Chapter Text
“Congratulations on your graduation, Nanase!”
It was too loud in here. Haruka replied with a brief ‘thanks’ to the classmate patting him on the back with a diploma. He knew his graduating class wasn’t tiny, but being packed together in the Iwatobi auditorium like this was the first time he had to be social with the entire crowd of a thousand at once. It was draining to him, especially with all the cheering after the ceremony had finished. His arms were instinctively tense at his sides as he pushed his way through the bustling groups of people. He stood in line until his feet were numb, got the fancy paper, and survived the hour-long speech about adulthood: all he wanted to do was go home now. There was a professional swimming career waiting for him once he made it out of here. Tokyo University had offered him a scholarship to be on their swimming team, an offer that he saw no reason to decline.
“Haru-chan. Congratulations.” A soft voice called out behind him while a hand grabbed his shoulder. Haruka spun around to meet the same gentle smile he had known since he was a child. Makoto’s eyes were bright with emotion.
“Congratulations, Makoto.” He offered his long-time friend a small smile in return. He didn’t mind spending a few extra minutes talking with him before he left. “You worked hard.”
Makoto beamed, sheepishly gripping at his honor cords. He had fantastic grades all through high school and definitely had enough cords to prove it. Haruka only had one for the swimming team, one cord that he was more than content to have by itself. “Thanks! My parents have been crying the whole time about it. I can’t tell if they’re happy that I’m graduating or sad that I’m leaving…”
“Both, probably. You were crying too.”
Makoto rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. “I guess I take after them more than I thought. Aren’t you excited too, Haru?”
His gaze fell to the diploma held tightly in his hands. He definitely didn’t feel excited about the piece of paper or the blue robes he was given. Haruka just felt eager to get out and move on, like a dog broken off a leash. “Sort of.”
“It’s been a long three years.” Makoto seemed to expect the noncommittal answer. “We’ll be moving on to the same college now.”
“It won’t feel that way when I’m at Tokyo University weeks earlier than you.”
“Swimming team orientation, right? You’ll have fun.” He said in hopes of easing his friend’s nerves, “I’m sure the swimming team will be nice.”
Haruka threw him a disapproving glance. “I’m not going there to make friends. All I want to do is swim.”
He got an amused stare in response. “Well, you’ll definitely have to study while you’re there.”
Makoto walked out of the crowd with Haruka, leaning against the wall near the glass door to the auditorium lobby. “Do you remember our last relay as a team, Haru? We got sixth in the Nationals because we came to understand each other better, and our teamwork improved as a result.”
Haruka stood at the door, unconvinced. “That was different. I can’t worry about my teammates on the professional level. It would be a distraction.”
“I don’t know about that. I think it would be worth your time to make friends with the same goals as you. You never know who you’ll grow close to…”
Makoto’s words became less intelligible as Haruka stared outside, watching a familiar group of guys. Rei and Nagisa had started a group hug with Rin, who came only to watch his friends graduate. Their emotional outburst came like a chain reaction, starting when Rin’s teary-eyed choking made Nagisa break out in a full wail. Rei followed soon after with muffled sobs and denials of their team being broken apart. Haruka dully noted their swaying in prediction that they would probably trip and fall over each other in the next few minutes. Behind Rin, away from the cluster of hugging and crying…
“Is that Sousuke?” Makoto caught up with Haruka’s line of sight, watching Sousuke stand behind them to keep to himself. “Did he watch the graduation ceremony with Rin?”
“Why would he come here to watch us graduate? We’re not friends.”
“Don’t be like that.” Makoto encouraged, nudging Haruka, “Things might have been rough during swimming season, but Sousuke is a nice person. He cares a lot about Rin, so maybe he wanted to congratulate us with him.”
“Maybe for you.” Haruka’s lip twitched in displeasure, his eyes still on Sousuke. “But he’s not here for me. He should go home now.”
Makoto sighed, “Haru…” He looked back to the auditorium crowd, waving to his family as they approached him. “I have to go talk to my brother and sister. I’ll see you at the graduation party tonight!”
Haruka watched Makoto happily run to his family. He then opened the door to go outside. He contemplated calling out to Rin and the others, but decided against it and continued to watch them for a while longer. As he expected, their hug broke up when they all collapsed to the ground, tripping over each other’s feet.
“Ah! Rin-chan, you’re way too heavy! I’m stuck!” Nagisa protested loudly and squirmed around, making the situation worse.
“It’s not my fault! And hey, why am I the only one you call heavy?! Rei is the same size as me!” While Rin and Nagisa continued to argue and untangle themselves, Rei focused on patting the ground for his glasses that fell off during the collision.
“Rin-san, Nagisa-kun! Have either of you seen my glasses?” He asked, unaware that Nagisa had found his glasses minutes earlier and decided to wear them himself.
Watching his friends make a mess of themselves was therapeutic, Haruka thought. At least now he felt less bothered by having been stuck inside an auditorium all day. He still felt annoyed by Sousuke’s presence, though, and his attention drifted back to him standing on the sidelines of the chaos. Like Haruka, Sousuke had no intention of getting caught up in the mess. He stood and watched without a word. A small part of Haruka’s thoughts wondered if Sousuke was feeling out of place. He seemed like he would be uncomfortable here if he was separated from Rin, much like Haruka in social situations without Makoto.
Sousuke’s eyes were unreadable as usual, making it impossible to tell what he was thinking. They were a dull teal that could be easily confused for blue on days that he wasn’t wearing a green shirt. Haruka looked to Sousuke’s torso and nodded. ‘Today is a green shirt day.’
But the shirt’s color wasn’t what kept him staring. The bright, official ‘Tokyo U Swim Team’ logo caught his attention like a warning siren. He felt the alarms ring in his mind, ‘Why does Sousuke have the same shirt that I got with my acceptance letter?’
Only members of the swim team should have that shirt. As much as he would have liked to believe that Sousuke stole the shirt off someone’s back, it just wouldn’t make sense. That would leave only one explanation left.
“Are you trying to start something with me, Haruka?” The logo was moving closer to his face and by the time he looked up, Sousuke’s head was hovering above him. His eyebrows curved down in irritation with a glance at Haruka. “You’ve been staring me down for five solid minutes.”
Haruka glared at him. “There’s no way you’re on the Tokyo University swim team. Your shoulder would never last through it.”
“Oh. So that’s what this is about.” Sousuke’s expression lightened up as if he found Haruka entertaining. A casual smirk played on his lips. “Were you worried about me?”
His response was the other’s impatient frown. “This is a waste of time. You probably did steal it.”
He began to walk past him, but was stopped abruptly by Sousuke’s hand grabbing his arm. Haruka peered back at it before his gaze fell to his shoulder instead. “You weren’t able to stretch your arm like that before.”
“Not before the surgery, I wasn’t.” Sousuke let go as he rubbed at his left shoulder. “A few days after my last relay, I went to the hospital for it and I’ve been in rehab for three months. The doctors say I should be able to swim again in August so long as its freestyle.”
“Free?” Haruka looked like a deer in headlights. “So you were accepted in Tokyo University as a freestyle swimmer…”
Sousuke shrugged with his good shoulder. “They liked my past records and wanted to give me a chance after I finished rehab.”
“So you and I….” Haruka spoke slowly. “We’re going to go to the same school? For the same team?”
“I won’t be swimming for the first two weeks, but yeah.”
“You’re not going to where Rin is?”
Haruka remembered eavesdropping on the moment that Sousuke told Rin about his injury. Whenever he thought about it, he could still hear Rin’s choked sobbing from that day. It made his chest feel tight that he remembered every word they said. He wasn’t typically one to regret his actions, but since then, Haruka had regretted listening to that conversation. He felt awkward around Sousuke from that point on because it made it impossible to see him as a cold and distant enemy anymore. His mental image of an evil, scary Sousuke became invalid when he thought of the gentle voice he spoke with or the broken smile on his face while Rin cried for him. What should he have felt, after witnessing a private moment like that? He didn’t think it would be pain. To that end, he chalked it up to being discomforted by Rin’s breakdown and thought no longer on the heartbroken expression of Sousuke etched into his memory.
“Rin is on a different level,” Sousuke started to explain, “With my injury, I couldn’t make it to the school he chose. I don’t plan to give up on swimming with him someday though.”
“He would be happy to hear that.” Haruka nodded, looking down at the ground. He didn’t want to bring up anymore conflict between Sousuke and Rin. For them, he figured his best course of action was to give them the space they needed. It was easy for him to do, as he enjoyed being alone, but a tiny feeling of jealousy still nagged at him every now and then.
“Haruka.” Sousuke called out as he walked away. Haruka stopped, glancing up at him as he continued talking. “I saw your graduation.”
“Rin dragged you here?”
“Kind of.” Sousuke’s fingers reached to grab the graduation cap tassel dangling near Haruka’s face. He moved it to the left side of the hat. “You forgot to do this.”
Startled, Haruka took a step back from him, holding onto his hat protectively. “I don’t care about that.”
Sousuke crossed his arms over his chest. “You should care. Once you move the tassel, you’ve officially graduated,” He clicked his tongue as he turned his head away, “So, now that it’s done…congratulations, Haruka.”
It had a different impact this time. He’d been congratulated by people all day long, but it never really felt like he was a graduate. He’d just wanted to end the day and go home because he hated crowds and loud voices. Then, he’d found the guy who had hated him for a whole year. Congratulations. Hearing Sousuke say it felt different to him, because for the first time in that day, he didn’t want this part of his life to end.
“…Thanks.”
Sousuke didn’t expect Haruka to thank him. He was at a loss. “Yeah. Don’t mention it.”
Haruka opened his mouth to reply when Rin made his entrance. “Sousuke! Haru!” He ran over, wrapping an arm around Haruka’s shoulders and grinning. “Congrats.”
At the same time Rin spoke, Haruka talked over him, “You already told me that, Rin.”
“Tch, you’re no fun. I can say it as many times as I want to,” He then turned to Sousuke for back up, “Samezuka’s graduation ceremony was last week, so Sousuke and I had a good time watching you and Makoto go through the same thing.”
Sousuke muttered jokingly. “Rin got to cry his heart out both times.”
Rin glared back at him, though it was obvious that it was all a part of their usual friendly banter. “Go ahead, keep it up. Go far enough and I won’t help you out with your English homework when you get to college.”
Haruka looked back and forth between them, then pulled away from Rin, stepping aside. “I should go now. The ceremony is over.”
“What?!” Rin gawked at him, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “You already want to leave? I don’t get you, Haru…why don’t we all leave together?”
“No, I agree with him,” Sousuke spoke up, walking past the two of them. “Leaving together would be a pain.”
Rin growled in frustration before marching after Sousuke. “What’s wrong with you two? It’s not like either of you have girls to confess to before you leave…”
“You make it sound like you do.”
“Of course I don’t! Shut it, Sousuke!”
Haruka watched them continue to bicker with each other as they walked away. The selfish part of his mind told him to run after them, but his sensibility forbade him from doing something so reckless. Rin wasn’t crying and Sousuke wasn’t broken. That was good enough for Haruka. For the past year, he felt like he was the cause of a lot of needless stress on his friends. He didn’t want to depend on them anymore. If he did that, he was sure he would never have to face Makoto’s anger, Rin’s panic, the worry of his underclassmen, or Sousuke’s hatred ever again.
“My brother didn’t drag him along, you know.”
Haruka didn’t think anyone was watching him until he heard Gou behind him. She waved to him and continued, “Sousuke came to our house this morning and said ‘Take me to the graduation’. We were pretty shocked!”
“I went to the Samezuka graduation. He just wanted to go and return the favor with Rin.”
She frowned and shook her head. “That’s probably not it. My brother told him that you’d be going to the same college he was. I think he wanted the chance to talk to you so that you two could start fresh before college.”
Haruka’s expression appeared less cold. He blinked owlishly. “I’m not his friend.”
“But you could be.” Gou grinned encouragingly, going behind him to nudge him forward. “It wouldn’t hurt to try, Haruka-senpai.”
Haruka set his foot down, watching Rin and Sousuke get further away from him. Gou walked back around, disappointed when she realized that he wasn’t moving.
“To be honest…my brother is worried about Sousuke,” She said in hopes of convincing him. “When he left for Australia, Sousuke tore up his shoulder, so he’s worried that something bad will happen again if someone isn’t there to look after him. He was relieved when he found out you’d be there to keep an eye on him.”
“Sousuke can take care of himself,” Haruka replied. “He doesn’t need me to do anything.”
“He’s going to need you on that team more than you think.” Gou argued, getting annoyed with Haruka’s attitude. “And I have a feeling that you’re going to need him too.”
Haruka visibly tensed up. He let Rin and Sousuke get far enough away to the point that he could no longer see them.
He then stepped forward.