarked by ck762
17 Feb 2026
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Main story complete, there are timestamps with each of the different series’
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Summary
One conversation goes just the slightest bit differently. Just how much can that actually change?
The answer: a lot.
- Words:
- 151,562
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 1,800
Bookmarked by ck762
17 Feb 2026
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Books 1-3 completed
Books 4-6 unwritten as of 2/2026