Cryingismykink
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His father spoke of it once, years ago, with the same care he used when explaining a wound that never quite healed — factual, respectful, and deeply mindful of the person beneath it.
Someone who cannot be touched. A person people fear before they know him. A boy made into a boundary long before he could decide what he wished to be.
Standing here now, looking at Joshua through silk and distance, Clive finds himself wondering what kind of person grows inside that shape. What it must be like to learn restraint before desire, composure before comfort. To be watched not for what one does, but for what one is. He wonders how much of Joshua’s stillness is choice, and how much of it is learned survival.
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The Phoenix--a boy cursed by fate from his first breath, Heir to a nation that fears him beyond measure-- is once more in need of a Shield to guard him. Someone good. Someone trustworthy. Someone steady.
Clive Murdoch, son of Rosaria's Lord Commander, has returned from the military on honorary dispatch, with healing scars and idle sword hands. He is no trained Shield. But perhaps it is time unorthodox measures be taken.
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The council stands silent at the base of the mountain, robes stiff with dust, their faces like statues carved with something colder and more ancient than fear. Wyvern can still remember the one who spoke to him- the eldest, eyes rimmed red from incense smoke, voice low like a man saying last rites, “You will not return from the summit.”
Wyvern had said nothing, already knowing that much was true. The priest looks at him- through him really, as if he were already a ghost standing before him and not the man they were willingly sending to die.
“It is not death you should fear. It is what you may feel before it.”
That had given Wyvern pause, but he didn’t ask; he hadn’t wanted to know when the priest stepped closer. Offering a whispered final truth, as if that alone would bring some peace to him, “The Phoenix is not cruel, but he is forsaken…. And the lonely make no distinction between love and hunger.”
Wyvern wasn’t sure if he suppressed the furrow in his brow, but he hadn’t tried all that hard.
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Phoenix is a cursed god whose touch destroys those who love him, whose presence demands obedience, restraint, and sacrifice. Wyvern knows this. He kneels anyway.
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Good Luck, Babe by Cryingismykink, whos_this_not_me
Fandoms: House of the Dragon (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms
15 Dec 2025
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“Stark,” Cregan says, introducing himself, though he wasn’t asked to.
Jace flushes, has no idea why, then has an idea why, then pushes it down to the dark corner where it belongs. That is not something he needs to unpack this year. After the week he’s had leading up to move-in, he needs this year to be nothing but easy and fast and not complicated and not shitty.
“Cregan!” Luke’s excited voice cuts through the room so sharply it makes Jace’s ears ring. Boxes and bags crash to the floor as his little brother rushes across the room.
Cregan pulls him into a pound hug that knocks the breath right out of Luke. Jesus, he’s big.
“I didn’t think I’d see you ‘til orientation!” Luke turns towards his brother. “Jace! This is the major mentor I told you I was emailing all summer, Cregan- Cregan, my annoying brother, Jace.”
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After his unexpected breakup, Jace wants his Junior year at King's Landing to be uncomplicated. His plan is simple: Look after Luke during his first year, keep his head down, and graduate like his mother and grandfather before him.
But after meeting Cregan, his new roommate - and his brother's Major Mentor - his plans for the year don't look so simple after all.
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“My husband can show you what needs fixing on the inside,” Aegon calls over his shoulder, “Jacaerys, make room. We have company.”
The name makes Cregan stall, staggering on the steps a bit as the corner of his toolbox hits the handrail. He manages to catch it, the crashing of the metal not being nearly as loud as the hammering in his chest. His heart’s pounding, anticipation and anxious tension building up in his hands as he tries to steady himself enough to continue up the stairs, but nearly falls out on the porch as a figure comes through the doorway.
It feels like a clock’s falling in reverse, his whole life laid out in front of him in one pitiful, humorless joke. Time’s standing still, the only thing continuously moving are those heel clad feet as they step through the door. His life is flashing before his eyes, playing over and over again in vivid color spent in tandem with someone dearest to him.
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From The Vein by Cryingismykink, whos_this_not_me
Fandoms: House of the Dragon (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms
22 Jan 2025
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"Have you ever been up against a vampyre, Stark?"
Jacaerys twists where he stands to watch the man move through the empty house, to watch those keen eyes take in every nook and cranny like any true hunter would; trained to look into obscure corners where creatures darker than shadows tend to lie.
"My entire family dedicated their lives to bringing about their extinction - for generations upon generations. Every. Single. One of them... are dead. All but me. And I'm sure to follow soon enough, if the tradition is to be abided. [...] So tell me, what do you think you or anyone from the order of the Seven could possibly offer that my family could not achieve in nine generations?"
Jacaerys shoves down the thought that creeps up in the back of his skull.
'I can help you,' Stark had said.
Like a drug, those words. Like alcohol. If you're not careful. But Jacaerys is nothing if not careful... at least when it comes to outsiders.
'I can help you.'
'And what if you could?' Jacaerys wants to say. 'What if you could, Wolf?'
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In a moment of weakness, Prince Jacaerys summons the Wolf of the North: The greatest monster hunter in the Known World, and Jacaerys' last hope.
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In the wake of Phoenix Gate, Clive fights to keep his brother's throne. For Joshua, it's a trial of loss he cannot keep from repeating. But he will find a way.
“I know,” Joshua repeats, as Clive’s fingers settle deeper in his hair, carding out the apology he can’t make. “I know you have to go. If we lose Rosalith, we lose—” Rosaria, he means to say, but Clive interrupts him.
“—I lose you. There isn’t a place I could send you on Storm safer than this city.” He smiles. “Allow me to do my duty, lord marquess.” The title sounds funny on his lips.
Joshua rises and sorts himself. “I can order you to stay.” He won’t, and he wouldn’t.
Clive’s smile tugs to one side. “You can try.”
Series
- Part 2 of by fire
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,499
- Chapters:
- 7/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 355
- Kudos:
- 1,539
- Bookmarks:
- 124
- Hits:
- 17,017
Bookmarked by Cryingismykink
29 Sep 2025
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Joshua was expected to prove his strength to the other nations through pure virility. Father had chosen Clive to act as Joshua's concubine until a more suitable mate could be found.
And Clive went willingly, nursing a heart full of remorse...
Bookmarked by Cryingismykink
16 Jul 2025
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Summary
Then he kisses him.
It’s everything Clive has ever dreaded. It’s sin, it’s burning alive, it’s swallowing fire with nowhere to spit it out. It’s like being grabbed by the throat and robbed of air. It’s oxygen – the first taste of it he’s ever had.
It’s perfection incarnate.
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After an amicable breakup with Jill, Clive comes home from college for the weekend to surprise Joshua. He knows he shouldn't. But he can't stop himself.
Series
- Part 1 of All My Love Series
Bookmarked by Cryingismykink
17 Jun 2025
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Summary
“I’m going to fall in love, Clive.”
“What?”
“Yes!” Joshua’s smile sharpened. “With someone handsome. Someone brave.”
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After their parents’ deaths, Clive sacrificed everything to preserve their decaying family estate and secure Joshua’s future—until a playful quip from his brother about romance, following his acceptance into college, ignited a twisted revelation.
Consumed by obsession, Clive’s love curdled into dark possession.
Under the cover of night, he began a chilling experiment: drugging Joshua’s sleep to sculpt his body into rejecting all touch but his own—a desperate, deranged bid to bind his brother to him forever.Unbeknownst to him, his brother’s body began developing a resistance to the drugs…
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 52,653
- Chapters:
- 13/18
- Comments:
- 131
- Kudos:
- 1,512
- Bookmarks:
- 25
- Hits:
- 4,715
Bookmarked by Cryingismykink
31 May 2025
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dragon eggs au by tereshkina
Fandom A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, House of the Dragon (TV)
25 Jul 2025
Summary
In which the riders of she-dragons are responsible for the conception of dragon eggs because the dragons themselves are incapable of fucking. It's basically A/B/O without the A, and it only exists for the Targs :)
- Words:
- 57,540
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 19
Bookmarked by Cryingismykink
18 Apr 2025