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Summary
Caleb was having a rough week. It was becoming very apparent, enough for people around him to notice. It was nothing new; it happened occasionally when certain anniversaries came around, or when a memory refused to leave him alone, or when his mind would decide he was just being too happy.
It was on those occasions that the air became thick and cloying around him like a cloud of perpetual smoke, making it hard to breathe. His mind would supply him with all the reasons why he wasn't worthy of the life he was leading, of his teaching position, of interacting with his betters: people who were innocent and untouched by darkness.
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Caleb is spiraling out of control, pushing his friends and chosen family away, isolating himself from those who care about him. Eventually, Essek decides to do something about it. He knows that nothing mundane like talking would be of any help, so he offers Caleb what the human thinks he wants: punishment, atonement, debasement, a way to quiet the vicious voices in his head.