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Hypnos was always tired. Always. The only reason he knew what it felt like to be perfectly rested was because in his realm he generally felt fine, as if only there he was in his natural state. Which was probably the truth, but he never thought much about it. What was the point after all? He had a job, and that job required being awake.
On some days, it wasn't so bad. He could just let the feeling run in the background of his mind as he did his tasks, maybe take a nap or two (or three, or four…) as his shift went on, and he would be fine. The good part about being tired all the time is that he had grown used to it eons ago, as this had been a problem since he was born. In his youth, his mother would frequently try to correct it - his laziness, she called. She gave up, eventually, probably having sensed that it was a hopeless cause. He still internalized her displeasure of his sleeping habit, and liked to think that he found a way to get around it just enough to get work done, even if it wasn't perfect.
On other days, though, it was terrible. Downright awful. He could barely keep his eyes open, and when he did, he could feel them just… sinking in. Heavy. Heavier than usual. Speaking felt like too much work, hearing was painful, seeing any light felt like enough to blind him. He felt exhausted, on the brink of tears, constantly wishing to be nowhere but his room, laying comfortably in his haven of pillows and blankets.
Today was one of the latter days.
It felt like his head was full of fog. He did his best to greet the shades as usual, but couldn't bring himself to make the little comments he was so used to making. Thinking was too much work, out of question. One shade or the other had asked him questions, and he did his best to give proper directions, but mostly they stayed out of his hair, even the ones he knew to be more chatty. His state of mind was probably easy to notice, and normally he would have been worried about appearing to be in such a foul mood, but today even that was too much work. He felt like he was about to shut off.
Sometimes he would doze off, only to be awakened by Lord Hades' voice booming from across the hall. At first he would comment on the length of the line, or ask him to keep awake, with that stern tone of his that came so naturally, but as the day went on he started to just call out his name. He wondered if it was some form of mercy, if he too had noticed his state.
"-Hypnos, mate! You alright there?"
A distinctly grayish pair of hands motioned in front of his eyes. He squeezed them for a second, slightly overwhelmed by the amount of movement, before looking up. It was Zagreus.
"Oh, uh, hey, Zag!" He forced a smile, and hoped that it was anything like his usual ones. "Didn't see you there! Need anything?"
He felt like he should have said more, he knew he normally would have, but simply didn't have enough energy to do so. It upset him, saying hi to Zag every other hour was his favorite part of the day (along with saying something cheeky to annoy Meg whenever she passed by defeated… he found the looks he got back to be positively thrilling!).
"Well, no, it's just… I've passed by like, three times, and you haven't said anything." Hypnos raised his eyebrows and looked at the list, but Zagreus continued before he could speak. "And that's fine, by the way, you don't have to! It's just that you always do, and you were just staring fixedly at the wall too. Is something wrong?"
The concern on the Prince's face and tone somewhat increased his mood, and he felt a bit bad for it. Like it was selfish of him to like it. But to know that someone at least cared enough to ask…
Still, the thought of explaining everything to him, in the middle of the hall too, was completely overwhelming. Even hearing him speak didn't feel too good, as if the sound pierced his ears, even if he liked what he heard.
So he shook his head in feigned confusion. "Something wrong? With little old me? No, Zag, I'm fine! Nothing's ever wrong with me! I just got distracted, that's all!" Usually he was a pretty good actor, when he wanted to be. Most people didn't know when he was sad or angry, he always covered those up pretty well unless it was too intense. Exhaustion, however, was debilitating. He hoped the pretending wasn't as awful as it sounded to him. "… Now, I should probably go back to the shades, right? You're probably super busy anyway!"
His attempts to cover up were useless, judging by the fact that Zagreus' face hadn't changed at all. Well, it had, but only to look slightly more concerned, which wasn't what he had been going for.
"… Listen, mate, why don't we go to my room? We can talk better there."
Normally, Hypnos would have been ecstatic by the invitation. Being invited to Zagreus' room always felt special, even after they had already established their (best!) friendship. Sure, it had no door, so technically it was a pretty public space, but it was all about the fact that Zagreus wanted him there, inside his room. It just felt intimate, in a way (he probably put too much thought into it every time, but still…).
Today, though, it was a bit bothersome. He figured Zagreus would probably ask a bunch of questions, and then Hypnos would have to answer to them, and it would be so much work. Probably really hard questions too, like "are you okay?" and "what happened?" and the likes. He would probably struggle to explain, and Zag, being understanding but overall still a normal person (with a ridiculous amount of persistence, perhaps, but generally normal), would not understand any of his reasoning and just ask even more questions! Which would be even worse! And then he would probably just conclude that Hypnos is being lazy and needs to grow up about it, but not say anything about it because he is nice.
So he had to find a reason to refuse, politely. In a quick look around, he found the perfect excuse. "You know," he whispered, to really sell it, gesturing to the side with his eyes, "your dad is like, right there! I can't just leave my post in front of the boss!"
It wasn't as if that wasn't a real concern, it's just… Lord Hades usually didn't really mind. Hell, he would always let him sleep on the clock right in front of him until the lines got too big to ignore. Right in front of him. He would also let him doodle in official paperwork, and compliment him on it! Hades was generally pretty lax with him, he felt. There was always the odd chance of him being in a foul mood, of course, but with the return of the Queen those had immensely decreased.
Zagreus seemed to believe him, but that didn't stop him from trying, of course. "It's fine, he won't mind. And if he does, it's going to have been my fault for asking you to leave, not yours! You're technically supposed to obey to the Prince, right?" Hypnos couldn't help but smile a bit at that, knowing full well that no one in the House except Dusa followed that one. "So, will you? Please, I'm worried."
Hypnos was about to lament that Zagreus was so stubborn, until he heard the last words. To have his care for him said in such an explicit way… it caught him off guard. Softened him up as well. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad. He, finally, nodded.
They made their way to Zagreus' room, and, as expected, Hades didn't even look up from his paperwork. Nyx was nowhere to be seen. Hypnos was glad for that, he already felt bad enough without her acknowledging his current state.
As they stepped inside, Hypnos noted mentally that Zagreus must have added some new carpets to the room, considering the softness below his feet. Before, the floor was just cold (as cold as it could get in the Underworld, of course). Only then he realized that he hadn't even been floating. Was he like that the whole day? No wonder Zag was so worried.
Zagreus turned to look at him and stayed silent for a few moments, likely analyzing his appearance, before speaking.
"I think I should have asked this before, but are you even in the mood to talk about it? I don't mean to intrude too much… I'm sorry. And please be honest, I promise I won't get offended."
Hypnos took a while to answer, surprised by Zagreus' self-awareness at that moment. Not that he was intruding too much, it's expected to worry about your friends, he supposed, but he didn't expect him to consider that he might not want to speak at all.
Part of him wanted to lie and tell him to ask away, out of fear that he would get upset if he didn't. But then, Zag had just said that he wouldn't, right? And while deceit was a thing, a thing he was terrible at identifying most of the time, he felt like he should probably assume the best of him, since they were best friends and all. Maybe he could just be honest with Zagreus.
"… Haha, yeah, I don't, actually… Hope that's… fine," he chuckled nervously, diverging his gaze for only a moment. It felt awkward to be even slightly vulnerable in front of someone after so many years of hiding it.
Zagreus nodded and gave him a soft assuring smile. "Of course it is." He stayed quiet for a few more seconds before speaking again. "So, uh, I'm not sure about what I can do for you, since I don't know what's going on, but… do you want a hug? Maybe it could help, I don't know, I'm quite fond of hugs. It's okay if you don't, though!"
Another question that surprised him. A hug… Gods, he didn't even remember the last time he had hugged anyone. As part of his domain he would, of course. He would hug young children into his realm, and people he knew would be having the last of their dreams before being taken by his brother, and sometimes his (few) worshipers would ask for his embrace to have a proper rest, but it wasn't the same. Again, that was just part of being Sleep. Hugging a loved one was different, as thankful as he was for those little bits of touch.
Did he want a hug? It had the potential to be overwhelming, since it involved so much touching… but the thought of being enveloped in the warmth of someone else convinced him rather quickly. He nodded softly.
"Sure. A hug sounds nice."
It felt awkward to accept. And the way in which Zagreus opened his arms for him was awkward too, as caring as the gesture was. However, when he wrapped his arms around him, and Zagreus did the same, pulling him close, he no longer cared. It felt good. Just as warm as he had hoped, and so, so comfortable. He and the Prince were about the same height, but it felt natural for Hypnos to hide his face in his neck, away from the lights of the torches. It was the right choice, he realized, as he felt he press his face against his hair. Maybe it was because Zagreus was so strong and always fighting, but the hug was tight, and that was one of the best parts of it. The pressure felt heavenly.
They stayed like that for a while. He didn't bother to move, didn't want to. Zag eventually spoke, though.
"Do you… want to lay down? You look really tired."
Hypnos stared up, and was met with concern again, but also cheeks dusted with red that made him smile ever-so-slightly. The question did have him surprised… again.
"But… it's your bed," he said, hoping the tone would be enough to convey what he meant. Was it really okay to lay on his bed like that? Were they close enough?
"It is, that's why I'm offering it to you! It's probably way more comfortable than that sleeper-seat I got you," Zagreus chuckled.
Hypnos' eyebrows raised in surprise. He didn't know it had been Zagreus who got that for him! But looking back, he should have guessed, considering his taste for furnishing.
"Gee…" he couldn't help but smile again. He was glad to have Zag as a friend. "Okay!"
They let go of each other, and Hypnos immediately missed the warmth. He hoped the blankets on his bed were actually warm, and not just for decoration…
The bed wasn't too soft, but it was better than the sleeper-seat, of course. It was only natural that a warrior would have a firmer bed, spine health and all. Hypnos preferred everything much softer, but it was nice anyway. Just knowing that it was Zagreus' bed, and that he cared enough to offer it to him, made it comfortable enough.
(It disappointed him slightly that it didn't even smell like Zag. It made sense, after all he almost never laid down, and he had heard Lord Hades say something about him not needing a new bed the other day, so it was probably brand-new too.)
He closed his eyes briefly and stayed that way for a while, feeling sleep overtaking him slowly, but then felt movement and opened them again. It was Zagreus, sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Oh, did I wake you up? I'm sorry, I-"
Hypnos interrupted him with the reach of his hand, pulling gently on his clothes.
"Lay down with me? The pressure was nice.…"
Only after saying it, had he registered his request. It was… well, it didn't feel wrong. They had hugged before, and he was laying on his bed, so what harm would it do to hug while laying on the bed? It still probably wasn't something he would have asked if he had been more awake, or feeling better. He wondered if Zagreus would find it weird.
"Oh, really?" The few seconds of silence had him worried, but then he continued with a smile. "Of course."
Before he knew, Zagreus and him were both under the blankets, Hypnos wrapped around his duvet as well, and Zagreus hugged him close to his chest, just as tight as before. It felt blissful, just feeling him there, listening to his breathing as he dozed off.
After some time like that, Zagreus spoke again. "Than gets like this too, sometimes… like everything's too much. But he gets really snappy instead."
Hypnos didn't have the energy to chuckle, but he did find it amusing. His brother was always pretty snappy, but on some days it was much, much worse. He didn't know it was from exhaustion, though. He wondered if it even was the same. How could it be, when Thanatos was so much better than him? When mother never had to correct him about it?
"Well, everyone has bad days to some degree, but it looks like yours really hit harder. Especially when you're always so tired… that sounds hard to deal with. I don't know how you still do your work anyway, it's impressive."
Impressive? Hypnos never thought anything about that was impressive. In fact, he felt like he should do more. Doing his job was only the expected, as his mother would always say.
But it felt good to know that someone thought it was. And it felt good to know that someone had even noticed he was always tired. It probably made his life harder than they realized. But Zag did.
"I should let you sleep, though. Sorry, mate. Good dreams."
At the point, strangely, Zagreus voice wasn't bothersome at all. Perhaps because now he had his eyes closed, and he was warm, comfortable and resting, so suddenly hearing wasn't so bad. Perhaps it was because it was just Zagreus. Perhaps a mix of both, even. There wasn't much silence anyway, Orpheus could be heard in the background, muffled by the distance, singing one of his beautiful laments.
"Thanks, Zag…" he managed to mumble with the little energy he had left. He felt Zagreus put his face against his head once again. It felt good. Intimate.
And so the two slowly drifted into sleep, lulled by the gentle sound of Orpheus' lyre.