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You Can Lead a Horse To Water (But You Can't Stop a Man From Drinking Horse Water) by objectlesson
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis
24 Jan 2026
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Newly engaged to Jennifer Keller, Rodney is spending a weekend getaway at a resort just outside Yosemite to "celebrate," despite feeling peculiarly uncelebratory. Incidentally and totally unrelated to aforementioned circumstances, John (and Ronon) are nearby. In the park. Just in case.
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guy who is touch starved but emotionally repressed goading you into punching him for completely normal reasons by objectlesson for spurious
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis
15 Jan 2026
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"Excuse me?" Rodney snaps, narrowing his eyes. "If you think you can goad me into sparring like an idiot over hot coals, think again. I have a brain."
"We don't have to spar," John says, cocking his head. "You could just hit me."
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After 15 years together with, Cam's avoiding thinking about what happens after retirement when John is captured off-world.
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"Look, haven't you ever thought about it?"
John squeezes his eyes shut and tries to count backwards from ten. He gets to eight. "Yeah, Rodney, I make it a part of my daily routine to think about all the reasons I should be having sex with my coworkers."
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- Part 11 of 2025 Mini-Advent: 12 Days of Fics
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"These days I don't give a fuck about 'normal'." John gestured around at the hut, the ink, the Enarians chanting outside, and at Ronon, covered in sacred script.
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“You know, I've heard that normal people can have a casual discussion about their lives without looking like they're being tortured for bits of top-secret intelligence.”
In the privacy of his own mind, John could admit Rodney had a point. Aloud, he said, “Psychopaths, all of ‘em.”
(Post-canon. Rodney tries to ask a question; John does his best to answer.)
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Re: Physics Building Closed/Offices Relocated by squidgie for ArtThiefAtHeart
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis
21 Dec 2025
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As head of Atlantis University Physics Department, Rodney McKay had it all. And then a situation on campus threw his perfect life into chaos
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"You know, there's a pool on whether you and I become a thing?" He said, with the first natural smile she'd seen on him in a while. "Hot girl, hot guy, in charge. It's inevitable right?"
Elizabeth laughed. "Can you imagine?” She looked up at the intricate ceiling. Her lips quivered into a smile. “What’s the current pot?!"
OR John and Elizabeth bond over bottle of Bordeaux and a bet after the events of Phantoms.
(This is very much a friendship fic. But I get the feeling these two would enjoy the gossip.)
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Tidings of Comfort and Joy by objectlesson
Fandoms: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate - All Media Types
26 Dec 2025
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Two days before gating back to Earth for the McKay-Miller Family Christmas with John in tow, Rodney has his deepest buried truth revealed to him courtesy of an off-planet Oracle. He tries to be normal about this. Naturally, he fails.
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John’s drunk, hates Sumner, and wants something from Rodney.
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- Part 4 of McShep Cuddle ‘Verses
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jfc idk it's just more john & rodney cuddlefluff. didn't even read over it. just getting it out of my head.
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- Part 3 of McShep Cuddle ‘Verses
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When he’s seven years old, Rodney reads a short story in a pulp sci-fi magazine about a man who uploads his consciousness to a computer. When he’s thirty-eight, he very nearly lives it.
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- Part 5 of Live Oak, With McShep
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John catches another punch to the gut, and then one to the temple. Everything whites out for a moment, and when it blinks back in, Dave is yelling for them to stop. He gets hit a few more times, but none to his head, at least.
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John goes to visit his brother while Atlantis is stuck on earth. He gets into trouble.
Whumptober 2025 Day Twenty-Eight: "I could always see straight through you." Backstabbing | Constellation | Creative Restraints
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Ford and Sheppard are vetting Atlantis's mail together, when they find a video from Ford's pervert ex. It leads to some realizations. And some sex.
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- Part 19 of Zorille's No Nut Kinkvember 2025
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Ronon glares at him. "Say the words, Sheppard."
John breathes in, licks his dry lips. "I…have to be the one who dies. You—you have to kill me."
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- Part 2 of Bad Things Happen Bingo
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Hard lands make hard people, John had once heard Andy Corrigan say, and from his experience on Truebo, he believed it.
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Out of habit he looked up and found the star that held Atlantis in its orbit. It was there where it always was, second star to the right, straight on until morning. He’d thought they might always continue like that, Teyla and her lost boys tromping to adventure after adventure.
It wasn’t the first time he’d been wrong, and that had been a dream more foolish than most.
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Once, after Rodney's been doing this for a few months, Ronon looks over, cocks a single, speculative eyebrow, and says, "You know, I could just tattoo your name on him if you want, McKay."
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“I will do this,” Teyla says. If anything, she looks interested at the explanation.
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"You're all drunk, aren't you? And tomorrow, there will be a massive freak out, and then I won't have my team."