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“Absolutely fucking stupid!”
Phil rubbed his eyes, moving so he was behind his desk, putting it between himself and Clint. “Yes, yes, I got the idea that was your opinion at least fifteen minutes ago, Barton, are you done?”
Clint, fuming, turned a variety of colors. “You walked out with zero protection on a neon attention getting sign and I’m just supposed to be alright with that?”
“I didn’t go looking for trouble.” Phil replied sharply. “Agent Emmet wanted to go out and I saw zero harm in it. Could have ended better, though I think we’ve managed to keep ‘robot horse’ out of the news at least. Most people will believe a ton of spooked herbivore will do damage, it seems.”
Clint rubbed his face with an infuriated sound. “And if you had gotten shot?”
“I didn’t.”
“You are the director of SHIELD, you cannot just…”
“Yes. I am. So I am your superior officer and you are bitching your way right into a suspension, Barton.” When the dom looked taken aback, he sighed. “You need to make a decision right fucking now. Are you talking to me as my subordinate or as my dominant?”
“I uh.”
“You can’t do both at the same time, are we clear right now? Your interaction with my dynamic has nothing to do with my current rank, and yours.”
“I can do both at the same time! I can be concerned about your wellbeing both on a personal and professional level!” Clint leaned his hands on Phil’s desk, staring at him. “Yes, you are my superior officer but I love you very much and I cannot lose you, sir, you already died stupidly once. Isn’t that enough? How am I supposed to protect you if…”
“You aren’t.” Phil interrupted. “You aren’t supposed to protect me 24/7. I am an adult.”
“You were in a public place and you got shot at. Am I just supposed to…” He waved a hand. “Forget that? Not be concerned about that? Not be concerned that you care so little about your own wellbeing that you…”
“Went outside while riding an LMD that is basically a weapon?”
“Which would NOT have kept a sniper from tagging you!”
“I’m not letting you lock me up in here like I’m a god damn damsel in distress. Will you please just get around to telling me why you’re throwing a hissy fit because you are actually starting to piss me off and I have other things to do with my day as emotionally trying as it’s been so far.”
He stared. “You don’t give a shit at all do you?”
“Oh I do but I think you’re overreacting. I did a slightly silly thing and didn’t even get hurt. You, meanwhile, have come back ripped to shreds so many times that I have all but lost count. You of all people should not be giving me this lecture.”
“Fine, fine, I’m a fucking hypocrite are you happy?”
He rubbed his eyes. “This conversation is going absolutely nowhere.”
There was a knock at the door then Skye stuck her head in. “Sorry to interrupt the screaming match AC but you have a visitor that I’m not sure we should let in.”
“Well that covers a wide range of people.” Phil observed.
“It’s General Talbot.” She saw his face. “Yes. In person. Here.”
“Someone keeping an eye on him?”
“Dummy is currently threatening him with a fire extinguisher.”
Phil put his face in both hands. “An entire staff of LMDs and hot soldiers and that is the state of our security. And how, exactly, did that happen?”
“Dummy was getting a fresh fire extinguisher from a storage level sir and happened to get on the elevator with General Talbot.” JARVIS intoned from the ceiling. “He then against repeat orders followed Talbot out and proceeded to threaten him with the extinguisher of his own accord.”
He doesn’t know if he wants to cry, scream in frustration or shoot something, if he’s honest. “Skye? New assignment. Get us out of here. Real estate. We need to reduce staff in this building by 75%.”
“You got it AC.”
“Do you want me to bring him here so he doesn’t wander off?” Clint asked after a beat.
“Yes please, we’ll continue this particular argument later, after you’ve decided where your headspace is at.”
Clint made a face at him and left the room, following Skye out.
A few minutes later the door was knocked on again then Talbot stepped in, Clint and Dummy visible in the doorway behind him. “If your goal was to catch me off guard, Coulson, you succeeded.”
“Come on in, you might as well. Thank you Barton. Thank you Dummy, please take the fire extinguisher to Stark now.” Clint gave Phil a resting-murderface stare before walking away, Dummy made a happy noise and shut the door to presumably do as suggested. “Shop robots with fire protection equipment is not an intended line of security.”
Talbot smiled a touch, walking over. “Somehow I suspected it wasn’t. That said you don’t seem to have complete control of this bucking bronco.”
“Hilarious.” Phil managed not to flop into his desk chair.
“But a rather topical point of discussion.” Talbot sat down across from him. “I was hoping we could help each other out?”
“I’m assuming that means you make demands and I concede so you don’t threaten me?”
“A little trust would be nice.”
“A little trust has to be earned.”
“Look, I get it. I felt like I started understanding you, actually, after I saw your interview. I thought that was something strange about you when I met you, now I know.” He gestured at Phil. “Dom posture, but you bow your head slightly like a sub does.”
“I was a dom all my life, now I’m not, none of which is entirely your business.”
“You put it out there. Not something I’d want to deal with especially with everything else you have going on.”
Phil lifted an eyebrow. “Is this where you ask to lighten my load by, I don’t know, taking some of my limited staff?”
“Don’t get me wrong, there’s still a lot of people very interested in the extremis program but I’m a bit more interested in the horse, to be honest. Seems to me you’re sitting on the key to immortality. Or space travel at least. It’s a robot, right? A life model decoy?”
“Somehow I doubt you’re here to discuss colonizing Mars or starting a cloud colony around Jupiter or something. What do you want?”
There was silence for a few breaths then Talbot leveled a finger at him. “You’re a hardass.”
“Would you rather talk about war drugs? Nice misdirection with the hand gestures, flamboyant but not overtly so, but the tremble’s visible.”
Talbot dropped the hand to his lap, staring at Phil. Phil stared back. “Damn.”
“Well this is an interesting little switch isn’t it? What will happen worldwide if it gets out that some of the command of the US Military are hardline war drug addicts and possibly not in their right mind due to withdrawal.” Phil tched.
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“You’re right; we work for the same country lest you forget. I guess with only a fraction of the agency working we have lost any and all production facilities at the moment.”
Talbot grunted. “Part of the deal between SHIELD and the military is we paid cost but couldn’t make our own. Now probably half of command has to get reacquainted with sleeping.”
“Well, they’re going to have to continue to do so, because I still don’t have the staff or security to open any production facilities and frankly I suspect I’ll be doing the world a disservice if I did.”
“Seeking out moral high ground?”
“Working on it, yes.” He saw the look. “Honestly, I don’t have the staff, I don’t have the money to pay the theoretical staff, I don’t have the security to protect the theoretical staff, and I’ve got too much to deal with before I try to reopen a pharmaceutical factory.”
Talbot barked with laughter in spite of himself, rubbing his face. “I appreciate your candor and it sounds like I can actually assist with some of that.”
“You realize I am going to drive a very hard bargain.”
“Hit me.”
“Don’t tempt me. I need assistance securing a base upstate and a guarantee staff transferred there will be left alone. I need payroll for the staff coming in to run the line, all of which will need fresh background checks. I need security to lock the facility down. I need funding for continued research with the goal of reducing the side effects of war drugs, even if some effectiveness is sacrificed.”
“Now wait a minute how much effectiveness are we talking here?”
“Twenty five.”
“Twenty.”
“Done. I also need some transparency with the public and I’d like the FDA involved.”
“You do drive a hard bargain and that is quite a list of demands.”
“Do you need me to write them down for you?”
Talbot snorted. “No, I think I get it. Are you always this pushy?”
“I serve by protecting my people. Which includes Bruce Banner. By the way if you so much as think of chasing him again I will happily blow war drugs wide open to the public.”
“Big words, Coulson.”
“I have something you want, Talbot.”
“Well if that’s the case, here’s some terms. Since we’re funding this little operating we pay nothing for what we’re getting and we have oversight.”
“Shared oversight. The employees will be SHIELD contractors, you’re just the bankroll.”
He whistled. “Harsh.”
“Do you want to kick my ass or beat me then fuck me, I can’t tell.”
Talbot laughed again. “Which option is on the table?”
Phil broke character and smiled. “Neither at the moment. Anything else?”
“No, no, I think I caught which way the wind is blowing. Don’t suppose the first is free from my new dealer though.”
“We don’t have much in stock. What are you looking for?”
Ten minutes later Talbot was seen out with a bottle of a dozen cognitive enhancers, May and Skye turning up at Phil’s office right after. “Was that wise?” May wanted to know. “I don’t know the details but I know you just cut a deal.”
“SHIELD just became drug dealers for the military in exchange for some needed immediate assistance with terms to be renegotiated as needed. Plus we’ll be able to rehire some furloughed employees and that’s always good press.” Phil replied, pouring himself coffee. “Skye, that new assignment? Focus on our facilities upstate. You have my permission to recruit a few LMDs and/or hot soldiers to go do some legwork for you so we know what actual condition those facilities are in.”
“You got it AC.”
“This works out because we have more agents contacting us wanting to come in from the cold.” May had a tablet under her arm and shifted it, fiddling with the screen.
“You have got to be shitting me. We can’t secure anyone else here, we are beyond capacity.”
“They’re at another base right now. Bobbi Morse and…”
“Oh, Barton will be absolutely thrilled. Tell Morse I need a list of who’s there, what bases they know are solid, who are at those bases and who they’ve been taking orders from. In the meantime I’m going to talk to Fury and see if he’s aware of Morse and her friends.”
May lifted an eyebrow. “Maybe this wasn’t the best time to hit you with that.”
“Hmm, belay that and just ask her who is with her and what exactly she’s been up to for this long.”
“She might actually answer those questions.”
“I’m still talking to Nick about her.”
“She says she’s got intel on HYDRA.”
“Then she needs to give it to our intel people to give to Captain Rogers because I suspect he’s going to keep punching people in the face until he finds his dom.”
“Is it sad that I enjoy it when you’re in these moods?” Skye wanted to know. “Just, you know, entirely unfiltered.”
“It’s just the three of us and JARVIS. Did someone hose off Agent Emmet?”
“One of the Ravers did, sir, Doctor Banner is currycombing Emmet now. He seems to be enjoying the process.” JARVIS replied.
“Which he?”
“Both, sir.”
Phil set his coffee down and rubbed his face. “I need to retreat for a while and decompress. May, you’ve got Morse handled?”
“Yes sir.”
“Skye, the base upstate, you got it?”
“Absolutely, am I allowed to go there with the people I’m procuring?”
“Your discretion. Dismissed.”
Phil and Clint are on the same floor of the building. Splitting the floor actually, so when you got off the elevator, there was just a hallway running up the center so they could both access the trash chute and stairwell. Their doors face each other, which while convenient…
Phil ended up standing between the doors for a few moments, staring at his own before staring at Clint’s, trying to decide what he needed, exactly. He knew they needed to talk after the clash earlier but he honestly wasn’t sure if they were capable of any actual discussion on the matter.
Then Clint opened the door, shirtless and staring at him, and that neatly solved that argument. Phil’s pounce was half without thought and he disregarded Clint’s blurt of ‘whoa!’, which he cut off by kissing him, hard and fast.
“Uh, okay, hi?” Clint said once the kiss broke.
“You’re going to sit down, I’m going to kneel, you’re going to pet my hair and we’re going to talk about this issue that happened today because honestly, I don’t want to still be having this fight tomorrow.”
“..Okay. That’s doable. My apartment or yours?”
“Yours please?”
“Sure.” Clint drew him back into the apartment. “Same rule as upstairs, come on.”
Phil stood still and let Clint ease his suit jacket off, swallowing and tilting his head back when his chin was touched lightly, shivering as Clint opened his tie and pulled it free before undoing the top two buttons. He stopped there, but he did undo Phil’s belt and pull it free, catching the gun holster as it came free with it. He hung up the suit jacket, tucking the gun in the pocket and hanging the belt and tie off the hanger.
That done he knelt and unlaced Phil’s boots, smirking when Phil made a derisive noise. “Don’t like me on my knees?”
“No. Not really, sir.” He stepped out of the first boot carefully, setting that foot down after.
“You know, really I should be giving you some corner time. You’ve been extremely difficult today.”
“Corner time?” He’s admittedly a little dismayed at the concept.
“Well, beating my little painslut would be a reward not a punishment.” He smirked up at him again, watching a blush rise to Phil’s cheeks. “Wouldn’t it?”
Phil swallowed hard. “Yes.” He stepped out of the second boot.
“But, since you were being difficult in areas we haven’t delineated as places where you sub to me, I’m going to let it slide.” Clint stood back up, looking at him seriously. “I think that’s the issue here. Boundaries. I agree with your plan, but if you subspace on me we’re not going to be doing much talking so I need you to stay up for me while we do this, kneeling or not.”
Phil nodded and let Clint tug him through the apartment, glancing around. It said something about Tony that in spite of his and Clint’s apartments being mirrored layouts, they felt entirely different. Hell they had different crown molding, that was just ridiculous attention to detail and made him want to subpile their landlord. Clint had large thick kneeling cushions in a pile at the end of the couch and Phil snorted as Clint grabbed one. “Planning on having a harem sir?”
“Nah. My little painslut is enough of a handful.” Clint flopped and dropped the pillow on the floor between his legs.
“Could you not call me that?” He knelt slowly, settling and sighing when Clint cupped the back of his neck and tugged him to lean into the chair and one of his legs.
“I love your blush. Like you think it’s something you should be ashamed of or embarrassed about when it’s actually incredibly hot and not that unusual.” He rubbed the back of Phil’s neck. “So where should we start?”
“You freaking out at me in public at the park?” Phil suggested.
“I still think I had a right to be upset. You flaunted security protocol, you’re in charge, people are still upset about everything that happened and are going to be gunning for you.” Clint frowned at him.
“That’s true, and the public seeing someone yell at their commanding officer is not going to help us get a better image.” Phil huffed. “I understand you being upset about it. You’re right, this is a boundary problem. In private, off duty, I am your sub. In public, on duty, I am your commanding officer. If you can’t maintain that then we have to cut this relationship off Clint and I don’t want to do that.”
“I’m not that good at compartmentalizing.” He admitted after a beat, stroking over Phil’s hair. “Fuck. You have to understand, this right now is a fantasy I had for a long time. I don’t want to lose you to something or someone stupid. I want to be able to keep you safe.”
He sighed. “I know, but you also need to respect me as not only your superior officer but also as the semi-badass I happen to consider myself to be.”
“Semi? Total badass. But you’re human.”
“And I was riding an intelligent weapon, who saw the threat and put it down.” Phil sighed. “You need to trust me.”
“I trust you with my life.”
“Then trust me with my own.”
Clint rubbed his eyes with his free and. “That’s not as easy as you’re suggesting.”
“Work on it for me? And I’ll work on keeping you apprised of what’s going on.”
He was quiet for a few minutes, thinking. “You do need to get better at that with regards to work related stuff. You’ve been prompt with information in our personal life, but not our professional.”
“Do you really want the promotion to know everything that’s going on?”
“I think I do, yeah. Why? Am I going to be your good eyes?”
Phil smiled a touch. “Not a bad idea, actually.”