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Making her way back to Auntie Pezza, Izzy bites at the nail of her thumb with a confused expression. She was just running around Henny’s workplace to find Papi so she could ask him how long it was going to take Santa to get here, when she saw him.
He looked just like she imagined he would; a big belly with a fluffy red coat, a beard that probably tickles and a red hat being placed on his head by her Papi.
Izzy didn’t know Papi knows Santa Claus. Do all adults know Santa Claus?
At first, it looked like they were friends, Santa Claus was smiling at Papi and Papi was laughing. But then…
“There you are!” Autie Pezza shouts, picking her up off her feet and swinging her around. “Where did you manage to run off to, little Princess?”
“I…” she stammers. “I saw Papi kissing Santa Claus.”
Auntie Pezza breaks out laughing, but Izzy doesn’t understand what’s so funny. Papi has always told her that kisses on the lips are for someone special. He’s said they are for her and for Henny only, because he loves them the most. Does he love Santa Claus the most too? Does Henny know?
“Not to worry,” Auntie Pezza tells her with a smacking kiss on her cheek. “Shall we go and see if there are any snowmen cupcakes left? Papi will join us soon, I’m sure.”
Snowman cupcakes do sound enticing. Enticing enough to forget about Papi and Santa Claus for a moment.
She’s running her finger through the snow-white icing when another finger scoops some up as well.
“That’s delicious, Mija.”
Papi smiles at her when she looks up. Her first instinct is to tell him off for stealing her treats, but then she remembers there are even more important things to talk about.
“Do you love Santa Claus?” she blurts out and Papi quirks his eyebrow.
“What do you mean?” he asks, squatting down to be closer. “I mean, doesn’t everybody? He does give us presents every year.”
“Do you love him the most?”
“What? No. I love you and Henry the most.”
Papi looks upset now.
“Then why were you kissing him?” she asks quietly, like it’s a secret. “On the lips.”
Papi freezes, his eyes going so wide it’s almost funny. Then he starts laughing, just like Auntie Pezza had.
“Oh, Mija, I love you so much!”
He pulls her into a hug, the cupcake still in her hands and now probably on his shirt as well.
“Izzy, do you wanna meet Santa Claus?” Papi asks when he pulls back.
And what kind of a dumb question is that?
🎅 🎅 🎅
One hour earlier
With his hands on his sides, Henry stares at the slumped figure in front of him. A horrible snore escapes the man on the couch. His couch. The one he will need to get professionally cleaned after today.
There’s a knock on the door behind him and a concerned: “What’s going on?”
Henry turns towards Alex, lifts one eyebrow and turns back to glare at the reason for the current lump of anxiety lodged in his chest.
“Pez sent me. What’s-” Alex starts again, but as soon as he fully steps inside, realisation dawns on him.
“Santa?” he asks, quietly shutting the door.
“Santa,” Henry nods.
“Do we need an ambulance?” Alex asks, probably just to make sure, because he doesn’t sound worried about the man in the slightest.
“Just some water and ibuprofen. Judging by the smell on his breath, he drank an entire liquor store. Probably to fight off the nerves.”
“Why become a Santa if you can’t hack it?” Alex tuts, nudging the man’s leg with his foot. Other than an even loader snore, there is no reaction.
“Honestly? The money, I reckon. He asked for a good penny.”
Henry’s shoulders slump on a long exhale. There is still the tiny issue of a group of exciting children in the recreation hall, waiting for Santa, while Santa is sleeping off his stupor. But Alex is here, and with Alex at his side, nothing is unsurmountable.
“What do we do? Should we wake him?” Alex asks.
“Even if we could, would you want him near the kids?”
“Yeah, no, I’m not letting him anywhere near Izzy.”
“I’m not sure what other options we have, though,” Henry sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s too late to find another Santa. I’m sure they’re all fully booked and even if they aren’t, it’s too short notice. We only have about an hour.”
Alex steps forward, bending over the man on the couch, taking him in with pinched eyebrows, and snaps back up with a huff. He bites his bottom lip as he turns around, scanning the room.
Good, he’s already coming up with a plan.
“You could be Santa,” Alex says.
Wait, no, another plan. They need another plan.
“Me?” Henry stammers. “I’m not… No… I can’t be…”
Alex chuckles at his frantic attempts to refuse, stepping closer to soothingly rub his arms. Henry looks at him with a slight panic in his eyes.
“You’d be a great Santa,” Alex reassures him. “Santa’s are calm and fatherly. That’s you, baby.”
“You could be Santa,” Henry reflects, already picturing Alex in the suit.
“Doubt it,” Alex laughs. “Fatherly, fine, but calm? Not me, and you know it. I’m not gonna be able to sit still and listen to dozens of kids telling me what they want for Christmas.”
Dammit, that makes perfect sense.
“Pez then. Pez could do it.”
“Pez would be an excellent Christmas Elf, but he’d be way too extravagant to be Santa. Can you imagine? He’ll probably be on the Amazon app halfway through to order all this kids all they’ve ever wished for! It’s gonna be chaos!”
Henry groans. Perhaps they can ask one of the volunteers to play Santa. Or perhaps Mrs Claus, if one of the women is willing.
“Bollocks,” he mutters when he comes up empty. “I’m going to have to be Santa Claus, don’t I?”
“Yes, you are, baby,” Alex smirks, planting a kiss on the tip of Henry’s nose. “The best Santa the world has ever seen!”
Luckily, the drunk man on the couch hadn’t had the chance to get dressed before he passed out. Even more fortunate, the coat smells relatively fresh, like it had recently been steam cleaned. The boots have a funky smell to them however, so Henry is contemplating whether or not wearing his own shoes would be acceptable, eyeing the pair with suspicion.
Alex is standing behind him, fastening the straps of the belly. They have it hoisted over Henry’s undershirt, thankfully keeping it from making contact with his skin. He is still going to need a thorough shower or two when he gets home and the shirt will probably become a rag for when a dirty job needs doing around the house. Henry likes to think he’s not a snob. A Royally privileged man, raised with a silver spoon in his mouth, but not a snob. That being said, he has his limits.
With a final pat on the back, Alex steps around him. His eyes glaze over as he takes in Henry’s new physique. With some restraint, he puts a careful hand on the rounded fabric, frowning as he looks at it.
“Alex, love?” Henry asks, equally confused and amused.
“Yeah, sorry,” Alex breathes. “This is making me feel things.”
“Things?”
“Yeah, like how completely unfair it is that I can’t knock you up, no matter how hard I try.”
Henry lets out an undignified snort and Alex lights up at the sound like he always does. Twinkling eyes meet his own.
“Are you saying you’re giving up?” Henry asks, biting back a smirk.
“I’m no quitter!” Alex laughs boastfully. “I’m gonna try until it sticks and we’ll be recorded into the medical history books for being the first genetically same sex couple to conceive naturally.”
“Quite the ambition,” Henry nods, smiling widely, unable to temper his amusement any longer.
“It takes two to tango, though. You in?”
Alex pulls Henry closer with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows, reaching around Henry’s back to pull him in sideways. A frontal hug won’t be easy with this belly.
Henry reaches behind Alex to squeeze his bum.
“Whenever you want,” he says before he kisses him.
It’s a good minute or two before they pull away.
“Right,” Henry says, clearing his throat. “Already getting distracted. We should get on with it.”
“God. Fine,” Alex replies with an eyeroll.
He does, despite his objections, step back and reaches for the billowy pants and red coat. He helps Henry step into the trousers and holds up the coat so Henry can slide his arms into the sleeves. Alex does up the buttons for him as well, ever the attentive man. The belt is sown on, making it easy for Alex to fasten the clasp.
Next come the beard and wig, which are already itching before they’re even securely on his head. As Henry strokes the beard to try and tame the unruly curls, Alex snaps upright.
“Oh!” he exclaims before he runs out the door without any further explanation.
Henry is left to look at the door, baffled.
When Alex returns, it’s with two pairs of socks in his hands.
“Knew you were hating the boots,” he says, panting a bit from his haste to make it back. “Can’t blame you. Got these from donations. I’m sure they don’t mind I nicked these.”
He squats down in front of Henry until he can barely see him over his belly.
“Up,” Alex says, tapping one of his feet.
Henry holds on to a nearby chair and lifts his right foot. Alex slides not one, but two socks over his own, and then taps the other. When both his feet are amply protected, Alex reaches for the boots and helps Henry to step in them. They’re a bit snug, probably due to an overabundance of socks. He’ll most likely be hurting by the end of the day, but Henry refuses to take even a single pair off. He’ll live.
“Just one more thing,” Alex smiles widely.
The red Santa hat is dangling from his fingers. When Henry nods and slightly bows his head, Alex reaches up to place it where it belongs, giggling at the silliness of it all.
But then, as Henry stands up straight, his fingers linger a little longer when he’s done, stroking down Henry’s white wig and beard as he moves them back down.
“What is it now?” Henry chuckles quietly.
“Just imagining you at eighty,” Alex says with an adoring whisper.
“I do hope I will be able to keep up with grooming a bit better,” Henry says, pulling up his nose. “I won’t mind a beard, but I refuse to let myself go this much.”
“You won’t mind a beard?” Alex asks, his eyes snapping back up to Henry’s. How does he manage to look this lustful while Henry’s wearing a fake beard and a fake belly?
Henry shrugs.
“You’d look sexy with a beard,” Alex murmurs, leaning in closer, circumventing the belly, to press their lips together for a quick kiss.
“You’ll be complaining about how badly it itches within a week, love,” Henry says, still merely inches apart.
“I’m not complaining now, am I?” Alex smirks, rubbing their noses together.
“No, you’re not,” Henry breathes.
He pushes down until their lips meet again, this time for a less chaste embrace.
The alarm on Alex’s phone eventually tells them it’s almost time, instantly engulfing Henry with a wave of anxiety.
Sure, he has been a public figure for all of his life, standing in the spotlight, playing a certain role, but that role has never involved a fake beard and belly, now has it? This is completely uncharted territory.
“I’ll go get Pez,” Alex tells him with one more peck. “You are gonna be great, you hear me? You’re going to be the sweetest, kindest Santa in the entire city, because you’re the sweetest, kindest man I’ve ever met.”
“Thank you,” Henry whispers, because that might just have been exactly what he needed to hear. It doesn’t eliminate the overwhelming urge to run away, but it certainly lessens it.
“I’ll see you in a bit.”
And those parting words, Alex is out the door and Henry is on his own again.
It’s not for long. Pez joins him and after laughing at Henry for an exuberant amount of time, they go over the plan for the afternoon once more. Henry was part of the planning of this event, so he’s familiar with the schedule. The sudden change of plans, however, are giving him some trouble remembering where Santa – where he – is supposed to go and when.
A knock on the door makes both of them look up. Before either of them can answer, it cracks open.
“So, um, Santa?” Alex’s voice asks a bit bashfully. “There’s a slight issue, as in a certain someone caught us kissing and is a little bit confused about it.”
“What do you mean?” Henry wonders, multiple scenario’s running through his mind already.
“Izzy saw us when I didn’t close the door after I had gotten the socks,” he says and ,if Henry isn’t mistaken, he’s rather enjoying this. “Can we come in? I think we need to explain a little bit.”
“Of course, of course,” Henry hurries to say.
The door opens slowly, revealing Alex, hiding his smile by biting his lip, and Izzy, hiding behind her Papi’s leg.
“Oh, Izzy, little love,” Henry sighs, wanting to go down to her level but finding it too difficult with these bloody boots and that bloody belly.
“Santa?” she asks timidly.
Alex ushers her in and closes the door behind them.
“You know what,” Pez says, grinning. Henry almost forgot he was there. “I’ll leave you to it. I’ll be back to fetch you in ten minutes. Be good!”
He slithers out the door and closes it again with a quiet click.
“Izzy,” Alex starts, bending down to pick her up. She clings to his shoulder, eyeing Henry with careful curiosity and a hint of trepidation. “There’s something we need to tell you. You know how Santa’s always so super busy?”
“Yes,” she nods, unblinking.
“Well, Santa has many helpers all over the world. Some help him wrap up gifts, others pull the sleigh and some help him out when he’s extra busy, like today.”
“How?” she asks slowly and Henry thinks he sees a hint of recognition in her eyes.
“I’m not the real Santa,” he tells her. “Santa asked me to pretend so he can make sure everyone can get their presents in time. He want’s everyone to be happy, you see?”
“You’re not real?”
“I’m a real person. I’m not really Santa, however.”
“Don’t you recognise his voice?” Alex asks her encouragingly.
“He talks like Henny,” she says contemplative, now scanning the white hairs tickling Henry’s chin and making their way into his mouth. “But Henny doesn’t have a beard.”
“Want to know another secret?” Henry asks with a wink. He slowly takes of the hat and pulls down the beard so that it’s resting under his chin. “It’s a fake beard.”
Izzy blinks a couple of times, her mouth falling open.
“Henny?” she checks. Henry nods.
“Henry really wanted to help Santa out, so he’ll be pretending,” Alex explains. “But it is a secret. Santa doesn’t want all of the other children to know.”
“Do you remember how we pretended to be explorers last week?” Henry asks, thinking back to their trip to the park, armed with binoculars and an old plant guide.
Izzy nods.
“We weren’t really explorers, were we? We were still you and me.”
“We were playing,” she says, understanding dawning on her face.
“Yes,” Henry nods with a fond smile. “And today I’m pretending to be Santa Claus.”
“Then who do I get to be?” she asks, brows furrowing.
Alex chuckles as he kisses her hair.
“You can be you today,” he says. “I need someone to share a cupcake with, and someone who’ll teach me Jingle Bells, and who’ll craft reindeer ears with me. Can you do that?”
“Yes,” she says with a confident nod.
“In that case, are you ready?” Alex beams.
“I’m ready!” she shouts.
“One more kiss before I turn into Santa again?” Henry asks with a warm fuzzy feeling in his chest.
Izzy holds out her hands and rests them on Henry’s shoulders while Alex holds her up. Without any hesitation, she smacks a kiss on his lips and pulls away with a giggle.
“You tickle!” she laughs, rubbing her cheeks.
“I’m so sorry, little love,” Henry laughs along with her before he leans into Alex to give him one more kiss as well. “I’m afraid that’s a ‘no’ on the beard, love.”
“We can convince her, I’m sure,” Alex grins.
With a pleased expression on his face, Henry pulls the beard and moustache combination back into place and Alex helps him with the hat. They let Izzy squeeze the soft pom-pom at the end of it for good luck and then Alex and Izzy are out the door.
Henry let’s out a drawn-out sigh, chuckling at the absurdity of this afternoon. Yes, it’s silly, but he realises he wouldn’t want to miss this experience for anything in the world. He’ll even bear the anxiety over being in front of a group of people with all eyes on him, having to pretend to be someone else, if it means he gets to keep this memory.
When Pez enters and ushers him towards Santa’s chair on the make-shift stage, he realises this is both exactly like being paraded around in name of the Royal family and somehow also something completely different. In this red suit, stinking boots and itchy beard, he isn’t Prince Henry of Wales. He isn’t here to be ogled at. He might even think of it as him not even being here at all. He’s Santa, and he’s here to make a group of children and their caregivers happy. Even the teenagers, who showed up despite their reluctance and customarily pretending to be to old for it. No one is too old for gifts and snowmen cupcakes.
As he sits down, he finds Alex in the crowd, Izzy on his shoulders, both of them waving at him with matching smiles.
Today is most certainly a good day. One for the history books.
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This story is part of a collection inspired by Christmas songs.
The Spotify playlist will expand as the collection does.
We wish everyone who celebrates a Merry Christmas and everyone who doesn’t a pleasant winter and a wonderful end of the year!
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