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Rodney leaned tiredly against Cadman, staring at his feet as they slowly walked to the Healery. After he had finally remembered to tuck his legs properly as he rolled the last few times, the Weaponsmaster had at last released him from his assigned torture with an order to get a jar of muscle salve and take a hot bath so his muscles wouldn't stiffen up. Rodney snorted. He would have taken a bath regardless. He was a sweaty, stinking mess. He just hoped that he had enough energy left to prevent himself from falling asleep in the tub and drowning.
You did good in weapons class, Rodney, Cadman said encouragingly.
I sucked donkey doo, Rodney replied, too tired to be snide, but trying anyways. Don't lie to me. I know I'm terrible at this kind of stuff. Your sugarcoating it won't change facts.
We can't lie mind to mind, Rodney, Cadman shot back, annoyed. You did do good in weapons class. You learned how to fall correctly, didn't you?
No, I just finally fucking remembered to tuck my damned legs after forty million attempts, Rodney slung back at her. I was at it for hours before I could do one simple thing right! He sighed, and gripped her neck a little more tightly with the arm he had wrapped over it as he took another leaden step forward. Listen, I'm so tired I can't even walk in a straight line, much less deal with you. Can we just drop it?
But Rodney... she began.
Cadman! he replied warningly. I'm too tired to physically yell at you, but I'm more than capable of yelling at you mentally for the rest of the damned day. Just drop it, will you? I'm taking the damned classes like a good little Heraldic trainee. Doesn't mean I want to talk about them after they're over.
Cadman gave a resigned sigh. Have it your way, hotshot. She stopped and turned her head to nudge him gently in the side. We're here. Shall I...
Rodney raised his head just as a man in healer greens staring intently into a book came out of the door to the building and walked right into Cadman. The man blinked, then said, "Oh excuse me, love. I wasn't watching where I was going. Is there something I could do..." the man's eyes then locked on Rodney and he dropped his book as his eyes bugged out. "Rodney?! Rodney McKay what the...what are you...you've been bloody Chosen, man!"
Rodney gave him an annoyed look. "You're just now finding this out, Carson? I've been the main sideshow attraction for three days, now. Where the hell have you been? Under a rock?"
Carson shot him a fulminating look as he crossed his arms defensively. "I'll have you know I just got back into the city from visiting me mum back home, you daft git! She's been feeling poorly and I went to see what I could do for her."
"Did she send back any of those cookies she makes?" Rodney asked, distracted by the possibility of Carson's mother's homebaked goods. They had peculiar accents in that part of the kingdom, but boy could they bake.
"Yes, she did. And I'm not giving you any until you tell me what happened you! When I left, you were at the Compass Rose insulting Radek like you had been for the past ten years!" Carson said, picking his book back up.
Rodney released his grip on Cadman's neck and took a slow, exhausted step forward. "Fine, fine. But can we do it inside? Preferably after you've gotten me a jar of muscle salve? "
Carson rolled his eyes and said, "Rodney you can't pull a muscle taking a class in politics."
"For your information, Carson," Rodney replied with gritted teeth, "I've been in weapons training class throwing myself at the damned floor for the last couple of hours."
Carson blinked then looked at him closely. He then flushed with embarrassment. "Oh. I'm sorry, Rodney. You really are sore, aren't you?"
Rodney limped past him into the healery, Carson following him and closing the door behind them. "No, I just limp around because I think it makes me look cool. Why yes, Carson, I am sore, thank you very much! I don't even know why I ever bother to show up here, you never take my health issues seriously," he finished with a grumble as he sank into one of the chairs.
"It's because you're always whinging about nothing, ye damned hypochondriac," Carson muttered under his breath. He set down his book, went over to a cabinet on the other side of the room and pulled out a sealed jar of muscle salve. He set the jar onto a tray that had a pitcher on it as well as some cups, and then picked up the tray and brought it over to the table next to where Rodney sat. "Have some iced peppermint tea and tell me what happened while I was away," Carson said, pouring a cup of tea, handing it to Rodney and sitting down next to him.
"Cadman happened, Carson," Rodney sighed, setting aside the cup of tea untouched. "One minute I was minding my own business, working on one of my projects at the Compass Rose, and the next thing I knew I was enrolled at the Herald's Collegium as a trainee." He snorted tiredly. "A student again. At my age." He ran a hand over his face briefly and continued. "And now I'm trying to learn – as if I were actually able to do any of this crap – horsemanship, politics and fighting." He gave a bitter chuckle. "I'd almost find it funny if it had happened to someone like that smug bastard Kavenagh."
You are able! You're doing fine. Cadman interjected.
Rodney turned his head toward the shut door and snarled, "Shut up, Cadman!" before turning back to Carson. "Stupid horse keeps telling me that I'm 'doing fine' and that I'll 'get the hang of it'," he said, making air quotes with his fingers. "She's only saying that because she Chose me and is too stubborn to admit that she made a mistake!" he shouted the last bit toward the door. Seriously, she annoyed the crap out of him with her relentlessly positive attitude.
Because I didn't, you annoying asshole! Cadman shouted back. Rodney, the kingdom needs you, she added more calmly.
Rodney rolled his eyes, muttered, "Right. As arrow fodder," and slumped sullenly in his chair. "Ow," he said, and then straightened back up, sat forward and rubbed at the small of his back and neck with his hands. His back was killing him.
Carson was used to only hearing one half of a conversation between Heralds and their Companions and seemed to get the gist of the argument that the two of them were having. He gave Rodney a sober look. "I take it that you're not terribly pleased with this turn of events, then?"
Rodney tilted his head in Carson's direction and gave him a sardonic look. "No, I'm ecstatic, Carson. I'm so happy I could piss my pants. Of course I'm not pleased! I'm too old for this nonsense, and it's not like I'm going to be any good at it. What am I going to do, lecture a guy to death when he's trying to kill me? Havens, I can't even get how to fall on the damned ground correctly." Rodney abruptly stopped talking and then rubbed a hand over his face. He hadn't meant to say that. This stiff upper lip thing was harder than it sounded.
"Rodney?" Carson said softly.
"Okay, now that we've had this entirely unpleasant and pointless conversation over that swill you call tea, I think I'll just take my salve and go." Rodney said quickly as he levered himself up out of the chair with a painful grunt. Gods, he hurt. Even the short rest he'd had in the chair had allowed him to stiffen up.
Carson stood up with him, and grabbed one of his elbows to steady him. "Rodney, are you okay?"
"I'm tired, I'm sore and I stink," Rodney replied tiredly, waving away the help with one hand.
Carson persisted in holding on to his elbow. "No, seriously, lad. Are you okay? You don't sound happy."
"Happy?" Rodney repeated, his voice hollow. What a question to ask. And he had thought that Carson knew him better than that. "I was happy at the Compass Rose." The corner of his mouth turned down. "I was...useful. Productive. The best engineer in the kingdom, if I do say so myself." He was silent for a moment, then wrenched his elbow away from Carson's grip. "Now look at me." He swept both hands down his body, demonstrating the gray uniform. "Valdemar's oldest, most laughable Heraldic trainee." He turned away before he could say anything else embarrassing and picked up the jar of salve from the tray on the table. "I gotta go, Carson," he said, not looking at the healer. "If I don't get into a tub of hot water soon, my muscles are going to lock up and I'll turn into a statue where I stand."
Rodney limped out the door to the waiting Companion, deliberately ignoring the pitying look Carson was giving him.