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Summary
Five doesn't remember how he ended up on the kitchen floor. He tries to link his thoughts together but a sudden creak of floorboarding from the kitchen doorway cuts his train of thought short.
There's someone else in the room.
Five goes to pick up the closest weapon. He finds himself reciting all the major arteries in the human leg until... fluffy, pink bunny slippers come into view? His gaze finds an annoyingly familiar face staring back at him.
"Hey, kiddo." Klaus drawls, bending down to meet his eye level. "Burning the midnight oil?"
Five gives stabbing Klaus in the knees a second thought. Klaus' hands try to pinch his cheeks. Five slaps them away.
Yes, a quick jab to the popliteal artery is starting to look like a good idea.
OR:
Five is finally put on the end of some mildly competent parenting/big brother-ing after he raids Reginald's alcohol cabinet. He doesn't seem to like it all that much. Guardian figures? Overrated.
Klaus is also very much done with everything.
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In which Bobby would do anything for Hanbin. For as long as he'd like, he'd get his hands dirty in his name. Even though, he knows full well Hanbin would never do the same.
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"Dave, this kid has been through unthinkable trauma. The shrink said he may never speak again, are you sure you really want to do this?"
Rossi looked at his friend for a long moment, before his eyes drifted back to the five-year-old boy, sitting quietly in his chair in the precinct, arms wrapped tightly around his stuffed elephant.
"I don't think I've ever been more sure of anything in my life."
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"Self defense. It was self defense . They would repeat that to their graves.
Sixteen stabwounds, most of them to the man’s neck and chest. It was self defense.
Kayn would make sure everyone believed Ezreal was as innocent as he knew he was loved."OR:
Ezreal - The Prince of Piltover - is stuck in a loveless engagement with a man of his Uncle's choice.
Kayn - The Prince of Ionia - is a hot prick who always finds a way to annoy him in social and political events.
They fall in love secretly, and now Ezreal has to deal with his fiance's wrath, one way or another. -
Treehouse of Horror: The Bumbling Salesman by pizzahutz_inthegarage
Fandoms: The Simpsons
18 Oct 2024
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Summary
During a suicide attempt, Moe gets interrupted by Gil Gunderson, a mysterious but incompetent salesman who claims to "fill the gaps in your empty soul".
Gil gives Moe an item that will make his business successful, but with one rule Moe must never break...
Don't lose your temper.
(Parody based off the anime "The Laughing Salesman")
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