Chapter Text
Tuesday, May 1 - Pets
The January of their first year at U.A. is unusually and bitterly cold, but the school building has always been kept at a comfortable temperature all year long. After nearly ten months in high school, everything has stopped feeling new and novel, and started feeling routine. And this morning, as the snow falls outside in quick, twisting flurries, Izuku feels a little more like he’s standing on solid ground, instead of clawing through the mud to catch up with his classmates and mastering his quirk. He takes his seat quietly, warm inside despite the snow accumulating on the window sill and the wind buffeting the glass.
“Midoriya!”
Izuku startles as an arm slides around his shoulders and Eijirou presses himself into Izuku’s side, his smile full and cheerful and sharp, even for the early hour before class. “Look at this,” he says, holding his phone in Izuku’s face.
Tilting his head back a bit so he can focus on the screen, Izuku looks at the picture of a tiny, spotted puppy, asleep on what looks like a brand new dog bed. There's big red bow between it's floppy ears and it's little paws are poking straight out, the dark pads of it's toes shown to the camera. “Cute,” Izuku says with a soft smile, glancing up just in time to see Eijirou's happy, enraptured smile.
“Isn't she?” Eijirou says, grinning, his eyes sliding from his phone to Izuku. Izuku's heart jumps in his chest. “My moms gave her to me for Christmas! I won’t get to see her much in the dorms, but she’s really cute, right?”
“Yeah,” Izuku agrees. He’s trying his best not to get lost in the happy twinkle of Eijirou’s eyes. There’s snow still clinging to the spiked points of Eijirou’s hair, slowly beginning to melt in the warmth of the classroom. His cheeks are still a little red from the cold outside, but his arm around Izuku’s shoulders is warm and comforting.
“Thanks!” Eijirou says, leaning a little closer. Izuku can feel the heat of his breath on his cheeks, on his lips. “You should come by sometime and meet her!”
“Oh,” Izuku says, suddenly feeling a little too hot all over. He ducks his head a bit, at least to hide the flush he knows is taking over his face. “S-Sure. That sounds fun. I'd like that.”
“Awesome,” Eijirou says, softly, his smile almost blindingly happy. He steps back, and his arm falls to his side, leaving Izuku’s neck bare and cold as he retreats. And Izuku watches as, like a magnet, Eijirou’s eyes slide away as Katsuki walks through the door, and Eijirou is already bounding away.
“Oi, Bakugou, look at my dog!”
Katsuki huffs, shouldering past the red-head. “You only sent me a million stupid pictures of her over the break, I’ve fucking seen it already!” he snaps, glaring at Eijirou, his nose crickling up. “And wear a hat you idiot, or your ears will freeze off.”
He reaches out a hand and roughly musses Eijirou’s hair, the last flakes of snow destroyed along with the perfectly styled red spikes. Eijirou squawks and ducks away, running his fingers through his hair to spike it back up. “I didn’t wear a hat so it wouldn’t mess up my hair!” Eijirou whines, grinning still and bobbing away when Katsuki goes to grab for him again, a mean, teasing smile on Katsuki’s face.
Izuku watches them, trying to calm the pounding of his heart. The solid ground he thought he had been finally standing on seems to shake, and he presses his hands to his face, trying to cool the blush on his skin.
As class starts, he tries not to think about the two of them and their easy relationship, and tries not to think of the way Katsuki’s eyes soften as he ruffles Eijirou’s red hair.
Izuku knows he’s been in love with Katsuki for a long, long time. It’s just a fact now, a piece of him, just like how he knows he loves his mother, or how he admires All Might. He’s been watching with something like wonder as Katsuki has grown past scowls and glares to a more sedate smirk, his shoulders resting a little easier, his eyes a little warmer.
And Izuku has watched as Katsuki has slowly melted next to Eijirou, the two of them growing closer and closer each day.
Izuku knows he fell in love with Eijirou slowly, quietly and then suddenly all at once, as he wakes up one morning with his heart racing and wondering if Eijioru’s lips were soft. Eijirou’s smiles are kind and warm, the sort that makes Izuku stop short and stare, even if they’re in the middle of a spar and it’s Eijirou’s fist that gets him moving again.
And Izuku has watched as Eijirou has slowly gained confidence, Katsuki at his side quietly encouraging in just the way Eijirou needs.
It’s amazing to see. Even if it’s a little lonely.
The bell rings for lunch, waking Izuku from his stupor and he sighs. He catches glimpse as Katsuki and Eijirou walk out the door, side by side, their fingers just barely brushing. Katsuki’s tilted just slightly towards Eijirou, his face turned towards him. And Eijirou’s eyes are downcast, a little, soft smile on his lips and a pink blush on his cheeks.
Izuku’s heart pounds a bit and he looks away quickly, gathering up his notebooks and stowing them away into his desk. He takes his time, letting the two of them get further away before he brings himself to stand.
Being in love with Katsuki for so long had become bittersweet, had become apart of Izuku while still being separate, a limb severed at the joint, a phantom pain radiating from a healing wound. Being in love with Eijirou was almost soothing, exciting, new. It made his heart pound, and his palms sweat in a way that was addicting. It had his eyes searching out for the brightest of reds, to catch a glimpse of easy-going smiles and kind eyes. But falling in loving them both at once was just on the cusp of too much, overwhelming and encompassing. The two of them together hurt him and thrilled him in ways Izuku couldn’t hope to understand.
The worst part is, Izuku knows that what he dreams about is something he could never have, barely anything he could admit aloud even to himself.
They wouldn’t want me anyways, he thinks, and the spike of loneliness in his chest grows a little bigger. Besides, I need to focus on classes right now anyways.
“Deku-kun,” Ochako calls from their regular table when he nears. “What took you so long? Are you okay?”
“It’s fine,” Izuku says as he sits, purposefully facing away from Katsuki and Eijirou at their usual spot a few tables away with a few other of their classmates. “I was just… jotting down a few more notes,” he lies.
“How sensible of you!” Tenya says, and their table devolves into chattering about classes and after-school activities. Izuku eats his food mechanically, letting their words wash over him like static. Above the din of sound, he can hear Eijirou's boisterous laughter and tries to ignore it.