Work Text:
Getting tired from all this circling
Not much grace left on a broken wing
I feel the wind trying to push me down
It happens every time I get to town
Of course it would rain on a night like tonight.
The relentless raindrops smashed against the windshield of his truck, causing his right foot to ease up off the gas pedal, and his grip on the steering wheel to tighten just a touch.
Every muscle in his neck tensed as he skillfully maneuvered through the city streets he could navigate blindfolded, hoping that he would hear the needed ping on his phone that might just save him. He needed saving. Here he was, seeking out answers, but there was only one who could truly provide those, and she hadn’t called. If he hadn’t been pulled in every direction at work all day, the silence might have swallowed him whole.
The rain roared even harder as it came at his truck sideways, mirroring the maelstrom swirling inside him. It's not that he wanted to be driving an extra twenty minutes in the rain, but he wasn't quite ready to face the alternative that was waiting in the other direction.
Home.
Because two possibilities awaited him: that she would be there, exactly where she was meant to be, or that she wouldn't.
Both terrified him to his core.
I search for shelter near the mines we swept
I guess forgiveness hasn't happened yet
There are no words that I can say to you
That turn this careless sky from black to blue
So I'm asking you
It was a nondescript Friday evening. There were no anniversaries, birthdays, or anything else significant. That was the beauty of it. She’d never see it coming. Well, if Tim was being honest, he had a feeling she could see it coming. It wasn’t as if they hadn’t had their fill of “forever” discussions. Lucy likely had no doubt Tim was going to ask her to marry her at some point, and he had no doubt she would say yes. The ring had been selected weeks ago, a delicate setting that had practically shouted at him from the jewelry case with all of its “Lucyness”. It was perfect for her, and tonight was the night he was going to see it on her finger for the first time.
If he hadn't been so focused on creating a perfect evening, he might have sensed the shift sooner.
He had been ready to meet Lucy outside the locker room when he got a text.
Got pulled into a meeting in Grey's office. Go on to the restaurant and I'll meet you there. I'll be right behind you. Love you.
He was relieved. Now he could get to the restaurant early and make sure their table was in an optimal location. Even though he wasn't actually proposing at dinner, he still wanted it to be as romantic as possible. Afterward, he would drive her up to Griffith Observatory, her favorite view of the city, and propose to her there.
Once he was seated at their table, his cop eyes took over as he did a sweep of the restaurant, taking it all in. They would be situated near a window, far from the restrooms and kitchen, near enough to a speaker so Lucy could be able to identify every song that played, inevitably sing along, and most likely quiz him on the titles in the process.
He had expected to be a walking bundle of nerves, but all that engulfed him was a sense of calm.
Tim prided himself on being a confident man, but there were multiple points in his life he’d found himself questioning his circumstances.
Why had Tom Bradford ever become a parent?
Were he and Isabel ever meant to be together?
Should he have stayed on patrol as long as he did?
But not once had he ever questioned Lucy, or how much she meant to him. They fit so perfectly together, literally and figuratively, that it astounded him sometimes, particularly in those quiet moments in bed when he felt the gentle rise and fall of her breath as she lay on his chest, her hair draped over him, softer than any blanket.
His instinctive Lucy radar pinged then, and looking over he saw her walking past the window, giving him an excited little wave once their eyes found each other.
She beelined it to the table, draped in a deep plum wrap dress with her curls looking more voluminous than normal.
“Hey, babe!” she greeted excitedly, giving him a peck as she sat down.
“You look stunning. You put yourself together at the station that fast?”
“I’ve learned a few tricks over the years. Plus, when you suggested this place I knew I had to glam it up a little. You chose well, Tim. This is gorgeous! But why so fancy tonight?”
He shrugged, taking a sip of water to help feign nonchalance. “Just wanted to mix it up a little. Let’s face it, Luce, most of our date nights are at a food truck or we just end up seeing a movie.”
“Mix it up? Who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend?’”
“Just a guy who wants his girlfriend to be happy.”
“Tim,” she said quietly, taking his hand. “You know it doesn’t matter where we go. I love our food truck nights because I’m with you.”
“I know. Now shut up and enjoy your fancy night.”
Lucy giggled as she picked up the menu.
As they perused the menus, and the waiter took their orders, Tim resisted the urge to check that the ring was still in his pocket. He knew it was there. He was not going to become one of those guys who had to check it every five seconds and gave themselves away before they could get on one knee.
Except it was getting harder not to just propose to her right there on the spot. She kept looking at him with such a blinding smile it took his breath away every time. He could still sometimes scarcely believe she was his.
He needed to keep his mind occupied.
“So, I take it the meeting with Grey went well? You’ve hardly stopped smiling since you got here.”
“Right! The meeting! Well, there is a need for someone to go undercover long-term to infiltrate a massive drug cartel. I could end up in a few locations, a couple out of town. Several officers, including Sergeant Murray, whom I worked with before, recommended me for the op.”
Not again.
It had been months since she’d been on an op, and before that, it was a stint here and there, usually no more than a couple of days. But he could’ve sworn her enthusiasm had diminished each time. He’d see it in her exhausted eyes and in her relief at being back in his arms. She barely brought UC up anymore since settling in nicely with the detectives. The work there kept her plenty busy and he figured maybe she’d grown tired of going undercover. When she backed off of UC of course he was relieved, but being with her was inevitable regardless.
This was probably Harper’s fault, always keeping an ear out for UC rumblings.
“H-how long?” he asked, barely getting the words out as his mouth had gone dry.
“At least a year, maybe longer.”
Tim felt as if he was being swallowed up by an inky blackness. No, this was not happening. Not now. Not when they are right on the cusp of starting the next chapter of their lives. Wasn’t the universe rooting for them? That’s what Lucy always said anyway, and he’d started to believe it himself. How could he propose now, knowing they would be apart for an entire year? How could they plan a wedding if they couldn’t even be in communication with each other?!
Tim ran his hand across his cheek, feeling his frustration slowly build to a boil. How could she sit there across from him looking so calm and serene? Didn’t she care about being away from him? Didn’t she understand this would destroy their dreams?
He wants to be married in a year, not going to bed alone every night worrying about whether she’s even alive.
He can’t do this.
“What was your decision?” He heard the hardness in his voice but made no attempt to mask it.
Her eyes widened. “I told them I needed a day to think it over, but I was interested. I mean, I’m honored they sought me out for such a significant op. I knew I needed to discuss it with you first, but you’ve always been suppor–”
“Lucy.” He covered his face with his hands.
He felt a soft hand on his arm, but it brought him no comfort.
“Tim, I know it’s a lot, but we can handle it.”
“No.”
He immediately felt the absence of her hand as he finally looked directly at her.
“What?”
“No, Lucy. Tell them no, not this time.”
“Since when do you make my decisions for me?” she asked defensively.
“Since you’re willing to leave for a damn year!” he hissed. He stood, feeling slightly unhinged. “Look, we don’t need to hash this out here. Let’s go home.”
“What about the food? I’m starving.”
“I’m not hungry anymore. If you need to stay and eat, go ahead, but I’m leaving.”
He pulled out a handful of bills from his money clip and found the waiter to settle the bill. As he reached the door, he took one more glance at Lucy, who was staring back at him, mouth still agape.
Heading for his truck, he inwardly pleaded for her to follow him. Come home with me, baby.
Tim could feel tears stinging his eyes as he climbed in. He left the keys out of the ignition and just sat in silence for a few minutes, the only noise coming from other cars pulling into the parking lot, and happy patrons heading inside the restaurant. Ten minutes ago, he was one of them.
How had this night become unraveled so fast, frayed edges and all? They were supposed to have a fantastic meal and then soak in the views of the city. He’d get down on one knee as he choked through the words he wanted to say, she’d have happy tears as she said yes, and they’d go home to call their loved ones and tell them the good news, followed by a full night of lovemaking.
All of it was snuffed out in a moment.
The Lucy he knew wasn’t this cavalier with a decision this weighty. There had to be more to it than meets the eye. How was this something she genuinely wanted? Was it that easy for her to leave him? He never used to think so, but now….
Of course, everyone tended to leave him eventually. But Lucy had always, always, been his exception.
A swish of hair caught his eye as he turned and spotted Lucy walking to her car, her hand swiping her cheek.
Exhaling his relief, he started the truck and began the trek toward their house.
Is it safe, is it safe to land?
"Cause I'm not going to fall on an empty heart
Is it safe, is it safe to land?
'Cause the long fall back to earth is the hardest part
Tim pulled into the driveway alone, Lucy having caught a stoplight a ways back. As he got out of the truck, his feet felt like bricks. The dread of this conversation washed over him as he made his way inside and let Kojo out in the yard.
Could this actually break them?
He hadn’t thought that was possible before now. They had such an unshakeable foundation, so many life-or-death situations, so many deep moments, with so much friendship built up before they ever had their first date. Tim figured nothing could rip them apart. And he had prepared himself for her UC ops as well. He knew that was part of the deal.
But a year?
He just wasn’t so sure anymore his heart could survive that one. Not when her engagement ring burned a hole in his pocket.
Not when he was addicted to her presence.
Not when he knew how every inch of her felt and tasted.
Not when every morning at the moment they parted for their shifts, he felt his heart leaving with her instead of staying with him.
He saw her headlights briefly illuminate the house that remained dimly lit. He heard the slamming of the car door. He took note of her angry footsteps as she burst inside, her eyes red-rimmed and wild.
“How could you just leave like that, Tim?” she cried.
“I just didn’t want us to make a scene at the restaurant, that’s all. We’re home now. We can talk it out here.”
She marched past him into the living room, leaving him to follow, her arms in gestures he recognized as attempts to calm herself. He could hear her attempting to slow her breathing down. “Fine, let’s talk. Ever since I started undercover work, you have always supported me. You may not have liked it, but you supported my interest in it. I know it’s been hard before, but you’ve never just given up on me like that. That hurt,” she said, jabbing her index finger into his chest.
Tim sighed. Now she thought he didn’t support her, which couldn’t be further from the truth. He wanted her to pursue everything she set out to do because he knew anything she went after she would execute brilliantly. It was the timing, the here and now. And he couldn’t help feeling selfish for wanting to keep her with him. But how selfish was it to simply want to make things official with the love of your life?
And how could he convey all of that without giving away his plans?
“Luce, I support you. You know that. But this op is a lot. It’s a bigger commitment than you’ve ever done before.”
“This is what I’ve trained for. It’s an adjustment but I know the risks. Do you-do you think I’m not capable enough?” she asked, her voice suddenly small.
“Never,” he emphasized. “You’re more than capable. But you don’t seem too affected by the fact that we would hardly have any contact with each other. Are you telling me you’d be perfectly content with us being away from each other for a year?”
“No, it would be hard. I’m not denying that. But I have a job to do, and you know how important that is.”
His hands gripped the back of their couch, the supple leather not nearly enough to ground him at the moment. “You don’t have to do this particular job. You can walk away from it. Take the next one that comes along, but let this one go…please.”
“And what happened to not letting anyone tell me I can’t do something? All of a sudden, you decide to be a hypocrite!”
Tim stared at her with fire in his eyes. “A hypocrite?! How dare you, Lucy? Have I ever gone back on my word? I’m not forcing you to do anything. We both know you would never accept that. I’m suggesting a different choice because I can’t bear the idea of you being gone for that long! It’s killing me, Lucy. And the fact that it doesn’t seem to faze you the same way makes me question your commitment to us!”
He was yelling. He was yelling words that tasted like poison coming out of his mouth. No, that wasn’t what he wanted to say. Was he questioning her commitment? He didn’t know he even had seeds of doubt until they were suddenly sprouting out of nowhere. Her love had been the most sure and steady force in his life, and it still was. He was probably just losing his mind.
She sank onto the couch, head in her hands, and Tim began to feel himself slowly crack into a million pieces. They weren’t getting out of this unscathed.
He barely heard her whisper, her voice clogged with emotion, “What the hell, Tim?”
“I-I didn’t–”
“You did. Somewhere deep down, you doubt how much I love you. Do you honestly think it wouldn’t kill me to be away from you? Do you think I wouldn’t think about you constantly, that it wouldn’t tear me up not knowing if you’re okay?”
“Then why? Why are you choosing this path?”
She wrung her hands, and it occurred to Tim that there might be more churning inside her besides an actual desire just to do undercover work.
“It’s…it’s important work. But you’re important, too.”
But was he important enough? An uncharacteristic fear clawed at his heart. What if Lucy decided this was all too much, and she needed to be young and free and go live her life?
Maybe he'd been foolish to think this beautiful domesticity they’d created together was enough to combat the lure of undercover thrills.
He sank next to her, taking her hand even though he couldn’t quite look at her. “I don’t know that I have any answers here. These are our lives, Luce. How many years together do we really get? I’m already in my forties, and I want as much of our future as I can have with you. I don’t want to push a pause button on this. I thought we were on the same page about that, but now….”
Feeling more pressure on his hand as she squeezed, he heard, “Are you saying you can’t be with me if I do this?”
He felt the bile rise in his throat at just the thought, but he also didn’t know how they proceeded if she was dead set on going.
“I don’t know what I’m saying right now, Luce. I think we need time to at least process this a little more, which we don’t have.”
If she was resolute in doing this, there would be no path for him that didn’t involve feeling like his heart had been shredded to pieces. Whether they broke up or stayed together, he would worry about her regardless. He would yearn for her. He would miss her terribly, and be consumed with all this love that had no outlet.
Walking away from the best thing that ever happened to him would in no way protect his heart. It would only destroy it.
He was screwed.
There was a resignation in his posture as he stood, shoving his hands in his pockets. “And anyway, it sounds like you’ve already made up your mind.”
“I-I haven’t yet. Tim–”
“You should go on the op, Lucy.”
He winced, feeling the déjà vu regarding a different conversation back in the hallway to her old apartment, his eyes near tears as he’d told her to go to UC school and move on. That night he’d walked away feeling like what they had was permanently broken.
Only it wasn’t, and they’d gotten past that broken feeling. It hadn’t taken long before each other’s magnetic pull was too strong to keep them apart.
Was that pull just as strong now?
He could see the fresh tears forming in her eyes and hated himself for being the cause of them.
Standing as well, she put her hands on his chest. “No, don’t you dare do this! Don’t you shut down on me! You are not going to put your walls back up and keep me out. You’ve never done that since we got together.”
“Well, what do you want from me, then? I’ve done everything in my power to support your UC career, even when it hurts! If you need to go, I can’t stop you. I don’t understand it, and if there’s something else going on here, I wish you would tell me.”
“I just…I just need to do my job, Tim. You of all people know how much that matters.”
Some things matter more.
She mattered more. They mattered more.
Lucy took a step back from him. “Are we…are we ok?”
Tim shrugged. “I don’t know.”
The silence kept them frozen, until Lucy quietly said, “I’m going to go stay with Tamara tonight.”
What?
He should’ve taken an extra beat, but his head and heart were so exhausted that he had no filter left, and muttered, “Now who’s the one leaving?”
She glared at him. “That’s not what’s happening! I’m putting this discussion on pause so we can clear our heads, ok?”
He heard the sincerity in her voice and let it slide. “Yeah. Yeah, ok.”
She went straight to the bedroom to gather some essentials and was packed in record time. Tim remained in the same spot, wondering if the floor might just swallow him whole.
Lucy exited the bedroom a few minutes later, let Kojo back in, gave him kisses, and with a heavy sigh made her way to the door.
He knew she was right; they needed to clear their heads before they uttered anything that they couldn’t come back from, but as angry and frustrated as he was, he still didn’t want her to go.
“Luce….” He called out as her hand reached the doorknob. There was so much he needed to convey, but words failed him.
She turned, her face softening for a moment. “I know, Tim. I know.”
And she was gone.
I'm in no weather for apologies
I need your runway lights to burn for me
And if you say that I can come around
I will love you right, yeah I won't let you down
I won't let you down
'Cause I'm coming home, if these wheels touch down
It had been the most fitful sleep he’d had in ages. Tim’s restlessness had transferred to Kojo, the poor pup continuously moving around the empty Lucy-shaped side of the bed, clearly curious as to her whereabouts. All Tim could do was give him a loving pat on his head and attempt sleep once more.
As if the universe hadn’t already crapped on him enough, he cut himself shaving while his thoughts drifted to Lucy, wondering if she’d gotten any rest herself, and what kind of advice Tamara might have given her. She had the day off already, so at least he didn’t need to worry about her being distracted on the job.
He wondered if he might hear the jingling of keys in the front door while he got ready for work. While he certainly didn’t have a clear head yet, maybe she did. Although, it was what she might be clear about that concerned him.
After waiting long enough that he was running behind, he went on to work, forgoing his usual stop at Bill’s Coffee truck, settling for whatever substance the breakroom coffeemaker chose to concoct today.
It’s not that he was trying to be snippy with everyone, but he found himself feeling increasingly unmoored throughout the day. It was right after he’d barked out an answer to Clark and Harris when Angela burst into his office.
“What’s up with you?” she asked, without preamble.
“Nothing,” he answered, his voice laced with a calm he didn’t feel.
“Cut the crap. I’ve heard hushed whispers all day about how you’re on the warpath, which we all know isn’t your normal MO anymore. So spill.”
He stared at his desk. “It’s just a bad day, that’s all.”
Angela shuffled closer to his desk and sat on the edge. “Tim.”
Her gentle tone got his attention, and he glanced up. Her nosy detective persona had vanished, leaving his concerned best friend staring back at him.
“I…I don’t know if I can talk about it right now.”
“Are you able to talk to Lucy about it?”
He shook his head. “Not exactly.”
Angela nodded as she stood. “Well, I can’t force you, but if you want to come by later tonight to talk things out, I’ll be around. Wesley was going to take the kids to see Patrice for a little while anyway. Whatever this is, you don’t need to let it fester.”
Tim gave a curt nod in acknowledgment and she left just as quickly as she’d come.
It’s how he found himself about to pull out of the station a few hours later, debating which direction to turn as the unexpected rain picked up. Right would take him home, and maybe Lucy had returned home already. Left would take him to the Lopez-Evers house. As self-reliant as he’d always prided himself on being, right now, he needed a friend.
Left it was.
When he arrived after battling the storm, Angela greeted him with a towel. “It's about time you showed up.”
Taking the towel and giving her his thanks, they settled on the couch. It barely took any prodding from Angela before words were spilling out of Tim, everything at the restaurant and their subsequent argument.
“I just feel like no matter what happens I’m going to lose her,” he concluded.
Angela looked deep in thought for a moment, then leaned in a little closer. “Mind if I speak bluntly?”
“You always do.”
“I think that’s crap. Look, I’ve never seen a bond quite like what the two of you have. I mean, you and Isabel were deeply in love, but you and Lucy are on a whole different level. Everything you both went through together created this…I don’t even know what to call it. You finish each other’s sentences. You can have entire conversations without saying a word. You just get each other. This is only a minor setback, and you’ll figure out a solution because you always do.”
“Ange, you didn’t see the hurt on her face. She thinks I don’t support her anymore, and that I doubt her love for me.”
“Do you?”
“Of course not! I just don’t understand what’s driving her to go. I’ve been wanting that sense of permanence with her, and we’ve talked about our future before plenty of times. I thought we were on the same page, but maybe Lucy needs more freedom.”
“Or maybe she didn’t have a clue you were trying to propose and this is all just bad timing. Plus I’m not so sure she’s dead set on going. It sounds like there’s more underneath the surface. Now, you may not have the best detective skills,” she paused, earning an eye roll from Tim. “But you should still investigate that.”
“Am I out of line here? Am I a hypocrite like she called me?”
Angela shook her head. “No, Tim. You’re a guy who is in love and who wants to be with that person. This would be an issue for any couple, except it’s not a normal issue at all. And you’re not a hypocrite. Lucy always talks about how supportive you are. She calls you her biggest cheerleader.”
Tim warmed at the thought, although they would definitely need to discuss a different title for him.
“I’ve always wanted her to have a successful career, UC or not. I knew it would come into play when I chose to be with her, but I think I got a false sense of security that maybe she wasn’t that interested in it anymore. I don’t want to be the reason she can’t focus on her op, and I don’t want to be the reason she walks away from it, either.”
“I think when you get down to it, there’s one important question to ask yourself here. Whether she goes on this op or not, whether you get to propose or not, are you willing to walk away from her?”
The moment the words left her mouth he knew the answer with every thread of his soul. As the answer grew bigger inside of him, the fear and worry started to quiet, becoming merely echoes.
“I could never walk away from her, ever.”
Angela smiled. “Then fight, Tim. Fight for what you have together. You can make this work.”
Tim nodded, ashamed he let so much cowardice define his day. It wasn’t too late for them, at least, he hoped it wasn’t. His need to see Lucy overpowered him as he stood up.
“You’re right. I need to find her…now.”
“Good. And by the way, I can’t believe you were going to propose and not even tell your best friend in advance!” she said, punching him in the arm.
“Relax, nobody knew, not even Tamara. And I’m glad I didn’t tell anyone, or everybody would’ve been calling and texting last night after our fight!”
“Well, don’t let it happen again. I expect a phone call right after the ring goes on her finger.”
Tim pulled Angela into a hug. Not their norm, but it was what he needed at that moment. “Thanks.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
On his way to his truck, he noticed the rain had stopped, leaving only puddles glistening under the streetlights as evidence. Maybe their storm would be over, too. He felt a resolve inside of him that he’d never felt quite like this.
He headed for home, where he hoped that’s where she’d returned, no matter what decision she had on the tip of her tongue. She needed to be where she belonged, where they could lay all their cards on the table, and reach a solution to all of this mess.
And if she wasn’t there, he’d race over to her old apartment and not leave until they worked something out.
Please be home, Lucy.
It was his deepest exhale in twenty-four hours when he turned the corner to his street and could see her car in the driveway, the living room light left on like a beacon for him.
“Lucy?” he called out as he entered, but he was only met with silence.
When he reached the bedroom, he found her asleep in their bed, Kojo making little grunt-like snores at her feet. The outline of her curves tucked under their blankets was the most beautiful sight he'd ever seen.
She was here. She was home.
He hated to wake her, but this couldn’t wait a second longer. Tim sat next to her on the bed, and with a gentle tug on her arm, she slowly opened her eyes, those expressive eyes that had captivated him from day one. If he had to wait months or a year to see those eyes again, it would all still be worth it.
"Hi, baby," he whispered.
I'm coming home
I'm waking you up
In the middle of the night I'm not giving up
I'm gonna stay, 'til we make it work
We're not going down even if it gets worse
We'll work it out, yeah we'll work it out
I need your light, guide me in
Her bleariness seemed to instantly vanish once she spotted who had awakened her, and she scrambled out of the covers to reach him and fall into his arms. He felt as if they were molten pieces of glass being melted together into one, not knowing where one began or ended.
“You’re home,” she said, her voice still thick with sleep.
“You’re home,” he whispered back, threading his fingers through her hair.
She pulled back to look at him. “Where were you?” There was nothing accusatory in her tone, just mere curiosity.
“With Angela. I needed a sounding board.”
“Good. I’m glad you got that.” She paused, biting her bottom lip. “Babe, I’m not going.”
“Lucy, no, I reacted too strongly last night. I won’t stand in your way from going. I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait as long as it takes. I’m sorry if I made you think otherwise. I don’t want to hold you back.”
“If I go I’m holding myself back. I want us, our future. And you don’t have to apologize for your feelings.”
Lucy turned on the bedside lamp and sat up a little more, gently cupping his cheeks. “I was feeling everything you were. It was tearing me up. So I talked with Tamara some, and then tossed and turned all night not able to sleep. I hate not sleeping with you. I hated this weight on me. But I looked at this from every angle, and ultimately I had to turn it down. I already talked to Grey, it’s done. I will not be doing any long-term UC ops from here on out. And it’s my decision, Tim, mine. You are not holding me back. You never have.”
Her words coated his heart with peace. He’d needed to hear that. All he’d ever wanted was for her to thrive. He remembered how Isabel had told him she felt she had to live up to his standards, and while he never intended that to be the case, he was also determined never to make Lucy feel that way. “As long as it’s completely your decision, I’ll back you up one hundred percent. I love you, so much I can’t see straight sometimes, and might act a little crazy. I’m sorry.”
“I love you, too. I never want you to doubt my love again.”
“That wasn’t it, Lucy. It was my insecurities I was fighting, because I couldn’t understand your motive for leaving. I thought maybe what we’d created wasn’t enough for you anymore, because of me. But your love is the only thing I was holding onto.”
“It’s enough, Tim. It’s more than enough, I promise. I’m sorry you ever had to wonder about that.”
“Baby, what was your motive for going? I know there’s something you weren’t telling me last night.”
Lucy took a deep breath. “The thing is, work has felt a little stagnant lately, and I don’t know why. I haven’t exactly missed UC or anything, but I’ve just been coasting. When Grey told me about this op, I felt like maybe I needed to shake things up again. I have all this training, and I’m great at what I do. I’ve made a name for myself in this field, and people expect this from me. I thought I didn’t have much of a choice.”
“You always have a choice, Lucy.”
“You’re right, and the more I thought it over, the more I realized that UC wasn’t the answer anymore. When I first started going undercover, I didn’t have much reason to stay. I could afford to be a little reckless. But now, I have a family, one I have no intention of losing. And yes, my career is important. But there will be other opportunities. There’s only one Tim Bradford, and there is no way I’m letting him go,” she said as she wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him closer.
“I was never that set on going, anyway. I was thrilled to be considered, but leaving you would have killed me. But then you got mad and dug your heels in so I did, too.”
He leaned his forehead against hers, breathing her in.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too.”
“Heaven help our kids who get a double dose of stubbornness,” Tim said with a small chuckle.
“So you’re saying you still want kids?”
“I want everything with you. We are still worth the risk, no matter where are careers take us, even if you decide you still want UC again down the road. I’m not walking away from us.”
“Good. So, do you think we’ve apologized enough times yet?”
Tim laughed, relishing how good it felt after such a heavy day.
He had the ring in his pocket, transferring it to whatever he was wearing since the night before, clinging to it all day as if it were a talisman.
“By the way, It wasn’t so much that I was mad at you. I was mad at the timing. It was just unbelievably bad timing, because I was going to ask you about a different potential op last night, and your announcement just threw it off.”
Lucy’s head tilted in intrigue. “Wait, what kind of op?”
“Becoming my wife.”
Lucy’s hands flew to her mouth as Tim got down on one knee on the side of the bed, and pulled out the box he’d been itching to give her for so long. He heard her utter a small squeak as he opened it.
“This isn’t exactly what I had planned, but I don’t want to wait any longer. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, Lucy. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I want the next chapter in our story to start as soon as possible. So, baby, will you marry me?”
She nodded emphatically, the tears beginning to spill as her grin lit up the room. “Yes, absolutely, Tim!”
Tim sprang back up to gently slide the ring on her finger, then pulled her in for a hungry kiss, eager to feel her as close as possible. Lucy was clearly of the same mindset as she slid her hands under his shirt, running them along his back.
“Looks like we have some serious making-up to do to celebrate,” Lucy said once they pulled apart, panting heavily.
Tim let out a low growl. “You have no idea. But first, Angela deserves a phone call, and a few others as well.”
Lucy grabbed her phone from the nightstand. “Can I do the honors?” she asked excitedly, taking a second to admire her ring.
Tim smiled and kissed her forehead. “Have at it.”
As he watched his fiancée animatedly share the exciting news with their family and friends, a warm, settled feeling began to bloom in his chest. Challenges would always be part of their relationship, but he knew with more certainty than ever before, that they would always find a way to work through them. Their love would always bring each other back home.