Chapter Text
Out of all the drafts he’d thought he’d be forced to complete, the one for war wasn’t high on the list. Henry dropped the notice on his kitchen table with shaky hands. Three weeks. He’d have three weeks before he’d be shipped overseas to fight the goddamn Germans. It felt like the floor was falling out from under him. He really might never come back. Even if he got to serve as a medic or even a damn autopool repair man, he could still never come back. His legs finally collapsed underneath him, thin body hitting the linoleum.
There was so much!! So much he’d never gotten to do, or see, or tell or feel. Who knew if he’d even get to now? There was barely any time left to fit an entire lifetime into! What did he even want to do? And who could he do it with? He’d been perpetually single after his last college relationship with Linda ended. His list of friends wasn’t the longest either. Joey was an insane workaholic that only really saw him as a meal ticket these days and Norman was a homebody with a family to take care of. A family. He’d never get to find love or have a family.
Henry rolled over onto his side, taking his glasses off and wrapping his arms around himself. His cheek pressed against the cold floor kept him grounded. It felt wrong, in a way. To be surrounded by a home he was going to have to leave soon. Like now that he’d gotten the notice he was no longer welcome in his own four walls. The cold bite of the floor seeped through his clothes, adding to the ache in his chest. Aside from what he’d never gotten to do; who would do what only he could from now on? Would the studio suffer or go under because of him having to leave? How many people might lose their jobs because of him?
Sitting up was a challenge a now quietly sobbing Henry could barely manage. He was so scared. He’d seen the scars veterans of the first Great War bore. What would he come back with, if he even did? Would he be able to walk? To draw? At least that was something he could get out of his system. Couldn’t conjure up friends or loved ones but Henry could spit drawings out in his sleep. Always knew Joey would work him into an early grave, but maybe it wasn’t so bad a proposition as it used to be. Better than a bullet from a facist.
Henry pulled himself off the floor, using the kitchen table to get him to his feet. He really looked around the place for a second. Mostly bare walls, save for a few Bendy prints, new and barely used appliances. He wasn’t home enough to use them and now; they didn’t even feel like they were his anymore. The entire place felt like it’d had the warmth sucked from it. Just a shell he was being forced to discard along with the rest of him.
Might as well get it over with. He moved through his place to pack a bag with some clothes and a few snacks as fast as he could. Couldn’t stand to be here anymore surrounded by the life he wasn’t going to get to see play out. Took the notice along too, since he’d have to show Joey and give him the bad news. And just like that, Henry was headed back to the office at 23:00.
His office was much more welcoming, for some reason. He’d be giving it up as much as he would his house but it felt safer in here; surrounded by his works, past and current. It had the weight of responsibility but not the weight of what could be. A familiar pressure compared to an all encompassing crush that he needed to push off if he was ever going to get anything done.
“Alright, Henry. You have three weeks to not only outwork but leave Joey in your dust. Something you’ve always wanted to get done and this is the perfect chance.” He’d never been the best at looking on the bright side. The animator set the notice on his desk to show to Joey in the morning and went off to get a coffee, cursed paper forgotten for the moment. Wondered if there was a shower or something here so he didn’t have to go ho- to his house again.
Most of the office lights were off, but Henry could still see a few on. Grant typing away at his typewriter and Wally’s obnoxious off tune singing made for great anchors. Just another busy night with nothing horrible weighing him down.
“Mr Stein! What are ya doin here, I thought ya left!” Guess Wally had noticed him.
“Just forgot a few things.” He offered the younger man a tired smile that the other shot right back. “If anything, shouldn’t you be the worried one? I know how hard you get chewed out by the higher ups,” Henry joked, Wally noticeably paleing.
“You ain’t gonna tell em I lost my keys again, are ya?” Wally nervously drummed his fingers on his broomstick handle. He’d be so outta here if he kept getting in trouble for little stuff like this.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Henry shot Wally a wink. He was good at keeping his mouth shut and the janitor knew it. Kept his mouth shut about the blow out shouting matches he and Sammy Lawrence would get into. For a second in command, Henry sure was a background character.
“Oh! Can ya do me a favor since you’re here?” Wally patted his pockets and pulled out a letter. “This was from Mr Drew to uh, I think he said either Sammy or Grant. I ain’t supposed to open it so I can’t check an I kinda forgot which one of em it was for. Mind passin it along?” He handed the letter to Henry who reluctantly took it.
“You’re scared of both of them, aren’t you?”
“Scared of em as I am hellfire! Thanks a heap, Mr Stein! I’ll be seein ya!” Wally turned the corner before Henry could even try to push the job back onto Franks. Sure. He’d be a damned errand boy, why not? It'd give him an excuse to talk to Sammy and he'd always appreciate another one of those. The man was a fright but he sure was a pretty one.
He headed down the hall, stopping by his office to drop his mug off since the coffee was gone. One less thing for Sammy to throw at him on his way out. They didn’t hate each other by any means, if anything they were on pretty friendly terms. Had a great work relationship that bordered on being actual friends, which is why Henry knew how Sammy could get both in the evenings and when he was interrupted. The man valued his work above most else.
A quick walk through the music department showed that Sammy was in his office for once instead of the recording studio. Might have a harder time not getting his head bitten off here. He knocked on the door and entered before he could think better of it.
“It’s Henry, don’t shoot.” Probably in poor taste to say given the circumstances, but Sammy didn’t know that. “Surprised you’re still here.”
“If you thought I wasn’t going to be here, why did you come?” Sammy huffed, finally turning to Henry after a few more angry strokes with his fountain pen. He set the thing down when he was done, getting up and coming closer to Henry so they could chat. “Sorry, this is the fifth revision of this tune and I’m sick of Joey’s bullshit ‘musical opinions’ when he can’t even whistle.” They both shared a tired Joey Drew Studios tired smile, Henry feeling a bit warmer than before.
“I missed you,” Henry was surprised by even his own bluntness. Guess impending death by Nazi did that to a guy. “What’s wrong with making sure you’re taking care of yourself? You’re practically a twig as it is.” They both shared a laugh, Sammy leaning against the wall and Henry against the door frame. This was nice. Warm, felt right.
“I didn’t know you’d run off and become a doctor in the three days since I’ve seen you. What else did you learn in medical school?” Sammy leaned in a fraction and Henry laughed, playfully pushing his shoulder.
“I learned that you should be eating more apples to keep the doctor away. Shame I don’t have one for you. Bet your organs are shriveled from how little you feed em.”
“I wouldn’t eat it anyhow. Then you might not come back,” He shoved Henry back, the shorter grinning up at the blond. It’d been a while since they talked like this. He’d really miss it. Miss it. Right. That cold stab of realization brought Henry back to why he was here.
“Here, this is for you. Wally asked me to pass it along from Joey but said he couldn’t remember if you or someone else was supposed to get it.” He handed Sammy the letter, the other grumbling. If it was from Joey it wasn't good.
“Here’s to hoping this is for some other poor disgruntled employee,” Sammy tossed it on his desk and turned back to Henry. He was looking a little pale. “Maybe you’re the one who needs a doctor. Are you feeling alright?” He moved to give Henry’s shoulder a squeeze. The animator swayed on his feet a bit at the touch, clearly not all there.
“I’m fine Sammy, just a little tired is all.” He gave the hand on his shoulder what he hoped was a reassuring squeeze. Sammy did not look reassured.
“If you’re ‘fine’ why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost? Do you need to sit down?”
“I think I’ll just head back up to my office and take a breather for a minute. Don’t wanna be an interruption or anything. Thanks though,” he gave Sammy’s hand another squeeze before he pulled back to leave the man’s office.
“You know where to find me if you want a coffee or a cigarette.” Sammy offered Henry another of his rare smiles that was happily returned. Henry knew he’d miss Sammy so much. After leaving Sammy’s office Henry wandered back to his own. Those warm moments made the cold ones seem all the more bitter.
When he got back, Henry couldn’t bring himself to work. That ache in his chest wouldn’t go down or away no matter how many concept sketches he’d try and start. Normally he’d get an idea and go off of it from there. Maybe drawing something else would work? Something that wasn’t related to Bendy for once? He pulled out a smaller sketchbook from his desk drawer and started to sketch the cause of this ache; Sammy.
Lawrence made for an interesting subject to draw. Long hair for a man that was always tied up in low ponytails, a tightness in his shoulders that warned onlookers of how close he was to snapping at any one of them. The way he’d smirk when Wally walked into door or when he’d said something particularly awful. How soft his eyes got when he talked to Henry. And how that probably meant nothing, would mean nothing now that he’d be leaving. He hadn’t even realized he’d been crying until that first drop hit the page, lines blurring before him.
The ache only grew with his work marred, but he didn’t give up. Even with tears streaming down his face like a waterfall, he wanted a way to take a bit of Sammy with him. A bit of the warmth he’d never get to explore the depth of. One more bitter reminder of what couldn’t be.
***
After the animator left his office Sammy tried to get back to work. The end of that interaction didn’t sit right with him. Why the hell did he go from normal to looking like he was about to pass out. Hadn’t said anything bad enough to be that offensive, did he? That comment about wanting him to come back had been a bit forward but not enough to warrant that kind of reaction. Plus, he smiled afterward. That was a good sign, right?
Sammy groaned at this little mystery, taking his hair out of its usual ponytail so he could run his fingers through it in frustration. If he were better at talking to people he might just go ask Henry himself. Might be good to check up on him anyway, just in case. If that was some kind of medical issue he could be passed out and need some help. Sammy put his hand on the desk to push himself up when a crinkle underneath his hand caught his attention.
Ah, that’s right; he hadn’t opened the letter Henry’d given him.
Henry really shouldn’t be kept waiting so Sammy decided to quickly skim the letter. Might not even be for him in the first place. Upon opening the envelope he could tell right away that it wasn’t. Tax paper after tax paper spilled out, receipts falling to the floor. Looks like this was meant for Grant or someone else in accounting. Better check with Henry and check on him. Two birds with one stone. With all the papers tucked neatly back in their place, Sammy went off to find poor Henry. He took the stairs two at a time, his hair brushing his shoulders reminding him that he hadn’t tied it back up. Wondered if Henry would notice, or maybe even like it.
Sammy made it to the animation department in record time, all the offices dark save for one. Henry sure was dedicated and no one could ever say differently. With a soft knock, Sammy walked into the dead silent office.
“Hey Hen; turns out this letter wasn’t for- are you okay?!” Henry quickly slammed his sketchbook closed, throwing it into his top desk drawer and slamming the thing shut. He managed to hide whatever he was drawing but not the tears streaming down his face in waves. Sammy crossed the room in two strides, leaning over the animator’s desk to get a closer look at him. He looked like he’d been crying for some time.
“Hey, did something happen?” God, Sammy was awful at comforting people. As much as he wanted to be here for Henry he wasn’t sure how to be.
Henry furiously wiped the tears off his face with his sleeves, unable to even look at Sammy, let alone meet his eyes. “It’s nothing Sammy, just don’t worry about it. You said the letter wasn’t for you?” Henry reached to take it and Sammy pulled the thing away.
“Clearly this has to be something if it affected you this much. Do you need to take some time off? I’m sure Joey would understand if you needed to take some time at ho-”
“I do not want to go anywhere and I’m fine, Sammy. You don’t have anything you need to worry about.” Henry’s normally calm hazel eyes were rimmed red and raw. He’d definitely been crying for a while. Sammy went to drop the letter on the desk and comply with Henry’s demand when another paper caught his eye. He and Henry noticed it at the same time but Sammy was faster in the grab for it. This was a draft notice. Oh, Christ.
He turned to Henry, so many emotions flooding through him. Sorrow, regret, desperation, fear, so much fear for the man before him. He knew war, though not personally. His father had served in the Great War and while he did come home, the man that returned was not his father. Not in his head or heart at least. Sammy felt a tear run down his cheek at the memory, and at history about to repeat itself.
“Were you planning on hiding this from everyone except Joey?” He asked, voice shaking as he handed the notice back to Henry. Said animator didn’t respond. He took the notice and set it back on his desk without a sound. “Well? Were you really going to leave all of us without a word?” ‘Leave me’ went unsaid but well felt.
“Of course I was going to say something, I just didn’t know how to or when.” Henry couldn’t meet Sammy’s eyes again. This wasn’t how he wanted Sammy to find out, let alone wasn’t the reaction he was expecting. Maybe an ‘I’ll miss seeing you around the office’ at most, not a near seething blond in his office about to hit the ceiling if he said the wrong word. Something he seemed to already have done.
“You didn’t know when? How about right away!? And don’t you dare think I’m saying this for the sake of the damn company. A lot of people around here are going to miss you, damn it.” Sammy took a step forward, and Henry one back. “Why the hell are you even here!? You should have jumped ship the second you got this!” Sammy picked the notice back up and waved it in front of Henry’s face. Another step forward and another step back.
“I just got it today, I swear! I wasn’t trying to keep anything from anyone, I just wanted to talk to Joey about it in the morning and see what he wanted to do,” Henry didn’t know why he felt like he had to explain himself to Sammy. He was just a coworker, technically one beneath him on the food chain too. It all just kept coming out before he could shut himself up. “I swear I would have said something once I knew how Joey wanted to handle things.” One step forward, one back. His back hit the wall.
“And what are you doing here, then? You waste away in this cartoon hell with us day in and day out, why are you giving them this time?” Sammy loomed over Henry, arms crossed, eyes boring holes through him. Henry could feel himself start to sweat.
“I just- with the movie coming out, I don’t want the animation styles to be inconsistent. I know they’ll have to hire a new lead animator when I’m gone; but if I get as much work as I can done, it won’t be as noticeable. I just have to get the rough outlines down.” He tried for a smile but it only hardened Sammy’s glare.
“Do I look like Joseph fucking Drew to you? Do you think you have to suck the dick that is his ego in front of me like I’m some kind of voyeur for ass kissing? Why are you really here at one in the fucking morning and if you say ‘the movie’ I swear I’ll blow a fuse.” Sammy impatiently drummed his fingers against his bicep while waiting for an answer from a clearly staring Henry. “Do I have ink on my face or something?”
“No; I’ve just never seen you with your hair down before.” It looked softer than when it was up and Henry’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to touch it. An early death that would be well worth it; no war and he’d get to experience something he’d always wanted to. Sammy did not look amused.
“If you’re trying to be cute or distract me it isn’t going to work. Why the hell are you here, Henry?”
“You really know how to put a guy between a rock and a hard place, huh Sammy?” Henry was starting to sweat a bit. This was too close. Both too close a call to talking about his feelings and too close to Sammy for too long. He could get out of his awkward spot if he needed to but with Sammy less than a foot away, moving was probable.
“I also know how to put one six feet under. Now are you going to tell me or am I going to have to demonstrate?”
“I really don’t think talking about it’s a good idea, Sammy. I’m just going to get back to work,” He tried to test his moving theory but Sammy stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, pushing him back to his spot against the wall.
“Why can’t you tell me?”
“Maybe because it’s not your business!”
“Or because you’re being a stalling coward. Spit it out already!” Sammy slammed his hands to either side of Henry’s head, using his superior height to tower over the animator. “Why the hell are you wasting your life here when you should be at home?!”
“BECAUSE I’M AFRAID!” Henry shouted, his hands shooting up to cover his eyes. The damn tears were back, his smaller shoulders shaking with the effort of keeping them back as much as he could. “I can’t stay in that house just to think and think and THINK. Think about all the things I’ll never get to do or see because they’re going to march me off to my,” he couldn’t say death. Sammy didn’t want to hear it either.
“I just can’t do it, Sammy. I can’t let myself be useless when it opens up too many cans of worms that I just can’t get into.” Henry pressed his palms into his eyes to hopefully stop the tears. Had the added bonus of not having to make eye contact with Sammy’s gorgeous eyes that were probably staring at him like he was pathetic. He felt pathetic for breaking down like this in front of someone he looked up to and respected.
“Just please don’t go telling everyone before I get a chance to tell Joey and I swear I’ll be out of the way.” He finally pulled his hands away from his eyes and saw something he didn’t expect; warmth. A mix of warmth and heartbreak that you could only feel after a serious loss. Sammy let out a deep sigh, taking a small step back and resting his hands on Henry’s shoulders.
“I’m sorry.” Sammy took another deep breath, not used to talking about his feelings. Or heavy topics like this. “I won’t say anything to anyone even if they ask me. But Henry? You can’t just stay here in the office for the next three weeks. You need somewhere you can shower and sleep.”
Henry huffed, knowing that the musician was right. As safe as his office felt, he knew that three weeks here was an impossibility. “I could always get a hotel. Use the last of my savings, or something. I won’t be needing it anyway.”
“Bullshit. You keep your damn money and just take my guest room.” Sammy pulled away then, Henry immediately missing the warmth he gave off. Not like he could afford to think like that. Sammy grabbed the duffle bag Henry’d thrown behind his file cabinets.
“I really couldn’t impose on you like that, having a guest for three weeks is-”
“Don’t remember asking you, Henry. Now let’s go; it's one in the morning still and I’d like my four hours of beauty sleep. You certainly could use yours.” Sammy tried for a smirk that Henry met with an eye roll and a laugh. He was really joking at a time like this?
“Are you absolutely sure you’d want to put me up for a whole three weeks?” The glare Henry found himself pinned with was as good enough an answer as any. Right then, time to shut up and grab his jacket.
“We just have to stop by my office so I can get my keys and then we can go,” Sammy opened the door and held it open for Henry. Had to hand it to him, he really knew how to treat people when he actually liked them. Henry quickly put on his jacket and made sure not to keep Sammy waiting. This was more patience than Henry’d seen Sammy exercise in their entire careers together and he wasn’t about to take it for granted.
They got the keys and headed down to the car park, Henry reaching for his bag and Sammy pulling it away. The animator raised a brow and tried again only to end up with the same result.
“Am I not allowed to get my keys or something?”
“You don’t need them. My apartment has limited parking so we’ll be leaving your car here.” Sammy put Henry’s bag in his trunk then opened Henry’s door, holding the thing open for him like he had with the office door.
“With this kind of service I might never leave,” Henry joked, hoping in and buckling up.
Sammy closed the door and headed over to the driver's side door. He was honestly tempted to make sure Henry didn’t leave. He was terrified for him and for what his leaving could mean. For the company, sure, but also for himself. Denial could only get him so far when that warm feeling in his chest kept growing around Henry.