catforqueen



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  1. Public Bookmark 47

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    "WouldyoustilllovemeifIwasaloon?" Shane blurted.  

    At that, Ilya clicked his phone shut, dropped it on his chest, and gazed straight into Shane's eyes. "What?" Ilya asked. 

    "You heard me. Would you still love me if I was a loon?" Shane could feel his cheeks turning hot. 

    "Why would you be loon?" Ilya's brows furrowed in obvious confusion. "How would you turn into loon?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    851
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    536
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    3,749

    19 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Wisdom teeth surgery: 0/10, would not recommend.

    Confessing your feelings to your secret boyfriend while high on anesthesia in front of a nurse: -10/10, please make it stop.

    Shane’s parents are in Belize, he’s got an emergency dental surgery, and Ilya drives two hours from Ottawa without hesitation. What follows is 24 hours of post-op care, an alarming amount of feelings said out loud, and the mortifying realization that yes, he really did call Ilya a “hot lion.”

    At least the nurse was cool about the whole secret boyfriend thing.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,234
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    7,177
    Bookmarks:
    1,004
    Hits:
    36,359

    19 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Lily: Well. There is very interesting studies I have read recently.

    Karolina: We’re listening!

    Lily: Research shows that abstinence can significantly improve athletic performance. Testosterone levels, energy conservation, mental focus. All better with sexual abstinence.

    Jackie: Wait, seriously?

    Lily: Oh yes, very serious research. Professional athletes should abstain completely during playoff runs. Some studies suggest 6-8 weeks for optimal results.

    Satu: SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS?!

    When “Lily” gets added to the Montreal Voyageurs WAGs group chat, she comes armed with peer-reviewed research, vibrators for everyone, and one revolutionary idea: a playoff sex ban for optimal athletic performance. The WAGs are convinced it’s evidence-backed science, the team is suffering, and Ilya is having the time of his life watching his handiwork unfold.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,739
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    483
    Kudos:
    11,687
    Bookmarks:
    1,912
    Hits:
    76,294

    19 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You wrote about us having sex while Hayden watches!”

    “Fictional us,” Ilya corrects. “Real us would never do that. Probably.” He pauses. “Unless …”

    “No!”

    Ilya Rozanov has always been competitive. But when his husband’s best friend starts calling a little too often, Ilya discovers a new arena for dominance: Archive of Our Own.

    Armed with a pseudonym that fools absolutely no one, explicit tags that would make a sailor blush, and a truly impressive commitment to pettiness, Ilya wages psychological warfare one kudos at a time. His weapon of choice? Extremely detailed fanfiction about why Hayden Pike will never, ever measure up.

    The problem? Hayden writes back.

    What follows is the most unhinged rivalry in hockey history: a battle fought not with fists or slapshots, but with comment sections, kudos, and increasingly creative ways to humiliate each other in front of thousands of readers. Featuring: footnoted statistics, educational sex advice, one very concerned wife, and Shane Hollander wondering what the hell he did to deserve this.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,367
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    363
    Kudos:
    5,827
    Bookmarks:
    998
    Hits:
    30,866

    19 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    To be clear, Ilya is grateful the rookies aren’t growing up the way he did in the NHL. Ilya took the hazing to the chin – humiliation rituals, beat downs, grueling practices to prove he could “hang” with the big guns on the team.

    That being said, there’s still some part of Ilya that balks at the request by the gaggle of rookies to watch The Iron Giant, a veritable children’s movie at the team’s latest movie night.

    OR: Five times Shane and Ilya were the support system for the Centaur rookies they dreamed of having when they were younger.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,028
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    782
    Kudos:
    17,756
    Bookmarks:
    4,640
    Hits:
    130,136

    19 Feb 2026