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Malon was going to have a fit. Wild was sure of it. Not only had they just come out of a long, arduous battle, but they were out of healing supplies - including Hyrule’s magic.
Most of them were okay, with only a few bruises and shallow scratches, but others? Not so much.
Twilight had broken his ankle by roundhouse kicking a bokoblin in the face (he claimed he’d been disarmed and was out of ideas, because the others were watching so he couldn’t transform, apparently. Wild didn’t believe him). As such, he was currently being supported by Warriors and Sky as they slowly but surely made their way to Lon Lon Ranch.
Four wasn’t much better off, having received a nasty blow to the head. He was currently unconscious and being carried by Legend.
Wild himself had been on the receiving end of a moblin’s club, and he was pretty sure half his ribs were broken.
Time, though. Time was the worst off, and Wild was worried. After Four had been knocked out, Time had put himself between the shortest hero and the oncoming monsters. This had resulted in him having his ass handed to him by one of Legend’s Lynels and a handful of bokoblins from the Great Sea. Of course, Time was an absolute beast on the battlefield, no doubt about it, but even he couldn’t handle all that without taking some serious hits.
It was bad. It was really bad. There was so much blood, Wild wasn’t sure how Time was still alive. They’d run out of potions and fairies two days ago, and hadn’t had a chance to stock up since. Hyrule was pouring what was left of his energy into getting the Old Man stable, and Twilight, as well as being unable to walk, was having a panic attack. He kept gasping things about a mysterious “Hero’s Shade,” which was extremely interesting, but Wild wasn’t going to question him about it until he wasn’t freaking out. Instead Wild did his best to calm the Ordonian hero down, because it was about time he returned the favour.
Mere seconds after getting Twilight’s breathing under control, Hyrule passed out from exhaustion. There were a few tense moments while Warriors, the only one who was actually certified in first aid, checked on Time, then reassured them all by saying, “Hyrule didn’t let himself stop until the Old Man wasn’t about to pop off.”
This was met with both a sigh of relief and a few groans at Warriors’s phrasing.
They stayed where they were until Hyrule woke up again, then had Twilight call Epona so they could transport Time. As Wild was the only person who could ride a horse that wasn’t otherwise occupied (Warriors was helping Twilight walk, Twilight couldn’t look at Time without starting to hyperventilate, and Time wasn’t exactly in any condition to do much of anything), he found himself sitting on Epona behind Time, making sure the eldest hero didn’t fall off and subsequently hurt himself further.
Currently, they were about five minutes away from the ranch, and Wild was very worried about how Malon would react to them showing up riddled with injuries, and her husband possibly comatose. She’d be concerned, definitely. It was just a question of how concerned.
In the time he’d been pondering this, they’d arrived at the ranch. Wind knocked on the door of the house, then stepped back as the door opened.
Naturally, the first thing Malon saw was the unconscious Four, and she hurriedly ushered them in. The frown on her face deepened when she saw Twilight hobbling between Sky and Warriors.
And then Wild cleared his throat, and immediately wished he was blind.
The look on Malon’s face was utterly heartbreaking, somehow blending fear, despair, agony, and fury into one painful expression. She took a deep breath, clearly forcing herself into business mode, then helped Wild pull Time off of Epona.
“What happened?” she asked breathlessly.
“Bad fight with a ridiculous amount of powerful monsters,” Wild replied. “He was protecting Four.”
She nodded, hauling her husband into the house. “And how are the rest of you handling it?”
“Twi starts panicking every time he sees him. I think it has something to do with the Hero’s Shade, whatever that is.”
He could tell Malon knew what that was, if the way her eyes darkened was anything to go by.
“Okay,” she said. “Help me take him up to our bedroom. Unfortunately, I’m used to this kind of thing, and I keep red potions in the house at all times. We can give some to Twilight and Four as well.”
Business mode Malon was not someone to mess with. She snapped orders to Legend and Wind as they crossed the living room, then snapped some more orders to Warriors and Sky to help them carry Time up the stairs.
With the combined efforts of the four of them, it only took three minutes to manoeuvre Time up to the second floor and into the master bedroom. As soon as they had him settled on the bed, Malon sent Wild back down to grab a couple of red potions from the stash in the kitchen next to the cutlery drawer.
He’d barely made it to the bottom of the stairs when Legend shoved three bottles into his arms.
“I figured someone would come for these, so I grabbed them for you,” he said. “Twi’s humming a really depressing song and I want him to stop, but I don’t think he will until Time’s okay. Go make Time okay.”
Wild nodded, adjusting his grip on the potions, and went back upstairs. He took two steps into the room before Warriors snatched the potions, then ushered both Wild and Sky out and shut the door behind them.
“Well, alrighty then,” Sky said, staring at the door. “I guess we just wait? We should check in with the others, too.”
“You go ahead, I’ll stay up here. I want to…” Wild trailed off, his face flushing.
Sky just smiled knowingly, patted his shoulder soothingly, and departed.
Only a few minutes had passed when the door of the bedroom opened again, but with Wild’s patience? It felt like hours. Warriors stepped out, a tired grin gracing his features.
“I don’t know what kind of red potions Malon stocks, but it’s strong stuff. Time’s fine, he’s awake, but he’s resting. You can go in if you want,” he told Wild. He straightened his scarf. “Just… try not to laugh.”
Try not to laugh? What in Din’s name was Warriors talking about? Before Wild could ask, the captain hurried down the stairs, presumably to inform the others of Time’s recovery.
As soon as he entered the bedroom, he understood what Warriors had meant. He wasn’t entirely sure what he’d been expecting, but this… wasn’t it.
A single, ice blue eye blinked at him, and that about all he could see. The rest of the Hero of Time was completely swaddled in blankets, and Wild’s chef brain couldn’t help but compare it to a burrito. Malon was sitting on the bed next to the Time-ito, smiling radiantly at her husband’s predicament.
“Norr a wurr o thirr turr unywin, d’yurr unnersand?” Time ordered muffledly.
In response, Wild pulled out his Sheikah Slate and snapped a few artsy, but embarrassing photos.
“Wurd. Wurd, pluz. Uff the othurrs fund out, muh repuhtation wull be ruhined. C’mun, Wurd.”
Malon wrapped her arms around the Time-ito, and said, straight-faced, “Shut up, love.”
Later, Wild would neither confirm nor deny the sounds he made in a failed attempt to not laugh. The result of this was Time giving him the Glare of Disappointment, which was somehow still terrifying, despite the fact that Wild could only see Time’s eyes.
Somehow, even without the accompanying frown, the Glare was enough to make Wild delete all the pictures except one.
And showing that last picture to the rest of the Links was definitely worth Time sneaking brussels sprouts, which he knew Wild didn’t like, into every stir fry in the foreseeable future.
But in all seriousness, Time was petty as hell.