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Hopper’s frozen in place as he watches El turn around, setting her gaze on the floating rocks. She takes a few steps closer to the edge of the roof, her head held high.
Finally, he breaks out of the trance-like state he’s found himself in.
“El. Kid!” he gets out, his throat feeling tight, a lump in it.
It makes her stop in her tracks and she turns around to face him once more. Her brows are furrowed, her mahogany eyes glazed over with tears as she meets his gaze.
It takes him five long, quick steps, but then he’s crushing her to his chest, a hand on the back of her head. He cranes his neck and buries his nose in her brown hair, his eyes slipping closed. He presses his lips to the crown of her head, breathing in the scent of her lavender shampoo. He does his best to savor the moment, to memorize the feeling of her in his arms.
Her own arms come around him, holding tight. Her eyelids close as a couple of fresh tears spill down her cheeks. She sniffles softly, the sound muffled by his jacket. It makes him tighten his hold on her, his thumb gently brushing over her hair, hoping it soothes her a little.
“I love you, El,” he whispers hoarsely into her hair. “I love you so much,” his voice cracks at the last two words.
She nods against his chest, not daring to use her voice, knowing it’d break.
“And I believe in you,” he continues, despite how the lump in his throat is only growing bigger. “I always have, and I'm so, so sorry if I ever made you doubt that.”
Breathing in deeply, he moves his hands to her shoulders. He pulls her back far enough to look in her eyes, wanting her to see how he means his words from the bottom of his heart.
“I believe you can do anything you want to do. You’re so brave, so strong,” he says, his voice weak, just like it was down by the tank when he tried his best to make her realize the only outcome of this night isn’t her death. “And I trust you,” he adds, his blue gaze flickering between her tear-filled eyes. “I just want you to come back to me safely. For you to have a life without all this pain and fear.”
Her lower lip trembles as she looks up at him, beads of tears trailing down her cheeks. He wipes them away with the rough pad of his thumb, his touch gentle against her cheek.
Her hand comes up, her fingers wrapping around his wrist, her thumb brushing over Sara’s blue hair tie. It feels weird for her to not wear it anymore, her left wrist too bare, but if she doesn’t make it out of this night alive, she needs him to have it back. To always have it as a memory of his first daughter and his second.
“I know I can't change your mind if you’re set on something,” he says, a little smile breaking through the tears, “But please know that there’s a way for all of this to end without you dying.”
He wants nothing more than to just beg her to not sacrifice her own life, but he knows it’s no use. She wants him to respect her choice, and he’ll do his damnest best to do so, even if he can already feel his heart cracking at the thought of losing her.
“And…” He lets out a sigh. He feels the need to do his best to fix everything that’s fallen apart between them over the course of the last while, to have the air cleared between them. “Kid, I’m sorry I scared you with that vest. I never should’ve done that, okay? You have every right to be mad at me.”
A tear runs down his cheek, disappearing into his overgrown beard. El hates the beard, she’s told him that several times. It makes you look old, she said one night with a teasing grin on her face. The thought almost makes him quirk a little smile, but it doesn’t. The fear of losing her is too strong, too real.
“I’m just sorry. For everything,” he whispers, wishing he hadn’t made so many mistakes with her. “I just want you safe more than anything.”
He brushes his thumb gently against her cheek, his palm holding her jaw. His eyes roam over her beautiful face, doing his best to tuck it into memory in case this is the last time he’ll ever see her. Just the thought of it makes several tears escape his eyes, his cheeks growing wetter by every passing second.
For the last few years one of his only missions has just been to keep her safe, especially the past year and a half. His biggest fear is losing her, but now… it might happen. He can’t even think of a life without her—a life without both his daughters.
He wishes he could just freeze time, stay in this moment with her for the rest of forever.
“I love you too, Dad,” she says, her voice trembling.
He can’t help the way his face contorts as more salt water wells up in her eyes.
Dad.
He closes his eyes tight, more tears rolling down his face.
She’s only called him that a few times, but this time, this time it feels heavier, like it’s the last time he’ll ever hear that word come out of her mouth.
He draws in a deep, steadying breath and opens his eyes back up, finding her looking up at him with teary, doe-like eyes. He can't help but think for a brief moment of how much she resembles Joyce, despite the two of them not being biologically related in any way.
He places a hand on her shoulder and gives it a gentle squeeze. “Go save the world, kid,” he says, his voice croaky. A smile finds its way to his lips as another tear trails down his cheek.
She watches him for a moment more, then nods, breathing in deeply. A teary smile finds her face, one he tucks into memory, keeping it close to his heart in case this is the last time he ever sees it. She gives his hand one last squeeze, then turns on her heel and sets into a run. Once she reaches the edge, she jumps.
He watches with a bated breath, his heart not far from jumping out of his chest.
It feels like she’s in the air for whole minutes, time slowing down as he watches her, but then she lands safely on the first stone. He lets out a sigh of relief, a pang of proudness spreading through his chest.
She stands up and pushes with her powers herself further up in the air. She again lands safely, and he can breathe again, just for a moment.
He watches as she prepares to jump to the third one, heart in his throat, fear thrumming in his veins.
And then she’s gone. Disappeared into the clouds, hued red from the unnaturally colored lightning.
He lets out another relieved breath, thankful their training paid off and that she at least safely made it into the Abyss. But it doesn’t do much to quell his fear. A sea of questions floats around in his brain. What is she gonna find up there? Can she defeat Vecna? Will she come back down? Return to him?
He’s never been a religious man, but he finds himself silently praying to whatever god is possibly up there that she’ll come back to him.
That his girl will survive.