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Summary
"What the fuck do you mean, they quit?" Louis asks.
This man—demon, whatever—looks over at Louis with a withering glance before tossing the apple he's eating. It misses the trash can by about a foot, falling to the floor of Louis' kitchen and definitely leaving a sticky residue that he's going to have to clean up later.
"You kept getting yourself into trouble and their afterlife experience became too stressful, so they quit. After the fifth guardian angel quit their post last week, there were no other volunteers, so that's where I stepped in. I was getting bored of welcoming souls into hell anyway...they're so goddamn whiney, I'm always like, bro, just shut the fuck up—"
"So you're my guardian demon," Louis says flatly, cutting the demon/man/thing off before he can get any further.
He smiles largely enough to show dimples, which seem like a completely inappropriate thing for a demon to have.
"Exactly," the demon confirms.