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Alastor has very few problems—or at least, very few problems unable to be solved by a well-placed knife. That is, until a murder is committed by someone other than him, endangering all his carefully laid schemes. Now the police are asking awkward questions and if they don't catch this abject amateur soon, Alastor could be in actual trouble.
But homicide isn't the only mystery surrounding Pride Manor. Following the unexplained disappearance of the Duchess of Pride seven years earlier, the estate has been abandoned. The eccentric duke has vanished, leaving behind only a recalcitrant gardener and a broken-hearted daughter. Despite his best efforts to the contrary, Alastor finds himself embroiled in two generations of Morningstar drama. It's enough to drive anyone to homicide—oh, wait.
Alastor is much better at committing crimes than solving them, and even his allies would be just as happy to see him behind bars as the actual culprit. Can he detective his way out of this—or has Alastor finally bit off more than he can chew?
Inspired by the vibe of notherpuppet's RadioApple Human AU, and the art of sketchyvero and notetaker, this is intended to be some nonsense with a classic murder mystery flavour.
- Language:
- English
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- 106,813
- Chapters:
- 26/26
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- 649
- Bookmarks:
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Bookmarked by Trensu
24 Feb 2026
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“Smiles drank my drink” Angel’s eyes were on Alastor’s struggling form as he spoke, wide, briefly turning just to look at the mostly empty glass now being inspected by Niffty, sniffed by Husk, the bartender rearing back in disgust as if his nostrils had been burned “bathrooms the only thing in that direction an he’s covered in blood clawin at himself like he can’t fuckin breathe—Charlie!” Angel grabbed her shoulders, forcing her attention to land on him “Alastor drank my drink!!”
Bookmarked by Trensu
23 Feb 2026
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Alastor never wanted touch, until he did.
Lucifer has always respected his boundaries. He never expected anything more.
But one quiet morning, an empty bed leads to a locked wardrobe, a long overdue conversation, and a confession.
Bookmarked by Trensu
22 Feb 2026
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It was an ambush.
Lucifer walked right into it.
Now, there's nothing to do but face the music.
Bookmarked by Trensu
22 Feb 2026
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Lucifer is addicted to his deer. That's it. And he gets what he wants.
Bookmarked by Trensu
21 Feb 2026

