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"Hello?" Jiang Cheng croaks, once he's freed his hand from his blankets. His digital clock blinks at him, green and obnoxious in the dark. Eleven-thirteen, it says. Squinting, he rolls to his other side and pushes his face into the pillow, convinced, as he always is when he wakes in the night, that he should get one of those clocks with red read-outs. Yanli-jie claims blue and green light is bad for sleeping.
"Jiang Wanyin," a voice intones from his phone. His fingers clench in surprise, phone case creaking.
"Uh." Grimacing, he lifts his head from the pillow, now squinting at his phone.
"It is Lan Wangji," the voice says, and Jiang Cheng holds in his immediate startled response, his screen displaying that it is, indeed, the person he would, if pressed, vote 'least likely to call him in the middle of the night'.
"Hello," he repeats on auto-pilot, attempting to blink the sleep from his eyes. "Did someone die?"
There's a sound. Fuck if Jiang Cheng can qualify it. Maybe annoyed? 'Annoyed' is fairly standard for Lan Wangji, when it comes to Jiang Cheng.
"No one has died." There's a pause while Jiang Cheng frowns and tosses his blanket from his body, scooting to the edge of the bed, brain slowly coming online. "That I am aware of," Lan Wangji adds, sounding surly about it.
Pulling the phone from his ear, Jiang Cheng stares at it, eyebrows scrunched in confusion. Lan Wangji's name shines up at him, unmistakeable.
"Is um… What happened? Is something wrong?" Jiang Cheng tries. Rather than responding, like any normal person calling near midnight, Lan Wangji subjects Jiang Cheng to the most petulant rustling and huffing sounds he can recall hearing in his life. The fuck is the guy doing? Burrowing into his perfectly organized linen closet?
"Did you know," Lan Wangji says, once silence falls. Jiang Cheng grits his teeth, anger building. Has this asshole graduated from passive-aggressive comments at their weekly D&D gatherings to late-night insult-calls? "That Disney lied?"
"What?" Jiang Cheng snaps out of habit, then tilts his head. "Disney?" Lan Wangji has shown no dearth of creativity, when it comes to pointing out Jiang Cheng's various shortcomings, but this is an angle he's not tried before. Jiang Cheng realizes his fist is clenched in the fabric of his sleeping pants, and forces himself to relax.
"Mn," Lan Wangji responds. Or like. He hums it. It almost sounds lazy. "About lemmings."
"Lemmings?" Jiang Cheng repeats, staring at his bare feet on the floor. His clock flashes balefully in his peripheral vision. Eleven-fifteen. "The like… animal?"
"Yes," comes the reply, and then a sigh. Blinking, Jiang Cheng sits up straighter. Has he ever heard Lan Wangji sigh? "They lied," Lan Wangji says again.
"About lemmings," Jiang Cheng manages. There is something… off, about Lan Wangji's voice.
"Mn." Rustling makes its way over the connection again, and then a long, slow breath. Jiang Cheng blinks. Holy shit, is Lan Wangji drunk? "They do not perform mass suicide by leaping off cliffs."
Completely outside of his control, Jiang Cheng feels his cheeks stretching. His smile grows until it scrunches his eyes shut. "Is that right?" he says, phone crammed as tight as it can go against his ear. This is hilarious. Wei Wuxian will never believe him.
"I researched," Lan Wangji tells him, his voice full of his usual confidence, just… a tiny bit slower. "Apparently, they turn white in winter." Lan Wangji huffs, and Jiang Cheng's eyebrows shoot up. Was that a laugh?! "Cute."
"Very cute," Jiang Cheng immediately agrees, then shoves a handful of his blanket over his face, muffling his laughter. "What— What else? Did you learn?" he eventually says.
"Mmm," Lan Wangji hums, and for heaven's sake, more rustling? What is this guy even doing? How long do you have to fuss in bed to get comfortable? "They will, apparently, when times are lean, cannibalize each other."
Jiang Cheng holds in an incredulous sound. "That is… less cute," he says at last.
"They are cute," Lan Wangji growls. A sharp giggle makes its way from Jiang Cheng's throat without his permission. "Look at the pictures."
"No, of course." Jiang Cheng's jaw is slack. This has to be one of the funniest things that has happened in the last year. He cannot wait to tease Lan Wangji about this next Thursday night. "What else?"
"There was a photograph," Lan Wangji says, his voice low and serious. "Of two lemmings, fighting. They looked very fierce." Jiang Cheng, face shoved back into his blanket, holds his phone away, guffawing. "It reminded me of us."
Jiang Cheng's laughter trails off, his hand—and the blanket—falling away. "Of us?" he says, mind whirring. "Is that why you called?"
"We could bed down together," Lan Wangji says. Jiang Cheng is not certain his eyes have ever been wider. "To stay warm."
"Not to eat each other?"
A scoff travels over the line. "I am a vegetarian."
"I… guess that's true," Jiang Cheng breathes. This is fucking surreal. "Um, Lan Wangji."
"Mn."
"Listen, I think you're drunk. We should… probably talk about this again when you've sobered up."
Lan Wangji makes a disgruntled sound, but, notably, does not disagree.
"How about I— Do you want me to call you tomorrow? To talk?"
"About lemmings?" Lan Wangji asks, and Jiang Cheng chokes down a giggle at how hopeful he sounds.
"Sure." Grinning, Jiang Cheng flops back into bed, tugging his blanket in place. "And 'bedding down' together."
"Very well." A pause. "I woke you, didn't I."
"That's okay," Jiang Cheng says, and finds he means it. "This was fun."
A hum, low and thoughtful, carries over the line. "I will wish you good night, then."
"Good night," Jiang Cheng says, smiling so wide his cheeks hurt. "I'll call you tomorrow. Are you… Will you remember any of this when you wake up?"
Lan Wangji sighs, shuddering. "If past experience is any indicator… No." More rustling sounds drift from the phone. "I will write myself a note."
"Okay," Jiang Cheng says, still grinning. "You do that."
"I will."
"Sounds good."
"I'm doing it right now."
"Great," Jiang Cheng laughs. "Anyways. Good night, Lan Wangji."
"Sleep well, Jiang Wanyin."
"Right. Um, I will."
The line disconnects, and Jiang Cheng stares up at his ceiling in the dark, filled with a strange, giddy happiness. "Lemmings?" he says aloud, the word coming out on a laugh. "What a fucking weirdo."
He is going to give Lan Wangji so much shit about this tomorrow. Dropping his phone back to his nightstand, he curls up, eyes closing. He can't fucking wait.