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"Once, John gave me a compliment. Once, the whole time."
– Paul McCartneyJohn pays attention for just a fraction of a second longer after he’d given Paul that one compliment, and he notices how flustered it makes him. And that’s all that John wants, really – to make Paul react – so that’s all that it takes to change everything.
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It feels strange not to say anything else, but Paul can’t articulate anything else. His throat feels chafed raw, scraped clean, like someone had shoved their arm down his throat and pulled out his innards. It aches all the way down to his chest, every breath dragging against it. He keeps expecting sound to come out, but there’s only this tight, abrasive sensation, as though grief has a physical texture and it’s lodged there.
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John Lennon is dead. Paul goes to work.
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Paul finds John’s voice annoying. Paul finds a way to shut him up.
Bookmarked by Orionfin
18 Feb 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
internalized homophobia to the max but also you can see al the ways paul and john love eachother - cute
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An unstoppable force meets a not-so-immovable object. Or, John decides to pursue that affair with Paul after all.
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John had to focus on the situation before him and stop thinking about things that didn’t matter. He was there to record, and march, and be a good husband. Paul wasn’t part of the equation. Paul was uptown, probably looking for some rich bitch from an old New York family to soften the blow of his wife throwing a drink in his face and asking for a divorce. John wished him good luck in finding his second wife and prayed that Paul would leave him alone. The old times were over; the old gang had split up. They were all adults now. There was no going back to what they’d once had.
AU: After two years, Paul’s marriage ends and he moves to New York City in 1971. John doesn’t take it well.

