ambivalentRecluse



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    ESPN: Shane Hollander To the Ottawa Centaurs after Tumultuous End to Montreal Metros Career

    @CentaursGirlie1995: obviously i feel very badly for shane but my beautiful failson of a team getting the two best players because of homophobia is perhaps the only good thing homophobia has ever done

    --

    Or: Shane's first season on the Ottawa Centaurs, as told by everyone else in the world.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,656
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    538
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    5,451
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    25 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Both of them are there the next time Shane wakes up about an hour later, and this time he opens his eyes, rasps Mom?

    The room fills quickly, a flurry of nurses coming to check vitals and adjust his IV, the doctor stepping in to conduct all of the mandatory concussion protocol. Shane grunts and groans every time he has to move his sore body but otherwise complies as he always does, sitting through the basic questions and the light shining in his eyes. He’s up just long enough to finish those and to get something in him to eat, and just after Yuna and David both manage to sneak in tearful, relieved hugs, he’s slipping back into sleep once again. 

    Normal, they keep saying. This is all perfectly normal.

    But there’s something, Yuna thinks—something here that she’s missing. 

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,979
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    170
    Kudos:
    4,423
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    772
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    21 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Yeah, maybe Yuna should have just responded to the frantic texts. But Shane never gave them any details about the people he was dating. This Lily seemed genuinely worried, and if a phone call would get her a better read on the girl, that would be a coincidence at best. Shane knew she preferred talking on the phone, and if she used her own phone, she’d avoid invading any more of his privacy.

    She figured his current condition would be a higher priority to address than his mother calling the girl he was seeing. He’d be satisfied that his Lily would know how he was doing, and Yuna would be satisfied to connect with this girl who seemed to enchant his serious and stoic son. The phone rang twice before Yuna was sent to voicemail.

    "Hi. This is Ilya. I will never listen to your voicemail."

    Yuna may have miscalculated.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,204
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    300
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    3,586
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    646
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    21 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 80

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    Ilya knows what he is. He has always known what he is. The word for it in Russian tastes like something you'd scrape off a boot.

    The word in English is bisexual, which is a nicer word, which he has heard, which he does not use. He uses other words. He uses the word his brother taught him. He uses it on himself before anyone else can.

    He grows up. He gets good at hockey. He moves to America. He... falls in love.

    (Or, five times people fail to notice Ilya being queer, and one time they have no choice.)

    Language:
    English
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    12,457
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    1/1
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    25
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    419
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    80
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    3,738

    21 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    When the unsentimental financial imperative of the NHL sees Shane traded to the Boston Raiders, he and Ilya are thrown into closer extended proximity than ever before. As they adjust to life as teammates, they are forced to contend with the nature of their relationship -and must answer for themselves: is it even a relationship at all?
    ____

    Sliding down the wall, Shane hunched over his untied sneakers, shoved on hastily when Coach had called him in for a meeting after morning skate.

    “Boston wanted you specifically. I’ve already spoken to their GM. You’re flying this evening or tomorrow morning: I’ll confirm once the paperwork clears.”

    “Mom,” Shane managed.

    “Oh sweetie. I know, okay. Those fuckers, how dare they do this! Two fucking cups! Now all of a sudden they decide they want a reset and you’re going to fund it.”

    Shane put his head between his knees and tried to breathe. God, Boston. They hated him there; it was so far away; he was fucking their captain.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,306
    Chapters:
    14/40
    Comments:
    2,930
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    13,222
    Bookmarks:
    4,660
    Hits:
    281,961

    20 Feb 2026