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Summary
Dwarrow women were rare- to the point that they could refuse kings their pleasure, where the men could not.
During the quest in a company full of his cousins and nephews, Thorin Oakenshield decides to take pleasure in their burglar- a creature soft enough that Thorin can pretend the hips he grasp in the dark belong to a feminine creature.
Bilbo Baggins doesn’t mind so much, being bed by a king of dwarves on the regular. She’s not as fond of bumming as he seems to be, but as long as no children come from it, it’s all just good fun innit? Still, it would have been nice if he’d asked first. Also, if they ever did it somewhere she could actually take her pants all the way off, that’d be nice.