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Another day in the Outer Ring, another brawl between Overlord and advisor.
Lucy, in all her refined and dignified glory, that befitting a noble lady, had just broken her own personal record for the single longest argument she'd had yet with the boar she called boss. At a staggering three whole hours, Lucy, for lack of a better term, was absolutely fucking exhausted. No matter how many times she tried to pivot the ‘conversation’ away from what they were rambling about, Caesar would almost immediately latch back on with some insane hypothetical or obviously fake story to… what, piss her off even more?
This was nothing new to Lucy, absolutely not, but for three entire hours? If she didn't collapse on the way over to Cheesetopia to wrap up her very ‘productive’ day, then maybe her legs would fail her the moment she swung the double doors open.
Suddenly, a ping from her phone buzzed in her pocket, making her flinch… Dear god… No more, please! She just barely survived the gauntlet she'd just ran, and now Caesar's still pestering her out of person?! What exactly is her problem?! “Argh! Caesar, I swear, if this is to do with that dumbass argument about whether chicken soup is vegan or not, I'M GONNA LOSE I-...” Oh… Never mind… It's actually from… “Burnice? Since when does Burnice text me so late? It's ten at night for god's sake.” Regardless, unlike someone, Lucy didn't neglect her responsibilities as the Sons of Calydon's second in command. So, naturally, she clicked the notification and got to typing.
Flame-Brain🔥: Lucy!!! Me and Pulchra saw you two in a HUGE argument before we hit the road earlier! And, get this, when we came back, you two were STILL going at it!!! Talk about commitment! LMAO
Great. So, not only was Caesar living rent free in her head, (like always) but they’d also had an audience?! If word got out that there was infighting in the Sons, this could legitimately damage their reputation. What good is a gang who's two highest ranking members are at the other's throat for three entire hours? Simply put, it isn't.
The blonde sighed, which quickly turned to a growl as she glanced back at Burnice’s message. Well, she wouldn't be the one to leave her on read. If anything, this is an opportunity to clear things up… Not that there was much misinformation in what the pyromaniac was saying anyway…
Lucy: So, what did you and Pulchra see exactly?
Flame-Brain🔥: Oh, y’know, the usual!
The usual?! They have a ‘usual’ now?!
Lucy: What do you mean ‘the usual’?! There's nothing usual about a leader and their advisor squabbling for such an extended period of time, or at all for that matter! I'll tell you what it is, Burnice, it's sad. It's sad we have an Overlord so fucking incompetent that she can't even read without my help.
God… Just typing that through gritted teeth felt awful… She didn't mind helping Caesar with her lacklustre literary skills, really, she didn't. If anything, she secretly loved watching that adorable, little smile of hers light up when she eventually pieced the puzzle together. And, oh, the praise! The sweet, sweet praise! ‘You’re a genius, Lucy!’, ‘Man, I'd be screwed without ya, Luce!’, and, best of all, only if the stars aligned, a warm, tender hug from the one she loved above all… Wait, shit! Burnice had probably typed up a storm since she started daydreaming! What the hell had she been saying while she was dozing off?!
Flame-Brain🔥: Awwww! You don't really mean that, do you, Lucy! Ik you love her! We all do!!!
“W-We all d-do…” The words barely escaped her before she ran out of breath. No fucking way! No way in hell is she saying what she thinks she is! DOES EVERYONE KNOW SHE HAS A HUGE CRUSH ON CAESAR?!
Lucy: BURNICE! If you don't keep quiet about your little ‘discovery’, I'll have you mixing vinegar and baking soda instead of nitro-fuel for the rest of your miserable life! Do you hear me?!
Almost burst a vessel there… No, wait, she did.
Flame-Brain🔥: WOW! YOU'RE MAD! YOU'RE, LIKE, REALLY, REALLY MAD! AHAHA! Is this only 1% of what Caesar had to put up with earlier while you were being all tsun tsun on her?! LOOOL!!
Tsun… tsun…?
Flame-Brain🔥: Also, I gotta ask, why would I be mixing vinegar and baking soda?
Lucy: BECAUSE I'LL DEMOTE YOU AND HAVE YOU SCRUBBING TOILETS FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS!
Flame-Brain🔥: Don't be sad, Lucy! Be glad!
Now what the hell is she yapping about?! She isn't just saying random strings of words that rhyme to satisfy that diluted brain of hers, is she?
Clenching her hands tightly around her phone, even to the point where the plastic started to crease, Lucy got to typing. Perhaps deflecting all of this ‘crush’ nonsense would be the best course of action. After all, Burnice is quite the loud mouth. If she just tells her that she's actually into Belle, then… Wait, that's a whole other nuclear level disaster she doesn't want to spring upon herself… God, what the fuck does she even do at this point? Whatever she says just seems like a lie, and honestly, it is. Ever since she ran from home and was smitten at first sight, she'd been head over heels for the one who ‘saved’ her all that time ago. Hell, at this point, she couldn't even fathom life without Caesar, nor remember how it felt to not have this soul crushing crush on her arch nemesis… Wasn't she supposed to be typing anyway? Just staring at the garbled mess of letters she'd been absentmindedly typing didn't make her feel much better either. How desperately she wanted to scream out her love from the depths of her heart to the one who so effortlessly stole it, but this is reality she's living in, and, for her dennies… Caesar was probably straight.
Flame-Brain🔥: Heyo!! Lucy! You still there?? This better be the greatest essay I've ever read, and not you being kidnapped! I'll go get Caesar if you have, she'll save you again! Hehe~
Oh, fuck, right! She's in the middle of a conversation! …Was the Caesar comment really necessary though…?
Lucy: h
Flame-Brain🔥: THE LADY LIVES!!! I was worried I'd have to send the King to save her Queen~!
Lucy: End a sentence without a !!!, ???, or ~
Flame-Brain🔥: Now why would I do something silly like that???!!!~
Lucy: Get out.
Flame-Brain🔥: ???
Lucy: You're under my skin. Get. Out.
Flame-Brain🔥: Only if you promise to swing by Cheesetopia and have a drink with me and Kitty!
So, not only had she endured through the greatest feat of mental strength that man has ever been subjected to, but, on top of that, she's being blackmailed! Cool! Great! Awesome! She's in love with this outcome! Maybe if she was as equally obnoxious with her punctuation as Burnice, she'd align with her wavelength and never have to think a complex thought again in her entire life! …At least then she'd have the guts to tell Caesar how she truly feels about her, and why she's always so angry at her… Ugh…
Lucy: If 3rd wheeling an pyromaniac and a traitor-to-be is the only decent way to spend the rest of the night, then so be it.
Wow, that was… uncalled for, to say the least. Burnice hadn't done anything wrong to her, not really. She'd actually given her a place to vent, so why the sudden hostility? …Seems like Caesar was genuinely starting to drive her mad.
Lucy: I'm sorry, Burnice. I shouldn't have said that. I'm not even going to bother to make an excuse either.
Flame-Brain🔥: meaner
Lucy: Excuse me?
Flame-Brain🔥: MEANER!!!
Lucy: You'll be dead at thirty.
Flame-Brain: YAHOO! SWING ON BY, LUCY!!! ME AND TRAITOR-TO-BE ARE WAITING~~~!!!!!
Flame-Brain: sent an image
Attached was a rather awkward looking selfie of Burnice drunkenly pulling a very angry Pulchra into frame with an enormous smile on her flushed face, arm wrapped tightly around the thirens shoulder… What would she have to do for fate to allow her the same luxury? She was already imagining the same scenario too, with her held in her Overlord's drunken, yet warm embrace, the larger woman's breath sweet with booze and her lipsti-. OK! ENOUGH! She shouldn't keep the pair waiting.
Lucy: I'm on my way as we speak.
Lucy: Sorry again for the outburst earlier. Caesar's been driving me up the wall.
Flame-Brain🔥: I think you'd like Caesar to do a little more than ‘drive’ if she had you against a wall~
Lucy: Excuse me?
Flame-Brain🔥: Oh, nothing, nothing~! See you soon!
You know, if that wasn't Burnice she'd snapped at, she'd probably be in deep shit. Well, looks like it's a ‘get so drunk you forget your own name’ type of night. It's not like every night spent with Burnice would eventually turn into a ‘get so drunk you forget your own name' night anyway.
Clicking her pink and white phone off and stashing it back into her jacket's pocket, Lucy set off, knees still aching from all the running around she'd been doing while battling Caesar.
After kicking a tumbleweed and tumbling over right onto her ass as her knees buckled, her short, few minutes stroll through the ghost town of Blazewood was finally complete, and the dimly lit restaurant stood before her. The moment she stepped through the door and inside the refurbished saloon, a pair of orange ears flickered from the very backseat of the restaurant, Burnice yelling out to get her attention.
“Lucy! Me and Kitty are over here!” With what was more of a limp than a stroll, Lucy hobbled on over and stood before the couple, arms crossed with a stern look on her face.
“Scooch, I need to sit.” She hand-waved towards them both, the pair sitting opposite glancing at the other with a tipsy half-smile.
“You need to sit?” Pulchra asked, very obviously grinning ear-to-ear from under her mask.
“Yes, I do. Now, quit being a nuisance and move.” The blonde barked back at them, signalling them again with a more aggressive flick of her wrist.
“Why?” Pulchra queried again, forcing a giggle out of the drunk opposite her.
“B-Because…” She fell on her ass while trying to take her pent up rage out on a fucking tumbleweed, but they didn't need to know that. “I fell. That is all.”
Burnice, with her drink in hand, leaned over the table and began to whisper to Pulchra, the thirens smile suddenly containing a tidal wave of laughter.
“H-Hey! What're you two gossiping about?! I'm right here, y’know!”
“Oh, nothing, nothing~!” The pyromaniac winked, downing some nitro-fuel while Lucy just stood there in a state of perpetual rage. “It's just that, I was talking to Kitty about how strong everyone is relative to each other in the gang, and it goes something like this… Caesar, Lighter, Me, Kitty, Piper…” With every name getting closer and closer to Lucy's, Burnice's best efforts to hold back the laughter deep in her throat got harder and harder until, finally… “A-And then it's tumblewe-. Ahahahaha!” Not only had they seen it, but Pulchra was also laughing her ass off?! She expected this from a simpleton like Burnice, but this sort of behaviour from someone she assumed had some remaining sanity?! Ugh… How could this day get any worse…?
“Yeah, yeah, yeah! Go ahead and laugh! It's not like I've seen you two do some embarrassing shit!” Even with her best attempt to save face, the horrifying reality that Burnice very obviously had something even more damning than that on her mind sent a lone shiver down her spine. Please, just don't bring up the weird crush, Lucy internally begged.
“Hey, Burnice. What's more embarrassing in your opinion? Falling flat on your ass trying to assault an inanimate object, or having a massive crush on your boss who you insist you hate?” Like they'd been rehearsing it, (they probably had) Burnice and Pulchra went dead silent and slowly turned their heads to face Lucy, a wide, wild smile with a brow raised on each of their faces.
“Kitty, why don't we ask the professional? She's an expert in both fields!” The flame-brain giggled, still smiling as wide as ever… Had she even blinked?! “Lucy, what would you do if you had a massive crush on your rival, and fell over trying to kill a tumbleweed on the same day?”
“Oh, I don't know. I think I'd go home, curl up into a ball and cry my eyes out.”
“Alright, she's clearly had enough. Burnice, give the lady your seat.” The thiren beckoned with a curled finger.
Instead of being a normal, rational human being and going around, Burnice, to absolutely nobody's surprise, climbed onto the table and slid into the space beside Pulchra, maniacally giggling to herself as her hands were already all over her bushy tail. “Ah~... This is the life…”
Lucy sat down opposite the couple and lifelessly turned her gaze outside the open window, looking over the very same alley she and Caesar had fought in for all that agonizing time… Was it weird to say she kinda enjoyed it? Probably. But that connection she felt with her, even when they bickered and brawled, was overwhelming… If the stockholm syndrome was starting to kick in, and she was actively yearning for a fight, she might well and truly be doomed. “Caesar…” She solemnly whispered to herself… Clearly not quietly enough though.
“Awww…” Burnice cooed, tap, tap, tapping Pulchra’s exposed shoulder. “She misses her girlfriend…”
“SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!”
“Awww, but you-.”
“QUIT ‘AWW’ING’ AT ME!” Lucy damn near screamed, a lone vain bulging out of her bright red forehead.
“Ahahaha! Alright! No more teasing, right, Pulchra?!” She nudged her companion's arm, almost as if she was trying to say, ‘We’re totally gonna annoy her some more!’. Thank god Lucy hadn't picked up on this, or else she might've died on the spot from an anger overdose, then and there.
“Agreed. No more teasing. We promise.” Pulchra slid her mask off and tucked it into her jacket, taking another sip of her drink.
Oh, right. It'd totally slipped her mind that she came here for a drink. “Fix me up a drink, bartender. It's what you do, isn't it?” The short one snarled.
“Here, Lucy!” A grating sound akin to nails on a chalkboard rang out the entire restaurant when Burnice had the oh so brilliant idea of scraping her drink across the table to Lucy, beaming at her with her usual smile. “Drink mine!”
“With your saliva all over it? Yeah, I think I'll pass.” Waving her hand back, Lucy dismissed the offer, turning her gaze back out the window.
Pulchra chuckled as she set her drink back down, glancing over to her higher-up. “I'm just saying, if it was Caesar's saliva, she'd be all over it.”
“I-I would not! That's disgusting!” She lied, pouting as she returned to her routine brooding. And that brooding definitely wasn't thinking about Caesar's lips, not in the slightest!
“Ha! You joke, Kitty, but before you joined, we once had a massive rave and Lucy totally swiped Caesar's drink and was licking around the rim of the gla-.”
“OH, MY GOD! YOU REMEMBER THA-. I-I-I MEAN, THAT'S INSANE! I'd n-never lower myself to such a level.” She still can't believe she did that, but she was very, very drunk, and very, very, very horny. If she remembers correctly, the dance she shared with Caesar later that night got quite romantic too… What she'd do to go back to that moment, even for a second… Maybe that was when she should've confessed to her? Right there, under the moonlight… hand in hand…
“See, she's totally daydreaming about her! Watch, she's gonna sigh and then mutter, ‘Caes-’.”
“Caesar…” Like clockwork.
Stunned beyond belief, Pulchra mouthed, ‘What?!’, only to be met with a frantic nod up and down. Although Burnice was having the time of her life, Pulchra, in her own weird, empathetic way, felt… sorry… She knew how it felt to hopelessly watch something slip through your fingers, and, one day, without warning, vanish forever… She might not have known Lucy, or the rest of the gang for that long in comparison, but that didn't make their connection any less meaningful. She was going to prove to Lucy, the one who trusted her least, that she cared, and that this ‘traitor-to-be’ could be trusted. “Hey, my lady.”
“What?! Got another tall tale of how I literally fell head over heels for Caesar and broke my nose, or, how about a time I was over her place and went through her underwear drawer?! Wouldn't that be hilarious?! …I-I didn't actually do that, by the way…” The truth, but now everyone suspected her of being the gang's biggest pervert. “Just go and get me that drink, Burnice… I feel like I've asked you half a dozen times now…” Lucy groaned into her palms.
“You got it!” She bolted up from her seat and leapt over Pulchra, making a mad dash for the abandoned counter. “One nitro-fuel special for Caesar's biggest fan coming right up!”
“I've never smelt anything of the sort in my liiiiife…” That did it. They might've finally broken her. She didn't have the strength to fight, nor the power to yell, just to groan… into her hands… about not smelling Caesar's underwear… on a Friday night…
“Lucy, can I talk to you about something? I'm being serious now, I promise.” She said she promised last time, but what could one more burn at this point?
“Sure…” Lucy's hands ran down her face and slammed down on the table with more force than anticipated, shooting Pulchra an exhausted look. “What is it?”
“Look, we all know how you really feel about the boss, and, while it can be entertaining, it's obviously eating you alive.” The mask that felt like a second layer of skin was suddenly set on the table in front of Lucy, Pulchra signalling with her pointer at the lady's own. “You wear that mask often? I've never seen you in it before.”
“Oh, this?” Between her fingers, Lucy held the bright red boar mask up to her face, contemplating it for a second before looking back at Pulchra's own. “This is an accessory, not a practicality. I need everyone to know at a glance that they're dealing with the boar thiren overseer, and my boars need to know who's in charge. I don't wear it often… or at all, honestly…”
“What if you wore it all the time?” Pulchra gently slid her mask over to Lucy in offering, giving the blonde a look of pure honesty. “What if it felt unnatural to have it off? How do you think you'd feel?” Her nails clinked against the metal rim of her mask again, echoing throughout the saloon. “Go on, put it on.”
Slowly equipping the mask onto her own face, Lucy's shallow breaths rang hollow through the cramped space her nose was trapped within. A strange, almost claustrophobic sensation overtook her senses when she held her hands up to her face. This sensation was alien, but oh so familiar. It wasn't a physical sensation, but emotional…
“How do you feel?” Pulchra soft gaze and voice asked.
“Like I'm back home…”
“Oh?” Pulchra pushed her drink over to Lucy, almost as a pre-emptive painkiller in case the situation called for it. “Hard life growing up too, huh?”
“Like you wouldn't believe…” She wanted to take the mask off, to be rid of the agonizing nostalgia she was willingly subjecting herself to, but, oddly enough, with the mask adorning her face, it didn't feel so impossible. “Do you want the short version, or the long version?” Her shaky voice reverberated behind the metal.
“I can tell when someone's suppressing a lot of pain. Let's go with the short version.” Her nails flicked up at her own chin as to signal Lucy to sip her drink from underneath if she wanted to.
The short one nodded, taking a long, sharp exhale out from her mouth after downing a quarter of the glass in one go. “Alright then. I guess I'll start with a question. What do you think it would feel like to have your life lived for you on someone else's behalf? What if most of your life was never yours to begin with? Are you even you?”
The thiren said nothing, only resting her right elbow against the table and ever so slightly tilting her head.
“In my opinion, it's a no. No, I don't think being a puppet for most of your life, only to suddenly decide you hate the strings that bind you makes you any more human than a stupid tumbleweed.”
“Why’d you run?” Pulchra asked, her gaze silently signalling to the drink in front of Lucy.
After another gulp, she sighed once more, this time almost trembling in her throat. “Why didn't I run would be more appropriate.” Lucy laughed, forcefully, but still a laugh. “The reason I ran is simple. I’d had enough. I told my family that I didn't want to inherit the Montefio legacy, and instead, I wanted to become a Hollow Investigator. And for the crime of wanting just a sliver of autonomy, of wanting to exist… they isolated me… Isolation and abuse, that's what my life was like before I ran.”
“What kind of abuse?” She knew she was playing with fire, nor was it her place to inquire, but if Lucy could open up to her, maybe she could open up to the one who really needed to hear it.
“Don't worry, nothing physical. They wouldn't dare send their ‘pride and joy’ to Celestia with a bruise around her eye, or her arm. No, just verbal abuse… Lots and lots of verbal abuse… Which, I guess I'm thankful for? I'm thankful for only having my tiny, fragile spririt crushed into a million pieces, I guess?! Thank you for that! More yelling at me for being angered by the concept of having a husband chosen for me, or the fact I very clearly don’t want a husband in the first place please! And I guess I'm supposed to say thank you for that too?! Because, hey, at least I wasn't beaten, right?”
Her claws rhythmically clicked against her glass, silently staring at Lucy. “It's easier with the mask, isn't it? Spilling everything like this.”
“I…” She was right. Pulchra wasn't a stranger, but confessing all of this to her of all people was unfathomable a dozen minutes ago… And, just like that, it'd all come crashing down. “I'm not sure I like this…” Her breath hitched in her throat as she struggled to take the seal that bound her mouth. Having this ugly sensation of regret, doubt and self loathing so easily filtered through the mask made her skin crawl and palms sweat. She wanted it off, now. Lucy tugged and pulled at the mask until it finally came loose and bounced off the table, a loud clang echoing throughout the restaurant. “S-Sorry… I-I'm not sure why I…”
“Don't sweat it. I would've done the same if I were you.” Leaning over the table, Pulchra pulled her drink back over to her and began to blep her tongue into the bubbling, orange liquid.
“And I would've done the same too, whatever we're talking about!” Three drinks filled to the brim with nitro-fuel clinked down against the table in front of them, each one for each member. “So, what's the verdict?! What're we yelling about?” Burnice asked with the curiosity of that equal to a puppy who'd just seen its reflection.
“We're yelling about how Lucy needs to tell the boss how she really feels.” Pulchra says, still blepping her drink. “If not, it'll follow her forever.”
“I-I don't think I can ever do that, you two… Y-You don't understand, I…” Before she could stammer any longer, Burnice set a hand of pure reassurance on her shoulder, smiling at her before she spoke.
“I’m here with advice, Lucy. Look, here's how you do it.” The pyromaniac turned to Pulchra and, with zero hesitation on her end and a sudden jump from the other, pressed her lips against the thirens and gently held the embrace until they mutually let go, her Kitty turning with a face flushed with embarrassment. “Simple! That's all you gotta do!”
“This is grotesque. And right in front of my drink too?!”
Burnice asked with her head tilted like a confused puppy. “Does your drink fear lesbians?”
“I DON'T KNOW?!” Lucy bellowed across the table with her fist clenched, taking a deep breath in a desperate attempt to calm herself. “Look, Burnice, I'm not just going to force myself onto her, ok? That's just… No, I don't need to explain why that's awful.”
“Force? Nobody said anything about forcing it. I was trying to show you the technique you'd use when you kiss her!” She said, shaking head as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“I've kissed other girls before, Burnice. I'm not a kissless virgin, or a virgin at all for that matter.” Lucy sighed, taking a quick swig of her drink.
“You may not be, but Caesar is!” The flame-brain exclaimed.
“Yeah, well, I know how to take it slow with a first timer. What I need help with is actually getting the fucking words out to begin with. I'm completely lost on how I'd even begin.”
“Call her.” Pulchra said, blunter than her bat.
“C-Call who? Caesar? No way! No fucking way!” Not after the massive fight they'd had earlier! She'd probably be up for another argument than to get into Lucy's pathetic, mushy feelings she'd been bottling up for years and years. “Why in the hell would I call her?! We just finished fighting not even two hours ago!”
“We can see you're a little tipsy, and you spilled all of that to me earlier. If you can just do that again, but without the mask, you'll finally be free.” Free… So, if she wanted true freedom, the thing she craved above all else, she'd just have to confess?
“And now the hell am I supposed to do that, huh? Should I write a script, or perhaps just wing it?!”
“You're being sarcastic, but winging it is how Burnice asked me out.” Pulchra set her arms out and presented her girlfriend like a gameshow host showing off the ultimate prize, smiling back at Lucy. “If it worked on me, then think about how much easier it would be for it to work on Caesar of all people. You two have known each other longer, and already argue like an old married couple. Besides, If she says no, Caesar isn't the type to rub it in your face, nor would she laugh at you.”
“Argh! I hate that you're making sense! …Fine, I'll call her, but no promises! If I say nothing, that's not my problem.” Alright… Just call Caesar without flying into a fit of rage, or throwing up… Simple… “Alright, here goes…”
Ring Ring… Ring Ring.. Ring R-
“Y-Yo, Lucy! You kinda caught me at a bad time. I'm sorta in the middle of something.” From what Lucy could make out in the background, Caesar, to nobody's surprise, was watching a romance film, but, strangely enough, the kissing from the film was rather loud, AND WAS THAT A MOAN?! “W-Whoa! Uhh… T-That was just a d-death scream! W-Watching a h-horror movie, y’know, ‘cus it's late and stuff…”
“Caesar, turn the filth off and listen to me for a second.” Lucy barely held back the laugh in her throat as she spoke, glancing up at her two giggling companions opposite her. “Me, Pulchra and Burnice are all at Cheesetopia and… Ugh, I'll just come out and say it… I… I-I want to see you…” Just saying the words felt like venom on her tongue, never mind how much she sounded like a cliché, needy girlfriend, straight from one of Caesar's manga's. “We're having drinks, if that'll tempt you to take your hands out your pants and come over here.”
“I-It ain't... t-that stuff, Luce. Look, I'll video call you to prove it.” The moment she requested one, Lucy denied it. “It's not anything weird!”
“If you're done trying to rope me into watch-partying whatever depravity you're into, I'd suggest you hurry up and get over here. You don't want to be the last one drunk, do you, Caesar~?” Her teasing voice accidentally purred down the phone.
“I always feel so warm and fuzzy when you talk to me like that! …Not sure why though… A-Anyway, I'll be right over there! Gimme a second, you three!”
Click
“There, done.”
“Sooo…” The orange furred thiren droned. “When's the boss gonna show up?”
“Look out the window, Pulchra, she lives right across the road.” The princess pointed towards the house opposite the restaurant to see, with a heavy sigh, Caesar, jogging over while maniacally waving her arms like a madwoman. “There she is… Why did it agree to this again?”
“To confess your lovey dovey feelings, of course!” Burnice damn near yelled, only quieting down when Lucy shot over the table and slapped her hand over her mouth.
“S-SHHHH! She's walking in now!” Just how awkward was this going to be? Both of them had neglected to bring up their three hour argument over the phone, either out of embarrassment, or, in Caesar's case, probably a lack of shits given.
“Yo! What's up guys!” Caesar, the Overlord of the Outer Ring and resident dumbass called out, arms wide in greeting with a humongous, beaming smile etched across her lips. Without even asking, the green haired girl slipped into the space beside Lucy and slung her arms around the blonde with her right leg crossed over her lap, pulling her close into her warmth like a drunkard. “So, what's up with the late night drinkin’? And, yo, why was I invited so late?!”
The smaller woman curled her clenched fists into her lap and nervously stared down to the ground, her blushing, bright red face on full display despite her best efforts of concealment. “Y-You aren't a ‘yo’ person, Caesar! Quit saying that!” She growled to the ground.
“Awww, maaan! I hoped nobody would notice! …Alright, whatever, I'll stop. If it's what my lady asks of me, then I shall oblige.” The larger woman teased with a weak attempt at a curtsy. It's not like she really could with one arm around her advisor and a leg over her own anyway. “Anyway, why's everyone so quiet?! Fix me up a drink, Burnice!”
Pulchra slides her spare glass, full to the brim, over to her superior, snapping her fingers to get her attention. “Take mine, boss. I'm still working through my first glass.”
“Thank you, Pulchra! Reliable as ever!” The mere mention of a compliment to her Kitty has Burnice frantically nodding up and down in agreement, patting Pulchra on the back after a job well done.
“That's our Pulchra! So reliable! So agile! So smart! So pretty! So fluffy! So-.” A lone, slender furry finger sets itself directly over the pyromaniac's lips, the thiren shooting her a look which could be best described as, ‘Alright, cut it out!’
“Burnice.” Pulchra said straight into her eyes.
“Yep!”
“Shush.”
“Ok.” She whispered back with a gentle nod.
“Ahahahaha!” The Overlord's laugh roared out within the empty saloon, echoing throughout the entirety of Blazewood. “Man, they're so much fun to watch, aren't they, Lucy?! Ahahah!” She was really putting the squeeze on her too. Her single, right arm, tightening around her entire upper body as she lost herself to laughter.
“Not as fun to watch as you two!” Burnice exclaimed after downing an unhealthy amount of liquor in one gulp. “I saw that huge fight you pair were having earlier! You were fightin’ and fuckin’! I watched for a good five minutes before me and Kitty had to go! It was great!” Fightin’ and… fuckin’?!
Lucy slammed her fist down on the table and shot a look of daggers over at Burnice, growling at her. “There was NO intercourse!”
“Inter-Knot? Hey, what're you guys talking about? I don't follow…” Caesar's confused gaze shifted back and forth from the thiren to the fuel lover, raising her right brow at their sly smiles.
“None at all?! I don't believe you!” Burnice heartily laughed to herself as she slammed her drink down on the table, leaning her left elbow against Pulchra. “You two went at it for three whole hours and nothing happened?! Sorry, but you two have way too much tension for me to believe that!”
“Ohhhhh! Yeah, we were just hanging out for a good few hours, even if it got kinda tense at times. Ain't that right, Lucy?” Caesar nudged, forcing a rather pathetic whimper from her advisor's mouth.
“Hanging out… Hanging… out…” The blondes blood boiled hotter than a thousand suns, searing whatever tiny fraction of her patience remained into ash. “WE WERE ARGUING FOR THREE HOURS! THAT IS NOT A CASUAL HANGOUT, YOU STUPID BOAR!” Lucy panted, and panted, and panted, until, finally, she turned her flustered gaze up at Caesar to see… her smiling?
“Cute~.” The larger woman purred, pulling her closer into her embrace and downing another round of nitro-fuel. “Super cute~.”
Lucy's body tried to curl up to make herself even smaller, but, almost as if reflex over took her for a second, she leaned fully into the tender warmth of her higher-ups hold, resting her head against her chest. “Whatever…” Being held this close to Caesar was something she only experienced when they were either both extremely drunk, or when Caesar’s romantic ignorance regarding the same sex would reveal itself. Well, she wouldn't be the one to complain. “Name-call me as much as you want, I'm too tired to care right now…”
“Lucy, you're being really cute and all, but you're kinda crushing my tits right now.” She giggled, looking back up at Burnice who was recording them with zero subtly.
“Deserved.” Lucy mumbled, as blunt as ever.
After stashing her phone away, Burnice double tapped both her hands on the table to signal everyone's attention to her. “Caesar, why did you annoy her all day?” Boredom? Anger? Hate? …Love? Burnice was praying on a star for it to be the latter!
“Guess it's ‘cus I like her, y’know. She annoys me, and I annoy her back. It's kinda been our way of talkin’ to each other for… Well, forever!” Caesar nuzzles her nose into Lucy's luscious, golden locks, causing the pair across the table to knowingly shoot the other a smile. “And I wouldn't have it any other way.”
“I suppose I wouldn't either…” The smaller woman mumbled straight into Caesar's breasts.
“L-Lucy…” Pulchra droned, barely able to suppress a full on laughing fit. “You gonna get outta there, or what?”
“Nope… I'm in heaven…”
“Huh? I thought we were in Cheesetopia?” Caesar said, scanning the room with a little too much honesty.
“I'm just saying, if she drools, I warned you.” The mercenary softly chuckles to herself, taking another sip from her half empty glass. “So, boss, ‘there anything else you wanna tell Lucy?”
“Uhhh… Yeah!” Pulling the blonde from out of her breasts, Caesar looked Lucy dead in her weary, still stunned eyes and smiled. “You wanna hangout again tomorrow?”
“A-And by ‘hangout’, you mean ruthlessly annoy me for two to three hours straight?” Here comes the stockholm syndrome… “...Ugh… I-I suppose it wasn't the worst time I've had hanging out with someone… S-Sure…”
Burnice nearly leapt out of her seat with joy, flinging both arms up in the air and catching a surprising amount of air time before returning to solid ground. “YES! WE DID IT, KITTY! IT'S A DATE!” And to celebrate their joint victory, Burnice pecked Pulchra on the cheek like a woodpecker until the thiren turned and returned her kiss in full… while Caesar just watched… in sheer, unbridled confusion.
She covered the side of her mouth and leant down to Lucy's level, whispering into her ear. “Lucy, call me crazy, but I'm starting to think Burnice has a thing for Pulchra…”
“We can still hear you, boss.”
“I’m gonna talk a little quieter because I think they can hear me. Lucy, I think Burnice has a thing for Pulchr-.”
“Of course she does, stupid!” Straight down the boar's ear… “Look! Look with your eyes! They're literally making out as we speak!”
“H-Hey, I was just askin’ because… B-Because this is all kinda new to me, s-so I was just wonderin’…” She muttered.
“Wondering what?” Lucy softly said.
“I…” Millions of questions and confusions ran through the jumbled mess she called her thoughts. Pulchra and Burnside were… a thing? Not only were they in love, but it was so obvious!
“L-Luce, I…” She stammered as her face burned hotter and hotter. Lucy, her arch nemesis and fated rival was… held in her arm, peacefully cuddled up against her… kinda like a couple… Is this the feeling she never understood? Is this why her heart felt so fuzzy when she’d see her for the first time everyday? Is this why her breath would hitch when she'd wear a beautiful new dress? Is this why she loved to annoy her so? Was it all just to spend as much time with her as possible, or to take up all of her attention? Looking down at her, Caesar felt… warmth. True, loving warmth… She guesses that's been the word she's been looking for all this time to describe her feelings… Love. “L-Lucy, I think I g-get it, y’know…?”
“Get what?” Her gentle gaze looked up at the one she loved the most.
“T-This whole g-girl liking thing… b-because… I'm… also into… um, g-girls… I think…” Her heart raced and her throat closed up under the sudden influx of alien emotions. Was she seriously about to say what's on her mind?! No… No, she couldn't! There's no way she… But… Looking at Lucy like this… It was all too much…
“Caesar…? W-What are you trying to say?”
“I'm saying that… t-that I think I'm in l-... love with you…”
Silence. No bickering from the blondes over the table. No jig from the jukebox. No howling from a motorbike's engine. No whistling from a faint breeze through Blazewood. Only the gentle sparking of the flickering lights above them… Lucy stared, eyes wide with shock and awe. This was it, the moment she'd dreamed of… All she had to say was… “I love you too, Caesar…”
Slowly, with the radiant sunrise and blazing sunset of their eyes locked, Lucy hesitantly inched closer to Caesar's face, her eyes gently shutting as their lips met the others in a quiet kiss under the midnight desert. The kiss didn't last long, but once they finally pulled away, a lone tear ran down Lucy's cheek and wept onto the prosthetic thumb under her eye. “That was my first kiss…” Caesar said softly into Lucy's trembling lips. “I'm so happy it was with you… I'll never forget this… Never…”
A pair of slender arms wrapped around the fighter's body as Lucy gently wept into her chest, a never-ending river of happy tears flowing down her cheek. “C-Caesar… I've been in love with you from the second I saw y-you… I love you so much it hurts…”
She set her prosthetic on top of her hair and slowly ran her metal digits through her radiant locks with a smile. “Your hair is so beautiful, Lucy.” Her right hand’s pointer and thumb cusp her chin in-between her fingers as she gently cranes her head up to meet hers, slowly kissing her on the lips before making her way up to her blushing cheek and to her forehead. “You're perfect in every way, Lucy. Fuck, you're gorgeous.”
“N-Not as g-gorgeous as y-you, boar…” The short one muttered, her exhausted smile refusing to leave her face for even a second.
“Whoa! Was that a compliment from Lady Lucy herself?! And to me of all people?!”
“Oh, s-shush! D-Don't get used to it!” The pair laughed to themselves in a state that could only be described with a one word… Bliss. “I-I’m not as good at complimenting as y-you are anyway…”
“Yeah, you'll probably just buy me some super expensive gift and insist it's a business expense, won’t you?”
“Gah! Y-You! I… N-No! I would n-never do such a th-...” After one long, drawn out huff that sounded more like a snarl than anything, Lucy looked back up at her. “F-Fine! It looks like you've finally gotten it through that thick skull of yours what I've been trying to tell you for what feels like an eternity!”
“Hey, but that works perfectly, right? I'll say nice things to make you feel good, and you buy me all the expensive crap I want! Hah! This is awesome! I shoulda confessed earlier! Man, the amount of manga I could've stocked up on would've been insane…”
“I-I’m not here to just buy you whatever you want, stupid! …B-But… We have a day off tomorrow… We could go on that date and pick up some of that silly manga of yours…?” She craved one thing in this moment, just a single, magical word and she'd be golden…
“Oh, hell yeah!” Well, she was hoping to hear a ‘yes’, but ‘Oh, hell yeah!’ works too, she guessed. “The more time I get to spend with my rival, the better! Oh, wait, should I call you my girlfriend now?”
“If you'd like.” Lucy took Caesar's hand into her own and moved into a small bow, kissing the top of her hand like a true, dignified lady. “Miss King.”
“L-Lady Lucy.” She stammered as she bowed back, taking her princess hand into hers and giving it a nibbly kiss. “How was that? Noble, right?”
“You basically bit me, but I can't be too mad at a boar who was never taught manners.” She scoffed. “It was acceptable. Take it or leave it.”
“I-I'll get better at it, I promise! I'll do it for you, Lucy!”
“Ugh! You don't need to change anything about yourself for me, silly. Besides, you're already perfect, just the way you are.” She did it! A genuine compliment, and to Caesar of all people! Even the boar was shocked!
“Another?! Lucy, you're killin’ it!”
“AH! THEY'RE SO CUTE! PULCHRA, ARE YOU SEEING THIS?!” They're still here?!
“W-Whoa! Didn't realise you two were still here! Ahaha!” Caesar's chuckle betrayed just how flustered she really was, given the fact she just gave her closest companions a front row seat to her first kiss and all. “Umm, I should probably get some sleep. See you guys tomorrow!” After she stood, Lucy, gripping onto her jacket sleeve, looked up at her with a mean grimace.
“Without me?!”
“O-Oh, w-well… It's just that I'm going to sleep, Luce… U-Unless you wanna s-stay the night with me…?” Like a romantic cliché, Caesar pressed her pointer fingers together with her usual, blushing expression glowing brighter with every passing second. “A-And I only have o-one bed, s-so…”
“Is that going to be a problem?” Pulchra and Burnice looked at each other in sheer disbelief. No way their little make-out session led to THIS?!
“A p-problem? N-No way! We can s-share… Ahahaha…” Lucy stood and slipped her hand into the hers and walked in front of her, leading her back across town before suddenly stopping at Caesar's door.
“Hey, Pulchra, what're they saying? Use your super senses and listen!” Burnice looked through her makeshift binoculars made from her hands and squinted, even though they'd barely walked away from them.
“They're just staring at each other right now. Look, she's holding her cheek and-.” From the comfort of the diner, the pair witnessed Lucy, standing as tall as she could, hold Caesar's cheeks and press her lips against hers before leading her inside, smiling back at the duo one last time. “Damn… They must really love each other, huh?”
“Not as much as I love you, Kitty!” Burnice beamed.
“Alright, no need to make it a competition. I, umm… I love you too, Burnice…”
“YAY! DRINKS ON ME!”
In the dead silence of Blazewood, two couples chatted the night away. One in the comfort of their own home, and the other in the dim quiet of a restaurant.
Love might've terrified them both at some point, but, with a gentle push, a single spark, they were able to ignite something new, something dear to their very beings.
The Overlord and her Advisor, together at last, and all it took was… watching their friends make-out?
Huh…
Not the strangest thing that's happened to them, but it's something alright.