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Skating home from school the day before Valentine’s Day, Reki checked behind him to see Langa had stopped at a shop window. Reki tracked back, joining him.
The candy store’s window display was a red and brown extravaganza of Valentine’s Day chocolate. Langa was almost drooling as he stared at the decadent truffles, intricately decorated cakes, and chocolate covered strawberries. There were also rows of boxes tied up in red ribbons with hearts and “ LOVE ” everywhere.
“Reki, these look amazing. Look!” He pointed excitedly, “They even have Rocky Mountain Chocolateer from Canada!”
“Um, yeah. They look okay. You like sweets more than I do.” Reki rolled his eyes. Langa was still such a kid sometimes. He’s lucky it was so adorable.
“ Jeez! Look at the prices! I’ll never be able to afford any of it.” Langa sighed, dropping his hands from the glass and looking down in defeat. He leaned his forehead against the window and stared inside with puppy dog eyes.
Reki scanned the prices, most were out of his budget too. But a few of the smaller ones he could afford. He wondered if Langa would even like something small like that…
“Not even the cheaper ones? Would… you want one of those?”
Langa looked dishearteningly again at the lower-end chocolates.
“Yeah, those look really good, too. I’d love to get one… but I still couldn’t afford it. My mom got her hours cut, so my whole paycheck goes toward supporting us now.”
“Aw, that sucks man.” Reki slapped Langa’s back and rubbed it in small circles.
“But you’ll get loads of chocolates from the girls anyway.” Reki said, forcing a smile. He better get used to these feelings of jealousy– it would be all he’ll be feeling tomorrow.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“You know, girls give the boys they like chocolates on Valentine’s Day. It’s tradition here.”
“Oh, I didn’t know. Well, no one will give me any chocolate. I don’t even know anyone but you.”
“You’re going to be surprised tomorrow.” Reki laughed, then added: “And you know, you’ve lived here for over a year now, you should know more people than just me.”
Langa got back on his board with a shrug of his shoulders. “But I don’t want to. I don’t need to, you’re already more than I could ever deserve.”
Reki was caught off-guard and stood frozen for a moment, one foot on his board as his chest thumped. His face flushed redder than the display in the window and he opened his mouth to protest, but couldn’t make a sound.
Langa was about to go, but turned around with a beautiful, broad smile that reached his eyes.
“Come on.” He said, gesturing for Reki to join him.
Reki pushed forward, his flustered mind racing: What the heck, Langa? You can’t just say something like that and… and… just smile at me like that… and then just go on like it didn’t happen!
Reki doubled back to the candy store after he and Langa parted ways. He convinced himself of his justification as he made his way there:
I’m just buying my best friend some chocolate he wants because he can’t afford it and that’s what good friends do.
Just because I know he’s going to get chocolate from girls, I don’t know if it’s going to be what he likes, or any good at all!
This is chocolate I know he wants. So what if it’s me giving it to him? He didn’t even know about the tradition anyway. He won’t think anything of it. He won’t think I… like him. Even if I do.
Reki popped up his hood and tightened it around his face to hide in the comforting yellow fabric.
He was still embarrassed by these new feelings. Honestly, he probably always had them, but he just started to notice it recently. He started to steal glances when Langa wasn’t looking, started to stare at him in class, and started to linger at his touch. The fact was cemented when he started dreaming of kissing Langa, waking up out of breath with a racing heart. He couldn’t deny it. He was in love.
And now he really wanted to buy him chocolate. If he was honest with himself, it wasn’t as a friend, but as a crush and potential love interest. He knew Langa would get lots of other (better?) offers, but still, he desperately prayed for Langa to choose him.
He went into the candy store and browsed their selection. He was having trouble deciding, when a sales woman approached him.
“Hello, can I help you find anything?” She cooed.
“Um, I’m just browsing your Valentine’s Day chocolates…”
“Oh? Who are these chocolates for?”
“My, uh… my best friend.”
“Tell me about him.”
Reki looked to the side, and tried to maintain a neutral expression. But he still twisted his hoodie sleeve in his hands nervously.
“He’s… he’s really shy and quiet usually. But he opens up sometimes and he’s actually really kind, smart, and funny. He’s probably the most attractive person I know, but that doesn’t get to his head at all. He doesn’t care, which makes him seem really cool… And he’s, like, good at everything he tries. Except with socializing, I guess… But he talks in his sleep sometimes, and is impossible to get up in the morning, and he’s really passionate about the things he loves.”
“Mhm, mhm. He sounds dreamy. I can see why you like him.”
“I don’t– well… it’s complicated.”
The saleswoman nodded and smiled knowingly. She probably has had a lot of kids Reki’s age in here with these same issues the last couple days.
“And what’s your budget?” She asked softly.
“About… 5,000 yen.”
“I think you’d be interested in our ‘Soulmate Collection,’ it’s right over here…” She led Reki to a corner of the store with a display of moderately sized and priced boxes of chocolates.
In the middle he saw a box with the tag: “I Love You For Infinity.” It was perfect… but maybe too perfect? Am I actually confessing or just pretending it’s “between friends” chocolate?
Reki shook his head, he couldn’t let himself overthink. Infinity was their thing. It was a sign– these were the right chocolates. He thanked the smiling saleswoman and bought them with every last yen he had, then cheerfully brought them back home.
He put it in the fridge and went to take a nap before “S” tonight. He smiled himself to sleep, even humming some pop-y love song.
His phone alarm woke him late in the night and he got ready to meet Langa outside to ride with him on the work scooter.
They always went to “S” together, it was their other special thing. It was somewhat for work, as they often made deliveries or advertised for DOPE SKETCH. But they mostly went together for fun.
Reki thought back to when he used to go alone or with their manager, Oka, and it just felt wrong. It had to be Langa now. Langa or bust.
Langa picked him up and Reki felt a little shy holding on to him.
Will Langa definitely not think it’s weird to get chocolate from me? What if he takes it as a confession and rejects me? Or worse, what if he gets really creeped out?
That’s when they approached the gates of “S” and Reki saw the giant flower wall with a depiction of Adam and Langa kissing. He nearly threw up. At least he could never be the creepiest guy pining after Langa. Adam had that secured.
When they got off, Reki studied Langa’s face, but it was blank.
“Did you see…?”
“Yeah. I don’t know what to say about that–”
“SNOW!!!” Adam descended from the top of a tall, cloaked object to stand in front of them.
“Beautiful Snow, here is your present. It’s midnight now and Valentine’s Day. I want you to have the best, most distinguished, most expensive chocolates–”
The cloak fell down revealing a David-like chocolate statue of Adam.
“So, have a piece of me!”
Langa stared blankly. “Thanks.”
How did he care so little about this? Reki ground his teeth. How he hated Adam. He doesn’t even really care about Langa, he just thinks he’s hot and cool, like all the girls and everyone el–
“Reki? Are you okay? You’re all flushed.” Langa turned from Adam and his gift and put his hand on Reki’s forehead.
“You’re pretty hot, are you sick? Come on, let’s go somewhere cooler.”
Somewhere cooler? So… somewhere with less people, less Adam. Reki nodded eagerly.
Langa wrapped an arm around his shoulder and towed him off. Reki flipped Adam off behind his back as they left.
They found a somewhat grassy spot to sit down, and Langa fished out a water bottle from the bag to give Reki.
“Snow?” A lanky girl in skate gear came up to them.
“Wha- yeah?” Langa asked, startled and almost dropping the water bottle he was handing to Reki. He stood up straight and faced her, looking more confused than anything else.
“H-here. I got you some chocolate. I’m not confessing or anything, I just think you’re really cool and– and wanted to give you some.” She drove the toe of her shoe into the ground nervously as she handed Langa her gift.
“Oh, thanks.” Langa said, with nary a hint of emotion.
“O-okay. See you later!”
Langa blinked as she dashed away.
“Weird…” Langa said, opening the chocolates and studying them before trying one. “Want any? They have a gooey center... like you!” Langa cooed with his mouth full.
Reki shook his head and drank more water. Adam actually did make him feel physically ill. Chocolate right now would just make him nauseous. And he was too angry to even process Langa’s comment. He needed to cool down, figuratively and literally.
But every time he thought he was finally done being sick with jealousy, some other skater girl would come up to Langa and give him sweets. Some even confessed, but thankfully Langa turned all of them down. Even the really cute ones that made Reki’s jaw drop.
Reki was so on edge after the fifth girl, Langa looked at him and sighed with a smile, putting his hands on his hips.
“You’re not feeling well. Let’s get you home.”
"But--" Reki started to protest, they hadn’t even gone skating yet.
“No buts– I can’t have fun if you’re not having fun. And we have school in the morning anyway.”
Er, school. Right. Even more girls confessing to Langa and giving him presents. Reki figured he better get some sleep for it. He was going to have to really push down his insecurities all day…
Clutching Langa on the way home, Reki finally started to feel better. Langa didn’t run away with Adam or any of the girls, instead he was taking care of Reki. Maybe he doesn’t like Reki the same way, but it was clear Langa did care for him. Probably more than anyone else.
Reki dropped his head against Langa’s back. Langa didn’t tense up or say anything, he just kept on driving.
The morning greeted Langa with a shoe locker overflowing with sweets. He was taken aback, gaping at it with an eye twitching.
“Are… are my shoes even still in here?” He said incredulously and gently poked a chocolate box like it would explode.
He turned to Reki, looking completely lost. Reki couldn’t help but shake his head and laugh, even he was surprised by how much it was.
That was the thing about Langa– you’d always be surprised at how amazing he was. How many people he mesmerized, or how skilled he was at something. It was no wonder so many girls wanted him, or Reki, for that matter.
“I have a bag, we can put them in there for now and go through it later.” Reki said, digging a sack out of his bag.
“Oh… thanks, Reki. You always know what to do, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Langa smiled graciously at him, making his heart skip a beat. Now he struggled with the bag, flustered as he was. But he managed to get it out and held it open for Langa.
“No-no problem. Let’s get this cleared out…” He stammered slightly, turning his head to try to hide his embarrassment.
Then it was the same with Langa’s desk, full to bursting. Langa didn’t look confused this time, but he didn’t look happy either. If Reki wasn’t mistaken, he looked pretty annoyed. Reki couldn’t blame him, even he felt a tinge of irritation.
“Do you have another bag?” Langa asked with a deep sigh.
In between every class, a girl or two would come up to Langa. “I’ve admired you from afar,” this, “I’ve been watching you all year,” that. They were tired lines even when the first girl used them.
Halfway through the day, Langa was carrying around four bags of sweets and gifts.
“Can I just turn it down?” Langa asked Reki, eyes grim and tired.
“That’d be considered really rude. In fact, you’re expected to return a gift to all of these girls on White Day…”
“What? What the hell is White Day?!”
“Dude, calm down. I’ll help you out. I don’t mind. It’s not like I got anything, so I’ll help you with all of yours.” Reki said with a hint of disappointment. Langa seemed to catch it and frowned.
“These all should be for you. You’re the outgoing one that everyone likes. I don’t understand this disparity at all. I would give you chocolate if I was a girl, not me.”
Reki blushed immediately, minimizing and changing the subject.
“Y-you don’t know what you’re talking about. Anyway, do you want me to carry the bags for a while?”
Langa turned his head away and grumpily mumbled, “I know what I’m talking about. But yeah…”
Reki held out his hand to take the bags. Langa handed them to him and gave a little sigh of relief.
“Thank you. I appreciate it. I just want to go home.” Reki had never seen Langa look so defeated. The great Snow, champion of “S,” the guy good at everything, was taken down by a few bags of candy. It was almost laughable.
“Hasegawa?”
“Oh no.”
Langa stopped dead in his tracks and looked more fear-stricken than even when he got a cut that bled.
“You can call me Seki-chan, I’m sure you know me. I’m probably the most popular girl in school. I usually date older guys, but I guess I could give you a shot. So, I had my admirers make this for you–”
A boy with thick glasses and a bowl cut brought out a big, elaborate chocolate cake. It seemed to be heavy for him, he tittered a little walking it out.
“So, I was thinking we could go out for a bit, be the school royalty.”
“Sorry–”
“Of course you’d say yes, wait– ‘Sorry?’”
“Yeah, sorry but I don’t want to go out with you. Thank you for the cake. It looks good, but I actually do not know what to do with it…” Langa tried to be polite, but you could tell he was done with it all. His voice was monotone and his speech rushed, like he just wanted to leave. (And he clearly did.)
“You take it and appreciate it. That’s what you do. Then you apologize on your knees for rejecting me, taking it back and begging me to go out with you.”
Reki balled his fists. This girl pissed him off almost as much as Adam. What a self-centered, egotistical bitch!
“Hey!” Reki interjected, “He said no! And I don’t blame him, you’re really unpleasant. Take your cake and leave us alone.”
I can’t believe this girl! No one talks to Langa like that. I thought she was supposed to like him! She sure doesn’t act like it!
Reki scowled at her as hard and coldly as he could, while she gasped and stammered.
“Hmmph!” She finally let out and quickly turned and rushed away.
“Seki-chan, wait, what do I–” The glasses boy called after her, turning on his heel. The cake didn’t go with him, instead toppling over and falling right onto Langa.
He wiped the cake off his eyes and blinked, confused by what just occurred. He looked down at himself, covered in chocolate cake and frosting, and picked a heart-shaped decoration off the front of his shirt, dropping it to the floor.
“Shit! Langa, are you okay?” Reki asked frantically. “Wa-wait, I have a towel.”
Reki dug through his bag for a towel, but Langa put out his hand to stop him. Reki gulped. He had never seen Langa truly mad. Just annoyed. Was he going to completely blow up? Reki could almost see the steam coming from his ears.
A crowd had formed around them to see what the commotion was, they murmured as Langa wiped more cake from his face.
“I’m going home.” Langa said sternly. “I don’t care about any of this. I don’t care about these chocolates. I don’t care about Valentine’s Day or ‘White’ Day. And I don’t care if that makes me rude.”
He pushed through the crowd and towards the school exit. Reki looked at the chocolates, not sure what to do with them, then decidedly dropped them and ran after Langa.
Reki wondered if he was the same as all these other people. Just bothering Langa. He felt a pang of guilt for his selfish feelings. He really couldn’t help them, he tried to not have them. But maybe he shouldn’t give him the chocolates…
“Wait, Langa, wait for me!” Reki called after him as he stamped out of the school.
Langa stopped and waited, not turning around.
“Langa… I’m sorry. It sucks you have to deal with all this.” Reki said while catching his breath.
“I just need to go home and take a shower. Yes, a shower, not a bath. You don’t always need a bath!”
“O…kay. That’s fine. You can just take a shower.” Reki said quietly, some hurt on his face. Is Langa upset with me, too?
Langa sighed. “I’m sorry. You didn’t do anything, you’ve helped me out all day. But this is just showing me how much I don’t fit in here. And I didn’t fit in in Canada, either, so I guess I just don’t fit in anywhere.”
“That’s not true, you fit in with me. I think we fit together perfectly.” Reki didn’t mean for that to sound as gooey as it did, but it was out of his mouth now and he couldn’t say he didn’t mean it.
“...Thanks, Reki. That means a lot.” Reki could see through smears of chocolate that Langa was blushing and smiling softly as he looked down. Was it really that embarrassing?
“Would you mind if I came with you?” Reki asked, not wanting to leave Langa’s side.
“Sure, I’m just going home. I need to shower but then I don’t really know what.” Langa sighed again, shaking his head.
“I wish I could make today better for you,” Reki whispered.
“What do you mean? You already do.” Langa said matter-of-factly as he started walking again. Reki pulled his hood up to hide in it before he caught up with Langa and matched his stride.
As they walked, Reki still wondered if Langa would want his chocolates now, after all of this. He said he didn’t care about any of this, and Reki couldn’t blame him. This was probably the worst holiday for someone like Langa, someone so beautiful but equally misunderstood.
Dressed in clean clothes with wet hair, Langa came into the living room where Reki had been waiting.
He was watching skate videos on his phone, eyes glued to the screen-- until he looked up and saw Langa fresh from the shower. He bit his lip, and thought: Holy crap. He looks really hot with his hair wet like that. Reki gulped as he watched a drip from his locks follow the curve of his jaw, running down his neck onto his shoulder.
“Did you find a good one?” Langa asked with a smile.
“Y-yeah, come watch this.” Reki forced his offending thoughts out of his head and pulled up the best video he had found.
Langa sat down on the couch and leaned in next to Reki, their faces almost touching. But Reki was used to this kind of closeness with Langa, it only made him a little nervous. And that was only because Reki had realized if they turned their heads, they’d be kissing.
He seemed to be in a better mood now. Or, back to normal at least. It was very rare and very special to see Langa in a truly good mood. It was almost always neutral.
The video finished and Langa sat back. Reki put his phone down and tried to think of what to say. His best friend had had a bad day– would the chocolates waiting in his bag make it better? Or worse?
“So… chocolates…”
“Ugh. Yeah?”
“You don’t like them anymore, or…?”
“I wouldn’t say that. I just don’t like people thinking I’m some playboy when I’m not. This whole ‘girls give chocolates to who they like,’ is misleading. It’s not who they like, it’s who they think they like. And I don’t even want to talk about Adam. In the West, Valentine’s Day is more for people already dating, already committed. That’s what I think it should be. For people that actually know each other.”
“What if someone who knows they like you gives you chocolates? Someone who knows you really well? Would it be better then?”
“Yeah… I think that’d be better. Who would know they like me, though?”
This was it, Reki thought, Do or die. I’m going to give him the chocolates and see how he reacts. That’s all I need to do, play it by ear. I can do this– I can just pick up my bag… unzip the front pocket… take out the box…
He took out a simple brown box with red ribbon. He looked down, blushing a little, and held it out for Langa. He looked up with just his eyes to see Langa’s expression. He stared unblinkingly, like he was in utter disbelief. Reki cringed in pain. Langa was never very expressive, but he had hoped for more than this!
“Reki? You got me chocolates?” Langa finally asked, sitting up quickly and then slowly taking the box. He looked at it with astonishment and studied it carefully, like he thought it would break.
“Those ones you wanted… at the candy store...”
“Oh… wow…”
Langa looked at the tag, it read “I Love You For Infinity,” in sparkling calligraphy on one side, the other Reki had drawn an ornate infinity symbol with silver marker and beautifully written Langa’s name.
“You don’t have to accept them. I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything. I just wanted–” Reki shook his head, looking down even more and bracing himself by his hands on his knees. Oh no. Don’t cry. Don’t you dare cry. You’re worse than all those girls. Even they didn't cry!
Despite his internal protest, big teardrops ran down Reki’s cheeks, dropping onto his jeans. He wiped his eyes and held his sobs back.
“Don’t cry, Reki, I’ll gladly accept it. I want to, I promise. They're so perfect. I love them!” Langa praised, as he suddenly took one of Reki’s hands from his knee and laced their fingers together.
“Are you really sure?” Reki croaked.
“Yeah.” Langa gently stroked Reki’s hand and looked away. He had a slight blush and a gentle expression. “This… this is different. You actually thought about this. It’s not just the most expensive or elaborate gift, it shows you actually know me and listen to me. You truly like me. I couldn’t ask for more than that.”
“I do.” Reki gasped, words pouring out of him with no control, bursting like candy with a soft center when you bite down.
“I really, truly like you, Langa. I didn't mean to, I tried not to, but I couldn’t help it, I fell so hard for you. And it wasn’t just your looks, I fell in love with everything about you. Your sense of humor, your passion and drive, your kindness, your expressions. Everything.”
Oh no. I admitted it all, shown every last card. I didn’t mean to, it just happened. What is Langa thinking now? Is he utterly disgusted?
Reki dared a glance up at Langa, accidentally meeting his eyes. They were gleaming as he smiled softly. Langa shakily reached up and cupped Reki’s cheek. Reki blinked a tear away that Langa wiped with his thumb.
“I absolutely adore you, Reki.” He whispered almost too softly to hear.
“But… you don’t like me?” Reki clenched his eyes shut, bracing for the worst.
“I do. I like you so much. I… I love you. I always have.”
Reki stared disbelievingly into Langa’s eyes. Langa likes me? Loves me? And always has?
“Can I kiss you?” Langa asked with a bit more confidence, but still so quietly Reki barely heard him.
He wasn’t even sure he was awake, it seemed like all his dreams were coming to life. What he’d fantasized about a million times was materializing right in front of him.
He cautiously nodded his head, waiting to wake up at any moment.
Is this really happening? Langa wants to kiss me? Why? I’m nothing compared to him… I can’t be his choice, I can’t be the one…
Langa took a small, shaky breath then closed the gap between them, landing his lips against Reki’s. Reki closed his eyes and his racing mind was lulled into peace. Or at least distracted.
He took in everything he could sense. He felt Langa’s lips, impossibly soft and too good to be true. He smelled so good, like sandalwood and aloe. His damp bangs brushed against Reki’s face, like tendrils of silk. And he could feel Langa’s breath quicken against his cheek, short and choppy, like he couldn’t catch it.
Langa separated, and Reki opened his eyes again to see Langa breathing fast and blushing heavily. He continued to stroke Reki’s hand he was still holding.
“Wow,” He said with a long exhale, “I… I can’t believe this is real.”
Reki, slowly coming out of his daze, shook his head. “I can’t either. Why me? Why would you pick me?”
“How could I possibly not pick you, Reki? You’re my best friend in the whole world, you mean everything to me. You’re fun and interesting, you stand up for me, you became my friend and taught me everything you knew just out of kindness. You’re truly the most incredible person I’ve ever met. And I've wanted to kiss you since we met. If I lived a thousand more lifetimes, I wouldn’t find anything like what we have again.”
Reki gripped Langa’s hand tight as tears started falling again. Langa pulled Reki close to him, laying his head on his shoulder and stroking his hair.
“Shh, it’s okay. I’ll love you for infinity, Reki. I’ll love you so much until you can’t stand me anymore.”
“That will never happen…” Reki said with a sniffle, his breathing starting to even out.
“I hope not. I want to be like this forever.”
“Okay.” Reki whispered, closing his eyes and relaxing against Langa. “We’ll be like this forever, then.”
Langa brushed Reki’s hair out of his face and leaned down to kiss him softly.
This is real. Langa and I are actually together, actually kissing and cuddling. Langa chose me to be his. Out of everyone, he chose me…
Langa lifted his head again, resting it on top of Reki’s. He sighed in contentment.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Reki.”