Work Text:
1.
“For someone who claims to dislike these challenges so much, you sure seem to walk by the Dango Shop when Gai’s there often. I thought the Copy Ninja was more skilled at evasion…”
Asuma’s teasing words from a few weeks ago come to Kakashi’s mind as Gai rushes to accost him before he can continue walking past the shop.
So what if he always seems to walk by whenever Gai is treating himself to dango? And so what if this is when Gai usually seizes the opportunity to challenge him? It’s all coincidence.
“Kakashi! It’s your turn to choose the challenge! What hot-blooded battle of strength and courage will put our rivalry to the test today?”
Kakashi lowers his copy of Icha-Icha, giving Gai a compulsory eye roll and sigh. “Is it really necessary to do this right now, Gai?”
“Of course, it’s necessary!” Cue the most dramatic pose Gai has in his arsenal; a shaking fist raised in the air, eyes pinched shut and his face upturned. “It has been two weeks since our last fated battle! We must stoke the flames of our rivalry before the cold waters of time can snuff them out forever!”
“…Right,” Kakashi isn’t even going to ask what he means by that.
“Okay, then,” Kakashi makes a show of deliberating while Gai eagerly awaits his choice, bouncing on his toes and sporting a wide smile. It’s somehow annoying and endearing all at once. Much like everything Gai does.
“I choose….” he starts, watching carefully for the reaction Gai is sure to have. “Arm wrestling.”
His face falls, shifting from excited to frustrated in an instant. “Argghh, Kakashi! You picked arm wrestling the last five times it was your turn to choose. Today’s challenge will determine who takes the lead in our rivalry! This occasion is worthy of a grander battle!”
“I’ve made my decision. Take it or leave it.”
Kakashi doesn’t listen to Gai continue his rant, just suppresses a smirk as he enters the shop and slides into his seat at the little table they always have these arm wrestling matches at. He’s heard every variation of this speech anyway.
Whenever Gai chooses the challenge, he gets Kakashi to do something so ridiculous that he’s sure it makes the two of them look like the village idiots to anyone unfortunate enough to witness the spectacle. Whenever it’s Kakashi’s turn, he picks a challenge so underwhelming that it’s sure to rile Gai up before he begrudgingly accepts.
It’s familiar in a way nothing else in his life is, this routine of theirs. Kakashi is in the Anbu and that means he spends most of his days on edge, bracing for the next event that will rattle his world. Kakashi can take comfort in the fact that this rivalry with Gai offers him stability, something to anchor him when it feels like he’s been spiraling for too long.
Not that he’d ever actually tell Gai that, though.
Gai stops grumbling eventually, stalking over to take his seat on the opposite side of the table. He makes a show of warming up: stretching his arms, cracking his knuckles, doing finger pushups against the wooden surface of the table.
“Fine, I’ll indulge you, Rival. It will be any easy point in my favor.”
“It’s true you’ve won the last few arm wrestling matches, but that doesn’t mean you’re 100% sure to win this one. Who knows, I might surprise you this time.”
“Hmph. Let’s get on with it.”
Gai gets his arm into position, elbow on the table and palm waiting for Kakashi’s. Kakashi slips his hand into Gai’s, his pulse quickening. Gai’s hand grips his tightly and it’s dizzying. He’s hyperaware of the exposed skin of his fingers pressing into the back of Gai’s hand, the surface soft and smooth. He almost wishes his gloves were off so he could know what the rough callouses of Gai’s palm feel like against his own.
The match starts, and Kakashi finds himself having to use most of his strength to fight back, barely keeping them at an equilibrium. His arm begins straining, begging him to relent.
He’s stronger every time we do this
This fact shouldn’t surprise him, but it always manages to. Gai was right that choosing arm wrestling is basically handing him an easy win at this point. Still, Kakashi won’t be counted out so quickly. Contrary to what Gai believes, he takes all their matches seriously.
Besides, the longer he stays in the game, the longer he gets to experience the thrill of Gai’s hand pressing almost violently into his. Kakashi counts that as a win no matter what the result of the match is.
Gai usually waits until the tail end of any battle to unleash his full strength, and Kakashi can see the hints now. Gai’s hand tenses against his and he lets out a quiet grunt, fully concentrated on victory now. Kakashi is a bit ashamed of how weak it makes him.
So weak, that the muscles in his arm momentarily lax enough for Gai to gain the upper hand, pushing Kakashi’s hand dangerously close to the table. Kakashi recovers quickly, barely managing to bring them back to an equilibrium.
“Hah, I’ve got you now, Rival! Just a matter of time.”
Kakashi chances a glance at Gai’s face and notices his eyes hold that glint that appears when he knows he’s near victory. Gai’s eyebrows are scrunched together, and he’s biting into his lower lip the way he does when he’s deep in concentration, and oh, Kakashi’s a goner.
He has the sudden and inexplicable urge to kiss Gai right then and there in the Dango Shop while they’re having the arm wrestling challenge that decides who will be the latest to take the lead in their years-long rivalry.
So, he does.
Kakashi isn’t sure why he does it — no, that’s not true, he knows why. It’s because Gai looks unexplainably hot whenever he’s concentrating and Kakashi has spent years wondering what Gai’s lips would feel like pressed against his. He just doesn’t understand why lately his impulse control seems to completely abandon him whenever he’s within two feet of Gai.
Kakashi launches himself upward as best as he can, knees bent so he won’t hit them on the underside of the table. From this awkward stance he leans over their hands and kisses him.
It’s light, hesitant, but he can feel the heat of Gai’s lips even through his mask and it warms him down to his toes. Gai makes a muffled sound of surprise against him. He seems frozen in place. Neither of them breathes. In a moment of bravery Kakashi presses more insistently and is rewarded by Gai’s lips pressing back.
Gai’s hand goes slack against his. Kakashi slams it into the table. He pulls away.
“Told you I would surprise you,” Kakashi says breathlessly, sitting back down. “I win.”
Gai blinks at him. His mouth opens and closes a few times. He seems to have forgotten how to form words.
Huh. Even his shocked face is cute.
2.
“You could stay the night, if you wish,” Gai whispers in a drowsy voice, lying back against the pillow and shutting his eyes. Gai always falls asleep quickly after sex, offering Kakashi a chance to stay the night before he does. Kakashi never stays, but Gai never fails to offer.
Kakashi glances over at him from where he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, clothes retrieved and getting ready to re-dress. His mouth goes dry as he allows his eyes to rake selfishly over Gai’s body one last time. He takes in the tired, blissful expression on his face. Watches his bare, broad chest rise and fall in time with his breaths. His eyes rove over toned muscle, defined abs, veins slightly bulging in his arms.
Kakashi knows it’s time to look away, but his eyes stay glued to Gai’s body. He feels his stomach clench with desire. He wants more, wants to feel Gai’s arms wrap around him again as they drift off to sleep, bodies fitting perfectly against each other.
As always, that traitorous voice in the back of his head whispers, what would it feel like to wake up to this?
Gai’s strong arms would still be holding him close. Gai would look at him, eyes heavy-lidded, bowl cut messy, his lips stretching into a lazy smile. He would run a hand through Kakashi’s own sleep-mussed hair while greeting him in a soft voice, good morning, Rival.
Kakashi would tighten his own grip on Gai, the corner of his lips tugging up into a small smile. He would lean forward to greet Gai back in the form of a kiss. And they wouldn’t even care about their morning breath, too caught up in how good it feels to hold each other and kiss like they’re making up for dozens of morning kisses they should have already shared. Kakashi can feel his eyelids getting heavy just imagining it…
He takes a deep breath, willing the fantasy to slip away. He feels dangerously close to relenting and staying the night, but it’s a dangerous and selfish thought. A disruption in their usual routine would only complicate things between them. Kakashi forces himself to tear his eyes away from that beautiful body.
He stands and pulls his briefs on, reaching for his pants next. He falters when he hears a sudden deep snore from Gai. Gai snores in his sleep. Kakashi hates hearing people snore. So why does he feel his desire to spend the night intensify tenfold upon hearing this?
Damn it, Gai
Before the rational part of his brain can once again take over and persuade Kakashi to fling himself out of Gai’s window before he makes this terrible decision, he lets impulse take control and abandons his clothes on the floor.
He shuts off the lamp and climbs onto the bed, feeling for Gai’s body in the darkness. Gai sleeps on his back like a corpse, his arms outstretched slightly at his side. It leaves a nice pocket for Kakashi’s body to fit into as he gets settled and lays his head on Gai’s chest. Startled out of his sleep, Gai’s body tenses before seeming to realize that it’s only Kakashi.
Kakashi silently begs him to not say anything about this. He doesn’t want to have to face the consequences of his actions until the morning. Knowing Gai there will be a discussion, and Kakashi is just not mentally equipped to handle such a thing right now.
Luckily, Gai only hums and wraps one arm around Kakashi’s torso, his free hand coming up to card through Kakashi’s hair. It strikes him that he can’t remember the last time he was held like this. Or if anyone had ever held him like this at all.
It feels like a comfort not meant for him; one he doesn’t deserve. Like he’s stealing it. Kakashi tries to focus on how nice it feels but there’s this guilt and it’s cutting deep and maybe this wasn’t a good idea and there’s still time to bolt—
Gai announces he’s asleep again by snoring startlingly loud right next to Kakashi’s ear. The sound of it does something strange to his heart, slows its usual anxious rhythm to a steady beat that makes it so much easier to take in air.
He’s surrounded by Gai’s scent, the sound of his snoring, by arms that grip his body firm and tight like they know Kakashi desperately needs something anchor him. He feels safe. He has never not felt as such, in the presence of this man he trusts with his life.
He allows his body to fully relax against Gai’s — he made his bed; he might as well enjoy lying in it for now.
3.
Naruto bursts through the door holding up a plastic bag of takeout that Kakashi knows can contain nothing other than Ichiraku Ramen, triumphant. “Kakashi-sensei! We brought you lunch today!”
Sakura comes in right after, shaking a fist at him. “Naruto, you idiot! How many times do I have to tell you to keep your voice down when you’re at the hospital?!” Sakura’s other hand clutches another bag of takeout.
“I can’t help it! You know I get excited over Ichiraku!” Naruto pouts.
“That’s not an excuse! And besides, I told you not to get ramen because I was already getting sushi. We got ramen the last three times we bought lunch. Does anything I say ever get through that thick skull of yours?”
“And I told you Kaka-sensei would much rather have the ramen. It’s not possible for anyone to get tired of Ichiraku!”
Sakura is speaking no quieter than Naruto, Kakashi notes as he watches their exchange. He chooses not to comment on the fact and leaves them to their bickering.
He sighs as he turns back to face Gai. “Sorry about these two, Gai. Though I suppose you’re used to this by now, aren’t you?”
Naruto and Sakura have taken to visiting twice a week bearing lunch for the three of them. The room doesn’t seem quite so lifeless when they visit, and Kakashi’s heart doesn’t feel as heavy. He likes to think Gai enjoys their company as well.
Gai doesn’t answer him because he’s still lying on the hospital bed asleep. It’s what Kakashi likes to think of it as. It’s not as scary as the word “coma.” Gai has just been taking the world’s longest nap for the past few months, but he’ll wake up soon. Kakashi believes that with a surety he can’t explain.
“…right, Kakashi-sensei?” Sakura’s voice pulls him from his thoughts.
“What was that?”
“Well, which would you rather have? Sushi or ramen?”
They both stare at him impatiently, awaiting his answer. Kakashi can’t help the smile that forms under his mask. He marvels at the way he’s finally able to put a name to the fondness he feels for his team. He loves them — and he feels the urge to say it.
“I’m perfectly fine with either option. Thank you for bringing me lunch. I love you both.”
Their faces immediately twist into mirror expressions of disgust. Sakura clutches her chest as if she’s been wounded. Naruto doubles over as if he’s about to hurl.
“Ah, c’mon, could you stop saying gross things like that? It’s creepy coming from you,” Naruto groans.
“I miss when you used to tell us you hated us,” Sakura laments.
“You know, it would make your dear old sensei’s heart happy if you told him you love him, too.”
“Not a chance,” Sakura says at the same time Naruto says, “I’d rather throw myself into the river.”
“That’s alright. I still really love you guys.”
Kakashi says it teasingly now, but he means it. It took almost losing everyone he had left to become brave enough to say those simple words. And it’s so easy now that it feels silly how it used to be impossible. Ever since that day on the battlefield when he’d first let them slip past his lips, he’s not able to repress them.
“I think I’m going to be sick,” Naruto says at the same time Sakura says, “I gotta get out of here.”
They rush out of the room, abandoning both bags of takeout on the floor. Naruto must be extra freaked out to leave behind a perfectly good bowl of ramen. Kakashi must’ve laid on the aloof act pretty thick over the years for the two of them to act so disgusted over his blatant declarations of love. Oh well, they’d better get used to it.
“So much for having lunch together,” he turns back to Gai, still smiling fondly. “If I remember correctly, you told me years ago that those brats would sneak their way into my heart one day. I’ll concede this point. I really do love them. I should have told them a long time ago.”
He brushes the hair from Gai’s forehead and places a kiss on one of the scars lining it. “There were so many times I wanted to say it to you, but I stopped myself, thinking it would be safer if I didn’t. I won’t make that mistake anymore. When you come back to me, I won’t be able to stop. I’ll tell you I love you enough times to make you sick of hearing it. I’ll say it enough to make up for all the times I should’ve already told you.”
“I’ll start right now,” he brings his lips to Gai’s ear and whispers again and again, “I love you. I love you. I love you.”
4.
They’ve come to a stop at the crest of a large hill. Kakashi shields his face from the brightness of the sun as he peers out at the landscape ahead and takes in the view; vibrant green, hilly terrain, and in the distance, the forest they’ll trek through on their journey back home.
Mirai studies a map with scrunched eyebrows beside him, so singularly focused on planning the most efficient route to take back to Konoha. She’s muttering about which path they’re least likely to be ambushed or mugged on.
At her age Kakashi was also obsessed with planning, with staying on task and never straying from his duty for even a second. He was convinced that doing so meant less possibility for error. In his experience it has never made a difference. He’s long accepted that life had the tendency to thwart his meticulous plans, and these days he’s found peace in simply taking things in stride.
“Ooh, a slope!” Gai exclaims, pointing excitedly over the edge of the hill. “Let’s roll, Kakashi! Hop on!”
Gai’s excitement is as infectious as ever, piercing Kakashi easily and wrapping his heart in a blanket of fondness. The academy students might call him “Old Man Kakashi,” and he might have begun spotting a wrinkle or two, but it’s Gai who keeps him from every truly feeling his 50 years. How could he, when it takes only a second for Gai to bring out the playful side he forgets he has sometimes?
“Okay,” Kakashi says without a second thought, climbing into Gai’s lap on the wheelchair. They’ve done more stupid things together after all. What’s a wheelchair ride down a steep hill?
“WHAT?!” he hears Mirai exclaim when she realizes what they’re about to do. He and Gai have yet to succeed in their goal to teach Mirai to loosen up occasionally; she’s beginning to sound like Asuma did back when he used to scold them for having challenges during down time on missions.
“Wait, Gai-san! No!”
Ignoring Mirai’s cries of warning, Gai wheels them over the edge, and the two of them cling to each other as they begin rolling down the hill.
Kakashi turns his head and catches the wild look in Gai’s eyes, and he’s sure he’s sporting a similar one. The world blurs around them as they start to gain speed. It’s fast and thrilling and dangerous and so goddamn fun. Every bump and lurch of the wheelchair has them clutching each other tighter even as their laughter soars. Gai pumps a fist in the air, his hair fluttering in the wind.
Kakashi hasn’t felt weightless like this since their race all those years ago, flying above the ruins of the village. He closes his eyes and lets himself bask in the moment. It feels like they’ll continue flying down the hill forever and nothing in the world can stop them.
Until they hit a rock, that is.
The wheelchair careens wildly and tips over, flinging them onto the grassy surface of the hill. They land beside each other with an audible thud. Kakashi sits up quickly, his eyes darting to Gai’s leg as he feels panic swell in his chest. What if he’s been hurt?
But Gai sits up easily and when his eyes find Kakashi’s he just throws his head back and laughs. Kakashi starts laughing too and they just sit there on the side of the hill, dusty and bruised and savoring the sound of each other’s unrestrained joy.
Kakashi pauses to catch his breath, but the sight of Gai steals any remaining air from his lungs. Face bathed beautifully in sunlight, laughter making the smile lines on his face more prominent. Bright eyes shining with mirth and so much affection it makes Kakashi want to cry.
A flood of gratitude overwhelms him, and he gasps a little, finally able to draw air into his lungs as the magnitude of this moment hits him.
Their past is littered with pain, and the echoes of all that hurt haven’t gone away. Some days are hard. Bad pain days, bad memories, bad thoughts. Early mornings spent at the memorial stone, weighed down by grief and regret.
Nights are harder. Sometimes they both wake from nightmares with ragged breaths, wordlessly clutching each other until their bodies stop trembling. Other nights Kakashi spends hours watching Gai sleep, kept awake by a deep-seated fear that all this happiness will be taken away from him.
Sometimes it can all be so hard.
Yet, they still laugh together like this. They still choose to find joy in life, in each other. In life with each other. Kakashi wants to do this forever.
The words are out of his mouth before he’s fully thought them through. “I love you so much, Gai. I want to be your husband.”
Gai’s laughter comes to a halt. Cue his adorable shocked face. Gai’s mouth opens and closes a few times. Nothing comes out.
“It’s okay, take your time,” Kakashi says, amused.
“I… you… what?”
“Sorry if that wasn’t clear enough. I love you and I’m asking you to marry me.”
“You… uh... marry?”
Kakashi tilts his head at Gai, a teasing smile playing on his lips. He says the next words like he’s issuing a challenge. “You say we’re eternal — marry me, then. Stay by my side forever and I’ll stay by yours.”
Kakashi patiently waits as Gai tries to process the fact that he’s asking him to get married while they’re sprawled on the side of some random hill. Meanwhile, Mirai has finally caught up to them.
“Are you guys okay?” She shrieks when she notices Gai’s expression. “What’s wrong with Gai-san! Is he hurt? Why is he frozen like that?”
“He’s alright. Give him a few moments to come back to us.”
It takes some time, but a smile makes its way back onto Gai’s face, somehow more vibrant than it was before. As Kakashi expected, twin rivers of tears start streaming down his face, but Gai’s voice is steady as he says, “I would be delighted to marry you, Kakashi.”
“HUH??” Kakashi vaguely hears Mirai scream, but his focus stays locked on the man in front of him.
“But you should know,” Gai continues, cupping the side of Kakashi’s face with a calloused hand and pulling him close. “Married or not, I have always planned to stay by your side forever.”
“You guys are too much for me,” Mirai mutters under her breath, turning on her heel and stalking away from them before she’s forced to bear witness to their kiss. “I’m never taking an S-rank mission again.”