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Ice King and the Three Creepers

Summary:

After "It Came From the Nightosphere", Ice King gets visited by the freaky tongue monster that was sucking souls before and Gunter chases it off.

Or a crown, the lord of the Nightosphere, and the most evil thing he's ever encountered fight over the affections of an amnesiac antiquarian.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Ice King hid in his shower after the tongue monster showed up to wash off completely voluntarily soiling himself and stayed there for some time afterwards. The water was really, really hot and somehow, that helped. It reminded him of

(red-sheeted bed, and the shower before had washed off months of wandering, and fat beads of water dotted his thighs and rolled down his back as he put on the borrowed suit jacket)

something nice.

He squawked when something knocked on the door. "Gunter, not now!"

"It's not Gunter. It's me," said the voice. It took Ice King a moment to recognize it as the tongue monster. He flattened against the wall.

"Go away!"

"I want to apologize first." Ice King slammed off the water and pawed for his crown; where on the counter had he put it? "I know you don't remember me, but scaring you was unwarranted. I was upset because of my little girl fighting with me and because...well, I didn't want to eat your soul."

Ice King paused, his hand hovering over his crown. "Why not? Isn't my soul good enough?"

Silence. Then: "If you had stayed, then, maybe we could have raised Marceline properly instead of her running away from me. A king's as good as a princess, isn't he?"

Ice King thought of red sheets and bit his lip. Had he heard what he thought he had? He idly put his hand on the crown and -

 

 

 

 

 

 

What had he been thinking about?

He batted at the cotton in his brain until he caught something solid. "Are you saying you only eat princess's souls? That's not fair! I got here first."

The voice said something unintelligible; footsteps trailed away.

Ice King dressed quickly, came out of the bathroom to the smell of sulfur and distant noise. He followed them until he heard the tonguemonster.

" - summoned me to gloat? Is that it? To show that he's forgotten me and lavishes attention on you!"

Gunter wenked. Ice King thought of something small, black haired, defenseless, and started to run.

He came in to the tongue monster punting Gunter away again. Gunter caught Ice King square in the stomach, and fell on his butt catching him. The tongue monster stared at them both; the gap in the wall, radiating orange light and heat, made his face unreadable. The spirit monsters flocked toward the glowing hole, and others poked their misshaped heads through. "Ice King's in trouble," he mumbled, and looked back to check that he had a straight hallway to fly away down, clutching Gunter. He had to get away, he had to get away, he had to get away -

The tongue monster said, "Goodbye, Simon. I hope you do remember one day, and get rid of those things while you're at it," and hissed at - Gunter? Ice King was sure he hissed at Gunter. What other thing could he have meant?

Gunter made a rude gesture back. The tongue monster rolled his eyes, turned away and walked into the gap in the wall.

Ice King clutched Gunter until it closed up and took the flocking spirits with it. Gunter wenked and snuggled into his chest. The few remaining spirit monsters avoided Gunter, as usual; Ice King relaxed, rubbing his face on the slick feathers. "That was a close one, wasn't it?" Gunter wenked again. "Yes, yes, you're sleepy. I guess I can read you a story."

He stood up cradling Gunter. For some reason, he felt like spoiling his penguins tonight. Gunter nuzzled his chest, and Ice King rocked him as he walked.

By the time he finished "King Worm and the Dogs," he had forgotten how his heart had stuttered at "Simon."

Notes:

I subscribe to the theory that Simon helped Marceline and her dad reunite before he went completely crown-crazy, and that Hunson and Simon became friends at that time. Even if Ice King doesn't remember, Hunson does and thus doesn't eat his soul!

...and if you're already going mad and doing skeevy stuff to survive in a post-apocalyptic world, taking up your demon friend's offer of a one night stand at his cushy mansion before you completely lose it is a pretty awesome idea.