Heyheylemonade



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “You’re going to give me at least 30 minutes minimum access to the hotel room alone so I can find some random yahoo here and have some well-deserved sex tonight,” Lizzy demanded.
    Darcy already knows he will regret this:
    “What about me?”
    “What ABOUT you?” Lizzy rolled her eyes.
    “I mean,” Darcy continued, hoping his voice sounded even— the one in his head certainly did not, “what if you had sex with me tonight?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,583
    Chapters:
    5/5
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    1,878
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    08 Nov 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Cunnilingus by an expert: extremely attractive man in his late 20s, single, expert in the subject, offers his services FREELY to CLEAN ladies who value PERSONAL HYGIENE. Please call or text the following number and ask to talk to BIG D about his mouth, and we can make arrangements.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,489
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    154
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    3,191
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    452
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    23 Oct 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Does anyone know Lance is in love with Keith?

    Of course not. And Lance would very much like to keep it that way, thank you! Keith already doesn't want anything to do with him ever since coming back from that space whale; the last thing Lance needs on top of his crumbling self-worth and shaky standing in the team is a rejection that shatters his heart in pieces, too.

    But now, Lance got himself in a bit of a pickle. Which is fine, because Lance has a plan to get out of it! A wonderful, brilliant, masterful, completely fool-proof plan. His team won't look at him like he's more incompetent than they already do, he won't have to spend the rest of his life trapped on some alien planet, and Keith will never find out just how head over heels he is for him. It's a win-win-win situation.

    Of course, with Keith, things are never quite so simple, and Lance's plan soon causes a domino effect that changes the entire course of his life.

     

    Or:

     

    Maybe Lance should have been a little more specific when he said he'd do anything to get home. Because now...

    "You must bestow a kiss on the one your soul most desires."

    ...Fuck.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    146,137
    Chapters:
    17/17
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    5
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    1,280
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    4,918
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    18 Jul 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You in a rush or something?” Lance laughs, a little breathless. Effortless. The nonchalance of a person somehow totally at ease in their body, comfortable in any situation. Hair mussed and eyes darkened with anticipation and a smile always tugging on his mouth.
    Keith can’t stand him. They should stop this right now. They should do it every day.

    When Keith’s now-ex surprised him with a threesome, that was the last straw for their crumbling relationship. He’s resigned himself to heartache and being alone forever, but then the most annoying guy in class offers to partner with him for a project. The only problem, besides everything? Lance was the third guy in the room when Keith’s life fell apart.

    Language:
    English
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    36,008
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    263
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    845
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    204
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    11,270

    18 Jul 2025

  5. Public Bookmark 69

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    Lance doesn’t bring up his offer to have sex again. Keith doesn’t know how he’d react if he did. They skimmed past it so quickly last time, Keith had no chance to consider it.

    Nowadays, considering sex, and Lance, and sex with Lance is almost all Keith does. Some would say it’s constant. But they’d be wrong. It’s just at night and in the morning and whenever Lance is shirtless in Keith’s presence, or when he flirts with aliens, or when he looks hot fighting, or when he throws a smirk at Keith so devastating it makes his knees weak. It’s not all the time.

    A late-night conversation reveals that it’s been forever since Lance has had sex, and Keith never has. Lance offers.

    It’s such a terrible idea, Keith can’t hope to shake it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,739
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
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    Kudos:
    524
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    69
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    5,903

    17 Jul 2025