Work Text:
Okay, so, a couple things.
For one, he cannot believe the money in his hands right now. Cheng Xiaoshi marvels at it like it’s a winning lottery ticket. It feels like it’s glistening golden in the morning light. It’s beautiful. There’s a thousand yuan before his eyes. A whole thousand. He’s done it. He’s actually saved money. It’s the holidays and he’s closing the shop for a couple days and he’s holding his savings. He could fly away into the sky like an angel gaining his wings. Today is the best day ever.
And so, while he does indeed have a considerably large sum of money right at his fingertips, Cheng Xiaoshi is confronted with the reason he saved in the first place, and it is to beat Qiao Ling and Lu Guang at gift giving.
Anyone who says gift giving isn’t a competition is lying because they don’t live with a chronic over-thinker and have a highly competitive sister. Those two make it a competition. Cheng Xiaoshi is brutally reminded every year that not only is he, apparently, extremely inconsiderate, but also broke. He has no idea how Lu Guang stashes any of their shared revenue away to buy him stuff, let alone how he remembers things Cheng Xiaoshi spoke about offhandedly months ago. It’s like wizardry. The dark and evil sort.
Meanwhile, Qiao Ling makes it her absolute personal mission to not only gloat about how incredible and occasionally lavish her gifts are, but also how much better she is at it. And the worst part is that Cheng Xiaoshi just has to grit his teeth because it’s true. She has some innate sense of knowing exactly what he wants before he’s even aware of it. She calls it the sister effect, but Cheng Xiaoshi isn’t fully convinced she’s not listening in the walls sometimes. She probably is.
This leads to the biggest problem. Cheng Xiaoshi bought Qiao Ling’s gift around a month ago with some other money he’s been saving. He spotted it while being dragged around by Xu Shanshan in her efforts to shop for Dong Yi and bought it on the spot, even if it hurt his food budget for the next week. It's an over the shoulder pink bunny bag with a fluffy face and adjustable ears and he knows she’s gonna be obsessed with it, especially when Xu Shanshan told him they had sold out only days later. Lu Guang even complimented it when he accidentally uncovered its very inconspicuous hiding spot in the closet next to the red room. He said it was cute. Cheng Xiaoshi was elated.
So that’s all sorted, which is fantastic! Always great to plan ahead, a thing that Cheng Xiaoshi absolutely never does. But he has and now there’s only one gift he really has to worry over. However, the real issue at hand happens to be that he has no idea what to get Lu Guang and it makes him wanna bash his head into the shop’s counter.
This shouldn’t even be a problem. He has no idea how it is a problem. Every single year he knows something Lu Guang would like, the issue is that he cannot physically get it. He knows Lu Guang. Better than anyone else, he’d bet. It’s crazy to think he wouldn’t know what to get Lu Guang for the holidays. That’s his roommate. They sleep in bunk beds. They run a business together. They have weirdly interconnected time powers that Cheng Xiaoshi has decided to never delve into fully. So he should know what Lu Guang wants, like he always has, except he really, really doesn’t. And it bothers him.
Perhaps it wouldn’t bother him as much if he didn’t have a very clear answer to help his conundrum, but the thought of asking Qiao Ling to help him feels like he’s walking into a trap. It’s the very obvious solution to maybe not as catastrophic of a problem as Cheng Xiaoshi makes it out to be. So maybe everything is fine, actually.
The shop bell rings. “A guest has arrived.”
Qiao Ling struts into the shop like she owns the place, which, okay, she literally does, and she eyes Cheng Xiaoshi like he’s a dog she just caught chewing up the sofa. “Why are you like that,” she asks with zero decorum.
Cheng Xiaoshi wrinkles his nose. “Like what.”
“Moping.” She walks over to him and peers down at his form that is currently slumped over the counter in despair. “How much do you have?” she asks, eyeing the cash in his hand.
He bolts up and holds the money to his chest, far away from her greedy little hands. “None of it is for rent payments. I made them last week.”
She frowns. “Oh. Why do you have so much, then?”
“What, can I not just have my hard earned money in my hands?”
“Don’t pretend you earned that in a day.”
“I could’ve!”
Qiao Ling presses her fingers to her temple. “You give me a migraine,” she mutters before leveling a look at Cheng Xiaoshi, one that tells him to fess up or she’ll get the information out of him somehow. It sends a scary chill down his spine. “What is the money for?” she reiterates.
Well, there goes literally any hope at not involving her into this. Oh well. Maybe his classic spontaneity is just what this absolute mess of a situation is.
Cheng Xiaoshi sighs before rifling through the money again as he speaks. “Lu Guang’s present. I got about a thousand yuan in my hand and absolutely no clue what to do with it.”
She blinks for a second before gaping as she understands. “Wait—you don’t know what to get him?!”
He slaps a hand over her face, mostly missing her mouth. “Would you shut up?!” Cheng Xiaoshi hisses at her. “He’s napping upstairs.”
Qiao Ling is already at the brink of laughter. “Oh, wow, Xiaoshi. Wow.” She kneels over a little as she giggles. “A thousand yuan?”
He smacks her on the head. “Yes, a thousand. I’ve been saving all year for it.” He’s beginning to ramble now. “And I’ve been telling myself the perfect gift idea will come to me like it does every year. But no, not this year! Instead, I’m drawing an absolute blank and he’s gonna show up and make me cry while I give him jack shit.”
Qiao Ling’s laughter dies down, but certainly not her utter amusement at this situation. Even so, she already understands how much this is getting to him. It’s clear in the taut line of his shoulders as he thinks about giving Lu Guang something mediocre. It’s kind of sweet, if only Cheng Xiaoshi weren’t a bumbling idiot.
“Okay then,” she says finitely. “As your residential gift giving expert, I will help you in this endeavor.”
He glares at her. “For your information, I didn’t ask for your help.”
“And yet you’re getting it!”
“Lucky me.”
Qiao Ling smacks him on the back of his neck. “Listen. Your stupid little brain isn’t gonna shut up about this until we fix it, and that means you’re gonna nag me about it until we fix it.” She grabs his sleeve. “Which means we’re gonna go now and be back before Lu Guang wakes up.”
Cheng Xiaoshi pulls his arm away. “What?! No! We can’t go now! I don’t know what to get him! Where would we even be going?”
“The mall closes tomorrow,” she points out. “If we wanna find anything, we should try there. It’s far too late for anything handmade, but we can still give it that vibe. Thankfully, you don’t have too narrow of a budget, but we’re still gonna have to pull some strings to make it work.” She narrows her eyes at her brother. “You’re gonna have to trust me on this one, Xiaoshi.”
“Ooh, yikes. Do I have to?”
“If you wanna wake up with hair on your head tomorrow.”
“What the hell? Are you gonna shave my head in the dead of night?”
“I could.”
He blinks at her. “You’re a psychopath.”
She waves him off. “Yes, yes, whatever, let’s go! We don’t have all day,” she scolds and she shoves Cheng Xiaoshi towards the jacket rack. He picks one out as she adjusts her scarf and hat and taps her shoe in impatience. When he looks at the shop entrance, he spots her giving him a look that says ‘I’ll kill you if you’re not out of this door in the next ten seconds.’
Cheng Xiaoshi thinks this is the worst mistake he’s ever made.
——
The wall to the mall is brisk and cold and Cheng Xiaoshi thinks he’s going to die.
“Alright,” Qiao Ling claps her hands together once they’ve arrived. “This is life or death, Xiaoshi. People will be tearing each other to pieces to get last minute gifts. We need to act fast and with intent.”
Cheng Xiaoshi nods. “Right. Okay. Main problem, we have no intent.”
“Precisely.” She turns and looks around at the bustling shopping mall around them, people dipping in and out of stores desperately searching for something to appease their loved ones. It’s a frantic environment, one that Cheng Xiaoshi is once again at a loss as to how he’s involved in it. What is he missing? Why can’t he think of a gift for Lu Guang?
Qiao Ling pushes at his shoulder. “Hey, out of your head. I can hear the echo from here.”
He gawks at her. “The echo? My head isn’t empty!”
“Hmm.”
Yeah, this was the worst decision of his life, actually. When he dies he hopes he is buried far, far away from this evil woman.
“Anyway,” Qiao Ling says, clipped, “like I said, we need intent. Tell me,” she levels a look at Cheng Xiaoshi, “when you think of Lu Guang, what comes to mind?”
His response is embarrassingly immediate. “Cats.”
She nods. “Okay, well, we can’t get him a literal animal, but that’s good to work with.”
“He likes stuff like that,” Cheng Xiaoshi adds on. “Like one time I forced him to pick a favorite Sanrio character and he chose Cinnamoroll. He likes lightness, sleekness, baby blue. That kinda thing.” He rubs his temple. “I’ve online shopped for stuff of that nature already and nothing jumped out at me.”
Qiao Ling begins to walk towards the stores as Cheng Xiaoshi follows in tow, narrowly avoiding a couple sprinting in the other direction. “Keep that at the front of your mind,” she instructs, side stepping a woman with way too many bags on her arms. It is very crowded. God, this is the absolute worst. “What else? What about experiences?”
“Photography.” It’s an obvious answer and he knows he doesn’t need to talk about it, but does anyway. “It’s—It’s not necessarily a camera thing, though, y’know? Like, I don’t wanna give him a camera or anything. I just, y’know, associate him with walking around a park and taking photos out of anything we see. Making beauty out of nothing. Bullshit like that.”
The two finally find a spot that’s a little away from the crowds. “That’s not bullshit,” Qiao Ling corrects. “We can work with that. We don’t have to get him a camera, but something that reminds him of that experience with you.” She points directly at his chest. “That is what makes a gift personal. Emotional reminders.”
Cheng Xiaoshi looks around and spots a store from across the walkway. It’s a little old and unique looking, with quite an alternative window display. It felt like a memory, like nostalgia.
“There,” he points it out to Qiao Ling as she turns to see it for herself. “I’m gonna look in there.”
Her eyes spark with clairvoyance. “Nice find, there has to be something good in there.” She turns back around to him. “I’m gonna keep looking around. If you can’t find anything that speaks to you fully, or whatever, keep in mind the little things. Your budget lets us be frugal.” She pulls out her phone. “Meet back here in twenty minutes?”
“Sounds good.”
The two part as Cheng Xiaoshi maneuvers his way through the literal sea of shoppers because, genuinely, who are these people. It’s pissing him off a little. He knows it’s unreasonable but also it isn’t and these people should all go home so he can panic about his situation in peace. Lu Guang’s gift needs his full attention. His frantic, stupid brain feels like it’s going a mile a minute and that is absolutely not helping.
He makes his way to the storefront and yanks open the door a bit too harshly. He was right about it from the window display—the interior is full of little trinkets, unique articles of clothing. It feels like a thrift store with how peculiar and non-cohesive things feel. That’s not very Lu Guang, but he needs to keep his options open.
There’s a very bored looking employee at the desk, leaning back on the counter with a phone in her hand, mindlessly scrolling. Cheng Xiaoshi wishes he could do that. He wishes he was anywhere but this goddamn mall. She looks up as she hears the store’s bell ring and gives him a once-over before looking back down at her phone.
Cheng Xiaoshi takes to checking out the shelves on his right. There’s a couple trinkets of interest, like a clock and a white cat, but the clock is ugly and the cat’s paint is chipped. Just his luck.
The clothing section seemed promising at first glance, but Cheng Xiaoshi is rudely reminded that Lu Guang is horrific to get clothes for. He hates everything, except for that stupid cat hat for some reason. He’ll probably pretend to like whatever Cheng Xiaoshi got him, but that’s not good enough. He needs to be awed.
Some of the accessories are more his speed. Lu Guang had his ears pierced a couple years ago, and very occasionally wears earrings to ensure the holes don’t heal. Something fun would suit him, but not too flashy. He wants this to be something Lu Guang actually uses, not a fancy desk decoration.
He’s frantically pacing around the store for several minutes, picking up the same shirt he picked up just a second ago, before someone interrupts him.
“Dude,” the employee says, eyebrows raised but still mostly disinterested. “You’re gonna give yourself gray hairs if you keep that up.”
Cheng Xiaoshi scowls. “Yeah, thanks, didn’t notice.” He knows he sounds snarky, but his brain is so scrambled he can’t bring himself to care. This shirt isn’t too expensive. Maybe if he grips the hanger hard enough it’ll magically transform into the best gift he’s ever laid his eyes upon and then all of his problems can go away.
A beat passes before the employee sighs and sets down her phone on the counter, exhausted. “Okay, I’ll bite. What are you shopping for?”
He doesn’t answer her, looking off to the side and focusing on a necklace’s price tag until she loftily adds: “Or, maybe I should say, who?”
Cheng Xiaoshi’s shoulders rise just a little as he snaps his eyes back at her, but this girl must have the eyes of a hawk because she breaks into a smile. “Oh, it’s a special someone, huh?”
Well, no backing out now. What more does he have to lose at this point, right?
He sighs and stuffs his hands in his jacket pockets. “He’s my roommate. And best friend. And—yeah. Whatever. Every year he and my sister beat my ass at gift giving and I thought this was gonna be the year I finally break the streak.” He waves his hand defeatedly. “But I'm not having any luck on his gift.”
She narrows her eyes. “No luck at all, huh?”
“None, and it’s pissing me off.” Cheng Xiaoshi sounds like a petulant child. He probably looks the part, too. This poor employee can’t be older than he is. He would feel bad for her, if not for the fact that the world is ending and it’s not his fault he’s panicking.
“Hmm.” The employee’s gaze drifts behind her desk, debating something, before she seems to decide. “Alright. My name’s Hai Ning.”
“…Cheng Xiaoshi,” he answers back, albeit hesitantly.
Hai Ning nods. “So, Cheng Xiaoshi,” she leans on the counter and suddenly there’s a little bit of a devious look in her eyes. “You can’t think of a gift for your friend or roommate or whatever.” He’s about to protest her mockery, but she barrels on ahead. “I’m assuming if you’ve resorted to this hole in the wall, you’ve exhausted most of your options?”
Cheng Xiaoshi shrugs. “Pretty much, yeah. I’ve been looking for ages. I don’t even have a tight budget this time, miraculously. It’s just a lack of ideas. Nothing seems right for him, y’know?” He rubs his temple. “It’s been exhausting, if anything.”
“You probably shouldn’t stress this badly over it,” she observes with an almost quiet amount of sass.
“And like, I know that, in practice. But—” he flips his hand around, searching for the words.
“You work best under stress?”
Cheng Xiaoshi snaps his fingers and gapes at her. “Yeah. How’d you know?”
Hai Ning smiles a little, almost contemplative. “My little brother’s the same way. Always got his head in the clouds, eyes bigger than his brain. You said you had a sister?” She shakes her head, wistfully. “She probably has her hands full with you, the poor thing.”
“Hey.”
“But, that means I know your logic is bullshit.” Hai Ning twirls her long ponytail around her sharp nails. “My brother thinks he can take over the world if he puts enough pressure on himself, but the truth is, people aren’t invincible. Even the strongest, calmest, most stable people on this planet have that thing that breaks them.”
Cheng Xiaoshi blinks. “Surely my thing isn’t gift giving?”
“No, that’s not what I’m suggesting.” She shakes her head. “If you’re anything like my brother, what breaks you isn’t necessarily a thing, but a prolonged state. Like—like the longer you stay stressed and overthinking, the worse your decision making will be.” She folds her hair over her shoulder, pointing at herself. “If you ask me, I think you have to be thinking about it too much. If you’re as close to him as I’m gauging, you have to know tons about him.”
“I do!” He insists. “I’m—he’s my person, you know? I’ve known him for so long, we literally live together and run a business together…and I think, maybe, that pressure is getting to me?” Cheng Xiaoshi groans. “I just, y’know, wanna give him something to show how thankful I am.”
Hai Ning stares at him for a moment. “Well, you don’t need a gift to do that, do you?”
Cheng Xiaoshi tilts his head, confused. “I mean—I do, though? Isn’t that the point of gift giving?”
“No,” she says, a little slowly, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “If that was the point, you wouldn’t be in a shitty thrift shop, you’d be shopping for gold necklaces next door.”
“I don’t have that kind of money.”
“If you did, would you be over there?” she presses.
“No,” he answers, way too automatic. “I’d…I’d probably be in this store, still.”
“See,” Hai Ning says, gesturing to him. “It’s not about the material value or the gift itself at all. The gift doesn’t say anything. You do.” She taps the counter. “Why did you come into this store, specifically?”
He blinks. “Because…” Cheng Xiaoshi trails off as he looks around the store. Hai Ning described it very well with hole-in-the-wall. The things in here aren’t very outstanding or lavish. Many of them are hand-me-downs, given away to a thrift store because they no longer fit in their homes. It’s a weird amalgamation of things, with decor and trinkets and clothes and jewelry. They all have a story, but they all seem so nothing at first glance. It takes a good eye to see something good in a subject. It takes a good lens, too. Cameras are always the win—wait.
“Wait,” he parrots out loud. “That’s it! Holy shit, I can’t believe I didn’t think about that!”
Hai Ning furrows her brows, bewildered at his outburst. “What? Think about what?”
Cheng Xiaoshi frantically checks his watch. Lu Guang typically wakes up from naps and wants a meal in about an hour. That’s doable. He can pick it up and fill in Qiao Ling before that. Oh, he feels like a genius.
“Thank you so much!” he says, digging in his pockets as fast as he can. He pulls out his money and sifts through it before slamming down one hundred yuan on the table. “Here, thanks for the advice!”
He’s already halfway to the door by the time Hai Ning registers what just happened, her eyes flicking back and forth between Cheng Xiaoshi and the money rapidly. “Wait, wait, what? One hundred yuan?! Is this— I don’t—”
Cheng Xiaoshi has a hand on the door now, nearly opening it. “Consider it a generous tip!”
“You didn’t even buy anything,” she stresses.
He shrugs. “You probably saved me from a humiliating gift opening from my sister, and that is a priceless thing. Besides,” he grins, “maybe you can get your brother something with it. Keep him out of his own head.”
Hai Ning gapes at him before she blinks, hard, several times. “Yeah. Yeah, I—I should. I think he’d really like that.” She grins back. “I’m pocketing half of this, though.”
Cheng Xiaoshi pulls open the door, laughing. “I don’t blame you!” As he’s leaving, he cups a hand around his mouth. “Happy holidays, Hai Ning!”
She’s still shocked, marveling at the money, before she shakes herself out of it and waves at him. “Happy holidays, Cheng Xiaoshi!” And the door shuts with a click.
It occurred to him so fast, so fast it nearly took the breath out of his chest. Hai Ning was right. He had been looking all wrong. God, he can’t believe how elated he feels. It’s like a shining angel came down and took the pressure off of his shoulders. Getting a thousand yuan is great and all, but this is even better. Cheng Xiaoshi hasn’t felt this smart in a long time.
He weaves around people at record pace, narrowly avoiding some poor tiny woman carrying way too many beverages. It takes him awhile before he spots Qiao Ling exiting a clothing store, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration as she tries to find her next target.
Cheng Xiaoshi grabs her by the arm before she can take off. “Qiao Ling! Qiao Ling, I am a genius.”
“You’re a what?” she asks, bewildered. “Are you done already? It’s only been, like, ten minutes—”
“No time!” Cheng Xiaoshi stresses, tugging her arm and leading her away from the stores. “We have to stop by somewhere else. I’ll fill you in on the way.”
Qiao Ling lets herself be dragged for a few moments before she wrenches her arm out of his grasp and speeds up, slipping out of the large mall crowd. She pokes him in the chest. “Did you have an epiphany in that thrift store?”
Cheng Xiaoshi grabs her by the shoulders, beaming at her. “Yes, l did. I am going to kick your ass at this year’s exchange,” he says, shaking her a little by the grip he has on her. “Just you wait!”
She barks out a laugh before shoving her brother away. “Maybe in your dreams.” She dusts off her outfit before putting her hands on her hips and fixing Cheng Xiaoshi with another one of her looks. “Alright then, Xiaoshi. What’s your master plan?”
His grin turns sharp. This is gonna be fun.
————
In every single capacity of the world, Cheng Xiaoshi is acting strange.
This isn’t weird at all, on its own. Lu Guang is very used to him by now. He’d probably be more concerned if Cheng Xiaoshi suddenly started to act normal.
Which, funnily enough, is exactly what’s happening.
Lu Guang has an inkling that it has to do with the gift exchange. In past years, Cheng Xiaoshi has given him jewelry, decor for his desk, even a new camera, and everytime he’s been relatively the same about it. He seems awfully dejected when giving Lu Guang the gift, but once he expresses how much he likes it, Cheng Xiaoshi is back to being a dog in a human’s body.
It’s a simple way of life. Lu Guang likes it simple.
Now, though, Cheng Xiaoshi and Qiao Ling are making the finishing touches to their feast. Xu Shanshan and Dong Yi aren’t expected to arrive until later in the night, so it’s just the three of them for their holiday meal. Typically, Cheng Xiaoshi is a mess of things, scrambling around every which way to do as much work as possible. He likes the pressure, he’s told Lu Guang before. But instead of wishing he could multiply, Lu Guang can spot Cheng Xiaoshi calmly stirring the pot in front of him while nudging Qiao Ling and whispering to her. It feels awfully conspiratorial. Which, for them, isn’t weird to see, either… but for this time of year? Definitely strange.
He tries not to think about it too much. Cheng Xiaoshi, Qiao Ling, these versions of them, are so much like the rest. Cheng Xiaoshi is still Cheng Xiaoshi. He’s walking and breathing and making food in their kitchen, just like he should be. Past iterations of him haunt Lu Guang in every interaction. Every leaf that falls, every drop of water, every flurry of snow. It’s like he’s a ghost, a ghost that can never contact anyone. A spirit left to wander nature and become a part of every beat of life.
Qiao Ling feels like a quieter one. She’s still everywhere, in everything, floating around the same way her brother does. But her presence is more … punctual. While Cheng Xiaoshi floats about almost aimlessly, following Lu Guang like a lost duckling, Qiao Ling finds a way to him in the hardest moments. Like a cruel, cruel reminder that Cheng Xiaoshi isn’t the only person he failed to save.
It’s a heavy, heavy presence. Lu Guang takes it horribly.
“Here you go!”
Lu Guang violently flinches as Cheng Xiaoshi sets his plate down in front of him, full of dumplings and soup and that damn noodle recipe.
Cheng Xiaoshi sets down a glass of water for him as well, giving him a once over. “You okay? You look serious.”
He shakes his head slowly, trying to reel himself in. He keeps doing this lately, getting lost in his own head, letting fate guide his mind instead of his own will. It must be bad if Cheng Xiaoshi is starting to notice it, too. “I’m okay,” he finally answers, his voice a little shot. “I’m just… it’s a stressful season, I guess.”
November was a month ago. Lu Guang’s fingers dig into his leg.
“Oh,” Cheng Xiaoshi says. “Yeah, I get that. Um…” he looks over at the kitchen, where Qiao Ling is fighting to dish the exact dumpling she wants out of the pan, before he turns back to Lu Guang and smiles. “Maybe you’ll feel better when I crush you guys at the exchange.”
“Over my dead body!” Qiao Ling exclaims, strutting her way over to them and sitting down on the chair near the couch. “There’s no way what you have for us is that good. Simply no way.”
Cheng Xiaoshi scoffs, sitting down next to Lu Guang with his own plate in hand. “You have such little faith in me.”
Lu Guang pats him on the shoulder in fake consolation and Cheng Xiaoshi gives him a hearty smack on the knee.
Dinner goes smoothly. They crack jokes, they chat, they reminisce. At some point, Cheng Xiaoshi spills a bit of his soup on his lap and Lu Guang watches him out of the corner of his eye as he tries to clean it, a little too calmly. He exchanges a look with Qiao Ling and she shrugs.
There’s definitely something going on here. Maybe this is a better use of his thinking strength than the conundrum he faces all too often.
Lu Guang takes everyone’s plates and delegates himself to dish duty while the siblings prepare their living room for the ultimate showdown. It'll go down in history books, Lu Guang is sure, even if it’s only documented in his journal. There’s too much at stake, too many possibilities could occur, or something like that. Lu Guang didn’t pay enough attention to Cheng Xiaoshi’s very inspiring speech a minute earlier.
He tries to peek into the living room to spot either of his companions, but neither of them are in his line of sight. He’s about to dismiss this until he hears a thump from upstairs and Qiao Ling making shushing noises. Huh. Not suspicious at all.
Speaking of suspicions, Cheng Xiaoshi is way too calm about all of this. It makes him feel like a doppelgänger, even if Lu Guang knows that’s not the case. Or, well, it could be. If he can look into photos and see the future, anything could be possible. But doppelgängers don’t extend his frame of logic enough to really consider it. Maybe they should. He’s always known his logic has been flawed. He’s just never had the heart to fix it. Couldn’t imagine why.
“Hey man,” the man of the hour himself pops his head into the kitchen. “I’m gonna open all of the gifts for you if you don’t hurry up. Qiao Ling might just bite through the wrapping paper like a dog.”
“I’m sure she would.”
“She would! She’s a savage beast.”
“Yes, she is.”
Cheng Xiaoshi rolls his eyes and takes the rest of the plates before dumping them in the sink, grabbing onto Lu Guang’s hands. “Just leave them, okay? We’ll handle it later.”
Lu Guang blinks, a bit confused, before nodding a little and following Cheng Xiaoshi into their living room.
Qiao Ling is setting down her two gifts next to her chair as she looks over her shoulder at them. “Aha! Okay, okay, perfect.” She sits down and crosses her legs, and Lu Guang thinks she looks like a supervillain. This can’t be good.
Confused, Lu Guang ducks into the storage cabinet near the red room and grabs the two gifts from behind his large winter coat. The siblings are whispering to each other when he walks back into the living room and this is definitely not good.
“Sit, sit!” Cheng Xiaoshi ushers. When Lu Guang does so, he claps and a blinding grin stretches across his face. “Okay, Time Photo Studio gift exchange, commence!”
Qiao Ling immediately chucks her gift at Cheng Xiaoshi, landing square on his face as he jerks backwards in surprise. By the sound of the bonk it wasn’t a heavy gift, but still durable.
“Ow! Hey, what the hell?” he complains, rubbing his face.
“Open mine first,” she insists, handing her gift to Lu Guang. “Both of you.”
Unsurprisingly, Qiao Ling is a little too good at this. Cheng Xiaoshi eagerly opens his gift to see a couple of dog charms for his bags and a small sheet of paper. After about thirty seconds of reading, Cheng Xiaoshi explodes in a flurry of limbs as he practically squeaks at his sister.
“No way, no way,” he says. “The shelter? I had no idea that—that they even do—”
“Do you remember that short girl that was always in my dorm? Xu Shanshan’s classmate?” she presses. “Well, she’s one of the veterenarians on call there and got me on the phone with their supervisor. After a little bit of probing, I convinced her to let you play with their new shelter puppies whenever you’d like.”
Cheng Xiaoshi is elated. “I can…play with puppies?”
“And cats, too, I think,” she adds. “Lu Guang can go, too, especially if there’s cats. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind multiple people.” She folds her hands into her lap and tilts her head contemplative. “I think…I think you two stress a lot, you know? And you’re always so high strung after our missions. Stuff like this, playing with puppies or whatever…it’ll help keep you grounded. Or, I hope it will, anyhow.” She wrings her hands out a little, a nervousness etching her expression. “Same with your gift, Lu Guang.”
He blinks, still moved by her words, as he focuses his attention on the envelope in front of him. He opens it carefully to reveal what looks like a ticket. He pulls it out and Lu Guang swears his eyes almost bug out of his head.
It’s a free orchestra pass. He can just…show up to the orchestra in the city whenever he wants, listen to the lovely melodies, let himself drift in a manner he can control. Let himself be free without having to think, think, think. He thinks his hands are shaking as he lifts his gaze to Qiao Ling.
“I…wow. I mean, this, you—” Lu Guang struggles at the words, tears already pricking at his eyes and this exchange has barely even started, god damnit!
“I know you really like classical music,” she says, smiling. “Dong Yi told me about how much you loved going to that orchestra with him, so I pulled a few strings. It’s for a year at the moment, but I think Dong Yi mentioned he could wring out more from the concert director if need be. Apparently, they met at a grad school party—”
“Thank you,” Lu Guang says, finally finding his voice. “I really—yeah. I think this’ll help…with everything. The missions.” He swallows thickly, face hot as he tries not to cry. He’s not sure if she’s even aware of how much this means to him. He finds it difficult to try and get the words to do so out of his mouth, anyway.
And Qiao Ling is beaming, face absolutely alight at seeing the two so happy, and Lu Guang knows there’s no place in the world he’d rather be. Not even the orchestra.
“Okay,” Cheng Xiaoshi says. “Okay, god, I’m already emotional. Was last year this bad?” Lu Guang chuckles a little, wiping the corners of his own eyes before Cheng Xiaoshi rounds on him. “You’re up, man.”
“…I am?”
“Yep.”
Well, shit, here goes nothing.
Lu Guang hands both of his friends their gifts and pulls at the edge of his long sleeve shirt as he watches them open it. It’s a very hard feat to go after Qiao Ling, which is probably why Cheng Xiaoshi threw him under the goddamn bus. He’ll get his revenge, hopefully, because that is a dirty play.
Qiao Ling opens hers first and she gasps loudly. “Oh my gosh, wait.” She throws aside the Hello Kitty tissue paper, which took way too long to find, by the way, and screams a little. “Lu Guang! How the hell did you know?”
She pulls out of the box a new pair of shoes. They’re fancy, decorated and embroidered with Hello Kitty themes all over it. There’s even a few charms dangling off of the heel. They’re very her, he thinks. Even if she’s not the most into Sanrio, the shoes are objectively beautiful either way.
He clears his throat. “You talked about how you wanted to expand your shoe collection,” he says. “Hopefully this is a good start?”
“A very good start!” She says, clapping her hands together. “I love them, Lu Guang. You have to tell me where you bought them from, okay?”
He smiles, a small thing. “Are you returning them already? Such a shame.”
She grins back. “Yeah, they’re ugly as shit.”
“So I see.”
But Qiao Ling isn’t looking at him anymore. Her eyes are caught over Lu Guang’s right shoulder and he glances over to see Cheng Xiaoshi marveling at the contents of his gift. His mouth is opening and closing like a fish flopping around on shore, his hands spasming just a little on the box.
Lu Guang suddenly gets very, very nervous. Cheng Xiaoshi always gets loud when he’s happy. Does this mean he doesn’t like it? Maybe it was too unexpected if he’s just staring in shock—
But then Cheng Xiaoshi snaps his head towards Lu Guang and smiles, real and huge. “Dude, dude, really? This—I’m—for real?”
Lu Guang looks down at his lap, picking at his sleeve again, and smiles a little. “Yes. For real.”
Cheng Xiaoshi grins, a shaky thing split across his face as he takes out two signed posters. The first is an elaborate art of Chainsaw Man, vibrant colors swatched all over the page, and the other is a less flashy boxing poster, featuring the legendary fight that Shuang Hai had narrowly won. Cheng Xiaoshi’s awed eyes switch between the two at rapid speeds before he finally notices the real kicker.
“Wait, holy shit, this is signed?” he exclaims, running his fingers over the names scribbled onto the Chainsaw Man poster. “These are—”
“All of the original cast, yes,” Lu Guang says, brushing Cheng Xiaoshi’s sleeve as he points to a certain name. “That’s Denji’s voice actor, by the way.”
Cheng Xiaoshi is still slack jawed. “I—I can’t even—”
Lu Guang nudges him. “You should look at the back of the Shuang Hai poster, too.”
After sending a skeptical look his way, Cheng Xiaoshi slowly turns it over to reveal the message. It’s signed, dated and written exclusively for him in the corner of the poster. It reads: Didn’t want to write this on the front and mess up my beautiful face. Your best friend wishes you happy holidays, from him and from me. He told me you’re a very strong person, strong in your conviction, just like I am. It’s very important you keep that spirit alive. You’ll never know what unexpected matches you’ll be able to come out of. Best wishes, my friend Cheng Xiaoshi! —Shuang Hai.
Cheng Xiaoshi seems to read it once himself before he angles it enough to allow Qiao Ling to read it too. Lu Guang tries to catch his gaze but he’s still shell shocked, it seems.
“Woah, woah, Lu Guang,” Qiao Ling says. “How did you even get him to agree to that?”
Lu Guang smiles. “He had a fan meet and greet two hours outside of the city. I bought the poster on the spot and took it there. I think…I think him seeing me there, even if I didn’t care for him or boxing at all, moved him. He told me he values friendships like that, that he almost lost one himself.” God, he’s getting emotional again. What’s in the air today? “The note was his idea. Thought that you’d really like the surprise.”
Pieces seem to be coming together in Cheng Xiaoshi’s head before he looks at Lu Guang, eyes darting between his own. “Wait, the fan meet and greet—that was in July, wasn’t it? I wanted to go, but I thought it was too far. And where—how did you even—”
“Xu Shanshan covered for me,” he explained. “And successfully so, it seems.”
Suddenly, Cheng Xiaoshi wraps an arm around Lu Guang and shakes him by the shoulders, pressing his forehead against his temple. “Thank you,” he says, voice cracking a little. “You’re like a magician with this shit. Both of you are,” he says to Qiao Ling, letting Lu Guang out of his death grip.
Qiao Ling suddenly sits up very straight and looks Cheng Xiaoshi in the eyes, an intensity there that seems unbecoming of her, normally. He sits up straighter too. Yep, definitely suspicious.
“It’s your turn, Xiaoshi,” she says, a wickedness to her tone.
Cheng Xiaoshi smiles, but it’s nervous. “Ah, yeah, um. Right.” He hands Qiao Ling her gift first, and Lu Guang immediately notices there’s not another box with him. Huh…maybe it’s not in the room yet? Did he forget about it?
But he’s immediately distracted by Qiao Ling squeaking in delight. Her eyes once again bug out of her head as she excitedly examines the fluffy bag in front of her. “Xiaoshi, this is so cute. Oh my god, it goes with the shoes.” She nearly kicks her feet in joy as she looks at both of her gifts. “I’m gonna blind people on the street with how cute they are! I love it, I love it!” She leans over a lot to whack Cheng Xiaoshi on the shin with the bag, which he seems to understand as a thank you. Sibling talk is weird. But Cheng Xiaoshi just laughs and throws a box back at her, delighted at her reaction.
Qiao Ling sets down her gifts and places her hands in her lap. “And then there was one, hmm?” she says to Lu Guang, who looks over at Cheng Xiaoshi, confused. Indeed, there are no other boxes in the room that could contain Lu Guang’s gift. They’ve always done a physical thing to represent the gift even if it isn’t physical, like the form of Cheng Xiaoshi’s puppy visits. Lu Guang really hopes he didn’t genuinely forget.
“Yeah. Whew, okay, here goes nothing.” Cheng Xiaoshi stands and stretches a little before grabbing Lu Guang’s hand and yanking him up too. “We gotta travel for this one. It’s, um, upstairs.”
Upstairs. That must be what they were doing when Lu Guang was doing the dishes. He remembers them conveniently disappearing a couple times before that, too. What could this thing even be?
“There better not be an alive creature in our room, Cheng Xiaoshi,” Lu Guang warns as they all climb the stairs.
He laughs, boisterous and bright. “Oh, I wish. But you know our landlady, she’s such a stickler.”
“Yes, I’m aware of her extremely unfair policies.”
“You two better shut it,” Qiao Ling threatens as the two exchange a glance and a chuckle.
And Lu Guang thinks, no, knows, that he’d give up the world for these people. Maybe he already has.
They make it to Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang’s shared room as Cheng Xiaoshi turns around to face him. The air is electric, sparked by his nerves as he rapidly taps his fingers on the door behind him.
“Okay,” he says, voice shaky. “Um. My gift for you is kind of … everywhere. It’s a little weird. You’ll see. Qiao Ling, uh, helped me set it all up, too.”
Lu Guang smiles, trying to soothe his very panicked friend. “That’s where you’re run off all afternoon?”
He nods. “Yeah. Um. I really…really hope you like it.”
With no other preamble, Cheng Xiaoshi opens the door.
…
…
And at first, Lu Guang has no idea where to look.
There's so much, everywhere, surrounding the room, and it takes him an embarrassingly long amount of time until he realizes exactly what he’s looking at.
Photographs. Tons, and tons, and tons of photographs.
There are some hanging from the ceiling, dangling precariously by string and yarn. He reaches up and observes exactly what it is. It’s a nature photo from the park in the city. Well, mostly a nature photo. He can see Cheng Xiaoshi in the corner of it pretty far away, his hands up in the air and waving frantically at something. The leaves were falling just right that day, he needed to take a picture. He needed to conserve the memory.
He turns towards the wall. There’s many sequence photos thumbtacked to the wall. Selfies from Xu Shanshan when they would go out to hotpot. The one time Lu Guang got absolutely wasted at a bar in the inner part of the city and it took everyone embarrassingly long to get home. One where Qiao Ling is laughing, holding boba with an obscene amount of tapioca pearls. One where Lu Guang is under a street light in the snow. Cheng Xiaoshi had insisted it was like he was out of a movie and made him stand there for several minutes just taking pictures.
There’s so, so many more. They litter this room, this shared space, like a mosaic of everyone he has ever loved. They’re smiling, laughing with each other. It tugs at his heart again and again and again. This is his life. Their lives. These people he’s grown with, learned with. People that he would give his life for if it meant they could stay on this planet instead.
He’s silent as he looks around. He can feel Cheng Xiaoshi’s gaze on him the whole time, but it’s grounding more than it’s heavy. Lu Guang feels how nervous he is even if he isn’t looking at him. It’s sweet. It’s maybe the sweetest gesture he’s ever received.
Cheng Xiaoshi is picking at his fingers. “I, um. I asked everyone to give me their favorite pictures. Not just of you, but of all of us.” He gestures around. “It’s…all of us, y’know?” He shakes his head and laughs wetly. “Sorry, I’m not great with, um, words, right now.”
Lu Guang turns to him, and now there are tears in his eyes. He can tell it surprises Cheng Xiaoshi to see him in this state but he can’t bring himself to care right now. “It’s okay,” he says, barely a whisper. “I’m not either.”
Qiao Ling ducks under their shared desk before pulling out a box and shoving it in Lu Guang’s hands, an assured look on her face. “Now open this.”
“Don’t order him around,” Cheng Xiaoshi grumbles. “It’s my gift.”
She punches him in the arm as he winces.
Lu Guang wipes his tears on his sleeve as he begins to open the present. It’s decently heavy, decently sized. He’s just unsure why he couldn’t open this downstairs.
But then he pulls it out. A camera. And not just any camera, not like one laying around in their equipment closet downstairs, but a real—
“Polaroid camera,” Lu Guang breathes, picking it up with shaky hands. It’s old, clearly, but in perfect condition. It feels weighted in his hands. It feels perfect.
Cheng Xiaoshi nods. “A few weeks ago, someone told me that gifts aren’t actually about what you give, but what you say.” He begins to pace the room a little. “And I never knew how to get you something that would properly convey what I want to tell you, y’know? It’s hard, it really is. But I realized that—that I was thinking about it all wrong.” He walks up to Lu Guang and places a hand under his, holding the camera with him. “You and I get lost in our own heads, literally and figuratively. And I think in the mess of these powers and these missions and the weight of the world, we forget that we’re still human. You’re a person, Lu Guang. And so am I.” He squeezes his hand before dropping it, smiling at him probably the most broken and emotional thing Lu Guang has ever seen in his life. “I want you to use this camera to remind yourself of that. And me, hopefully. We—we’re not alone in this fight. We’ve got each other, and Qiao Ling, and our friends, and—” He cuts himself off, voice wobbling. “And I never want you to feel like you’re alone, okay?”
Tears are already trickling down Lu Guang’s face. Shaking, he sets down the camera ever so gently, gives Cheng Xiaoshi one more look, swiftly walks over to him and throws his arms around him in a firm hug.
Cheng Xiaoshi’s breath stutters in surprise before he’s hugging him too, laughing as both of them cry. There’s a hand clutching his hair and a breath close to his ear. “I’m here, okay?”
And god, oh god, that did it.
Lu Guang buries his face into his shoulder and cries. It’s an ugly thing, as silent as it is, but he can feel this weight leave him as they claw out of his throat. Qiao Ling weasels her way into the hug and Lu Guang laughs pathetically, wrapping an arm around her as well. The three are all crying a little, Lu Guang the most, huddled amongst glimpses of lives that seem so trivial. It’s nothing special, right? It’s just people, just their friends, just their lives. It’s just photographs in a cramped room above a random small business.
But he loves these people and their lives. He loves them. He would never give them up for the world. He really does need that camera, now that he thinks about it. There’s so much more to capture, to hold and treasure until the day he dies. Maybe that’s why they have powers, him and Cheng Xiaoshi. Maybe they’re meant to carry the lives of these people and love regardless of it all.
Lu Guang tightens his hold on these two people that he loves, that he has given so much for and will do so forever, until he finally pulls back a little. They let him go, arms slowly sliding off of bodies until everyone is a snot-faced mess.
Cheng Xiaoshi is staring at him, laughing a little. “You’re a mess, man.”
“I know,” he says, wiping his tears again as he sniffles. “You are too, asshole.”
On the other side of the room, Qiao Ling leans on her tiptoes to reach the tissues on the shelf, taking some for herself before passing them along to the other two.
“God, look at us, huh?” she croaks, blowing her nose very loudly. “We’re all a mess.”
Lu Guang nods, blowing his nose and swallowing around the lumps in his throat.
“That’s alright,” Cheng Xiaoshi says, chuckling as he puts an arm around his sister. “I like us messy. It’s better.”
Qiao Ling laughs too, putting an arm around him and pinching his side as he yelps. “Yeah. It is.”
There’s so much on his mind. Lu Guang could never tell them, he thinks. Definitely not here. It’s too much, it’s too far, and he has no idea what he’s really doing. But the lump stuck in his throat is bubbling over, and even if he can’t tell them, there’s other things he can say.
“I love you,” Lu Guang says shakily.
Cheng Xiaoshi and Qiao Ling whip their heads towards him, eyes brimming as they understand what he just said to them.
Lu Guang holds their gaze, as hard as it is, and lets it all out of him. “You—you two are everything to me, y’know? And I don’t—I know I don’t say it enough. Or, ever.” He takes another tissue and wipes his face again. His cheeks and nose are brimming hot with emotion. “But you’re my life. And I wouldn’t—wouldn’t change it for anything.”
The siblings are still for a moment before Qiao Ling nods as fast as she can. “Yeah. Yeah. I love you, too. And I wouldn’t change it, either. Not for the goddamn world,” her voice breaks at the end of it and she wraps him in another hug.
He hugs her and looks over her shoulder at Cheng Xiaoshi, who meets his eyes and there’s so much emotion there that it almost punches the air out of Lu Guang’s lungs.
He smiles. It’s wobbly again. “…I love you. A lot. Both of you. I’m—I just—”
Lu Guang smiles, tears on his face as he reaches an arm towards him. “Come here, Xiaoshi.”
The three fold into another hug, one that feels more equally balanced on who’s crying their eyes out. It’s less embarrassing for Lu Guang that way. And these people that he loves hug him just as tightly as he hugs them, and that is a goddamn gift. He’s never felt it as strongly as he does now.
He loves them. He loves this. He loves his family.
After a bit more crying and reminiscing, they hear the doorbell ring as Xu Shanshan and Dong Yi show up with drinks in hand. Qiao Ling gets herself together enough to greet them, leaving just Lu Guang and Cheng Xiaoshi in the room.
Cheng Xiaoshi hands him another tissue. “Better yet?”
“God, I don’t know,” he says, voice scratchy. “Are my eyes red?”
“Very,” Cheng Xiaoshi confirms. “You look like you’ve been smoking.”
Lu Guang rolls his eyes and it’s too fond to mean anything. Cheng Xiaoshi knows it.
They stand in comfortable silence for a second, the sounds of their friends mingling and drinks being poured downstairs before Lu Guang feels a hand on his arm. He looks over and sees Cheng Xiaoshi smiling at him. It’s such a familiar sight, one that Lu Guang instantly feels calmer at, his crazed emotional state finally starting to level.
“Did you like your present?” Cheng Xiaoshi asks.
Lu Guang pokes his arm. “You can’t guess?”
He laughs. It’s like music, one met with the most beautiful harmonies he’s ever heard as Cheng Xiaoshi opens the door and the chatter of their living room floats upstairs. They mingle together like it’s meant to be. It’s everything.
Cheng Xiaoshi gives him one more look and smile.
And Lu Guang’s world clicks back into place.