Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Don't be stupid, it wouldn't work. You're stuck as a servant your entire life, and I'm the rotten prince. What on earth made you think this had any chance of working?”

Leona had known he was throwing away one of the only good things in his life as Jamil slowly processed his words. His face moved from one emotion to another: shock, disbelief, hurt, disappointment, anger.

“Fuck you.” 

Jamil glared at him through hot tears, struggling for words.

“Fuck you,” he settled on again before he walked off, never to be seen again.

Or so Leona had thought. Obviously life couldn't stop throwing shit at him, evidenced by the dread he was feeling in his stomach as an older familiar face walked into the Sunset Savanna's palace hall. Cold grey eyes barely gave him the time of day before settling back into their dull, uninterested stare at anything but him.

—

“Hey,” Leona said the instant they were alone; Kalim was being held hostage by Falena in a private meeting regarding a possible alliance, so Jamil had to stay outside with him.

“Your Highness,” Jamil replied evenly, bowing to him.

For the first time all evening Leona was grateful that Jamil was avoiding eye contact at all costs. He swallowed down the hurt before Jamil could have a chance to see it; the formal servant act cut so much deeper than any form of anger would have.

So they were going to play it like this, huh? 

“Leona's fine. I'm sure you recall,” he drawled. “Heard you scream it enough.”

Finally, that got a reaction.

When Jamil looked up Leona realised two things: 1. Jamil wasn’t angry, he was livid. 2. Leona was not over him in the slightest. A nauseating feeling washed over him as he stared back into those familiar eyes swirling with rage.

Unlike his eyes, Jamil’s voice seemed to be struggling to express his fury. His lips were pressed into a thin line, and Leona really wished he hadn't missed that as much as he did.

Jamil's eyes flickered with something else before he forced them back to his usual dull stare. 

“Is that so?” Jamil finally replied. “Then I hope you remember it well, because you will never hear it again.”

—

“Leona!”

Leona rolled over on his bed to find Jamil at the edge of it, impressively quiet as usual even with all those ridiculous bells in his hair, and once again Leona was left to wonder whether there was more to the job description than making sure the Asim heir didn't jump out of a window.

“That's m‘name. Glad you still remember it after all that punch,” Leona grinned, recalling fondly how they had celebrated Silver's birthday. Surviving two world-ending threats together and a lot of booze had resulted in quite the relationship send off.

“Ha ha,” Jamil deadpanned, though the faint blush dusting his cheeks betrayed the fact that he definitely remembered the spicier parts of last night. 

“So what're you here for? Don't tell me you're here to bury the evidence that you've considered eloping to the better dorm,” Leona grinned. 

“You wish,” Jamil scoffed, forgetting his embarrassment instantly. “If anything, it would be an alliance more than anything.”

Leona's eyes widened at the implication, “you…?”

Jamil nodded, a proud smirk on his face. This was clearly what he was here for. “Housewarden of Scarabia, yes. The headmaster was impressed with my performance during the crisis, and Kalim–” he paused briefly. “We've come to an understanding.”

Well, how about that. An unexpected rush of pride swelled up in Leona as he watched Jamil's confident air, like day and night from their first meeting. Jamil was looking at him expectantly, despite his newfound confidence, it seemed he still cared about what Leona thought of him.

He whistled, “well, well, well, Housewarden Jamil Viper. Looks like we have something to celebrate. Thank your Vice Housewarden for me.”

“I'll be sure to send him a memo, but for now I have to attend a certain meeting with the Housewarden of Savanaclaw.”

—

“How was the meeting?” Jamil asked dully as Kalim returned from his private meet-up with the new King of Sunset Savanna. 

As the Asim heir, Kalim had been considered such an important guest they were assigned to the palace’s royal quarters for the remainder of their stay. Which was wonderful, of course. Jamil was ecstatic at the prospect of being only a few doors away from Prince Leona's personal room. Just his luck.

“Great! King Falena is so nice!” Kalim piped up cheerfully.

“That's great, Kalim, but I was talking about the negotiations.”

“Oh, hehe,” Kalim scratched his head sheepishly. “They were fine, I think. They're interested in a trade deal between families, uh…something about silks, maybe?”

“Ask for a stenographer next time if you can't remember anything important,” Jamil said nonchalantly. He had long since given up on caring about Kalim bringing ruin to his own family, just like how they hadn't cared about ruining him. Let them go bankrupt for all he cared.

“Good idea!!” Kalim exclaimed excitedly, clapping his hands. “What would I do without you, Jamil?”

“Die, probably,” Jamil muttered as he stared out of the window absentmindedly, picking at a scab on his thumb. Surprisingly high up, his mind provided idly. He wished that fact did something for him as he looked down to see just how high.

“Did something happen?” Kalim asked quietly. “You're more… uh… more Jamil than usual.”

“Nothing that's not easily fixed with expensive royal Sunset Savanna liquor.”

—

“You should probably cut back on that, I've been told it's spiked.”

Leona turned around and smiled when his eyes landed on Jamil. "Already back to your usual naggin’? We just survived a calamity, surely you can allow yourself to let loose a bit.”

Jamil huffed. He wasn't nagging. He was about to retort, but then he stopped himself. Who was he being a killjoy for, anyway? They were both adults, Leona especially so. He eyed the faint alcohol blush on Leona's cheeks and smiled, it looked like the damage was done anyway.

Fuck it.

“Who said anything about nagging? I just didn't want you to drink it all by yourself,” He said casually, shooting Leona a cheeky smile.

Leona gaped at him for a second before barking out a laugh, “you're just full of surprises, aren't you? Sure, have at it.” He stepped aside from the punchbowl, leaning on the table as he watched Jamil fill his cup.

Jamil brought the cup to his mouth, the alcohol hit his nose first. He cringed, whoever spiked the punch had no concept of a balanced flavour profile, and probably just dunked a whole bottle of vodka in. 

“Don't feel like you gotta drink that just to fit in with the grown-ups, you'll just embarrass yourself,” Leona snickered as he watched Jamil take forever to take a sip.

Giving Leona a deadpan stare, he knocked back the horrifically smelling punch. He kept his face neutral, but by the Seven it was the most disgusting mixture he had tasted, and he had tasted literal poison.

“Good boy,” Leona grinned. “Awful isn't it? I suspect it was Trappola.”

“Ace? He can't even drink yet…” Jamil said, knowing full well that Ace would absolutely try to ‘overachieve’ spiking the punch to be cool, and fail miserably. “...and why did you goad me into drinking it if you knew it was bad?”

Leona shrugged, “I didn't do any of the sort. You demanded it, if you recall. I just forgot to warn you.”

Jamil hummed, “I suppose.”

They settled into an awkward silence after. Jamil's mind wandered to their battle against Malleus a few weeks ago, how Leona had praised him for ordering Kalim around. His dream, seeing himself for how Leona had seen him in S.T.Y.X..

He glanced at Leona, “Say, Leona?”

“Hm?” Leona looked up from his own cup of poison.

“What was your dream like?”

“...”

—

Familiar soft lips pressed against his neck. Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. Trailing down his chest, leaving a warm glow with each press. 

“I missed you,” those lips murmured against his skin. 

“I–”

“Leona!” Falena’s voice boomed behind Leona's bedroom door, jarring him out of his dream. 

Leona groaned miserably, burying his face into his pillow. Just two more weeks, just two more weeks, just–

“Brother, are you awake yet?” Falena continued loudly, clearly not at all concerned about the answer. “C'mon, the guests will only be here for two weeks.”

“Thanks for the info, now I know how long I need to lock my door for. Go away,” Leona grumbled from under his pillow.

As expected, he was immediately met with a cry of agony from his door– and its hinges– as the stupid brute forced it open.

“Nonsense! They're your old schoolmates, surely a little reunion will do you good? When was the last time you saw any besides that hyena you always hang out with?”

Leona ignored him, pulling his covers even further over his head.

There was no follow up. An eerie silence followed, besides Falena’s audibly awkward shuffling. Something was up.

“Quit pussyfootin’ around, and just tell me why you’re here.” 

“Asim worries about his servant,” Falena said with a deep authoritative voice; one he reserved for the– exceedingly– rare occasions he was serious about something. 

Leona’s stomach dropped. Kalim was worried? 

“What’s wrong with him?” Leona said, finally shoving off his covers.

He hated the way Falena smiled with relief. He also hated how easily he’d fallen for his trap; tricked into giving away his hand. His heart, his mind supplemented unhelpfully.

“How’s that my problem?” Leona spat out. “Surely he knows how to take care of his own servants?”

Falena sighed, with that obnoxious, soft look on his face he got when he was deluding himself into thinking he was a caring big brother.

“Asim mentioned that you and the servant– Jamil?– dated,” Falena said, “I thought maybe you could drop by and check in on him.”

Leona looked at his brother incredulously, pieces falling into place.

“Well stop doing that,” Leona said fiercely as he got up, reaching down for the shirt he had thrown on the floor the day before.

“Doing what, exactly?” Falena tilted his head in confusion, watching Leona get dressed.

“Thinking. Not your strong suit,” Leona said, opening his now broken door. He leveled Falena a glare, “nor is playing matchmaker.”

“I'm going out. Fix the door.”

The door creaked sadly as Leona stalked through, fuming.

—

A soft creak of his wooden floor was the only warning Leona got before he was assaulted by ice cold hands underneath his blankets.

He would've jolted away, had those same hands not immediately started to entangle themselves around his chest. A soft chuckle against his shoulder blade melted all tension out of him.

“...Who taught you to be this evil?” Leona grumbled.

“You did,” Jamil snickered into his shoulder, his hands diving into his sides in search of more heat. The bastard. “Something about knowing how to use others to your advantage. It just so happens that you're a furnace, and my hands are so very very cold.”

“I don't think this is what I meant,” Leona drawled, scooting away from the pair of icicles assaulting his stomach. He turned around to face his assailant.

Jamil was smirking at him with a gleeful glint in his eyes. One he'd openly had on his face more and more often lately, no longer holding back at all anymore. Especially ever since Malleus haunted everyone with his torture dream sequence.

“Too bad. It's what I took from it,” Jamil said playfully, inching closer to Leona.

“‘S that right?” Leona grinned back, a light feeling in his chest. Closing the distance for a soft kiss.

“Hmmh,” Jamil hummed into the kiss, rolling them over so he was on top.

“Let me thank you for your wise advice, Your Highness.”

—

“King Falena, Your Majesty,” Jamil said serenely with a deep bow. “You called for me?”

King Falena gave him a kind nod and a beaming smile.

“Jamil! I can call you Jamil, right? Welcome, welcome. I'm glad you could make it.”

He gestured for Jamil to come closer.

Jamil regarded him passively, not moving from his spot. He had met the king before, of course, but this was the first opportunity he'd had since arrival to observe the man up close. 

He studied Falena’s radiant smile, not dissimilar to the one he was forced to see every day, yet there was a clear difference. Unlike Kalim's nauseating sincerity, there was a calculated purpose behind Falena’s, one Jamil couldn't seem to figure out. It put Jamil on edge; what could the king of Sunset Savanna ever need from him?

Jamil swallowed, Falena couldn't possibly be more different from Leona, yet it seemed both brothers had a way of putting Jamil on edge.

“Asim talks a lot about you,” Falena continued, unperturbed by Jamil's refusal to obey his gesture. 

“He does that,” Jamil replied dryly, rolling his eyes. 

Of course. Of course the reason was Kalim. No doubt Kalim had wasted their entire trade meeting jabbering about him, and Falena called him here to either remove him as a distraction or to see if he was useful for exploiting Kalim.

Jamil wondered which of the two it would be.

Falena chuckled, “I can see why my brother is so taken with you. You've got the same charm.”

Jamil nearly choked on his spit. 

“Wh-”, he spluttered, his mind scrambling to recompose himself. 

He cleared his throat. “Not to be impolite, Your Majesty, but for what reason did you call me?” 

“I called you here to propose a deal,” Falena said evenly. His cheerful expression had fallen into a confident knowing smile, as if he had hit the jackpot.

There it was. So it was exploitation. Whatever, he didn't care about the Asim family being exploited. That was Kalim's problem; he was ‘learning the ropes of negotiation’, after all.

“I'd like for you to spend some time with my brother. A date, to be precise.”

—

“A date?”

“You heard me,” Leona drawled. He crossed his arms nonchalantly. “Surely, you're familiar with the concept.”

Jamil snorted, rolling his eyes. “Well I am, I just didn't realise you were.”

“Ouch, Viper,” Leona grinned. “You wound me, I'm very romantic. Ask Vil.”

“Yeah, bringing up your ex while asking me out is very romantic, my bad,” Jamil scoffed, a hint of true annoyance seeping through. Vil had always been a touchy subject ever since he had subtly implied that Leona had ‘downgraded’.

Leona had laughed his ass off when Jamil had vented to him, saying that if he got Vil to say something that petty, he certainly wasn't actually a downgrade. “Trust me, I know the guy. That's a compliment.”

“Sounds like you're not interested in this unromantic date, then. What a shame,” Leona said casually, unperturbed by Jamil's personal vendetta with his ex.

Jamil breathed through his nose. 

“I'm interested.”

“Cool. Pack some bags, we're going to Sunset Savanna,” Leona said. His tail swished behind him, betraying his excitement.

“W-woah, wait– Sunset Savanna?!” Jamil spluttered. “How– Why– Aren't we in the middle of a semester!?”

“Come now, where's your sense of adventure? How unromantic of you, Jamil,” Leona tsked playfully, before pacifying him. “Relax. It’s only for a weekend, I got a mirror. All you need to worry about is whether you're okay with leaving your dorm in the hands of your Vice Housewarden for a few days.”

—

“Leona!!!”

Leona opened one of his eyes, his headache growing immediately upon seeing Kalim running towards him.

“How'd you find me?” He grumbled when Kalim settled in front of him in his favourite napping spot; a small neglected gazebo far away from the main palace gardens, overgrown with vines and barely visible amidst the surrounding vegetation.

All this to say: Someone had told Kalim where to find him, and he had an inkling of who it may have been.

Kalim opened and closed his mouth like a clueless guppy as if he wasn't sure if telling Leona that piece of information was something he was supposed to share.

“Alright, alright, don't break your brain. I know it was Falena. Answer this then. Why are you here?”

Kalim's face lit up with determination and relief, confirming Leona's assumption. 

Leona nearly snorted. Seven help the Asims if this was the poker face they'd have to rely on during important trade deals. They'd be better off sending their servant; to this day Leona still couldn’t read Jamil fully on the best of days, and these were clearly not. The best of days, that is.

The thought rested heavy on his stomach, as thinking about Jamil tended to do. 

Thankfully Kalim was about as good at maintaining a poker face as he was reading them.

“Um… I need your help,” Kalim said bashfully. “...with Jamil.”

“Can't,” Leona drawled, closing his eye again.

“But you have to!” Kalim blurted out in a higher voice than usual. 

Leona ignored him. 

“...Only you can,” he continued in a soft voice, sounding defeated, resigned even. Lost. As if for the first time in his life Kalim al-Asim could not laugh his worries away.

With a deep and weary sigh, Leona opened his eyes.

“Explain.”

—

“Are you ever going to tell me where you're taking me?” Jamil sighed, practically climbing Leona as he was guided through Sunset Savanna’s foliage, not particularly happy about all the potential critters that could assault him at any moment.

“Eventually. Just be patient, we’re almost there,” Leona said in amusement. “Though if you wanted me to bridal-carry you to our date, all you had to do was ask, darlin’.”

“You’re such a dick, you know,” Jamil said, shooting him a withering scowl despite not moving away from Leona’s proximity whatsoever. 

Leona chuckled. “Well aware.”

“If this date is an elaborate way of taking revenge for telling Ruggie where you were the other day…,” Jamil huffed, clearly getting ready for his defence as to why it was okay he had brutally backstabbed Leona for Ruggie. 

“Relax. I ain’t here for revenge, even though you should feel bad about backstabbin’ me for that rat,” Leona rolled his eyes. 

Not that he expected to win that argument; he knew by now he had somehow drawn the shortest end of the stick in their ‘bros before hoes’ situation, because neither his ho nor his bro had his back. Ever.

“Maybe because not having your back is having your back, Leona,” Ruggie had said last time.

Shoving aside that train of thought, he pushed through a curtain of vines to reveal what he was here for; a beautiful open cave overgrown with a wide variety of flowers, and a small lake in the middle. Sun was peeking through from the ceiling to illuminate several broken down walls and structures that had once been built there.

He stepped aside for Jamil to walk in, “This is it. Careful, there might be snakes hidin’ around.”

“Really?” Jamil’s face lit up in excitement, and walked inside the cave eagerly to explore, his previous hesitance for nature completely forgotten.

Leona shook his head incredulously as he followed; he would never figure his guy out. How were deadly venomous snakes better than a few innocent bugs?

“Yeah, so be careful. I’ve got Ruggie on call in case of emergencies, but that doesn’t mean I would like to owe him.”

Jamil just nodded as he was taking in the cave, then he turned around to face Leona. “So why take me here?”

“What? I can’t take you to a romantic picnic place no one has ever seen?”

“Sure,” Jamil replied easily. “But you wouldn’t. Not without anything else you’d want to show me.”

“Is that so?” Leona snorted, ignoring the warm feeling spreading in his chest. 

“Well, since you seem awfully sure about knowing me, I guess I could show you something else I haven’t shown anyone before,” Leona admitted nervously. 

There was no going back now, no more plausible deniability. But as Jamil’s smile grew slowly, settling into real genuine affection; he realised they were both stepping into unfamiliar territory. 

“My childhood.”

—

“Are you enjoying my baby pictures?”

Jamil jumped up in the air from the sudden voice behind him. An all too familiar voice. He turned around from the giant family portrait on the wall to find the owner.

Leona was leaning against the center table, arms crossed, face unreadable.

“Maybe,” Jamil said, keeping his tone level. “You certainly looked a lot more innocent in them than you are now.”

The corners of Leona's mouth curled up. He leaned back on his hands nonchalantly. For a moment he didn't say anything, eyes roaming over Jamil before settling behind him on the painting, studying it.

The movement had caused Leona's bangs to fall into his face, covering his scarred eye, and Jamil tried to swallow down the weight of regret that settled in his stomach for his comment.

It seemed that no matter how hard he tried, no matter how much Leona had hurt him, he couldn't bring himself to return the favour. Not about this.

“Well,” Leona finally spoke up, looking at him with the same vulnerability Jamil had seen only once before; on the best and worst day of his life.

“You would know about that, wouldn't you?”

—

“You know. When you said you were showing me ‘your childhood’, I didn't think you'd show me a wall of ancient inscriptions of a dead language,” Jamil said in amusement. “Don't tell me this is your way of telling me you're a vampire who is secretly hundreds of years old. One who embarrassingly fell for a high-schooler and made that his whole personality.”

Leona barked out a laugh beside him, “didn't know you were the kind of guy to read those books.”

Jamil smirked and shot him a sidelong look, “I didn't think you were the kind of guy to be familiar enough with them to get the reference.”

“Touché,” Leona grinned back. "We may both be that kind of guy, huh?”

“Hmm,” Jamil hummed in acknowledgement, leaning against Leona's side as his eyes roamed around on the slab before him; a massive wall of what seemed to be a language Jamil had never seen before. 

“So?” He pressed. “Explain. What do these inscriptions tell me about your childhood?”

When no response followed, Jamil looked up at Leona, ready to goad him some more, but it died in his throat when he saw Leona's face. He frowned, Leona looked hesitant, as if he was regretting inviting Jamil here.

He lifted himself away from Leona and took a step away to give him some space, preparing for Leona to pull back as he usually did.

That apparently snapped Leona out of whatever inner conflict he was having.

Leona looked at him, and let out a sigh.

“It's a long story.”

“Well,” Jamil smiled wryly. “Kalim is taking care of Scarabia for the time being, so whether I like it or not, I have the time.”

Leona eased up, shoulders relaxing. He chuckled, “and I know that took so much courage out of you, so who am I to waste it?”

“Exactly,” Jamil said. “Don't make me regret that decision.”

The corners of Leona's lips curled up slightly, before they dropped back into his usual frown. Sighing again, he looked at the wall.

“I never fit in with my family,” he started, surprising Jamil. He held his breath; Leona never talked about his family, especially not in an honest way.

“Never saw eye to eye. Especially when I grew up old enough to understand my place in it. That I would never be anything but the rotten second prince. The spare.”

Leona tilted his head forward, hair falling into his face, shielding his expression from Jamil.

“One day, I couldn't take it. Things… happened, and I ran away. Found this place.”

“Things?”

Leona angled his face to Jamil, his hair framing his scar like it always did, but this time it felt intentional, like it had always been intentional. 

Jamil swallowed, giving a small nod in understanding. He motioned for Leona to continue.

“I found this place. Had no idea what it said, but I desperately needed a distraction. So I started translating it.”

Jamil looked at the inscription, “what does it say?”

“History of Sunset Savanna. Nothing that couldn't be found in textbooks.”

“Ah,” Jamil deflated a little. Maybe a small part of himself had thought Leona was sharing some never before seen ancient incantations that they hadn't even covered in their ancient incantation classes.

Leona chuckled, “yeah. It was kind of a bummer, but translating it was also the most fun I'd had in a long time. No family drama, no backhanded comments behind my back, being invisible next to the bright first prince. Had almost forgotten about it all for a few blissful hours. ‘S why it's my favourite class.”

Jamil's mind was all over the place trying to process all of what Leona was saying, and especially what he wasn't saying. The meaning behind the words; not entirely unlike figuring out an ancient language.

He closed the distance between them, and reached up, gently brushing the hair out of his face.

“I see,” Jamil said, getting on the tips of his toes to give him a soft kiss.

When he pulled back, Leona looked like a deer in headlights. Jamil couldn't help but smile at the sight.

“I see you, Leona. Like you saw me.”

—

Leona calmly studied Jamil. He had gone back to his servant façade, but Leona had seen that brief show of emotion. A brief flash of regret. 

So Jamil was still in there somewhere, behind the uncaring attitude. 

“You're not like me”, he had said years ago, but… the way Jamil had clearly given up; Leona realised those words were no longer true. 

I dragged you down with me. 

It was what he had been afraid of from the start. What he had wanted to prevent. 

Leona sighed. He guessed it was up to him to fix it, considering Kalim all but begged him– no, definitely begged him to.

“Alright,” he said finally, sliding off the table to close some distance to Jamil. “Let's not beat around the bush. We clearly got set up by team Sunshine, so why don't we do an exchange? You tell me what my brother offered you for this exclusive awkward meet up of the century, and I'll tell you all about how Kalim practically grovelled for me to fix you.”

He waited for Jamil to react, but his face stayed annoyingly neutral; the Jamil he knew would have at least shown some annoyance at Leona's usual lack of tact. His indifference was as concerning as it was painful.

“No?” Leona shrugged, ignoring the nagging voice in his head that it was his fault Jamil was like this. 

It wasn't. It wasn't. It couldn't be.

“Well I don't know what it is my brother promised you, but you can tell him you saw me. We talked, reconciled, or whatever else he wanted from you. I'll play along.”

He turned around to leave. He had a brother to find for this nightmare of a day.

“This wasn't your idea?” Jamil's voice suddenly rang behind him.

Leona turned around. Jamil was still standing at a distance, but his demeanour had subtly changed. Barely, but Leona could tell. 

“Why on earth would this be my idea?” Leona said incredulously, walking up to Jamil. “My idea was to hibernate in my room for the next two weeks.”

Jamil hesitated now, clearly reorganising his assumptions in real time. 

“I thought–” he said, before stopping himself, and Leona swore he caught a glimpse of disappointment in his face before he steeled himself again.

“Falena offered to buy me out. In exchange for… this,” Jamil waved between them.

Oh, he was going to kill Falena. Cheka was old enough.

“...I assume you took it?”

“Of course not,” Jamil scoffed, the audacity of that claim breaking through his mask. He crossed his arms. “I thought this was a pathetic attempt on your part to talk to me again. I may have lost everything, Your Highness, but I have some dignity left.”

“Screw dignity. Take it.”

Jamil's eyes widened in shock, before settling into a deep frown, which was– in some twisted way– a welcome sight.

“If you think even for a second that I would want to be indebted to you, or think you can own me–”

“Jamil. Stop,” Leona interrupted him, putting his hand on Jamil's shoulder. “I don't. That's not what I meant.”

Jamil was still glaring at him with smoldering fury, but he waited for Leona to elaborate.

“I don't know what my brother offered, but he wouldn't– my brother is an idiot, but he wouldn't make this offer lightly, Jamil. You would be free.”

“Free to be with you, you mean?”

“No, I'll talk to him. I'm sure I could offer something he'd find acceptable that wouldn't involve you. You wouldn't be indebted.”

Leona sighed, “Please. Take the offer. I will not be the reason you lose your chance at freedom again.”

Jamil's glare had been replaced by confusion, his eyes darting back and forth as he was trying to process what Leona was trying to say, until his mind caught up to his words.

“...Again?” he said suspiciously. “What do you mean ‘again’?”

“...It was my fault.”

—

“– and so he always took the blame for it, even though I was the mastermind,” Jamil said, looking way too smug for someone who had just confessed to getting his middle school friend in trouble for his shenanigans.

In exchange for Leona's childhood stories, Jamil had started to open up about his own. Leona learned that Jamil did in fact have someone he actually considered a friend; a tiger beastman called Rehan he hadn't spoken to since middle school because he wasn't a mage like Jamil.

“So you're saying you were always a deceitful little snake,” Leona goaded him. “He sounds like a sucker. I wouldn't have let you trick me into taking the blame for you.”

“Is that so?” Jamil grinned, giving him a look that told Leona he didn't buy that at all. “What a shame.”

“In any case,” Jamil continued, voice taking on a more sincere, fond note. “I didn't trick him. Rehan just knew he could get away with things I couldn't. I served the Asim heir, and any trouble I got into reflected badly on them and my family.”

Leona watched as Jamil's smile slowly melted off his face as he reminisced on his situation. A bad train of thought to linger on. So Leona wasn't going to let him.

“All in the past, yeah?” Leona reminded him. “Kalim is going to talk to his father, you're going to get out of there.”

Jamil gave him a soft smile. 

“Yeah. I am.”

A silence fell between them. Jamil’s eyes wandered across the murals idly as he was deep in thought, no doubt letting their conversation roll around in his mind. 

Leona watched as Jamil's eyes settled on a particular section on the wall, something about it pulling him out of his thoughts; he was reading it.

Surprised, Leona followed Jamil's gaze only to feel a sense of dread wash over him. 

Oh no.

Jamil let out a surprised laugh, and Leona knew it was too late to distract him from it.

“Oh, Leona…,” Jamil said, sounding deeply amused. “How cute.”

“Shaddup,” Leona groaned, ignoring the heat rising to his cheeks. “I was ten.”

Jamil walked up to the section Leona had completely forgotten about. Badly etched letters and markings stood out like a sore thumb next to the old ancient writing; an attempt by his 10-year-old self to replicate the inscriptions and add his own ‘history’ to it.

Leona sighed heavily as Jamil kept the wicked grin on his face, he was clearly thinking of how to use this as future blackmail material. It would work. Ruggie finding out would be disastrous to his ego.

“When I was ten, I used to terrorise the playground with a stick as the Sorcerer of the Sands,” Jamil offered instead as a peace offer. “I wrote his incantations into the sand in the hopes of summoning the Cave of Wonders. That's how I got into Ancient Incantations as my favourite subject.”

An unfamiliar warm feeling spread across Leona's chest. Imagining a timeline in which they could've known each other, translating stupid dead languages together. Having someone else who understood them.

He swallowed, “You asked me a few months ago what my dream was like.”

“Hmm?” Jamil said, sobering up at Leona's sudden serious tone.

“This is my dream,” Leona said, walking up to Jamil.

“This?” Jamil gave him a confused look, unsure where Leona was going with this.

“Sharing my interests, my thoughts, my home with someone who understands what it's like.”

“I don't–,” Jamil started, clearly lost in the conversation.

“Someone like me.”

Jamil's eyes widened. Leona knew he understood what he was referencing, what he had truly meant when he said those words months ago.

He took a deep breath, feeling nervous. This was what he had planned this weekend around.

“Jamil. When I graduate, would you like to come with me to Sunset Savanna? Do your internship here.”

Seconds ticked by excruciatingly slow as Jamil was processing his question. Seemingly speechless, Jamil opened and closed his mouth a few times until Leona couldn't take it anymore. 

“Just say no already,” he blurted out, immediately regretting it as the words left his mouth, but well… the bridge was burning already. “I know you want to.”

Jamil raised his eyebrows in shock before they settled into a scowl, and Leona knew it was over. At least they weren't at NRC, small comforts.

“...and you think you know me so well, don't you?” Jamil said venomously after a beat. There it was, Leona prepared himself.

“I think you may have forgotten, Leona Kingscholar, but I've said it before and I'll say it again,” Jamil continued, closing the distance between them. “I will never take orders from anyone ever again. So no, I don't think I will… say no.”

Uh… huh?

“I'm saying yes, idiot,” Jamil rolled his eyes, leaning up to kiss him briefly before rocking back on his heels, seemingly deeply enjoying himself while Leona was trying to process this turn of events. 

“Despite your incredible attempt at sabotaging it, I am accepting your offer.”

“Oh,” Leona muttered. “Great. That's great.”

“You could stand to be a little bit happier about it,” Jamil said, looking put off and a little worried.

Happy. He was happy, wasn't he? Jamil said yes. He said yes. Leona inhaled sharply, before finally cracking a smile, relieved beyond comprehension. 

Before Jamil could say anything else Leona wrapped his arms around Jamil's waist pulling him into a deep kiss.

“Mmm,” Jamil hummed into the kiss, pulling back to smile. “Like that, yes. Much better.”

“Could show you just how happy I am,” Leona smiled back before chasing Jamil's lips. Pulling him into another kiss. 

“Yeah?” Jamil panted after breaking away again. “How are you planning on doing that?”

“Hmm,” Leona hummed. Pushing Jamil back against the nearest stone structure. His hand drifted underneath Jamil's shirt. “Depends. How scared are you of potentially doing it in front of a venomous snake?”

Jamil shuddered, giving him a sultry smile. “Their eye-sight is bad, we'll be okay.”

Leona snorted. “Good to know.” 

With one fluid movement he grabbed Jamil around the waist to set him down on top of the nearest flat surface. Jamil groaned and pulled him down with him into another kiss.

“Leona–”

–You said your phone was broken, just forgot to charge it–

They both jumped at the sudden interruption. Leona groaned as he recognised the ringtone. Ruggie's ringtone. 

“Ruggie,” he grumbled as he rejected the call. “Ignore it.”

Jamil snickered, “I thought you told him about your plans?”

–You said your phone–

The phone rang again, and worry settled into his gut. Jamil was right, he had told him. Reluctantly, he picked up.

“This better be important,” he growled. 

“Leona!” Ruggie's frantic voice rang through his phone immediately upon picking up. “It's Kalim. Kalim is–”

—

“If I hadn't taken you off-campus. If I hadn't distracted you. If we hadn't been dating…” Leona swallowed. “You were on your way out of there, and I ruined it.”

The only sound that followed was the clock ticking behind Jamil, as if it too was shocked by the sheer stupidity of what Leona had just dropped on them.

“Are you saying…” Jamil said, very slowly, anger seeping into his voice. “That you broke up with me, out of guilt?!”

“More like, so I wouldn't get in the way of your freedom again,” Leona said, now looking a little uncomfortable. Good. “Err…at least I thought you would've been free by now. Seems I was wrong.”

Jamil stared at him in disbelief. All these years he had wondered why Leona had been so cruel after the attempt on Kalim's life. After he lost everything when the Asims found out. Leona had actually considered it… a mercy?

“You idiot!”

“You goddamn idiot. Asshole. You had no right! You had no right to take the blame for that.”

“It was me. I was the one who wasn't there. I deluded myself into thinking I was free, that there would be no consequences if something happened to Kalim.”

“I may have ruined my life but at least it had been my choice. How dare you take that away from me? The only time I've ever had autonomy over my life!”

“I chose to be with you, and–” Jamil choked up, angry tears were streaming down his face. “You took that away from me. My choice. My happiness. You.”

“Me?” Leona finally interjected. Out of all the things he could've picked out of his whole tirade, he was confused about the only thing that had made sense to Jamil when everything else had fallen apart.

“Of course ‘you’, you imbecile! Why would you ever think I wanted to lose you on top of everything else?!” Jamil cried out, finally being able to let out years of frustration, confusion, and betrayal.

A heavy silence hit them once more as Leona let Jamil's words settle. He looked pensive, conflicted.

“You were supposed to do better without me,” Leona sighed. “You did it all on your own before. I thought… I thought that, without me, you could do it again. What did you ever need me for if not to stand in your way?”

Tears pricked behind Jamil's eyes again, out frustration– sadness? He didn't know anymore. He felt so stupid. Of course, this had been the reason. He knew Leona's streak of self-loathing, which bordered on masochism on the best of days. He wanted to be mad at him, stay mad at him forever, but… 

“...Love, Leona” Jamil said wearily, sighing in defeat. “Despite your incredible attempt at sabotaging it, love is what I needed you for.”

—

“Ya know, Leona?” Ruggie sighed, “Sometimes your way of showing love just ain't enough… this whole game of chess…”

“Spare me the judgement,” Leona drawled lazily,  continuing to stare at the ceiling he had been staring at for a worrying amount since he had broken up with Jamil.

Not for the first time in his life, Ruggie felt a pang of pity towards his Housewarden. He was intimately familiar with his brand of self-destruction; the permanent ache in his arm was a reminder of that, but he thought Leona had learned from it since then.

They had never been the type to openly discuss their relationship and their feelings around his overblot, but Ruggie had always had the impression that they had an understanding between the two.

The apology hidden in Leona's recovery towards something more healthy. His attempts– feeble as they may have looked on the outside– to open himself up to more relationships, to find his own pride to rule, had been his way of showing reconciliation.

So why on earth was he doing this to Jamil?

“If you're gonna stand there judging me in silence, can you do it somewhere else?” Leona growled. “There's no game of chess. It's simple. I ruined his life, and I'm getting the fuck out of it so he can get it back.”

“That–, you don't actually think–,” Ruggie struggled for a response. Knowing full well that that would exactly be the conclusion Leona's mind would jump to. So he settled on a different angle. 

“Jamil won't understand.”

Not like they did, not in the same way. Jamil's relationship with Leona was never built on the same kind of understanding as what they had. Probably for the better, Ruggie had always thought, as it was frankly not terribly healthy to begin with, but it was one that worked for them, and only them.

“He doesn't need to,” Leona sighed wearily. “He doesn't need to love me to get what he wants.”

But you need it, Ruggie couldn't help but think as he looked down at the depressed figure in front of him sadly. There was nothing left to say, he wasn’t going to convince Leona of his stupidity. All he could do was sweep up the pieces left behind after the storm, like he always did. 

“Well,” Ruggie said eventually, shaking his head dramatically. “At least get your lazy ass off the bed, I need to change the sheets.”

The miserable groan in response told Ruggie that this would be a rough couple of months ahead– maybe even years.

—

“What are they saying? I can't hear–”

“Shhh,” Falena hushed the Asim kid, pressing his ear against the dining room door. He also couldn't hear very well, but from the sound of it, Jamil was currently cussing out his baby brother. Good. 

This was what Leona needed. He was sure of it. Falena was convinced of this ever since he had secretly attended the magishift tournament between Leona's school and that of Royal Sword Academy. 

He'd never told Leona that he'd attended it; if he had Leona would've probably thrown the match just to spite him, or at least made sure he never saw how much he'd actually enjoyed the sport.

Falena expected to see Leona enjoy himself playing magishift, what he hadn't expected to see, though, was to see Leona happy.

He still remembered the smile on Leona's face as he was greeted by his team, the hyena boy– Ruggie– tackling him first, before he had shoved his brother towards another boy. 

After the match, Falena knew two things:

Ruggie grounded Leona, and Jamil made him happy. Happier than he'd ever seen his brother in his entire life.

Which is why it had been so baffling to Falena to see Leona back at the palace after his graduation, his misery total. He'd gone back to his usual despondent self, isolating himself from his family and any responsibility he had to his country.

Falena sighed, this is why he needed this to work. If he could somehow bring these two together again, maybe he could finally convince Leona to be his advisor. He and Sunset Savanna needed Leona, and Leona needed Jamil. 

“Ahem,” a stern voice interrupted Falena’s thoughts behind him. The hair of his neck stood up in dread as he recognised it all too well. Oh no.

He turned around, chuckling heartily. “Kifaji! What brings you here?”

Kifaji raised one of his impressive eyebrows, looking deeply unimpressed himself. “Excellent question, Your Majesty. I say, I was wondering the exact same thing for you and your… esteemed guest.” He looked between the two of them, before his eyes landed on the door behind them.

“Sorry, Kifaji, an important business meeting going on,” Falena smiled, sidestepping in front of the door. “You can't enter.”

“…and neither can we,” he added sheepishly as Kifaji’s other eyebrow joined its sibling in perplexity.

“...I see,” Kifaji sighed, rubbing his temple. “May I suggest that Your Majesty conducts this important business meeting away from prince Leona and his very precarious situation with Mister Jamil Viper? We wouldn't want to interrupt any… fruituous outcome of their reunion, would we?”

—

“Your brother is very invested in us meeting again,” Jamil said in amusement after the muffled noises outside of the room dissipated.

Leona wasn't so amused. He wanted to kill Falena more than ever for putting him into this position, for making Jamil think this was his pathetic attempt at getting him back. The idiot just steamrolled over his life like usual, regardless of any consequences.

What did he think would happen? That they'd just talk it out, and it would all be okay? Leona scoffed. Even if Jamil miraculously forgave him for dumping him in the worst time of his life, there was no way of them coming back from that. The best Leona could do for Jamil right now was to ensure he would take the deal. Let him be free, free from his life, and Leona's baggage.

“I don't think he quite realises the power imbalance he created by making his offer,” Jamil's voice cut through his thoughts. 

When Leona looked up, Jamil was leaning casually against the dinner table, looking surprisingly calm for the bullshit he and his family was putting him through.

Leona snorted derisively, “you can say he's an idiot, if we threw people in jail for insulting the crown I would be on death row by now.”

Jamil gave him a crooked smile, “noted. Idiocy must run in the family, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” Leona growled in annoyance, quickly growing tired of this whole scene. “Go ahead, have your fill.”

“Wow. You're awfully quick to be annoyed at the comparison, when the both of you seem very comfortable at making decisions for someone else,” Jamil said nonchalantly. Still weirdly calm, as if he had somehow found his peace in this ridiculous situation.

Leona deflated, being compared to Falena was one thing, but the fact that Jamil had a point stung more than anything else he could've picked at.

“What do you want from me,” Leona sighed wearily. “Revenge?”

Jamil raised his eyebrows in surprise, before they settled into a pensive expression. “I thought I did,” he said softly, after a bit. “I wanted you to hurt, like you hurt me.”

Leona nodded. He expected as much.

“But I don't,” Jamil continued, smiling wryly. “It's not what I want. It's what you want.”

It was Leona's turn now to look surprised. “What?” he said incredulously. “You're out of your mind.”

“See. I thought so too, but it's true isn't it?” Jamil got up off the table to close the distance between them, now looking mildly annoyed, as if he was finally starting to piece his anger together. “You want to hurt, because you're a coward. You always have been.”

Leona growled, his blood boiling. “Yeah? How’s that?”

Jamil didn’t back down, he glared up at Leona angrily. “It’s so clear to me now. It’s easy, you burn bridges so you don’t have to feel the difficult feelings. You saw my life fall apart and felt responsible, guilty, and instead of letting yourself feel that, you punished yourself. No matter who else falls with you!”

“You want me to make you hurt, so you don't have to feel guilty for the fact that my life hasn't gotten anywhere even after your magnanimous self-sacrifice. Except it wasn't self-sacrifice at all, was it? It was self-harm.”

Jamil’s words extinguished Leona’s anger like a cold shower. Nausea hit him. A familiar dread settled in his stomach, the same dread he had felt when his plans to save his dorm’s scholarships fell apart, the same dread he felt when Jamil had come to him in tears, telling him the Asims were punishing him and his family for letting Kalim get hurt.

It was true, any hurt was better than the never-ending guilt. He would disintegrate the world in order to never feel like that again.

It was also true that it was cowardice to run away from it.

“...I know,” he sighed, all fight leaving his body. “I am a coward.”

Jamil made a surprised noise, looking unsure what to do with Leona's response. 

“Um…” he raised his hand awkwardly, hovering next to Leona's arm. “Well– you're not always a coward–”

“Oh shut up,” Leona rolled his eyes. The awkward pity shuffle was so much worse than being called a coward. “I ain't made of glass. You're right, I should've talked to you. I run away from my guilt, it's what I do, yada yada. I'm sorry.”

Jamil didn't say anything, but a smile tugged on his lips, and Leona wished that didn't make his hands tingle. He stretched them out. 

“Any chance I could convince you to take the deal?” he said in an attempt to distract himself. “You wouldn't have to stay here, or be indebted to me. I promise.”

“How?” Jamil tilted his head. “I don't see why your brother would bother to buy me out out of charity. Trust me that the Asim family would not make it easy, or cheap. And as I recall… you hate it when he spends your country's money aimlessly.”

“...it wouldn't be aimlessly,” Leona muttered, anger spiking up again. He hated it when Jamil spoke about himself like that. He'd always hated it, from the moment they went through S.T.Y.X. and he had considered himself expendable.

“Pardon?” Jamil said, looking confused.

“You're worth everything to me,” Leona spoke up more loudly. “Why don't you ever get that? Everything, even at the cost of my own happiness. That's why… I'll tell my brother I'll be his advisor in exchange for your freedom.”

Jamil was stunned silent for a while, his eyes darting back and forth as he let Leona's words sink in, he looked hopeful for a fraction of a second before his face settled into a deep frown.

“What did I just tell you about self-sacrifice?” Jamil spit out. “Is that really what you want? What is it that you want, Leona?”

“This is my dream.”

“Sharing my interests, my thoughts, my home with someone who understands what it's like. Someone like me.”

The words he had spoken so earnestly that day years ago swam back into his mind. He wanted Jamil free, he knew that to be true. It was true. But…

“...I want you,” the words spilled out of his mouth before he knew it. “I want you, I've missed you.”

His vision blurred suddenly and he realised that he was crying. 

Before he could wipe them away, someone pushed into his arms. Jamil.

“Idiot,” Jamil muttered wetly into his chest. “Me too.”

—

“I'm not thanking you.”

“Come now, Leona, what makes you think I expected you to after all these years?” Falena laughed. “Seeing you happy and in love is enough for me.”

Leona pretend-hurled on the spot. “Yeah, like you had no ulterior motive whatsoever. Give me a break.”

Falena sighed, putting both hands on his hips in exasperation. “Is it so hard to believe I want to see you happy, brother?”

When that was met with a noncommittal shrug, Falena threw up his hands. “So what if I thought you being happy would make you more functional of a person. Leona, you haven't done anything with your life since you graduated! Don't you want to do anything? You could do so much for your country, maybe if you were on my council–”

“There it is,” Leona laughed derisively. “How altruistic of you, brother.”

“It was a suggestion,” Falena parried. “A suggestion you'd be great at, Leona. Think about it. Aren't you always the one who tells me my decisions for this country are foolish? Why are you so resistant to the idea of being on my side?”

Leona paused for a second, looking hesitant. Falena's ears perked up. Was he finally getting through to him?

“I'm not joining your council of idiots.”

That was a no.

“But…” Leona continued, visibly straining himself to give Falena any ground. “I'd be open to discuss my place in Sunset Savanna, on one condition…”

The smile that broke on Falena’s face may have amplified Leona's scowl, but he didn't care. He knew it. Leona had been wrong, he was the best match-maker.

“I'm listening.”

—Epilogue—

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Huh?” Leona looked up from his notebook, covered in ancient sigils with messy translations scribbled on the sides. Jamil was standing in front of him, arms crossed, looking as exasperated as ever. He grinned, he would never get tired of that frown. 

“Of course you weren't, that's my bad,” Jamil sighed. “I asked if you had seen my ancient rune dictionary? Pretty sure you stole it the other day.”

“‘Borrowed’ is what normal people would call that, and no… I haven't. Could be in my bag,” Leona lied. Truth be told, he probably did lose it somewhere. They had been engrossed in translating the runes in the Sunset Savanna mines for days now, and Leona may or or may not have forgotten his own dictionary. He also may or may not have left Jamil's copy in one of the abandoned rooms somewhere.

“Your bag…” Jamil lamented. “So it's lost.”

“Maybe so,” Leona replied sheepishly, pulling Jamil into his arms. “could make it up to you?”

“I am not letting you get away with losing my school supplies by charming your way into my pants, Leona,” Jamil deadpanned, though the corners of his mouth told him that he was absolutely about to let him. 

“Don't worry, I'll get you another,” Leona grinned, “but who says I can't do both?”

“You better. You're the one who wanted me to do my internship here, you better not mess it up for me,” Jamil smiled, allowing Leona to pull him into his lap. 

Leona kissed him with a content hum, “Of course I won't, I've learnt my lesson. You can do that all on your own.”

“Precisely,“ Jamil nodded proudly, before frowning. “I'm not going to.”

“Of course you're not,” Leona murmured, leaning in for more kisses.

“I have to graduate,” Jamil rambled on in between kisses.

“You do.”

“So I can stay here, and continue helping your Blot research.”

“Ideally, yes. That would be great.”

“Leona?” Jamil muttered against his lips.

“Hmm?” Leona looked up into Jamil's eyes.

“I think I love you.”

Leona smiled, a familiar warm feeling spreading in his chest.

“...I think I like that.”

Me too.