Chapter Text
[Yuji Itadori has created a group chat]
[Yuji Itadori has added Megumi Fushiguro and eight others]
[Chat has been renamed to Chaos Family]
[Chaos Family]
[11:48 PM]
Megumi: what is this
Yuji: it’s a group chat!!
Nobara: this is going to end horribly I can already tell
Maki: wait are the teachers here too
Yuji: yup!!
Shoko: im not even a teacher why am I here
Yuji: everyone in JJT + Nanami is here!
Maki: Nobara’s right this is gonna end horribly
Megumi: wait does that mean sensei is here
Satoru: ooh what’s this?
Megumi: fuck this I’m out
[Megumi is offline]
Satoru: how mean D:
Nobara: wait I wanna change the names
[Nobara has changed her name to Shopaholic]
[Shopaholic has changed Megumi’s name to HardcoreGoth]
[Shopaholic has changed Yuji’s name to FingerLickinGood]
FingerLickinGood: wow I hate it
[Shopaholic has changed Shoko’s name to DocMcStuffins]
[Shopaholic has changed Panda’s name to Zebra]
[Shopaholic has changed Yuta’s name to Stabby]
Stabby: why
Shopaholic: i couldn’t think of anything else lol
[Shopaholic has changed Toge’s name to Tuna]
[Shopaholic has changed Maki’s name to Makiroll]
Makiroll: is that a video game reference
Shopaholic: yea
[Shopaholic has changed Satoru’s name to SugarRush]
[Shopaholic has changed Kento’s name to Workaholic]
Zebra: I am a panda!
SugarRush: lol
DocMcStuffins: why
FingerLickinGood: idk I think it fits you Ieiri-san!
SugarRush: oh right btw
SugarRush: tomorrow’s test is cancelled cuz I’m busy
FingerLickinGood: YEASSSSSS
Shopaholic: OH THANK GOD
FingerLickinGood: I was about to fail English with that test
Shopaholic: wait but the test is for science
FingerLickinGood: what no it’s not
Shopaholic: yes it is
FingerLickinGood: NO IST NOT
[HardcoreGoth is online]
HardcoreGoth: it’s on physics u dumbasses
Shopaholic: WAIT FOR REAL
Shopaholic: FUCKKKK
Makiroll: you guys are actually fucking dumb
Shopaholic: D:
Makiroll: but Nobara is an exception
Shopaholic: :D
Zebra: down bad
Tuna: whiipped
Makiroll: stfu before I gut you
Tuna: yes maam
Zebra: gut what bitch I’m literally a panda
[Makiroll is offline]
Zebra: fuck
[Zebra is offline]
HardcoreGoth: honestly what was he expecting
Stabby: lol
DocMcStuffins: go to sleep it’s already late
DocMcStuffins: I bet that most of u guys have missions in the morning
FingerLickinGood: UGHHHH WHYD U REMIND MEEE
HardcoreGoth: go to sleep
FingerLickinGood: ugh fine
FingerLickinGood: it’s gonna take me like an hour to get Sukuna to shut up tho
FingerLickinGood: night!!
Stabby: good night!
Shopaholic: gn
SugarRush: good night!!!
[Everyone is offline]
[Chaos Family]
[6:12 AM]
FingerLickinGood: guys is it normal to fall out of a skyscraper while fighting curses
HardcoreGoth: wtf no???
SugarRush: totally!
FingerLickinGood: I TOLD U SO NOBARA
Shopaholic: HOW ARE U ALIVE THATS NOT NORMAL
FingerLickinGood: I DIDNT EVEM BREAK ANY BONES SO ITS OKAY
SugarRush: lmao
HardcoreGoth: ur a teacher?? U should not be enabling this???
SugarRush: I’d fallen out of plenty of buildings when I was ur age!!!
Shopaholic: “when I was ur age”
Shopaholic: ur so old lol
SugarRush: u guys are so mean to me :((
HardcoreGoth: then stop acting like an old man
FingerLickinGood: yea!
HardcoreGoth: oh u haven’t gotten out of this so easily Mr I-didn’t-even-break-any-bones
FingerLickinGood: fuck
SugarRush: oh ur not out of trouble either Megumi!!!
HardcoreGoth: ???
SugarRush: I’ve been told how many times u tried to summon mahoraga:))
HardcoreGoth: shit
Shopaholic: LMAOO THATS WHAT U GET FOR BEING STUPID
[Tuna is online]
Tuna: why r u guys spamming the chat so early in the morning
SugarRush: bc Megumi and Yuji are being suicidal!!
SugarRush: And um idk that’s not healthy ig?
Tuna: sensei u are literally built like a fucking paintbrush u cannot be talking
Shopaholic: fr do u not eat??
FingerLickinGood: LMFAOO
FingerLickinGood: rare moment of inumaki being able to spell 😲😲🫵
Tuna: LEABVE ME ALONE
Shopaholic: there it is!!
HardcoreGoth: keep talking about his health and ur gonna summon Ieri-san
SugarRush: this is bullying >_<
[Workaholic is online]
Workaholic: What is this.
SugarRush: Nanamin!! :D
Workaholic: No.
SugarRush: T-T
FingerLickinGood: hi nanamin!!
Workaholic: Hello.
Shopaholic: omg do u really with proper punctuation
Workaholic: Why would I not?
SugarRush: oh that’s terrifying
Workaholic: If it will get you away from me then that’s fine by me.
SugarRush: so mean :((
SugarRush: omg these fuckers can’t go five minutes without me I gtg deal with some bitches
SugarRush: byeeeeeeeeeeeee <3333
[SugarRush is offline]
HardcoreGoth: I’m pretty sure he left mostly because we started questioning his health
[Makiroll is online]
Makiroll: did I just hear sensei scream “these fucking bastards are the real reason I have white hair” at six in the morning??
HardcoreGoth: that too ig
HardcoreGoth: Just get back so Ieiri-san can make sure ur fine Yuji
FingerLickinGood: ok!!