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Teyla hurried across the field, her white skirts flapping briskly behind her. She was late for the meeting that she had called and was determined to not let the others wait any longer than they had to for her to show up. This meeting was far overdue already. It had been a sennight and more since Rodney had come to the Collegium. She reached the salle, pulled open the door and slipped in. "I do apologize for my tardiness," she said slightly breathlessly to the people who had been patiently waiting for her, "I was detained by Councilor Woolsey over a matter that he wished to speak about at some length and it took me some time to remove myself gracefully from the conversation."
Ronon snorted as he leaned against one of the walls. "You would have gotten here earlier if you'd just kneed him in the nuts."
Teyla's lips curved into a smile despite herself. "Doubtless. However, if I had done so, he would then be much less likely to listen to me during Council sessions and I need all the allies that I can muster," she remonstrated gently as she came over and sat on one of the handy benches. Particularly since they're having their annual conniption fit over John, Charin commented to her acidly. Teyla's smile hardened. Yes, she agreed, thickening her shields so that her anger would not leak out to the others.
She turned to where Dame Heightmeyer was seated and inclined her head politely. "I thank you for taking the time to come to this meeting. I am sure that we are impinging on your busy schedule, so if you would care to speak first?"
Dame Heightmeyer smiled and folded her together on her lap. "It's no trouble, Queen's Own. My duties for the evening have been taken over by one of my daughters and so I have the time to spare." Her smile faded. "Master McKay is...a challenge...to teach. I am afraid he came from a family that neglected him quite badly on the issue of how to treat others with courtesy and so now he has to overcome many years of bad habits. He speaks the truth as he sees it, plainly and without any softening for how others may feel. He is trying, very hard, in my classes, but he lags behind the others because he is lacking the basics that others already come to the class with." She smiled wistfully. "It is, in a way, refreshing to see that kind of honesty, but it will do him ill in court."
Teyla sighed. She'd figured as much. "Thank you Dame Heightmeyer." She tilted her head in thought briefly, then asked, "It sounds as if some extra tutoring in what you call the basics would help him. Do you concur?"
Dame Heightmeyer shrugged elegantly. "It would certainly not harm him, if his schedule permits. I can see that he is becoming frustrated with his fumblings."
"I will look into it," Teyla replied. "I do not wish to overwhelm him with lessons, but if he is losing patience because of a perceived lack of progress, some extra help would probably help calm him."
Dame Heightmeyer nodded her acquiescence and then Teyla turned to Herald Paul. "Paul, how is he doing in your class?"
Paul nervously straightened up from from his slouch. "Pretty much the same as what I told you after his first day, ma'am. He's doing the work, but he just doesn't get politics. It's the honesty thing again, I think."
Teyla smiled wryly. "You may be correct. Etiquette and politics both require that you be able lie pleasantly. I believe that Rodney has never once been required to do so." Paul nodded in agreement with her. "Do you think some extra help would be in order?"
Paul scratched his head for a moment. "Maybe," he said reluctantly. "Some folks just never develop a head for politics. He might be one of them." He shrugged. "Personally, I'd wait and see if the extra help in Etiquette and Deportment provides him with an insight in interpersonal relations first. That may be the source of his problems in my class. He's not exactly a people person, you know."
Teyla raised a wry eyebrow. "Yes, I had heard," she replied dryly. Paul ducked his head in discomfort at having said something so blindingly obvious. "We will hold off on providing any extra tutoring for your class for the time being, then," Teyla said as he nodded his agreement with her.
She then turned to look at Ronon. "Ronon?"
Ronon shrugged. "He hasn't got any bad habits that I've needed to break him of, but he's not a natural either." He shrugged again. "He's trying, but he's probably never going to be very good at hand to hand. Might be pretty good at throwing knives, we'll see." He got a far off look in his face for a moment, then focused back on her. "T'ealc thinks the he lives in his head too much. I agree."
Teyla nodded in acknowledgment. It was rare that T'ealc weighed in with an opinion, but it was always a well considered one when he did. "I will keep that in mind, Ronon, thank you."
The door opened up again and Carson bustled in wearing stained Greens. "Sorry I'm late. We had an emergency to deal with and I was just able to get away."
Teyla rose from her seat and clasped one of his hands in hers. "I had only just arrived myself, Carson. I am glad you could make it. I hope all is well?"
"Ach, just one of the pages getting a bit too rambunctious and falling from a window. A couple broken bones and tears galore, but he will be fine," Carson replied, squeezing her hand before letting go and sitting down on a nearby bench.
Teyla resumed her seat and returned her attention to Ronon. "Does he need any extra lessons with you on self defense?"
Ronon grunted at the thought and then said, "Maybe later. I'm pushing him to his limit right now. He's lead a life on his ass up till now and he's not in the best of shape."
Teyla took his assessment in with a nod. "We will defer that for later then." She then looked at the three who had given her reports and said, "Thank you for taking the time to come and apprise me of the situation. You have my gratitude. I have things of a more sensitive nature to discuss with rest, so if you do not mind?"
Herald Paul and Dame Heightmeyer both murmured polite negatives, assuring her that they did not mind at all. Paul then held out a hand to Dame Heightmeyer and assisted her up from her seat and escorted her out of the salle. Ronon simply slanted an eyebrow at her and then stalked off to his rooms in the back of the building.
Teyla turned to Carson. "Since you are now here, could you please tell me if Rodney has spoken to you any more since our last discussion? I regret that I have not yet had an opportunity to speak with him, but there have been many demands on my time as of late." She repressed a sigh. She truly wished to speak with their newest trainee, but events kept conspiring against her. She mentally cursed the pig-headed bastards of the Council again.
Carson's face grew long with regret. "He's clammed up on me. I haven't managed to get a thing out of him since that one day. He bites out an 'I'm fine' then finds an excuse to leave. The bloody bastard has always had the thickest natural shields I've ever seen in my life and they've only gotten thicker since he started working on his Gift. I'm not picking up anything off of him. I'm beginning to regret having complained about his whinging all these years. But I can tell you that a quiet Rodney is not a happy Rodney, and he's much, much too quiet for me."
"I have been unable to pick up anything from him either," Teyla said, troubled. She'd only encountered one other individual who was able to shield their emotions away from empaths with any degree of success. Her eyes flicked over to the last person she'd asked to the meeting.
John was leaning against a wall, covered in shadows as the evening deepened in the unlit salle. His shielding was as smooth as glass, like always when she tried to see if he was troubled. It was annoying. It was aggravating. It made Teyla want to scream in frustration, but she tamped it down as she always did when it came to John. She'd learned to read his body language over the years in order to compensate and she could see that he was tense. She cursed in the name of the Ancestors. He'd likely gotten wind of what the Council was up to again. "John?" she said, wishing that he would, for once, accept her reassurances. It was a futile wish.
John shoved himself away from the wall and stepped out of the shadows. He stuck his hands in his pockets and drawled, "He's doing alright in class. Still rides like a sack of potatoes, but he's getting better. Main problem is that he and Cadman aren't exactly getting along. I've never seen a Companion and Herald aggravate each other that much before."
He hasn't let Cadman in yet, Charin said softly. And in her youthfulness, she does not realize that her perkiness is grating. The pairing was not...optimal...but there are reasons for it. We are doing what we can on our end, but frankly it will take time. To be blunt, Cadman needs to grow up a little more. She is younger than we would have liked for a pairing of this nature.
Teyla was surprised by Charin's revelation. The Companions as a rule kept the whys of their Choosing a close secret. She shifted uneasily on the bench. Thank you, Charin. I will see what I can do to convince Rodney to be a bit more tolerant of her exuberance.
She returned her attention outward and caught John giving her a knowing smirk. She turned back to Carson. "If you would please continue to be available for Rodney, I would appreciate it. He may be more forthcoming if not pressed. Unfortunately I cannot be everywhere at this time and I need you as a companionable shoulder for him to lean on should he require it."
Carson dipped his head. "Certainly, love. He'll have my ear anytime he wants it." He stood up and straightened his robes. "If that's all, would you mind excusing me, love? I've a patient to check up on. His mum is a friend of mine and it makes her rest easier knowing I'm keeping an eye on him."
Teyla rose up and gripped his arms with a smile. "Certainly, Carson. I would never keep you from your patients." She leaned forward and he did the same and their foreheads touched together. There weren't many in the city that she gave the traditional parting of her people to, and she was honored to count Carson as one of them. "I will speak with you again later."
Carson smiled. "Later, love." Then he slipped out of the door and into the twilight outside. Soon it would be full night, Teyla noted absently, and she still had another meeting with Elizabeth after this one. She wished that there were two of her. There were simply not enough hours in the day for all that she needed to do recently.
John went to saunter past her toward the door. She reached out and grabbed him by the arm, stopping his progress. His eyes flicked up at hers warily. "I take it this means you're not done with me yet, Queen's Own?"
"Not yet," she agreed. "Please...sit with me."
John gently disengaged her hand from his arm and pulled a bench in front of hers and sat down as she did. "Whatcha need?" he asked cautiously.
"What I said to Carson applies to you as well, John," Teyla said, sitting back down. "I am pulled in a hundred different directions at this time and I need all the assistance I can garner in dealing with Rodney. I will make space in my schedule tomorrow to speak with Rodney about his classes and Cadman, but I am unable at this time to leave the Queen's side for very long and I fear that it will not be enough. He is struggling, that much I see." She sighed and pulled a lock of hair out of her eyes. "A pox take all of the Council!" Teyla said fervently. She was so very tired of this nonsense that the Council kept going through. If she had her druthers, she would have disposed of Councilors Landry and Caldwell in one of the more noisome alleys of Haven long ago. It was most unfortunate that they held such influence and sway over the Council.
"I'm sorry, Teyla," John said softly, looking intently at his boots.
She reached out and laid a hand over his knee. "You have nothing to apologize for. They are being bigoted and blind."
John turned his head and looked out into the shadows, newly risen moonlight from the clerestory windows gleaming across his jawline. "He doesn't sleep well at night. My nightmares wake him up, or disturb him as he tries to fall asleep," he said suddenly, still staring out into the dark.
Teyla held her breath. John never spoke of his nightmares, not even to say that he had them.
"I tried to get him another room where I wouldn't disturb him, but he refused. Said he'd wind up keeping other people awake." John went silent for a while. Teyla waited him out. "I hear him when I can't sleep. He paces, a lot." He turned to look at her, his eyes dark. "Because of Cadman, he's trapped in a place where he doesn't want to be and feels he doesn't fit in at."
"I see," Teyla said softly. It was inexplicable to her as to why Cadman had Chosen a man settled and happy in his career and lacking so many of the usual skills of a Herald. It was necessary, Charin said regretfully. If it were not, we'd have never...sacrifices must be made for the sake of the kingdom.
Sacrifices, she thought grimly. Yes, they all made those. She simply hoped that it would not break Rodney to make them. "John," she said hesitantly, "help me. What do you think would make him feel less trapped? I do not want him to be miserable with us."
John got up and walked away from her, rubbing the back of his neck with a hand. "Geez, Teyla, I don't know! I'm not Queen's Own, you are!"
Teyla stood up and walked over to him. The moonlight cut a broad swath across his narrow shoulders. She could see the tenseness of them. "I can no longer read his emotional state any more, John. His shields have grown too thick now that he's aware of them. I cannot read him, John, just as I cannot read you. And of all of us, you have the closest experience of what he is going through now." She continued on inexorably, "As Queen's Own, I ask, no, I demand that that you bring your thoughts to bear on the matter! It is becoming more and more obvious that Rodney is to have great import to the kingdom. It does us ill to fumble in our treatment of him." She hated to push him like this, but John was slightly empathic when he wasn't thinking about it. She knew that she was possibly grasping at straws, but perhaps he'd been able to pick up something from Rodney that trained empaths like Carson and herself could not.
John's head dropped, then his hand. His back tightened more. "We've played chess a couple of times. Some of the things he's not...quite...said lead me to believe that he feels cut adrift without his old work. We could let him teach again. Give him something back of his old life to make it easier. Give him an anchor."
Teyla gave the suggestion due consideration. "I believe that could be done. It would necessitate taking him off housework duty, but I believe I can convince Dean Daniel to allow it."
John snorted as he stared off into a darkened corner of the room. "Yeah, Daniel's a good guy and all, but he really doesn't know what to do when a considerably older trainee comes through. I don't think Rodney's cut out for peeling roots in the kitchen at his age."
"It teaches humility to those who think themselves better than others," Teyla rejoined.
John turned slightly and looked at her over his shoulder, "Rodney, a guy who prides himself on his intelligence, thanks to Cadman is now taking classes in stuff he's not good at, with a bunch of kids young enough for him to have fathered, who are naturally much better at it than he is. I think he's plenty humbled, don't you?"
Put that way, Teyla could see that the traditional way of dealing with a trainee was putting an undue strain on Rodney's self esteem. "You are right," she said, dropping her eyes. "I am ashamed that I did not see that immediately myself."
John turned around completely and reached out a placating hand. "Hey, hey! You've had the delegation from Rethwellan to deal with, planning of the relief efforts for the flooding in the north, the Council all over your ass, and I don't know what all else to deal with! You can't be everywhere, you said so yourself."
She looked back up at him with fire in her eyes. "John, I am Queen's Own. It is my job to see this!"
"And now you have!" John said with an emphatic gesture. "You'll do what you need to and everything will be okay. Don't beat yourself up about it, he isn't broken or anything. Cadman would let us know if he were in crisis. Even as bad as it is between them right now, she'd be able to tell." His eyes glazed over for a moment and then he blinked. "Huh. Atlantis says she'd tell me if she thought he was in trouble."
I would inform you as well, Charin said calmly to her. John has the right of it. Rodney is certainly stressed right now, but he is made of sterner stuff than anyone, including himself, gives him credit for.
Teyla matched John's confused look with one of her own. Companions taking interest in a Herald not their own was unheard of to her. Teyla knew not what to think. More and more it seemed that Rodney was something very special indeed. "It seems that Charin would inform me as well if there were something wrong with Rodney."
John's eyes widened at that. "This is weird. Why are the Companions getting so involved?"
"I do not know," she replied, troubled. "I do not know."