whomstdvelynt



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  1. Rec 41

    Tags
    Summary

    And finally, the door jingled open. Oliver forced his usual service worker smile and looked up to greet whoever was at the door.

    “Good evening! Welcome to the— What the fuck?” Oliver did not mean to scream those last three words as loud as he did. He took a step back as his optical sensor went wide with surprise. “Randy, what the hell.” 


    In all of his glory, Randal Jade was standing at the door, hunched over. The door closed behind him as he attempted to waddle his way forward. The thing that concerned Oliver the most was that he was covered in blood. There was even some blood caked on his phone head. Randy was usually covered in blood, but this seemed a little too excessive.

    -

    Oliver Swift is working a late night at the cinema, trying to figure out what to film for his movie that he hopes will save the cinema. Thank Phone-God that the topic of conversation walks right through the door, covered in blood.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    191,919
    Chapters:
    17/17
    Comments:
    377
    Kudos:
    336
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    6,195

    11 Apr 2024

    Bookmarker's Notes

    oh my god. OH MY GOD. literally like. the best thing ever. this is literally so amazing. i want to eat this with my bare hands. oh my god. this has forever altered my brain chemistry. i will literally never be normal again. OH MY GOD.

    i love this fic. so much. favorite forever and ever. literally giggling and kicking my feet every time i read this. this fic is so silly. i want to put it in a blender. i am so normal. GAH.

    jan. 2026 edit: i bookmarked this in april of 2024 and it still remains one of my favorite fics ever . empties has cooked like no one has ever cooked before im so serious

  2. Rec 55

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    Summary

    After arriving at Castle Town, Tenna tries in vain to get in touch with his ex-husband. Following Spamton around in the hopes of striking up a conversation, his attention is caught by a strange ring: Dark, made of thorns, and hurting Spamton to the point of rendering his entire finger useless. A good excuse for a conversation, but it all seems so strange to Tenna. Spamton never wore much jewelry when they were still partners, and the only ring Tenna can remember him ever wearing is their wedding ring—but that was such a long time ago.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,917
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    312
    Bookmarks:
    55
    Hits:
    2,694

    14 Nov 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    this shot me dead in a denny’s parking lot at five in the morning . i mean this in the best way possible . oh my god . ough ………..

  3. Rec 58

    Tags
    Summary

    Tenna's co-host has begun making some risque remarks toward him while live on air.
    Tonight is the last straw.
    or...
    What happens when an overly flirtatious businessman and an easily flustered television get locked in a janitor's closet? Surely something shocking.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,894
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    61
    Kudos:
    460
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    3,767

    09 Nov 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    oh i love these freaks ……… they bring me so much joy ………………

  4. Rec *

    Tags
    Summary

    Trader Scar's is too-empty for so comely a morning, a hollowed-out shell long rebuilt and bristling with more wares than he has those to sell them to. But it's a familiar charade— Scar slips into the back with a single sunflower clenched tight in his palm, bruising the petals and scratching against the insides of his fingers.

    When Scar steps back out to the front, a ghost is waiting patiently for him at the counter.

    "Oh," Scar says, and the word scrapes like rust from the well of his throat. He'd recognize those wings anywhere. "Well, hello there, Grian."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,113
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    84
    Kudos:
    1,267
    Bookmarks:
    170
    Hits:
    9,267

    07 Nov 2024

    Bookmarker's Notes

    ohhhhhhh sl!scar ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    THIS IS. I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS. SL!SCAR MY BELOVED. AUGH. /positive

  5. Rec 6

    Tags
    Summary

    “No, like, sometimes I really, really wanna do something I think I’ll regret the next morning.”

    What the hell is Peter supposed to say to that? It’s not like it’s the first time Roger has said something like that before either.

    Like a couple of months ago, when he and a couple of coworkers went to a bar after work, and Roger ended up drinking too much. Again. He even assured Peter that he had it under control, and that he wasn’t spiralling. Peter feels stupid for ever believing him, especially since Roger had still been in a relationship with his now ex–girlfriend.

    Out of seemingly nowhere, when they were alone in Peter’s car, Roger attempted to kiss Peter without asking. Peter obviously didn’t let it happen, and Roger had no recollection of the event the very next day.

    “It sucks,” Roger mumbles. Peter almost doesn’t catch it. “I—I want so many things and yet I—I always fuck them up. I wanted to stay sober, and now look at me."

    or; Roger makes the (bad) decision of going to a party. What can go wrong?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,115
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    57
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    535

    17 Oct 2024

    Bookmarker's Notes

    another banger by em empties. I’M GONNA CRYYYYYYYY. /positive