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To be completely honest with himself, Dedede forgot his own castle had a mailroom to begin with.
There wasn’t really a point in the King coming all the way through long corridors and spacious wings of the palace when anything he ordered would be delivered right to his chambers. Although not without careful investigation to make sure his mail wasn’t tampered with, of course.
However, when the Meta Knight, of all people, is dragging His Majesty along with him to receive a package, Dedede has no choice but to oblige his partner’s sudden, spontaneous invite.
“Y’know, I actually didn’t know ya used the castle to pick up yer mail,” Dedede commented. “I always reckoned ya just got it all sent directly to your ship.”
The King spoke, facing his partner’s backside, as the soldier rustled through a small cubby against many others just like it.
“While it’s a good idea in theory, a constantly moving airship is a bit difficult for mail carriers to track down. Additionally, the Halberd lacks a regular address, so most shipping companies don’t consider it a legitimate place of residency.”
Meta’s hands were full of letters ranging from semi-important bills he’d yet to pay, all the way to junk mail. However, what stood out to Dedede was a rather nicely packaged cardboard box with multi-colored tape running across the edges and a few postage stickers here and there.
“Oooh…” Dedede cooed in awe. “Now what’s that ‘lil thing gotta be? I didn’t know you could actually buy things that weren’t purely work-related.”
“Oh, this?” Meta replied as he gave the box in his hands a tiny shake. “I bought a monthly subscription to a reading program I saw advertised online.”
Dedede’s once bright, excited smile at the thought of his partner actually ordering something interesting quickly morphed into an expression of disappointment when he realized what was really inside that package.
“Don’t tell me that box is full of old books…” The King trailed off through clenched teeth.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Mi Rey,” Meta scolded. “It’s merely a singular, newly-printed book. Buying a stack of worn ones would be ludicrous.”
“‘Course… What else would it be…” The King grimaced before continuing. “Why buy somethin’ like that anyways?”
Looking down at the armor-clad warrior in front of him, His Majesty was even more confused as to why Meta Knight would go out of his way for a single novel.
“I mean– I know how much ya love readin’ and all that, but we gotta whole freakin’ library right here in the castle! Just seems a bit like overkill considerin’ all the books we got…”
“They send me random novels from their catalog of recently released and newly published authors.” The warrior mentioned.
However, Meta Knight’s explanation quickly turned his expression to one of slight disdain as he continued to speak.
“And, to be frank with you, Dedede–” The knight began curtly. “I’ve already read all the books your library has to offer.”
Suddenly, a beat of silence interrupted the pair’s conversation as cold air wafted through the mailroom. The partners stared at each other, completely unmoving, until Dedede’s shocked face morphed into one of haughty laughter.
“Yeah, right–!” The King chuckled loudly to oppose the quiet. “You can sass me all ya want, Meta, but there ain’t no need to lie about how many books you’ve read.”
“I have no reason to lie about my literary prowess.”
Meta Knight’s response came far quicker than Dedede’s accusation.
“So you’ve read all those books?” Dedede gawked. “Even the boring ones? Even the ones with pages thicker than my own fist?!”
Just as the King began rambling on about the insanity and boredom of reading, his most loyal knight was eager to put an end to his stuttering.
“You’re underestimating how quickly I burn through books.” Meta said, his emotions never once changing.
Seeing the cold demeanor of the warrior, Dedede gulped.
“A– Alrighty then…”
Dedede’s once bold accusations trailed off into nothingness. The King was clearly frightened at his partner’s ability to both read all the books in the castle library and remember what they were about.
“Say, what’s that book in there ‘bout anyway?” Dedede asked curiously.
“Do you not know what the word ‘random’ entails, or are you merely trying to make conversation?” Said the soldier.
Although he’s wearing his signature mask, Dedede can tell Meta Knight is shooting him a dirty look.
“—Regardless, I wouldn’t even know what the plot entails until I’m a few chapters in.”
“Alright, Smartass,” The King quickly shot back as his arms crossed over his chest. “If that's how ya wanna be, then by all means– I don’t know why ya even dragged me all the way down here.”
For the first time throughout their entire conversation, something shifted in Meta Knight’s demeanor.
The warrior’s icy, aloof, uninterested attitude swiftly changed into something a bit more insecure and embarrassed for someone of his reputation.
“You implore me to accompany you on errands nearly every day. I didn’t think doing the same would bother you so much...”
Meta Knight could hardly hold eye contact with Dedede as he spoke from his heart.
And just as the warrior was swallowing the last bits of his humiliation, a rather undignified squeal shook him from his thoughts.
“Awww–!” Dedede swooned teasingly. “Don’t say ya just wanted to hang out with lil’ ol’ me now! That’s it, isn’t it?”
The soldier turned his head to the side to avoid the burning warmth he felt from Dedede’s all-knowing glare.
“...And if I did?” Meta murmured under his breath.
Although the King enjoyed relishing in his partner’s emotional constipation, he also took pleasure in reassuring the shorter man when the fun was over.
“Y’know all ya have to do is ask, Mety. Hell, you don’t even gotta ask half the time– I’ll just come along with ya whenever you want me.”
Hearing his partner’s words, Meta sighed in relief as an unseen smile overcame his lips.
“I’m glad to have you by my side in situations like these, Dedede.”
These short moments of public intimacy and affection between the two were often rare but greatly reciprocated by both parties. However, the deep love felt between the couple made up for any embarrassment they might feel in the moment.
“Yeah, yeah,” His Highness waved off the warrior’s compliments with a flush across his face. “I love you too, ya big idiot.”
While King Dedede’s a man of spontaneity, Meta Knight’s a creature of habit.
And for this very reason, the pair have decided to share meals with each other when given the chance. That way, the King wouldn’t fill up on snacks and junk food, and the knight would have a reserved moment in his schedule to take a minute and eat.
But today, something different greets the King’s view as he steps sleepily into the grand dining room.
“Good mornin’, Honey,” Dedede greeted his partner with his usual winning smile. “What’s that ya got there?”
The King stood there for a moment, met with nothing but cool silence and the turning of a page.
“Meta? Hello?”
When a response never came, slowly, so as not to alarm the other, Dedede put a hand on top of the book and gingerly moved it downward out of sight so he and Meta were eye level.
Finally, the warrior snapped back into reality as the source of his lacking awareness was ultimately pulled from view.
“Oh– Buenas, Mi Rey. Good morning to you as well.”
There was something a bit mindless and jumpy about the way Meta had greeted him, but Dedede simply brushed it off as another of the knight’s usual quirks.
“Sorry, I woke up late– That’s my bad. How long’ve ya been waitin’ here for me?”
“Only eight minutes,” Meta replied. “I was simply reading this book to pass the time.”
Dedede’s eyes darted back and forth over the scene before him. Meta Knight was sitting cross-legged, sipping a far too sweet coffee while gloved fingers trailed over each intricate detail of the new novel in his hands.
“Oooh, so ya finally cracked it open, huh?” Dedede questioned with growing intrigue. “So how are ya likin’ it so far?”
But not only was the warrior acting a tad strangely, he also refused to look Dedede in the eye as he spoke.
“It’s… rather enjoyable,” Meta mumbled nearly quiet enough to miss. “I was under the impression, based on the abstract, that this story would be played out and dull. However, the further I read, the more mistaken my original judgment becomes.”
“Well, ya sure look interested in that stack of stapled paper!” Dedede laughed. “What’s it about anyways?”
To what should’ve been a relatively easy question to answer was met with complete, utter silence from the warrior across the table.
“...”
The couple stared soundlessly at each other as a growing feeling of confusion crept up Dedede’s back.
“Er– Meta?”
Finally– After what seemed like an eternity of awkwardness– The warrior generously graced his partner with an answer.
“I doubt you’d find its contents to be very compelling. Even I found the first few chapters to be a bit tasteless for my liking, so I have trouble picturing how you’d find any meaning in this.”
Dedede couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at this.
Sure, he’d teased Meta for his taste in books and how those drawn-out novels would put him to sleep, but Dedede always made it clear he was more than happy to hear the soldier’s ramblings about his current book, regardless.
But for Meta Knight to completely brush him off…
“Aw, don’t be like that!”
Dedede moved closer to his partner to give him a teasing pat on the back, but Meta– Misconstruing his King’s actions– Swiftly avoided the physical touch and stuffed the book away deep into his cape.
“Believe me,” The hardened knight reaffirmed. “You hold no interest in what I’m reading. I am incredibly certain of that fact.”
“Oh, c’mon–! Just ‘cuz I wouldn’t read it personally doesn’t mean I don’t wanna hear you talk ‘bout it.”
The pair had done this routine nearly a thousand times by now, and Dedede had the bit down to a “T”.
First, he’d try to get Meta to open up a little about his thoughts by teasingly pestering him until he was worked up enough to become a tad emotional and worked up. Then, after much pushback and refusal, the warrior would relinquish his feelings into the world, only to realize it felt nice not bottling up all his emotions all the time.
It was a tried and true method that Dedede believed was one-hundred percent failproof!
However, the King’s once untouchable theory would soon be proved horribly incorrect.
“Well, perhaps I see no need in speaking with you about my novel.”
Ouch…
“Um– Okay..?!” Dedede shot back with a matching attitude.
Whatever minor feelings Dedede had of sorrow, confusion, and helplessness were completely overshadowed by the burning frustration that grew hotter and hotter in his chest.
“I’m just tryna have a conversation with you! There ain’t no need to turn this into an argument at seven in the mornin’!”
Something deep and unseen within the warrior suddenly caused him to freeze up before his partner. Then, it was as if that momentary pause drew something much colder out of Meta Knight.
“You’re right– ” He said swiftly as if the words were mindlessly pouring out of him.
Another pause spanned between the two after Meta’s reassurance as Dedede sighed deeply in relief, a slight smile forming across his lips. Maybe Meta Knight was finally beginning to understand that not everyone’s curiosity surrounding him and his interests was malicious.
“—So, I’m not entirely sure why you’re attempting to start one right now.”
Or maybe not.
Dedede squeezed his palms tight as his already heavy undereyes twitched.
And just as Dedede thought everything had been resolved between him and his partner, Meta went and found the final words to put the last nail in the coffin.
This man was going to be the death of him.
“H– Hey?!” Dedede cried in outrage. “The hell are ya bein’ so defensive for?!”
Meta crossed his arms over his chest while turning his attention away from the King across the table from him. Dedede had half a mind to slam his fist on the table, but he knew physical bouts of aggression would get the two nowhere.
“I’m not being defensive.”
“Those are the exact words ya use when yer bein’ defensive!”
The two found themselves at a verbal standstill, both waiting for the other to strike next with a snide comment or hurtful remark.
Dedede didn’t even have time to finish his next thought as the scraping sound of a chair being pushed out from beside him pierced his ears.
“I’m finished with my meal.”
Within moments, the warrior stood straight up from his seat with tense shoulders and a clear scowl hidden underneath his mask.
“Goodbye, Dedede.”
Meta Knight quickly turned tail towards the nearest available balcony. His dark cape transformed into large wings that flapped repeatedly as the soldier stormed off into the dawn sky.
Looking down at the table, Dedede noticed Meta had left behind an entire plate of untouched food and a near-empty cup of cream-white coffee.
The only sign the knight had ever been in the dining room in the first place was a stained mug steaming aimlessly, although the mess he left within Dedede’s heart was more than enough proof of his presence.
Although the couple had argued that morning, the time between then and now had given them each enough time to think through their feelings. However, that didn’t mean they had completely made up.
Now teetering on the edge of midnight, the pair lay quietly in Dedede’s large bed as they did most nights. And just like the majority of these late nights spent together, Dedede watched reality television lazily as Meta Knight read a book beside him.
However, unlike most nights, the air between them was obviously tense regardless of whether they wanted to admit it or not.
As much as Dedede didn’t wanna start another argument between the two, he was practically itching to know just what was so important in those dog-eared pages that his own partner couldn’t tell him.
But Dedede wasn’t an idiot– At least, that’s what he thought.
The King knew he couldn’t just ask Meta outright about what he was reading unless he wanted a reaction like this morning.
So, he’d just have to play it safe until he could.
“Sooo… How was work today?”
Dedede could only feel his throat tighten at how awkward his voice sounded aloud, but he continued to press forward in search of answers.
Meta Knight’s near rhythmic scanning of words and turnings of pages faltered at the sound of his partner’s question, but quickly picked up the pace again once Meta noticed he was being stared at.
“Fine,” He answered without batting an eye. “There was an orientation for new castle soldiers that I spoke for, but besides that, I did a few rounds around the palace perimeters and rewired the server unit on the Halberd.”
“Sounds eventful, I reckon.”
“Not quite, but if that’s how you’d describe it, Mi Rey, then by all means.”
The King’s patience finally hit its peak at his partner’s passive-aggressive remarks.
“Okay– Seriously! What’s up with you today?!”
Dedede flinched at the sound of his own voice. He hadn’t meant to accuse Meta with that much anger, but he’d had an entire day to let his emotions fester and ruminate into something far more bitter than he’d intended.
“What exactly do you mean?” Questioned the warrior. The uninterested, sharp tone of his words was nearly enough to cause Dedede to blow a fuse.
“You’ve had yer nose in that book all day! Hell, even now when I’m tryna talk to you ‘bout the kinda day you had, you’ve just been brushin’ me off like some kinda pest!”
“Dedede,” Meta began slowly. “I read every night. I don’t understand why tonight is any different from the other times I’ve read a book before going to sleep.”
“‘Cuz I know yer hidin’ something from me this time– I just know it!” Dedede accused with a steadily growing temper. “I can tell from that sneaky look plastered all over yer lying face!”
The King shoved a finger into his knight’s chest, but was met with a lackluster reaction comparable to the rest of his comments from the latter.
“I still have my mask on so– No– You can’t tell anything from my expression.”
Dedede was nearly ripping his own hair out with how insistent Meta Knight was when it came to arguing with him.
“Ugh–! Just tell me what’s so secret in that damn book that’cha won’t yer own partner see!”
While the expression on his face was hidden by a sheet of cold steel, it didn’t take a genius to hear the spite sewn into the warrior’s tone.
“Frankly, it’s none of your business nor concern.”
The pair’s disagreement had evolved from light bickering to a full-on scream fight.
“Will ya just quit shuttin’ me out for once?!” Dedede roared. “I ain’t interrogatin’ you or nothin’, I just wanna know why yer keepin’ secrets from me?!”
Meta Knight shot back without missing a beat.
“It’s not a secret.”
“But then why wont’cha tell me already?!”
Whether it was the growing pressure of the tension, the overwhelming feeling of being interrogated, or a mixture of those unsavory thoughts, it didn’t matter. What mattered to Meta Knight at this point was the burning rage inside him that he’d let accidentally slip from his grasp and into the open.
“Did you ever think I’d simply rather you not know?!”
Suddenly, the once screaming partners were now utterly silent at what they had both heard and confessed.
There was a bizarre peace to it all, as if they had each entered the eye of the storm and there was no turning back.
A deep sigh from Dedede dragged the warrior back to reality.
“...You know there ain’t nothin’ you could do that would ever make me hate you, right?” Dedede asked above a whisper. “No one’s out to get’cha here– Certainly not me, at least... You know that, right?”
Dedede’s eyebrows furrowed as he tried to look his partner in the eyes, but Meta had already turned his head away from the King.
“Can we pick this up at another time?” He pleaded with an exhausted tone. “I’m tired, my head aches, and I don’t think I can explain myself to you at this very moment…”
An uncharacteristically soft mumble came from the warrior across the mattress.
“Please, Dedede.” Meta Knight urged.
As furious as he was and as irritated as he felt, Dedede knew there was something far beyond himself keeping him from saying “No” to Meta.
“Fine, I’ll drop it.” He caved, sighing hopelessly. “But that don’t mean this conversation is over, ya hear? Let’s… Let's just go to bed, ‘kay?”
Dedede looked longingly into the back of his partner, who had already rolled over to face the wall. The King paused, waiting for the warrior to say something, anything that could make him feel like he wasn’t drowning in his own emotions.
Instead, all Dedede heard was the sound of leather straps being adjusted as the sound of metal hitting the wooden surface of a nightstand echoed throughout the bedroom.
And just when Dedede felt things couldn’t get worse, the warrior finally said what he’d been dreading all along.
“Agreed,” Meta whispered coldly.
Then, the flicker of a bedside lamp enveloped the pair in a deep, dark nothingness.
“So are you guys fighting again or what?”
The King found himself in the castle’s spacious courtyard, trying to ease the anxious nagging in the back of his mind from last night’s failure of an interrogation.
While normally a walk through his palace would be enough to clear his mind, Dedede knew he’d hit rock bottom when he realized he was confiding in two young children to validate his feelings.
“It’s not a ‘fight–’,” Dedede clarified with a frustrated tone. “It’s an adult conversation that involves strong words and differin’ points’a view sometimes.”
But it seems Kirby was deadset on his interpretation of the events being the “right” one.
“Sooo… a fight?” The pink child reasoned, clearly having made up his mind.
“Ugh–!” Dedede scowled.
It didn’t matter what the King said anymore. There was no point in arguing with the personification of a brick wall.
“Y’all ain’t got no school today or somethin’ important like that?” Dedede said, incredibly eager to switch topics.
Another childish voice caught the attention of His Majesty as he looked down to see a blue bandana and a timid expression tugging at the edge of his robe.
“Um… Great King?” Bandana Dee stammered as he fidgeted with the hem of his King’s iconic, velvety garment. “Today’s actually a Saturday…”
For the first time today, the whispers of the spring breeze could be heard by all parties as both children and one unaware royalty were processing what had just been said. Before the situation grew too awkward for comfort, the King finally decided now was the time to say something.
…Even if what he said was only a simple gasp of realization.
“Oh...” Dedede’s voice trailed off.
The recent argument had Dedede’s mind all over the place. So much so that once-important things like the day of the week were at the bottom of his priority list.
“Is it really?” He questioned sincerely.
But before Bandee had a moment to properly correct his King’s prior statement, Kirby was quick to interject with his own opinion on the matter.
“See, that’s how you know that they’re fighting ‘cuz Meta’s the one who tells him about the date and stuff like that.”
While Dedede prided himself on growing from a lazy tyrant to a well-respected ruler, that little, pink pest always found a way to push the King’s buttons just enough to get a flash of his more temperamental side.
“C’mere, ya loudmouthed brat–!”
Without a second thought, the King swooped his arms in the child’s direction, but the power of youthful energy was far too fast for him as Kirby narrowly dodged the strong appendages.
“Don’t yell at me just ‘cuz Meta’s mad at you!” He shot back, clearly offended.
Before Dedede had a chance to rebut these claims, the conversation had already gotten away from him.
“Why are you two arguing anyway?” Bandee concerningly questioned. “Did something really serious happen?”
The King quickly lost his fury as he rubbed his neck anxiously and looked off to the side.
“Well, I wouldn't say serious…” He mumbled.
“Are any of their fights ever super serious?” Kirby added, clearly in his own world.
Dedede’s mild nervousness quickly turned into agitation.
“Pipe down already!” He yelled. “What I’m tryin’ to say is that do either of y’all know if Meta’s part of some secret book club or something?”
“‘Secret book club’?” Both children parroted.
“Mhmm,” Dedede nodded in agreement. “He’s been obsessed over this new book he bought online the other day and hasn’t put it down since he cracked it open.”
“I mean– That doesn’t sound super unusual for him or anything,” Bandee reassured.
“Yeah, Meta loves reading!” Added Kirby. “Like, almost as much as he loves chocolate– And that’s a lot.”
While he appreciated the children’s concern, Dedede couldn’t help but rub his temples irritably at the situation.
“Look, I know that all sounds normal for him– And it is– But the thing is, he absolutely refuses to tell me what his book is about.”
The children quickly shared a puzzled look, whipping their heads in synch towards each other before turning their attention back to the frazzled king before them.
Bandana Dee was the first to speak up, clearly anxious and fiddling with the hem of his shirt.
“Um… Not to make fun of your worries,” Bandee began thoughtfully. “But Sir Meta Knight isn’t really– Well, I wouldn’t really consider him– ”
“‘Talkative’?” Dedede quickly filled in the words for the stuttering child.
“Y– Yeah…” Bandee mumbled. “Something like that…”
“Don’t sweat it, Kid,” Dedede reassured. “Yer right, he ain’t the chattiest, but when he finds something he really, really likes, he can’t help but blab all about it to me.”
“Well, he did mention he wanted to get his hands on some new books.”
Dedede quickly turned all his attention to the bandana-wearing child. Finally, his investigation had scrounged up a lead on Meta Knight’s odd behavior.
“Do ya know what kinda books he got?”
“Er– I’m not really sure… When I asked what he was reading, all he said was that they’re ‘for adults’.”
The King’s eyes went wide as Bandee recalled his account with the mysterious soldier. Dedede could hardly believe what he was hearing.
“F– For adults?!” He repeated in a stammer.
Bandana Dee nodded his head in agreement with a matching “Mhmm,”.
“I always knew Meta was bold with his choices, but I never pegged him as the kinda guy to read that kinda stuff…”
Dedede’s prior comment was more targeted towards himself from the sheer disbelief of what he’d been hearing, but saying the words aloud clearly caught the interest of two curious children.
“What stuff? What are you talking about?” Questioned Bandee.
“Yeah, I also don’t think I follow,” Kirby added, equally confused.
“No- Nothing!” Dedede cried. “D– Don’t you kids worry ‘bout stuff like that… But– Uh– Did he tell y’all anything else?”
“Um, not really," Bandana Dee added. "But, he did look kinda… embarrassed when I asked him about it. I was gonna ask him something else too, but he used his cape and vanished.”
Dedede bit his tongue and practically scowled at the thought of his partner being so degenerate.
“Oh, now I really gotta ask him about that book…” Dedede muttered to no one in particular but himself.
Just as Dedede was about to take his leave to return to the inner palace, he took a deep breath as he placed both his palms on each child’s head and ruffled their hair affectionately.
“I appreciate y’all’s help today, but this is between me ‘n Meta. You shouldn't be worryin’ about adult issues, you should both be enjoyin’ yer day off.”
His Majesty was met with a pair of bright smiles that shone like the sun.
“Okay, well, you know where to find us, Great King.”
“I sure do,” Dedede mentioned. “Y’all have fun now, I’m headin’ back to the castle.”
Once the King was halfway across the courtyard, a slew of farewells echoed throughout the vicinity.
“Goodbye! We hope it all goes well!” Bandee waved with sincerity.
Kirby, however, was much more rampant and energetic in his goodbye waves.
“Byeee–!” He yelled at the top of his little lungs. “I hope you and Meta make up with lots of kisses!”
“Knock it off!” Dedede yelled back.
Once again, the couple was cuddled up in Dedede’s bed as the two relaxed late into the night.
…Maybe “cuddled up” wasn’t the best terminology for the pair’s situation, considering both men were teetering on the edge of their respective sides of the bed as they each did their own thing.
To be honest, Dedede was surprised Meta hadn’t retreated back to his room on the Halberd after their last dispute. But Meta’s reluctance to return to his ship gave the King the perfect opportunity to confront his lover on a silver platter, and he was not putting this chance to waste.
Grabbing the remote from his nightstand and turning the volume on the television down to a mere whisper, His Majesty mentally steeled himself for what was about to come next.
“Hey, Meta…” Dedede began hesitantly. “Do you mind puttin’ the book down for a minute? I wanna talk to you ‘bout somethin’.”
Begrudgingly, the warrior put his novel aside and turned to face Dedede, who looked more as if he was sweating bullets before pestering Meta with questions.
“Yes?” The knight replied coldly.
“Well– Uh–” Dedede gulped. “It’s actually about that book you’ve been readin’ and all I wanna say is– ”
“Dedede,” Meta Knight swiftly interrupted his partner’s incessant stammering. “I already told you I have no interest in sharing the contents of this novel. How many times do I have to say it?”
“Okay, well, this is actually sorta important, so if you could just listen to me for a minute here.” The King tried to explain. “It’s about your– Well– Your readin’ habits…”
“I’m not certain what you’re getting at.”
Dedede scratched at his beard anxiously. He knew he’d have to brace himself for how awkward of a conversation he was about to have with Meta Knight.
“I’m not tryna yuck yer yum or shame ya for likin’ that kind of stuff–”
At first, Dedede had devised a plan to keep his opinion out of the pair’s conversation.
“Dedede…”
But the longer he spoke, the more he could feel himself rambling on with steadying vehemence.
“But ya know you can’t be readin’ those things just out and about like that! Especially not in front of the kids–!”
“Dedede…”
“‘M just sayin’ that if ya wanted some kinda release, then you should’a just told me that before so I could hel–”
“Dedede!”
Meta Knight’s sudden roar of the King’s name snapped Dedede back on track to the actual topic at hand.
“¡Ya Basta! ¡Deja eso!” Meta cried. “I haven’t the slightest clue what you’re referring to, but that doesn’t matter.”
Meta wasn’t the only one fed up here. Dedede felt like he was grasping at straws here just to get the tiniest bit of information out of the soldier.
“Can’t ya just tell me up front so we don’t have to do–” Dedede gestured expressively to the visible space between him and Meta. “–THIS anymore!”
The warrior crossed his arms and sighed.
“There’s nothing to be told,” Meta Knight claimed. “Still, I don't know why you’re so adamant about this. Why are you so insistent about getting an answer to a question I already dealt with? I just don’t understa–”
As if the weight of his suspicions grew too harrowing, Dedede finally yelled out to the world what he had been meaning to confront the warrior with this whole time.
“WELL, IF YER READIN’ PORN IN PUBLIC THEN– YEAH– I’D LIKE A FEW QUESTIONS ANSWERED!”
Silently, the couple stared at each other.
“...”
Meta Knight had the complexion of a ghost as he hesitantly responded to Dedede’s accusations.
“...What?”
The clear shock on Meta’s face threw Dedede for a loop. The King could hardly stop stuttering as he pushed on with his interrogation.
“Um… Y’know… Isn’t that book ya got there like– Kinda… smutty?” Dedede inquired.
Meta was at a complete loss for words.
Never in a million years did he think this would be the thing Dedede had been accusing him of this whole time.
Without making a sound, the warrior moved his hand that had been covering the title of the book and finally relented on his stance of not letting the King see the private novel.
With the fabled book he’d been longing to read for the past forty-eight hours now in his grasp, Dedede’s eyes trailed over the face of the book as he carefully read the headlining text.
“Understanding You–” And in smaller letters beneath the title read– “A Guide to the Emotional Art of Vulnerability, Physical Intimacy, and Divergent Thinking”.
His Majesty stared at the cover of the novel silently as his eyes darted across the book’s cover and spine.
“It’s a… A self-help book?”
The moment the words left the King’s lips, Meta’s face and ears turned a deep red.
“Meta?” Dedede asked.
The warrior could hardly look his King in the eye as shame clouded his vision and judgment.
“I… Forgive me for withholding this information from you, Mi Rey. I realized I haven’t been as forthcoming with you as I should have. But–”
The warrior’s breath hitched as he spoke with growing fervor.
“–But I’ve never… I’ve never related to a book so strongly before…”
Dedede looked blankly at his partner.
He knew he had to say something, but every time the King went to comfort his knight, the words got stuck in his throat.
“Did I do somethin’ to make ya think you couldn’t tell me?” Dedede finally managed through a plethora of separate questions he had planned.
Meta weakly shook his head back and forth.
“No, not at all,” He replied. “It has nothing to do with you. The fault is mine here.”
Looking at the fear-striken warrior, Dedede chose his next work very carefully.
“Were you… embarrassed?” He treaded lightly.
Meta Knight looked down at the mattress as a nagging humiliation clawed at him.
“It’s shameful,” Mumbled the warrior. “All of your love and affection… It makes me feel rather out of place.”
Dedede’s brows furrowed at his partner’s words.
Was this his fault?
Had he been pushing the warrior too much in their relationship?
“Do you not want this?” Dedede asked as his voice shook in poorly-veiled despair.
“Us bein’ together, I mean,” He started. “And sleepin’ together, and spendin’ all our time together– Is that too much?”
“No, of course I want us to stay together. Having you as a partner is a joy beyond words for me. But…”
“‘But’?” Dedede parroted.
The warrior took a deep sigh before continuing.
“–But I suppose discussing these sorts of things with others doesn’t come to me as naturally as it does for someone like you.”
Dedede paused at Meta’s confession.
He knew the warrior admired him in certain aspects, but he didn’t know Meta Knight thought so highly of him.
“I’m flattered you think that of me,” His Majesty conceded. “But I still don’t know why this book’s got you in such a tizzy?”
A bead of sweat rolled down Meta’s forehead before he could respond.
The warrior had fought life-or-death battles that had garnered less of a reaction out of him, so why was his heart beating faster than ever before at the prospect of something so simple?
“I’m not… Like the rest of you.”
Meta Knight could hardly believe the words coming out of his own mouth. It was a feeling he’d held deep down within himself for decades now, and to finally speak the words aloud was as liberating as they were a terrible reminder of the shame he’d felt festering inside him for too long.
“What do ya mean, Mety?” Dedede asked.
Clearly, the conversation had gotten away from them as the King was now immensely puzzled.
“Don’t say that, ‘course you are.”
“No, I’m not.” He reiterated.
Meta Knight’s talon-like hands gripped the bedsheets tight enough to leave long rips in the fabric.
“The way you all interact with others. The children make friends easily, but anyone could chalk that up to their youth. However, you especially go out of your way to seek people out and make them feel comfortable–”
“–Every banquet, every meeting– It’s as if there’s a whole world out there tailored to people like you.”
Each word the warrior spoke felt like vicious hands on his throat, choking the life out of him.
“And I foolishly thought that a novel like this would finally give me the insight into that world– That the more I read, the more like you I could become.”
Dedede said nothing.
An awkward, pitiful silence enveloped the pair. Meta Knight felt it was best to fill that silence with a final apology.
“You don’t have to scold me for my behavior. I understand it was ridiculous and I shouldn’t hav–”
But the apology never came.
“Don’t say that,” A deep voice ordered as heartfelt as it was serious.
In a flash, the King had moved his hand right atop the warrior’s lips. It was a rather irrational, uncouth action for someone of His Majesty’s status, but Dedede didn’t know how else to get Meta to stop sullying his own name.
“Don’t you ever say somethin’ like that.”
The two sat for a moment as Dedede’s hands encapsulated the bottom half of his partner’s face. However, the King quickly removed the appendages when he realized what he had been doing.
“S– Sorry ‘bout that, Meta,” The King added for the inconvenience. “But I’m not gonna let ya keep talkin’ bad about yerself like this!”
Dedede grabbed his partner’s hand and squeezed endearingly.
“I had no idea you felt that way. I kinda feel like an asshole for pressurin’ you to show me this whole time, and I shouldn’t have done that.” Dedede apologized.
Meta Knight put his free hand up between them as if to physically stop Dedede’s unnecessary atonement.
“Don’t be,” Admitted the soldier. “I should’ve told you from the start. My own weakness brought this upon us and our relationship.”
“Bein’ scared doesn’t equal bein’ weak, y’know?”
“You’ve told me before.”
“Yeah, I get that. But sometimes ya need the reminder.”
The main hurdle of their discussion had passed, but there was still much left to be said.
“Now that we’re both here…” Dedede began. “Do you wanna talk ‘bout this whole thing?”
Meta Knight paused with uncertainty.
“...Not really,” He claimed. “But it’s the least you deserve out of me after this weekend of arguments.”
“Heh, good answer.”
The warrior could feel his throat closing up again and the need to retreat to safety nagging at his conscience.
However, another loving squeeze to his hand gave Meta Knight the reassurance to continue.
“I wasn’t interested in this book when I first received it,” The soldier began rather casually for his own begrudging admission. “It seemed played out and self-pitiful. But the more I read, the more I realized the author’s own self-anecdotes of their experiences seemed to coincide with mine in a strange way.”
Making sure the warrior was completely done with his retelling before talking again, Dedede questioned his partner accordingly
“Does that bother you?” The King asked.
“It did at first,” Said Meta. “But it felt rather… ‘freeing’ to have a complete stranger understand these sorts of troubles.”
“Is that why ya hid this from me for so long?” Dedede added. “‘Cuz you thought I wouldn’t understand?”
“It’s not because I didn’t think you were incapable of understanding. Rather, something deep within me kept clawing at my own rationality– Telling me you would ridicule me for something that came to you like second nature.”
The warrior’s hand made a fist that shook in anger before loosening his fingers to reveal an empty palm.
“Even when we met in the mailroom a few days ago, I couldn’t bring myself to tell you why I had requested you come with me until you pushed me to do so.”
Dedede’s shoulders sank at Meta’s vulnerable confession.
He had no idea his partner’s insecurities ran this deep.
“I’m sorry for snooping where I shouldn’t have. You shouldn’t feel compelled to say things you don’t want to or be somethin’ ya aren’t.”
Seeing the warrior who was always so guarded and unreceptive towards others act so raw was such an agonizing sight.
“Ya don’t like small talk or parties. You like readin’ and you only really blab about the things you really, really like–”
“–And there’s nothin’ wrong with that.”
For the first time throughout his emotional admission, Meta Knight turned his head to meet Dedede’s deep blue eyes full of nothing but affection and worry.
“I’m sorry people have made ya feel like that before, but I don’t think there anythin’ wrong with you.”
Now holding both the warrior’s hands in his own, Dedede could tell Meta Knight was shaking.
“I wouldn’t change ya for the world, Mety.”
Whether it was out of fear, or hurt, or deep, deep anguish, Dedede let his partner shake and falter for as long as he needed to.
“I mean… Unless you want to spend an entire evenin’ talking to people with a big smile and acting interested in what they have to say. We can start social trainin’ at the drop of a hat if that’s what’cha want.”
Dedede’s attempts at lightening the mood were met with silence.
However, the tiniest sliver of a laugh caught the King’s attention.
“...That sounds like a nightmare.” Meta Knight snickered to himself.
He still seemed rather upset, but there was now a small smile on his face compared to the heartbreaking frown that he had plastered across his lips just moments earlier.
“I don’t even like that kinda thing, and I love big parties,” Dedede said, adding on to the bit he’d created.
Nothing else was said as the couple met each other in a much-needed embrace.
An entire weekend of tension and miscommunication wore the partners out. Dedede held the soldier even tighter before sweeping Meta under an array of blankets to cuddle him further.
Meta Knight sighed in relief. It was nice to be honest about the inner workings of his mind with someone as loving as Dedede.
The couple adjusted to the endearing quiet that grew between them.
Well… That was until Dedede opened his mouth.
“To be completely honest with ya– I think it’s attractive how yer a man of few words. The mysteriousness of it all is pretty sexy, y’know?”
Meta Knight sighed again, but this time it was rooted in annoyance.
“You’re terrible.” He grumbled between the warm fabric of Dedede’s pajamas he had pressed his face into.
“Guilty as charged.”
Now looking up at the King, Meta gingerly began playing Dedede’s braided beard as he spoke.
“...I still can’t believe you thought I was reading such vulgar things.”
“H– Hey!” Dedede cried, rather offended. “It was an educated guess. The kids told me you were readin’ something weird so…”
“So you thought it was an erotic romance novel?” Meta filled the words in for his partner.
“Leave me alone!”
The warrior simply laughed at his King’s habit of jumping to conclusions.
“Well, I read most genres, so I see how you could’ve interpreted that.”
Dedede snickered to himself as he conjured the perfect question to ask the knight.
“Even the raunchy, lewd ones?” Asked Dedede with a mischievous smile.
But although he believed this comment would fluster Meta, the warrior responded swiftly without skipping a beat.
“Occasionally,” Confirmed Meta Knight. “But I read those in private on my ship when I’m alone.”
Seeing as his plan had completely backfired, Dedede’s jaw dropped wide with a pair of shocked eyes to match.
“Don’t look at me like that,” The warrior scolded. “And close your mouth. I’m only telling you this to avoid another situation.”
Seeing Dedede’s failed attempts at pushing his button made Meta want to try something similar with the King.
“You mentioned helping me with some kind of ‘release’ earlier, if I do recall. What was that about?”
Dedede avoided eye contact with Meta as he anxiously scratched at his cheek.
“Hehe… Well, I guess there are just some things a book can’t teach ya.”
“Are there now?” The soldier knowingly pondered.
Meta Knight’s teasing was clearly getting to the man, but Dedede was determined to prove he wasn’t the type of guy to tap out at a little bit of flirting here and there.
“I mean, I could always show you if yer curious.”
Although he sounded annoyed, Dedede could tell his attempts were working when he noticed the ever-growing smile across Meta Knight’s face.
“Dim the lights a bit–” Ordered the warrior. “Then we’ll talk.”
Dedede snatched his partner into another quick squeeze before he rushed to do what was asked of him.
“Ugh, I can’t believe ya thought I didn't like you. No one else could do this sorta stuff to me, y'know.”
Now, the couple were face to face as their bodies shared the same adoring warmth between them.
“I love ya, Mety.”
Before the two could take it any further, Meta Knight stole a kiss from the King’s lips.
“I love you too, Dedede.”